Did You Miss School? NO PROBLEM.

Did You Miss School?  NO PROBLEM.

Did You Miss School?  NO PROBLEM.  Yes we did learn a lot in school, no debate on that.  Having said this, there are some things that you DON'T.  These LIFE LESSONS are NOT taught in school.  It would help if you learned them the HARD WAY though.  True, school teaches us the sound fundamentals to be successful in life.  Name it.  Math.  Science.  And even History📗📙📘

BUT, we hope we reach a consensus here that NOT everything is taught in school.  To name a few of these LIFE LESSONS:

SWOT - Strength, Weakness, Opportunities and Threats.  Acknowledging your strengths and weaknesses is one of the biggest challenges you will face in your life.  We need to take a long and hard look in the mirror and find out WHAT we are good at and HOW our strengths can help us succeed💦💦💦

MANAGE EXPECTATIONS - A big chunk of the disconnects in our life is caused by EXPECTATIONS not being aligned between the person executing OR delivering something versus his stakeholder to whom that expectation is vested.  As it is normal that two expectations CAN'T be identical at the outset, MANAGING EXPECTATIONS is a MUST-DO not just for alignment but being on the same page pre-empts the probability of a disconnect.  As we all have different expectations, and we like to project unto others WHAT we deem as important, we tend to count on others to have the same OR similar expectations as we do💧💧💧

CRITICAL THINKING - Unfortunately, even psychologists admit that CRITICAL THINKING is a learned ability that must be taught.  Unfortunately, most individuals NEVER learn CRITICAL THINKING, putting everything in their lives at risk.  Frankly, CRITICAL THINKING involves logical analysis and comprehension of the links between concepts, making it a fundamental skill for success.  WHAT happens if we DON'T have this ability?  We may fail to process and analyze information effectively💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  Much as we spend close to two decades in school [till we graduate from university], there are tons of LIFE LESSONS we need to learn by heart.  You might ask, are there consequences if we DON'T learn those LIFE LESSONS?  Yes, there are tons of ramifications and we can't understate the importance of all these LIFE LESSONS.  Heard of folks who even graduated With Honors from their university but have been noticeably flops in their real life?  Quite a lot though but that jinx can be cut and cut clean if we acknowledge the need for us to pick up and lear these LIFE LESSONS way after we have stepped out of our school's portals✅✅✅

Is BALANCING Act A Fallacy?

Is BALANCING Act A Fallacy?

The ongoing Paris Olympics has been on the headlines for several weeks now and it's that expected as we witness world-class athletes prove their supremacy in their respective fields.  Now, Is BALANCING Act A Fallacy?  Do we think the olympic champions did run their lives with a BALANCING ACT?  Balancing training vis-a-vis family and even personal relationship???

It's a loud NO sirrrrrrs.  They NEVER ran that BALANCING ACT in their life.  Instead, their uncompromising priority was their trainings.  Anything and everything else would play either second, third, fourth fiddle as long as those did NOT compromise OR impact their trainings.  I was never onsite at Paris Olympics BUT WHEN I pictured myself interviewing the olympic medallists, I am cocksure that they will give credit to their training regimen [and that includes coaches and even training facilities]!!!

Before I get bashed for riding on the bandwagon and the coat tails of the olympic champions, we can sing in unison that the first key in SUCCESS for these athletes was their uncompromising DEDICATION to their training.  This means having a 'laser focus' on your goals and being willing to put in the HARD WORK to achieve them.  WHETHER it means getting up early for extra training sessions OR staying up late to study game techniques even on video, these DEDICATED athletes understand that every minute counts and that they must make the most of every opportunity to improve.  And they NEVER stop there💥💥💥

These olympic champions understand that achieving their goal requires making sacrifices and managing their time wisely.  They must be willing to say NO to distractions even like social media OR hanging out with friends and instead focus on their trainings and schedules.  Oh yes, there is one word that is a bit contentious and indeed controversial WHEN we talk about SACRIFICES BUT WHILE we often talk about making SACRIFICES to achieve our goals, it's imperative to remember that their training was at the top of the totem pole✅✅✅

