Awareness Is That 'LOW HANGING FRUIT', After All!

 

Almost throughout our years, we were reared and schooled to be taught with the foundations and rudiments of knowledge because, as the old school says, that will lead and bring us to greater heights.  No doubt about it, that is rightfully true.  BUT, without nitpicking, I would opine that even sans the adequacy of one's foundational knowledge, WHAT becomes more telling and compelling is AWARENESS itself.  Let me toss up this giveaway bonus question.  HOW much time and effort will we need to  achieve one's level of AWARENESS when 'juxtapositioned' to that level of acquiring all the necessary and adequate knowledge and information?  Likely, there is a huge divide there considering that AWARENESS is often up for our picking, sometimes dangling and swaying right in front our nose, seriously💚💛💜

Simply put, AWARENESS is NOT even like rocket science WHERE you need to sweat it out.  Instead, AWARENESS can be as simple as A-B-C and 1-2-3 because as it is, it is right there, sticking out and standing out.  The onus is upon us to recognize that that thing does exist at that moment.  And that's the big elephant more often looming right behind our back and worse, at times, we seem to be mimicking that big elephant in the room❗❗❗

I've witnessed people getting off-tracked NOT because of their mediocrity BUT all simply because of their huge miss when it comes to AWARENESS.  Reality is, AWARENESS is all-encompassing.  It could be AWARENESS of your community, your domestic situation, your workplace environment, your business situation and even the unique standings of your relationships cutting across and beyond one's immediate families, workplace and the like.  Take away AWARENESS from the equation, you are likely having a recipe for a looming failure if NOT disaster❎❎❎

WHAT IF we ignore embracing AWARENESS?  This has serious ramifications because, first off, that positions oneself to a spot that is NOT within the realm of reality, of what is the truth and factual.  I commiserate with people I've come to know up close simply because there was something insufficient OR lacking in their AWARENESS of the situation they were in.  And that was another recipe for disaster in the making, so to speak💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  WHILE life is NOT really a 'bed of roses', a lot of those challenges we would seem to struggle can be traced back to our inability to reinforce our AWARENESS of things.  BTW, reinforcing our AWARENESS does NOT need any resources, e.g. money OR time but instead, it is part of our character and discipline in life that plays a huge part in flipping the results to either the favorable or unfavorable side.  Sadly, I've witnessed enough failures in life, all because the person's AWARENESS level was way below the threshold level for him to eke things out.  But the sadder part in those fumbling acts is the fact that the people who ended up fumbling and stumbling were at the right place at the right time.  And if there was a gaping hole they fell through, it's that need for them to grab that LOW HANGING FRUIT, right on their face😡😡😡

When Things Are In Turmoil

 

When THINGS ARE IN TURMOIL, WHAT happens next?  Good question, dude.  And WHILE scenarios can run through the 360 degrees of probabilities, let's KISS [Keep It Simple, s____] dude.  It's either we accept things as they are OR reject and walk away OR remain oblivious and just ignore AS IF nothing seems to be bothering you, ouch [WHICH is regrettable because that is akin for one to refuse to accept the reality one is facing.  And this is WHEN things really complicate because for every setting, there are, at the very least, three probabilities that may just spring up.  To WHICH path OR road you will take, it will be your 'judgment call' [BUT we hope that you did endeavor to come up with your 'best judgment' dude💚💛💜

I remember those volatile times WHEN I transitioned from the academe over to the workplace.  I [wrongly] thought that things would be seamless, just akin to crossing the street [safely enough after going through the motions of stop, look and listen.  BUT alas, I was proven wrong during those times❎❎❎

WHILE I was like a fragile chick at that time with wet ears to boot, I did notice that my situation during that time was rolling up before my eyes almost on a recurring basis all over the place.  LIKE WHEN folks are so obsessed with the future?  And WHILE, per se, there is nothing wrong with it, once we start getting pulled with that unrelenting obsessions over the UNKNOWNs in the future, the die is cast.  You can end up locked-in BUT locked-out.  Without being pessimistic, extricating oneself once we're in the doldrums is a tough act to replicate across.  So, all along, the recurring and common culprit here are the UNKNOWNs of the future.  BUT the compounded question is, HOW much and HOW far can we influence OR shape up the UNKNOWNs of futures???

