Nothing Gets Hidden Forever!

 

NOTHING GETS HIDDEN FOREVER. It's true the scents of perfume smell so nice.  Meanwhile, through the centuries that we are aware of [at least even referencing our history books], TRUTH prevails regardless if it is a positive OR negative one.  Just like in our own homes, at times, we tend to sweep the dust under the carpet and even keep anything that smells unpleasant way beyond.  BUT it goes only as far as time can handle it BUT for how long?  Even more than 6 years after his suicide while imprisoned, that JEFFREY EPSTEIN saga has dragged one too many personalities and as it is, scandals know NO BOUNDARIES.  You can even be a member of the British Royalty like the former 'PRINCE' Andrew, one of the key members of the Mountbatten-Windsor Family💚💛💜

Studies show that much as our body needs ATP [Adenosine Triphosphate], that universal energy currency molecule our brain needs, it needs that constant supply of ATP to 'power' its functions such as neurotransmitter cycling.  Surprisingly, without that ATP, our brain cannot perform complex tasks like forming thought OR even moving muscles.  And the derived conclusion is that it is human nature for us to be as perfect as possible💧💧💧

Then, voila, WHAT happens next?  Lies and dishonesty may creep in.  BUT the huge catch here is that no one and nothing can ever-ever hide the truth for so long, including the most unpleasant ones.  BUT here's the thing.  WHY can there be chronic and idemic lies over and over again?  WHEN some things are better left unsaid, NOT because they are shameful OR wrong BUT because saying them out loud might do more harm than good.  YES, we all do have passing thoughts, small frustrations, OR those private feelings that live in the quiet corners of our minds.  And sometimes, sharing every single one of them does not help BUT instead, it chips things away❌❌❌

So, here's a NOT so challenging question.  Does keeping something to yourself mean you are being dishonest?  I had to sneak into the world views even from psychology experts and in unison, their response is "NOT ALWAYS"!.  As there is a difference between hiding and choosing peace.  Between silence and secrecy, knowing WHEN to speak and WHEN to stay silent is a quiet skill, one that grows with time, trust and even, hold your breath, unconscious care.  These experts further opine that because while dishonesty matters deeply, NOT all truths need to be voiced to be valid.  Sometimes, keeping a few personal secrets is just a softer way of holding space💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  Interestingly, allow me to paste here instances WHERE experts opine are better off as UNSAID:  Those small annoyances that do NOT truly matter.  Those doubts that could be just passing emotions.  Past hookups that have NO relevance now [YES, your own history is YOURS😡😡😡]  Those opinions and heresay that remain as such.  WHY repeat them?  True, NOTHING GETS HIDDEN FOREVER but NOT everything is either black OR white from this dimension, dude😁😁😁

Digging Deeper Into The Weeds

 

Oh Oh, sorry folks, I'm NOT misleading you towards agriculture as I was NOT born with that 'green thumb' BUT instead, this brings us back to our small planet earth WHERE there are just one too many myriad micro-level stuff, enough to catch us by our lapels.  Literally, think about the restaurant cook trying to cope up with the mile-long queue of food orders.  At that point, HOW else can the Cook DIG DEEPER INTO THE WEEDS???

I remember when I was @Shell, WHERE for the very first time, I got introduced into those very structured annual performance reviews and come the review period, I'd do WHAT I need to do and during my F2F's with each of my team members, they had a common reaction, that my narratives were way too verbose, too long, and they thought they were reading a book, ouch.  I thought that was a complement but belatedly, I realized that it was the opposite.  Ouch, that hurts, sort of❎❎❎

NOT to be defensive, I came across this quote from Anthony D'Angelo. And instantly, I told myself, Oh Oh, I was doing the right things after all!!!  BUT there are two sides of the coin here.  One is, DIGGING DEEPER INTO THE WEEDS to fix and resolve a problem, even finding its very root cause.  On the other hand, from a leadership perspective, this leads us to that judgment call we have to make💚💛💜

WHICH brings me back to one of the annual reviews WHERE I was at the receiving end.  Much as it seems that I performed well that year [from the perspective of my Dutch expat line manager then], my improvement area [as per my boss then] was for me to manage OR contain my tendencies to be 'micro-managing' things.  And NOT to be defensive, I acknowledged it as a valid observation and NOT to defend myself, I explained that having started as a 'techie' from the ground up, I had that tendency💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  Let's close this out from two different perspectives.  From a problem-solving scenario, YES, we gotta DIG DEEPER INTO THE WEEDS because that's the only way to eke out the very root cause and apply that final fix.  Other than that scenario, it behooves that we should pull-in OR pull-out depending on the circumstances enveloping you at that time.  WHAT's important here is your timely moves IN or OUT when DIGGING DEEPER INTO THE WEEDS😗😗😗

Reading That 'READING' Challenge!