Our takeaway:  Ultimately, the success of these athletes were left in their very own hands.  Those WHO are UNCONDITIONALLY willing to focus on their trainings [with NO compromise] will determine their level of success and those with that uncompromising dedication are more likely to succeed than those WHO are NOT.  We heard this same refrain NOT just from the recent olympic medalists BUT even from the losers WHO, mostly admitted, they were ill-prepared to compete for various factors affecting their trainings.  So IS BALANCING ACT A FALLACY?  Yes it is❗❗❗

Laziness Is Our Enemy #1

Laziness Is Our Enemy #1

NO NO NO sirrrrrrrrrrrrs. Please DON'T get me wrong. I am NOT promoting OR encouraging Laziness [especially at work],  BUT if there is anything obvious, it is true that LAZINESS Is Our Enemy #1.  Problem is, LAZINESS can be defined or understood as either a lack of motivation, fatigue OR even plain brain fog.  Exploring the cause of HOW you feel is the first step toward resolving it.  Giving yourself a break, setting realistic goals, OR even asking for help

BUT if a LAZY day happens, YES it happens to the best of us.  In these busy times, taking the occasional LAZY day ISN'T just alright BUT it could be your much needed 'shot in the arm'.  NOW here's the catch.  If you observe that those LAZY days seem to be 'trending' more often than NOT, and you're having trouble getting things done, it could be a sign that there's 'SOMETHING' going on.  If it's at the workplace, could it be a lack of passion for your job?  OR is there just an overwhelming to-do list and even an underlying medical condition are just some of the things that can interfere with your desire to get things done

So, the $64 question is, is there an antidote to LAZINESS?  Can it be stopped?  Unfortunately, the answer may NOT be as cut and dry as you'd expect.  WHILE some people may be more prone to being lazy than others, even highly productive will absolutely find it challenging to get things done sometimes.  BUT tireless experts NEVER stopped figuring out how to stop LAZINESS, here we go:

MAKE MANAGEABLE GOALS - Setting unrealistic goals and taking on too much can lead to burnout.  Experts advise us to avoid overloading by setting smaller, attainable goals that will get you WHERE you want to be without overwhelming yourself

NEVER EXPECT YOURSELF TO BE PERFECT [because you are NOT] - Truth is, perfectionism is on the rise and it's taking its toll on us all.  This rise in perfectionism is causing people to be overly critical of themselves and even others

ADOPT POSITIVE [NOT NEGATIVE] SELF-TALK - Otherwise, NEGATIVE SELF-TALK can derail your efforts to get things done in every aspect of your life

CREATE A PLAN of ACTION - Planning HOW you will get something done can make it easier to get there.  Be realistic in your plans

Our takeaway:  Let us leverage on our strengths.  Take a moment to think about WHAT your strengths are WHEN setting goals OR gearing up to tackle a task.  Consider to apply them to different aspects of a task to help you get things done.  Dude, dismantling our ENEMY #1 is no mean feat BUT it can be done ONLY IF YOU WILL YOUR WAY❗❗❗

Dropouts And NOT Burnouts

Dropouts And NOT Burnouts

Many years ago, I was then an entry-level then at Oil Giant SHELL when our Dutch I.T. Manager announced that he was going back to the Netherlands because of BURNOUT.  Being naive and very raw at that time [and lo and behold, internet technology was extremely raw at that time], I had to go to Mr Webster and find the definition of BURNOUT.  Fast-forward today, you WON'T believe it, HOW TIME FLIES, the buzzword now is Dropouts And NOT Burnouts, and this pushes me in a dizzying spin and spell.  WHAT THE f____.  WHAT about DROPOUTS📗📙📘

For alignment, in the simplest terms, BURNOUT refers to that state WHEN or WHERE you reached that point you DON'T feel that drive and/or motivation to push with your core activities, e.g. working if you're a worker.  WHEREAS DROPOUTS has no deeper meaning than dropping out from the slate.  And even the statistics from the United States is alarming, with a national dropout rate of 10.9%.  That's HUGE and that's a HUGE problem, ISN'T it?  If a first world country like the U.S. can have that kind of stats data, WHAT can we expect from the data coming from the Third World countries?  BTW, this is NOT to be discriminatory of Third World countries💥💥💥