Over the years, I stumbled across very compelling spiels that somehow helped me get over those 'humps'.  LIKE letting go of CONTROL.  In the past, I easily and quickly succumbed to that CONTROLLING habit, which I [wrongly thought then as a-ok.  And you might ask, HOW did that CONTROLLING habit spring out from within me?  I realized that, without fault-finding, I had more of those memorable experiences WHERE most of the time, I had my way akin to the stars aligning in my favor.  Unfortunately, that led me to evolve into that character-building that CONTROLLING is the way to go.   WHAT led me to that mindset?  I'll blame my string of successes in the past WHERE often times, I had my way💧💧💧

Our takeaway:  One hard but enduring lesson I picked up through those times in turmoil is that accepting things is the way to go towards achieving that [sometimes] elusive INNER PEACE.  Unless we reach to a point where we unshackle ourselves from being locked-in and locked-out WHILE living in TURMOIL, that TURMOIL can reach a boiling point WHERE we will be hard pressed to handle things.  WHATEVER kind of circumstances prevailing into your respective situations, it is endeavoring to embrace that INNER PEACE that will leave us to the very doorstep that will lead us a step outside that 'war room' where survival becomes the solitary goal.  But hey, WHEN THINGS ARE IN TURMOIL, generally, things are NOT bad as it seems NOT until we mishandle things and getting 'hostaged' by the UNKNOWNs of the future, ouch😡😡😡

Our BOUNDARIES In Life

 

Supposedly, we DON'T need to spend even a minute just to cover about BOUNDARIES but the reality is that, BOUNDARIES are NOT far different from those lines we sometimes draw on the sand.  Either they seem seamless OR they seem to be the least important stuff to talk about.  BUT can we agree that we all know the feeling of having someone CROSS OUR BOUNDARIES☝☝☝

Everyone of us can recall those instances WHEN our BOUNDARIES got CROSSED.  That mixed feeling of anger and surprise that leads you to a must-do decision, WHETHER  you call them on it OR do you just let it go?  YES, that kind of experience is both common and unpleasant and the bad news is, it's going to be a factor throughout our whole life.  Having good BOUNDARIES is indeed an integral part for us to live a good life, and YES we will be called on to manage our BOUNDARIES💥💥💥

Before we get drawn into murkier discussions, let us have an alignment by agreeing WHAT BOUNDARIES are, after all.  BOUNDARIES are our needs, our expectations, things that will keep us safe and sane in our relationship with both our own self and others.  Obviously, there are some pretty obvious BOUNDARIES, for instance, laws are BOUNDARIES.  YES, there are lots of different types of BOUNDARIES in relationships and with our own self.  Some of them we're familiar with👌👌👌

Physical BOUNDARIES.  Emotional. Time.  Relationship.  Intellectual. Financial.  Device. There are, of course, so many more types of BOUNDARIES than all these, and as you're working on creating your own BOUNDARIES, it's worth considering WHICH areas you feel strong in, and WHICH could use some shoring up.  BTW, WHY do we let people cross our BOUNDARIES [even if they are outliers]?  And NOT so obvious on the surface are the hidden consequences of doing so.  Even though BOUNDARIES are critical for living a good life, it can still be tempting to let it slide in❎❎❎

Our takeaway:  Enforcing BOUNDARIES can indeed be hard if you have a 'BOUNDARY BLUEPRINT that says BOUNDARIES are bad, and that enforcing them is being kind of pushy OR worse, one gets tagged as unkind.  That BOUNDARY BLUEPRINT is a term from experts for our 'internal map' and sometimes, elements in that form from explicit lessons about BOUNDARIES LIKE, 'Be a good girl' OR 'Don't make a fuss' WHILE other times the BOUNDARIES we develop to protect ourselves from those feelings of unworthiness, danger OR even a lack of belonging.  Bottomless, SETTING BOUNDARIES is all about awareness and practice.  And WHILE that may sound like a lot of work just to get into situations that might lead you into conflict, let's agree that there will always be consequences to whatever choice you make with your BOUNDARIES!!!