 

Donkey years back, one of the most pressing challenges in the Third World was addressing the very low literacy rate.  Unsurprisingly, one of the most common tack was 'book campaigns' to encourage READING.  Fast forward to today, as we speak, is READING still a challenge?  Yesss absolutely it's a challenge BUT NOT because of illiteracy, NOT that train of thought💥💥💥

Many years ago in our high school days, if there was a constant pressure we were enduring, it's the never-ending 'book reports' we had to comply with.  Those HARDY BOYS book series, I remember that WHEN the bell rings and classes end, you can imagine opening the floodgates and the huge flow of water almost envelopes the library.  Fast-forward to today, as we speak, TIMES HAVE CHANGED dude!  That literacy rate?  That's NEVER a talking point now as the onrush of multimedia and social media.  In one third world country I'm very familiar with, the saturation rate for TV is 34% whereas for mobile phones, it has breached 95% as of January 2025, whew💚💛💜

NOW, times have changed!  Years back, I seemed to have an unlimited bandwidth for reading, sometimes tucking a book under my pillow for an unfinished book and as recent as the Pre-Pandemic years, each time I go to the more popular local fast food in my place, I would always request for a copy of the day's broadsheet newspaper.  Sadly, from the time we went through that Pandemic lockdown and even as we speak now, those broadsheet newspapers are totally non-existent in the most popular fast food chain here.  Collateral damage you might call it☝☝☝

BUT can we agree that READING struggles are LIFE's struggles as well?  As much as I CAN'T and WON'T claim to be a voracious reader, I have to humbly admit that somehow, I have achieved that level of consistency of at least NOT losing that appetite to read.  I remember even during those 'redeye' flights WHEN the whole cabin has been dimmed and there was nothing except that eerie silence.  And alternating between inflight movies, music and e-Books, often I would end up with e-Books WHEN I felt saturated with either the movies OR music.  The only trick is that I needed to know WHAT reading stuff I can browse via the inflight entertainment system.  WHERE I fail to find the stuff I was hungering to read, it pays to be familiar with the kinds of inflight printed reading stuff normally available!!!

Our takeaway:  Let's run some WHAT IF's.  WHAT IF our normal self WON'T have that appetite even for the barest minimum reading appetite?  NOT to scare you dude, I'm afraid that more often you will be at least half a step behind, if NOT a step OR many steps behind.  And WHEN a handicap indeed becomes a handicap, it will eventually impact you down the road, less informed, less updated, less aligned with the goings-on.  Ironically, unlike before you had to go through Amazon or run down to your favorite bookstore, these days, all it takes is to grab your smart device scour the web for that reading stuff to whet your appetite.  Dude, this is all about Reading that 'READING' challenge😡😡😡

Facts Vs Truth

 

FACTS versus TRUTH, are they one and the same synonym, redundant enough to co-exist?  Rightfully, if we go 'by the books', obviously, they are [supposedly] one and the same, right?  For alignment, FACTS, as defined by AI, are objective and verifiable statements that can be proven with evidence WHILE TRUTH is a more subjective concept as we would derive both the meaning and our understanding from those FACTS, WHICH at times are poles apart💚💛💜

As much as both FACTS and TRUTH have been loosely and interchangeably used throughout these times, in a plurality of disconnects that turn into arguments and later on worsen into full-blown conflicts, not just amongst people BUT even between countries and geo-politics powers.  We might get puzzled, HOW in the world disconnects would still sprout considering all the FACTS are laid-out across?  Exactly my point.  Even as FACTS are indisputable, they can still be objectively verified and proven as such via artefacts and evidence.  OH YES, FACTS are NOT decided on as regards the number of people WHO would agree to it OR accept it as such, as FACTS💥💥💥