BUT my take here is that it's quite a stretch for us to concoct a sort of 'EPIDEMIC of OVERWORK' because that's illusionary, to say the least.  YET, the global movement to shift to a four-day working week seems to gaining ground, generating that steam.  Yesterday, no less than liberal U.S. Senator Bernie Sanders floated the idea of pushing for a four-day workweek.  And even in China, many young Chinese are so worried about their country's 996 work culture [9 to 9 six days a week] that they have even started a 'LYING FLAT' movement ['Tang Ping' in Chinese] and brutally they exclaimed 'WE EMPLOYEES ARE TOO TIRED.  WE HAVE TO LIE DOWN'.  But the mind-boggling question is, IS "HARD" REALLY SUCH A BAD THING?  Huhuhu💦💦💦

Interestingly, or rather amusingly, to answer that question seems much more interesting than the apostles of overwork suggest.  Truth is, even the latest economic data show that, on average, people are working fewer hours than ever.  Working hours have even declined the most in countries with higher GDPs because it takes fewer hours of work to earn a comfortable living.  Housework is also much more efficient, thanks to technology✅✅✅

Our takeaway:  Our workers today must work harder than our predecessors for the simple reason that there is so much more knowledge to absorb.  YOUNG lawyers MUST absorb more case law.  YOUNG bankers must command more recondite techniques.  It is possible that AI [Artificial Intelligence] will eventually reduce the pressure on our workers.  Ironically, WHAT's happening is the opposite.  It seems that technological advances seem to trigger the opposite effect WHEREBY it increases the pace and tempo of transactions.  And personally, this is an unwelcome burden as it seems DROPOUTS is becoming more prevalent even as BURNOUTS are now a thing of the past😖😖😖

Shoot Your Shot!

Shoot Your Shot!

In case you're watching basketball games, how often you would hear the crowd egging the player with the balll to Shoot Your Shot?  Probably many times. In real life though, we would often encouragements to Shoot Your Shot for various reasons.  If it's all about basketball itself, even our coaches will tell us that once you got the ball and you're need the 'CUP' Shoot Your Shot.  In relationships, things become a bit trickier because making the first move is often intimidating BUT it can become downright scary if you're uncertain WHERE the other person stands, right?  The FEAR therein DOESN'T mean you SHOULDN'T try BUT before trying, it might be worth exploring your hesitation, the viability and feasibility rolled into one📗📙📘

So, WHAT really scares us?  Is that the very first time you're putting yourself out there OR have you done it before and had painful, embarrassing or worse, traumatic experience?It is essential to remember that every person and context is unique.  Give people that opportunity to prove you wrong, to show up in a way that they choose to.  OR is there something from a previous experience that you have learned that can help inform HOW you SHOOT YOUR SHOT this time❓❓❓

You might play devil's advocate, WHY SHOOT if you're not ready yet?  That's hogwash and baloney dude. To test the waters, you got to SHOOT YOUR SHOT.  BTW, the probability is that in your first batches of attempts, your shot attempts will flop OR fumble.  BUT that's the essence why you need to SHOOT YOUR SHOT because only then will you be able to tweak and adjust things as you fumble and miss in your previous attempts💥💥💥

The blunt message ot us is this:  STOP waiting for everything to be perfect [because it is likely that things will NEVER be perfect]  before you take action on your dreams.  SHOOT YOUR SHOT and adjust from there.  WHEN I took the risk of exploring my career options in Singapore many years ago, I have to admit that there was a high probability of me failing in that attempt BUT unless you swam and dived, I WON'T have that chance❎❎❎

Our takeaway:  DON'T take too long to hesitate making those attempts.  DON'T pre-empt things even before you attempt.  DON'T fear making those mistakes.  DON'T wait for things to be perfect [BECAUSE IT WILL NEVER BE].  DON'T wait to take action when there are NO RISKS because every action has its corresponding RISKS.  DON'T think that you have all the time in world because you got to remember that you live on BORROWED TIME, so if you procrastinate now, there may be NO TOMORROW for you to SHOOT YOUR SHOT.  Lastly, whether you take it figuratively OR literally, the fact is PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT.  There's just NO other way to SHOOT YOUR SHOT😀😀😀

Those LOW-HANGING FRUITS!

Those LOW-HANGING FRUITS!

