Why the Pursuit of Happiness Makes Us Unhappy

Why the Pursuit of Happiness Makes Us Unhappy

Who doesn't need money ?  Everyone does, right ?But can we have a consensus here that all those monies CAN'T and WON'T buy us happiness at all.  Obviously, there will be moments and milestones in life wherein we felt we have achieved the happiness we all wanted.  Graduating with honors.  Landing a plum job.  Going up the ladder of the organization faster than expected.  Settling down.  Driving our first car, albeit a second hand.  Having our own home, albeit it's basic and modest enough to start with.

But are we on the same page if I state categorically that our desires are just too insatiable, unquenchable, unappeasable and it becomes a vicious cycle we can't extricate ourselves out. We just momentarily savor those moments of happiness in a mundane and profane manner we humans are always known for.  When the excitement has dissipated, when the last kampai of the celebration has finally faded in the darkness of the night, we're back to where we were right at Day-1.

We don't need to dig up the archives.  Last year, the world's hitherto #1 billionaire, Jeff Bezos, divorced his wife.  Last month, Microsoft founder Bill and Melinda Gates announced their divorced.  You might argue but they are bigtime personalities hence we're aware of that but would you agree that there are hundreds of millions living in the poverty line who have divorced ?  So the social strata does not matter, after all.

When you are 'in the moment', that's fine but once the dust has settled down, can I bet my whole month's salary that in your pursuit of your happiness, you will end up UNHAPPY ?  That regardless of your milestone successes, those will just fleet by and when things get passed behind you, there you go again in that vicious cycle, grinding and kicking your ass hard as you continue to pursue the happiness you want.  Unfortunately, the GOAL POST KEEPS CHANGING.

Now, Charlie Brown may be nothing more than fiction but there is an absolute truism in what he says, i.e. "I THINK I'M AFRAID TO BE HAPPY BECAUSE WHENEVER I GET TOO HAPPY, SOMETHING BAD ALWAYS HAPPENS".  Even in my life, this happened a zillion times.  I was just ecstatic during those moments when I recently achieved or acquired something.  Once things faded, I was back to my ownself, figuring out to be happy [AGAIN]!

I may not be a Buddhist but one of Budhha's teachings is that our suffering stems from attachment.  It may be normal to desire things but our desires are endless.  If we make our own happiness or SENSE of SELF-WORTH dependent upon things going a certain way, then we are MISERY-bound.  The more we cling of what things should be, our misery will remain deep-seated.  Time for us to get out from the mud folks.✅✅✅