WHAT's going on in favor of FACTS is that they are NOT measured OR validated subjectively especially since, as evidence supporting FACTS would mount, such FACTS become irrefutable.  WHILE I did witness that sometimes we tend to resist FACTS, over time, we would end up acknowledging such FACTS, sometimes NOT as our choice OR option BUT because that's the only way to go and no other way✅✅✅

WHERE will TRUTH get into the picture?  More often, it initially sprouts here and there as part of those hodge-podge of opinions WHICH, when expressed in good faith, are value judgments that expresses a feeling OR view.  True, alongside our human nature, those opinions may OR may NOT be supported by FACTS.  Instead, those OPINIONS rely on assumptions [Oooops, HOW many times I heard "DON'T ASSUME"?] and are exceedingly dependent on the perspective of those holding them❎❎❎

Our takeaway:  WHAT and WHERE we need to increase our awareness is the undeniable FACT that TRUTH is created by people to describe HOW things really are.  They are best described as a state of belief that is thought to represent a universal reality.  We decide WHAT TRUTHS we are willing to believe in.  And TRUTHS DON'T have to be logical OR verifiable.  They simply have to be shared and WHEN like-minded people agree as to a given reality of HOW things are, then TRUTH emerges.  YES dude, that's FACTS vs TRUTH!!!

Reading The Tea Leaves

 

READING THE TEA LEAVES is something I DIDN'T learn early in life.  NOT until I had that quite memorable very first tete-a-tete with our Managing Director @Goodyear.  For alignment, let us quote its technical meaning WHICH AI defines as the 'LITERAL PRACTICE OF TASSEOGRAPHY, A FORM OF DIVINATION WHERE YOU INTERPRET PATTERNS IN TEA LEAVES TO PREDICT THE FUTURE'.  BUT for our thread today, let's reference this as a metaphorical phrase for CAREFULLY EXAMINING SUBTLE CLUES TO PREDICT [OR at least PREEMPT] FUTURE developments.  BUT alas, a huge sizable chunk of us do miss out READING THE TEA LEAVES.  And to me, this is a huge miss because this hovers almost all facets of our daily lives💥💥💥

Frankly, READING THE TEA LEAVES is NO rocket science.  You DON'T even need to enroll even in a 101 online course.  Instead, this entails quite a list of little-little attributes and deeply embedded behaviors:

LIKE having that eye for detail, not missing a bit

LIKE reinforcing awareness of the world around you

LIKE practising focused reflection of things going on

For one's self-discovery, it behooves that we know fully well WHAT are those stuff that naturally draws you to, e.g. your dreams way back your childhood, the skills you enjoy using, OR even areas WHERE you feel a strong bond.  And then, piggy-back with mindful reflections LIKE asking yourself open-ended questions LIKE WHAT activities make me feel 'most alive'?  OR WHAT issues OR advocacies I am passionate💚💛💜

To reinforce your awareness of the environment enveloping you, observation is key BUT we are counselled to NEVER pass judgment.  Instead of immediately criticizing OR even praising, take your time to be incisive in observing subtle gestures, habits and communication styles.  WHEN do we READ TEA LEAVES?

WHEN in 'discovery mode', you need to understand a situation 

WHEN you want to explore establishing connection 

WHEN there's a potential disconnect you want to pre-empt

WHEN there's a brewing conflict that may turn from bad to worse

WHEN you're transitioning into a new community or company

Our takeaway:  Much as I learned the ropes to READ THE TEA LEAVES much later, I have to admit that READING THE TEA LEAVES helped me transition into new organizations as seamless as it can be.  And WHEN I got embroiled with 'hard ball' commercial negotiations, it was a huge help for me to remain incisive with the intangibles because WHEN gloves are OUT and fists are IN, it's nothing less than those no-holds-barred make-or-break situations.  YES dude, READING THE TEA LEAVES will be a huge help, promise😀😀😀

That Gap Between Our Potentials Versus Results

 

Supposedly, TRANSLATING OUR POTENTIALS INTO RESULTS should NOT be a talking point at all.  BUT the truth is, this is a topic overlooked more often than we thought.  WHY?  Plain and simple reason is that it's very rare for people to initiate a POST-MORTEM to assess the actual results vis-a-vis the potentials way before the results came about.  Problem is, it's our human nature to simply shrug off our shoulders and move to the next pit stop💚💛💜