Getting stalled or stuck? With hardly any progress? How about Those LOW-HANGING FRUITS?  BUT the fact is, NOTHING is going to CHANGE unless you do something about it.  And it's true, CHANGE can be difficult BUT some of the best things in life come from challenging and tougher times.  And sometimes we all need a FLIP in perspective even if it's simply just to show us HOW lucky we are and HOW much we need to appreciate WHAT we have📗📙📘

In fact, psychologists claim that in their studies, those really simple things can alter your view point, allowing for greater opportunity and even happiness.  Allow to rewind back from my past and share those LOW-HANGING FRUITS I did grab:

TAKING ACTION - Without beating my chest, through and through my life I am very ACTION-oriented.  WHEN I conceptualize something, it goes through a quick proof of concept and once I validate it as feasible, I go and take ACTION, not dilly-dallying or  procrastinating at all💧💧💧

EMBRACE AN IDEA [without depending on others' opinions] - Sadly, we spend huge chunks of our life caring WHAT other people think.  Then, ironically, we feel sad WHEN others just DON'T care enough.  Now, should we spill a little-known secret that can flip your world upside down?  YES, NO ONE CARES, seriously.  

BE DETAILED of PATTERNS IN LIFE - It is probably unfortunate BUT most of us have a few toxic traits [I had my fair share too, ouch] like you notice friends ditch you time to time

GOT TO SAY 'NO' [if need to] - If you feel drained, exhausted OR stretched, learning to say 'NO' is one of the best things you can do to your life.  It can even transform you and your life, giving you more time for the things you need and less time for others

USE WHAT YOU HAVE - Let's admit it, there's one too many wastage we're witnessing all over the place.  From plastics to food getting thrown.  One SMALL thing you can do in your life [and hope there's a small dent of impact] is to reuse what you have

BE MOBILE - In short, MOVE A LOT MORE.  And it DOESN'T have to be extreme.  BUT there's tons of evidence backing up exercise benefits for us✅✅✅

Our takeaway:  BIG DREAMS are BIG and nice to dream about.  BUT WHAT we need are concrete results.  WHAT better way than you starting to move even by inches even if that means you're barely scratching the surface.  INSTEAD of you reliving the frustrations of millions of people with grandiose plans BUT even as we speak now, millions of 'horror stories' abound where DREAMS have remained as such because NO one bothered to even lift a finger for the LOW-HANGING FRUITS💙💛💚

Where Have Our Hobbies Gone?

Where Have Our Hobbies Gone?

Cartoon cards collection.  Comics collection,  Coins collection. Stamp collection.  Where Have Our Hobbies Gone?  I tried to revisit the state of HOBBIES around the world.  In the United States, there were 58,000 members of the American Philatelic Society.  Today, the total members do number less than half that number.  In the U.K., the average age of collectors is over 60.  In Asia, if you ask anyone below 30 years of age, WHO would know anything about comics, coins, OR even stamp collection❓❓❓

Those kinds of HOBBIES  seem to be disappearing and even those eccentric collections like postcards, shells and even luggage labels seem to be in a terminal decline.  You might ask me, WHAT does this got to do with our life now?  Unfortunately, today, HOBBIES remain one of the last apparently legitimate areas of ridicule.  Perhaps that's WHY they've faded away.  How's our life now without those???

NOT to be nostalgic BUT no less than psychologists share the results of their researches WHEREIN they share that engaging in a HOBBY is an excellent way to relieve stress and break away from your daily routine.  And their studies have proven THAT having a hobby can significantly benefit your overall health.  Although some may feel like they DON'T have time for HOBBIES, these activities can enhance physical and even mental wellness and even directly OR indirectly boost productivity.  In brief, it is really that imperative to prioritize self-care and set aside time for HOBBIES.  As an added bonanza, HOBBIES give our brains a much-needed break to engage in creativity

Before I get whacked for strongly pushing for us to give more impetus to HOBBIES, allow me to clear up that in NO WAY am I disowning OR rejecting social media because that will be deeply embedded in our daily lives FOREVER [until probably we circled around in a full circle and go back to the pre-historic and medieval times [WHICH is next to impossible to happen at all].  Nevertheless, it's worth reinforcing here at least the most obvious benefits of HOBBIES, hoping we can still turn things around:

• MENTAL HEALTH & WELL-BEING - obviously.