My take here is that that's the 'GAP OF THE GAP'!  Frankly, missing out to initiate a POST-MORTEM is inexcusable.  And WHILE this is open to conjecture, let's think about it.  IF we're quite consistent enough in initiating a POST-MORTEM, that will go a long way to improve our future performance [even if it's another unique endeavor].  Frustratingly, I DON'T see a solid chunk of buy-in for POST-MORTEMs except in organizations WHERE this is a MUST-DO✅✅✅

The BIG MISS here are the UPSIDEs of POST MORTEMS.  In fact, enhancing one's capability is something that should be part of our 'continuous improvement' mindset.  Let's rattle off the most obvious reasons WHY we need POST-MORTEMs:

• To RIGHT THE WRONGS [obviously]
• To FINE-TUNE [even the correct actions taken]
• To REINFORCE the gains of previous successes
• To INSTILL the 'continuous improvement' mindset

WHAT IF we simply disavow POST-MORTEMS?  True that WON'T burn the house down BUT in the long run, we will be missing on the following:

THAT proactiveness to self-improve regardless if you did things correctly OR wrongly

THAT mindset to constantly self-improve

THAT discipline NOT to accept the status quo [UNLESS that's the only viable option left]

THAT window of opportunity to improve because that surfaces as a low hanging fruit for our easy picking after our completion of an endeavor😀😀😀

Our takeaway:  Let's take a step back as regards the most common reason POST-MORTEMS are NOT part of our regimen.  YES sireeeee, there is that prevailing school of thought that POST-MORTEMS are a waste of time and effort [based on the lame reasoning that there are more urgent and pressing stuff to be prioritized].  BUT dude, you gotta 'throw away' this mindset out the window because your responsibilities on your shoulder more than justifies for you to carry on with those PROACTIVE SELF-CHECKS with the end view to reduce the GAP BETWEEN OUR POTENTIALS VERSUS RESULTS, dude!!!

Life Is Never Cut And Dry

 

WHO says OR claims that LIFE IS CUT AND DRY! No Senor, nunca, never it was.  Truth is, life is so unpredictable, WHICH means, more often than NOT, it can be full of surprises, both good OR bad.  Without breaching confidentiality, first hand, I did bear witness to personal circumstances WHERE everything was shiny and dandy for a particular family NOT until something unpredictable hit them,triggering their direction towards skidding, no thanks to that unabated downturn.  On a different situation, I've known someone and his family WHO have been trying to let both ends meet until earlier this year, they surprised me by inviting me to their newly acquired home📗📙📘

Most common of recurring narratives revolve around health and finances.  Today, someone is so physically fit NOT until one day, we'd hear the sad news that that person is going through challenges in his health.  Another narrative is one WHO would have been struggling financially through the years BUT things become sadder WHEN I'd hear that that person's financial state has taken a serious downturn, from a bad to a worse situation.  At the workplace, I've known numerous workers so capable, skilled and professional enough to be promoted in organizations only to hear one day that he's scouring through the job market because he was part of company-wide layoffs💥💥💥

If we veer into relationships, it's an entirely different solar system, very much having its own universe.  Let's face it.  People come and go in our lives.  You might have a close partner OR spouse today BUT one day, either partner/spouse will decide to move away OR simply end a relationship.  And WHAT's the aftermath?  Obviously, gloom and uncertainty creeps in, and that's besides transitioning from normalcy to unpredictability.  And when natural disasters hit us hard, it could be a triple-whammy, causing destruction to properties and even not sparing precious lives😌😌😌

Two days back, I just drove for 12 hours and thankfully, nothing untoward and unpredictable hit my long drive along with my family.  Otherwise, it scares me much to think of thos tragic stories of families driving for a holiday only to end up with tragic accidents during such holidays.   SO HOW do we handle unpredictabilities?  As there is no DIY solution in handling or containing the impact caused by life's unpredictability, I DON'T get tired preaching the best practice being cascaded over and over again that let's endeavor to CONTROL WHAT WE CAN CONTROL.  Like, for natural disasters, we are reminded to keep and maintain a handy emergency bag containing the most basic emergency kits and that includes emergency flashlights, crackers and bottled water.  And that emergency bag needs to be refreshed every quarter or so [to ensure that the consummables remain good enough just in case something unfortunate hits us hard]❎❎❎

Our takeaway:  Overall, life is unpredictable and there's just NO way to know WHAT the future holds for us.   However, it is simply very essential for us to be quickly adaptable and flexible to cope with the unexpected turns [sometimes, they are 'downturns'] and twists in our life, giving us that 'wiggle room' to move forward [and NOT get stalled OR stuck].  Equally important, by having a manageable handle of our daily lives [even in the midsts of life's challenges], that should help us to continue LIVING IN THE PRESENT.  Horror stories I did bear witness were 'horrorific' enough BUT which makes me hesitate to share because of the dire consequences and outcomes arising from those unpredicted turns and twists.  At the end of the day, much as we continue to be nursing expectations, let us inject some "WHAT IF" assumptions to reinforce our Plan A, Plan B and even a Plan C [because LIFE IS NEVER CUT & DRY]😡😡😡

Are You Treading Above Water?

 

Even If You're Not Good Enough, Are You Treading Above Water?  BUT before we get bogged down with this exchange of 2-cents, with the handful of challenges you seem to be facing at hand, are you determined to stay afloat?  BUT if you have that very commendable mindset, are you confident enough that EVEN IF YOU'RE NOT good enough, you can still end up TREADING ABOVE WATER???

Psychologists in the medical field did recent studies WHEREIN, after understanding the plight of the subjects of the research [WHO were patients with critical illnesses], they were asked:  ARE YOU TREADING ABOVE WATER?  Apparently, many of them got hurt [or worse, offended] because to them, TREADING ABOVE WATER implied that they are NOT exerting enough in their situation and this is where the disconnect arises❎❎❎

To those patients, hearing TREADING ABOVE WATER took it NOT as an encouragement or complementary of their earnest efforts BUT the experts clarified that their intent was to point out just HOW much effort could seem pointless BUT in fact kept them from extricating themselves from their current plight.  Drawing parallelisms to my own plights in the past, little did I realize before that TREADING THE WATER would define much of my own life year-on-year☝☝☝

The thing is, although TREADING ABOVE WATER means that one's head is indeed above water, taking that approach can be likened to like a 'grab bag of negativity'.  This reminds me of that solitary struggle I went through many years back.  Through those years WHEN I hit rock bottom, I DIDN'T realize that WHEN you're TREADING ABOVE WATER, you're left with NOT even a minute to think if you're good enough💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  It's NOT even about WHETHER one is good OR not good enough, our everyday life does NOT deserve to have us simply treading above water.  WHAT IF it becomes 'high tide'?  WHAT IF a tsunami/tidal wave comes rushing?  WHAT IF a huge vessel passes by your rickety single-seater boat?  WHAT IF something cataclysmic hits you WHEN you are in the midst of life's challenges?  Point is, WHY should we aim that we be just TREADING ABOVE WATER?  WHY can't we be a full-body way above the waters?  For obvious reasons, we need more than just enough buffer WHEN things turn awry.  WHY go for hair-line gaps between surviving OR hitting that cul de sac?  EVEN IF YOU'RE NOT GOOD ENOUGH, ARE YOU JUST TREADING ABOVE WATER, dude😡😡😡

Hope For The Best, Expect For The Worst!

 

HOPE FOR THE BEST, EXPECT FOR THE WORST! And in real life, expect that REALITY WILL LAND SOMEWHERE IN THE MIDDLE.  Rightfully, this is NOT a discussion point at all BUT HOW often do we continue to be brimming with optimism, still expecting a better than good outcome, all because we're hoping for the best?  YES I do hear you, it seems our thread for today sounds kind of boring?  Of course, because we've heard this phrase OR a version of it most likely countless times.  YES, because it is one of the most recognized and adapted quotes in fact📗📙📘

BUT to be frank about it, it's just NOT good advice though.  And to be brutally frank, me thinks that at least half of it is NOT good advice.  And WHEN one day I did realize the very negative impact on my mindset, I told myself [deep within] to avoid ever let my lips utter it again.  Oh yes, kind of telling myself that my lips are sealed, ouch.  BUT to be honest, I DON'T have an aversion to every bit in that phrase❎❎❎