• HOBBIES reduce stress.  Participating in HOBBIES has proven that it reduces stress levels, resulting in decreased cortisol levels.
• HOBBIES improves relationships & productivity - Team sports have shown the importance of developing social relationships and friendships which can contribute to improved mental health.  Additionally, studies show adults to be LESS LIKELY to experience depression, anxiety OR stress

Let's loosen up, re-engage in our hobbies💥💥💥

Be Genuine, Period

Be Genuine, Period

Not to be defensive but the real truth is I have tons and tons of imperfections BUT NOT being GENUINE is NOT one of them.  In fact, to Be GENUINE, I hold it closest to my heart more than anything else.  It's true to that being TRUE to oneself takes confidence, tenacity and often even bravery WHICH is WHY people tend to gravitate toward those WHO are genuine and authentic.  Let's face it, across cultures and societies, we tend to value GENUINE people and think poorly of those WHOM we perceive as being 'FAKE'.  BUT the question is, WHY IS THAT❓❓❓

Just like children, we adults are strongly encouraged to 'ALWAYS SPEAK HOW YOU FEEL and NEVER BE SORRY FOR BEING REAL'.  After all, WHAT motivates 'FAKENESS' is an effort to appear more appealing OR impressive, so shouldn't we find people WHO care about our opinions more appealing than those WHO, by definition, do their own thing regardless of WHAT we think?  BUT we shouldn't think along those lines because it does NOT augur well from a GENIUINENESS perspective💦💦💦

BUT in essence, we should be more likely to trust a GENUINE person than a fake one because we believe those WHO are true to themselves are also lively to be truer and more honest to us.  As we often associate GENUINENESS with appealing traits such as strength of character and emotional resilience and correctly so, as being true to yourself takes confidence, tenacity and sometimes, even some semblance of bravery💥💥💥

As research studies show, many 'JOURNEYS' of self-improvement and self-discovery involve efforts to live a more authentic life.  Adopting the below-listed habits given by experts will go a long way to help us become a more GENUINE person:

1. GENUINE PEOPLE SPEAK THEIR MINDS
2. GENUINE PEOPLE RESPOND TO INTERNAL EXPECTATIONS, and NOT TO EXTERNAL ONES
3. GENUINE PEOPLE FORGE PATHS
4. GENUINE PEOPLE ARE NOT THREATENED BY POTENTIAL FAILURE
5. GENUINE PEOPLE CAN ADMIT FAULTS
6. GENUINE PEOPLE ARE NOT JUDGMENTAL
7. GENUINE PEOPLE HAVE SOLID SELF- ESTEEM

Our takeaway:  Endeavor to develop that AUTHENTICITY within you.  This is self-initiated and no one else can push you on this.  Observe yourself objectively to develop that AUTHENTICITY and DON'T overlook the need to examine family belief systems to develop that AUTHENTICITY.  And DON'T miss out to identify discrepancies to further develop your AUTHENTICITY.  It can be done, dude✅✅✅

Getting Back On Your Feet

Getting Back On Your Feet

Everyone of us do have experiences [I had tons of it] in life WHEN things DON'T go as planned OR expected.  BUT being able to adapt to situations is a really valuable skill.  And WHILE it is indeed difficult to wade through WHEN it happens, once you've picked yourself back up, past failures can motivate you to do an even much better job the next time around.  As everyone says, 'FAILURE IS THE INEVITABLE PRICE OF TRYING TO DO SOMETHING'.  And indeed, that forces you to be even more creative as you look for new ways to approach a specific pursuit in life.  BUT can we agree that to Getting Back On Your Feet, we need an INSPIRATION but let's admit it, finding INSPIRATION from FAILURE is often easier said than done📗📙📘

I can easily relate myself to this dilemma during those times in the past when I was like near that 'gutter level', so near to the drainage that I could have been easily flushed out by just a normal water flow, without for torrential rains and flash floods to flush me out.  So, you might ask, HOW did I pick up the pieces?  First and foremost, I had to OWN UP to all my misses, my lapses, my shortfalls.  That was some of my toughest times in my life BUT I had to summon the remaining energy and fortitude 'LEFT IN MY TANK' for me to GET BACK ON MY FEET'.  Hard as it may be, I had to recognize that there was NO other way for me to resuscitate things💚💛💜