In fact, I wholeheartedly believe in it as I am a born optimist [as I believe in the power of HOPE so much to a point that that optimism has constantly kept me inspired.  BUT let's take a reality check.  Having HOPE itself is NOT always easy.  It's NOT even served on a platter for one's taking.  Today, we are bombarded with news and images of wars, violence, crime, oh yes, even that dreaded terrorism.  And lately, to paint a murkier picture of things, severe economic hardships [especially in Africa] and the endless natural disasters that have become the 'breaking news' almost everywhere💥💥💥

Much as we can keep talking BUT everything will end up with our mindset, a not so obvious fact here is that a thriving mindset acknowledges the 'WORST' much as it hopes for the 'BEST'.  We DON'T need to look farther than our very own.  A person WHO sees in him as a 'work-in-progress' will likely evolve and grow, inching its way towards one's cherished HOPE.  And studies show that they present that personal sense of empowerment💚💛💜

Our takeaway:  If there's one thing I have always embraced, it is the fact that our mind is a damn powerful tool.  Somehow, that natural tendency of an untrained mind, entrenched in survival, can flip either way BUT in real life, even the experts confirm that it will tilt more likely towards negative experiences than on positive ones.  YES, they coined it as NEGATIVITY BIAS.  And I have to admit, I have NOT been immune to that bias.  Our fix?  Back to our very mindset, dude.  Much as our spiels at home, at work and even at competitions all revolve around optimism, YES, we can continue those traditional rah-rah-rahs BUT we need to prepare for a Plan B WHEN Plan A falls off OR even a Plan C WHEN Plan B goes down the drain as well, ouch😡😡😡

Are You A Dime A Dozen?

 

ARE YOU A DIME A DOZEN?  Oh Oh, BTW, that question is NOT meant to be confrontational OR aggressive.  It's just a casual question that's worth relating to our everyday lives.  If at all, blame it on me for following the NBA's goings-on as 'star' players are angling for ultra huge contracts each time there is that slightest opportunity to extend OR renew [even a live, existing contract].  The question is, is this OR that person A DIME A DOZEN???

BEEN THERE, HAD THAT.  In one of my previous hirings in India, I really invested my time going through the candidates and finally, I zeroed-in on the candidate I'd like to onboard.  And then the J.O. [Job Offer] phase kicked in.  And NOT to bad-mouth Indians, BUT it's common practice there for them to share with you records of every penny they're receiving and that includes the list of employee perks and benefits.  And before you could heave a sigh of relief, before I knew it, I would reach that iteration stage WHEREIN I would run the numbers, doing a balancing act to ensure I can lure my shortlisted candidate without 'breaking the bank', else I'll go through the 'eye of the CFO's needle', ouch😗😗😗

Now, back to the very core of our thread.  Are you a DIME A DOZEN?  Nothing wrong though about it BUT frankly, if we want to stand out from that mamooth crowd out there, absolutely we CAN'T etch our mark by just being a DIME A DOZEN.  In the rough and tumble world of business and commerce, it all boils down to one's COMPETITIVE ADVANTAGE.  Simply put, WHAT is it can you offer that would significantly and materially differentiate one from competition?  And it's NO different in our personal lives, dude💥💥💥

Please DON'T get me wrong but this DIME A DOZEN thing sprouts as early as our school days way back.  Every school year, with new teachers, do we expect them to have a good impression of our own selves within the first few weeks of the academic term?  Of course, down the road, this and that teacher will remember your name, BUT probably that's inspite the fact that you or me myself are a DIME A DOZEN, which DOESN'T augur well if our ultimate goal is to etch our mark to the stakeholders, to the bosses, to the mentors.  I might sound like a broken vinyl record BUT as the old cliche goes, IF YOU AIM FOR THE SKY, IF YOU FAIL, YOU'LL FALL ON THE TREETOP.  IF YOU FAIL, YOU'LL FALL ON THE GROUND, ouch😡😡😡

Our takeaway:  Let's NOT hold the punches.  Wharever endeavor we do get engaged, let's give it all, pour it out.  While at the end of the day, we may have shortfalls in our actual performances versus WHAT we envisioned, bottomline is, we should be proud enough of ourselves if we have given every endeavor our best shot, even WHEN at times we seem to be running against the tide, WHEN the cards seem stacked against our favor.  So, do we want to remain as a DIME A DOZEN, dude???