WHAT is it most psychologists are expecting from us when we are in the doledrums?  Being able to recognize a FAILURE means that you'll be able to re-cast it into something more likely to succeed.  FAILURE teaches you WHAT DOESN'T work, in fact.  Oh, I often hear this:  YOU NEED A SHOT IN THE ARM.  And this reminds us to remember our PAST SUCCESSES.  True, you FAILED this time BUT that is just a piece of a bigger picture💦💦💦

So, experts are counselling us that instead of dwelling on WHERE you went WRONG, remember all the times WHEN things went right.  And find a way to learn from your latest mistake in the same way you've learned from other ones.  And WHAT could be a much better 'ICING ON THE CAKE' than you yourself TAKING ACTION.  Once you've accepted your FAILURE, it's important to make decisions about WHAT you'll do next, because SIMPLY DOING NOTHING will only keep you stagnated WHERE you are💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  It's easier said than done but similar to a RESET or a REBOOT, So your NEXT STEP DOESN'T have to be BIG.  Sometimes, a small CHANGE can become a major turning point.  WHEN other people talk about their careers, it can seem AS IF everything was part of a grand plan.  BUT that is rarely true.  Try just going with something and see WHERE it takes you, dude😊😊😊

Never Reveal Your GOALs

Never Reveal Your GOALs

Social media is saturated with GOALS and DREAMS.  Nothing wrong sharing it in those platforms BUT here's a big BUT.  If you are plotting your major GOALs in life and even before you take the first steps, if you did share it across social media, even if you initially shared it to your close coterie of friends.  Your friends will share it their friends WHO may NOT be your friends.  True, most of them will be sharing it in good faith.  Before you know it, your personal goal you shared to your close coterie of friends has now propagated across multitudes of people whose names you haven't even heard from Adam.  Now, the BIG ASK, what's the fuss if your goal has now spread all over the social media communities?  Not to fuss about it BUT Never Reveal Your GOALs📗📙📘

Now, before I get doubted that I am into double-speak, please allow me to admit that I do WALK THE TALK.  Many years ago, NO ONE, as in NO ONE, and NOT even my loved ones, knew the major GOAL I plotted for the next twelve months.  NOT a knee-jerk reaction to events that may trigger personal decisions, I thoroughly assessed the horizons and I told myself, nope, I DON'T want to spend the next ten years in my home country.  NOT because I fell out of love with my home country and culture BUT rather because I plotted my medium-term career plans.  NOT out of selfishness.  NOT out of non-transparency.  NOT out of ill-intentions.  NOT out of bad faith.  Now, WHO amongst you ever announced a personal goal to lose weight to the world and ended up staying the same OR even gaining more weight than ever❓❓❓

We can even look back to those year-on-year New Year's Resolutions we are all so damn busy right before the New Year kicks in.  Yes, you can think of resolutions as setting goals or setting intentions.  Being satisfied with progress towards our GOAL is associated with positive emotions.  These positive emotions provide the motivation necessary to continue pursuing our GOALs.  Unfortunately, setting a GOAL does NOT always culminate in the desirable changes.  Thus, a critical solution would have to address how to close the gap between the intention and the execution [at work, we call it IMPLEMENTATION].  the demonstrable way to close the gap between intention and implementation is to 'PRIVATIZE' our intentions.  People tend to make their GOALs public , BUT research has shown that publicizing GOALs might jeopardize chances to achieve the GOALs📌📌📌

Researches by experts reveal that when we publicize our GOALs, especially the ones that have to do with our identity, our goal-related performance is compromised.  Ironically, this effect was only found for participants WHO are very committed to their GOAL.  And the experts state that the LESSON LEARNED is that the more passionate you about your GOALs, the more secretive you should be❎❎❎

From a layman like me, the question is, WHY would making our GOALs public reduce the likelihood of achieving them?  Experts explain that making GOALs and any progress toward implementation generate positive rewarding feelings.  In order for these emotions to be motivational until our GOALs are realized, that 'REWARD' has to be time-released.  Dude, for now, keep your GOALs to yourself.  Beat your chest and blow your horns once you achieve it❗❗❗