Sometimes, NOT Knowing Is NOT Good

 

Sometimes, NOT Knowing Is NOT Good.  Heard this short story from China's richest man:  If you put bananas and money in front of monkeys, the monkeys will choose bananas because they DON'T know that money can buy a lot of bananas.  In fact, even as we speak now, if people are offered work or business, many will STILL choose work because most of us [and that included me in the past, ouch] are NOT too conscious enough that business can make more money than being a plain salaried person.  This is NOT even a hit OR miss kind of thing.  On the other hand, the difference between these analogies are as clear as night and day OR the skies and the ground.  Ironically, many of us [and I was one of those, in the past] are not too conscious that NOT knowing is NOT good💚💜💛

That explains WHY there is a solitary lighthouse standing out there at the tip of a peninsula because in the cover of darkness, our viewfinder becomes so limited and constrained to the extent that, knock on wood, sometimes tragic incidents even occur, all because of that.  BUT alas, in real life, there is NO lighthouse that constantly stands right within our line of sigh, ugghhh📗📙📘

Verily true, many times we would simply shrug off our shoulders and retort back, DOES IT MATTER [WHEN we've been through the gauntlet many times and here we are, STILL firmly standing on the ground?].  Indeed true.  BUT WHAT we sometimes miss out here is that that COMPOUNDING factor.  Unlike those bank deposit interests that keep compounding [to our benefit], those downsides in life have their fair share of that COMPOUNDING factor and before we know it, that stuff we DIDN'T know then hardly mattered because it WON'T even cause a dent, NOT until one day, our car seemed to be peppered with multiples of those small dents💧💧💧

Oh yes, I grabbed this poster somewhere because the word 'KNOW' seems obscured and that tempts me to draw that parallelism with the fact, often times, WHAT we DON'T know hardly matters because as that old cliche goes, NOT knowing rarely, if at all, hurts [NOT until you fall down with your face flat, with all those 'black and blues'.  And this is the miss we're literally missing out.  WHY?  again, we go back to that age-old lesson WHICH says that WHAT we DON'T know DOESN'T hurt [WHICH I agree for the most part] BUT WHAT about those ramifications and consequences as a result of MISSING OUT WHAT we DIDN'T know, ouch💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  A very recent clinical research claims that humans tend to choose enduring physical pain over that 'PAIN OF NOT KNOWING' WHEN it comes to finding out useless information faster.  YES, that 'NEED TO KNOW' is NOT limited to stuff like lottery WHERE it is equally obvious in other situations akin to NOT knowing the final score of a football match OR the ending of a book WHICH DOESN'T interest us much anyways.  NOT until kabooom, those ramifications of NOT KNOWING IS NOT GOOD😡😡😡

Can We Be Happier MORE OFTEN?

 

Can We Be Happier MORE OFTEN?  Is this a silly question?  YES it may seem so BUT WHY DON'T we lurk around.  ISN'T it a fact that there is a pattern that's shaping up WHERE there are more narratives of increasing numbers of UNHAPPINESS?  Of course, UNHAPPINESS itself is very subjective.  One may feel UNHAPPY with his/her current situation BUT try replicating that exact situation to someone else, we will likely witness a totally different feeling of HAPPINESS that may even be intertwined with that sense of gratefulness💚💛💜

So, probably, one of the most perplexing question now is that UNHAPPINESS mystery.  WHAT pushes us towards that brink of UNHAPPINESS?  WHICH reminds me of this folklore about a man WHO felt alone.  He craved for relationships, friendships, and social interaction.  He kind of wanted his life to be like that beer commercial, showing an executive's frenetic schedules for the day, heavily loaded at work, then off to meeting friends after work, and over to music festivals over the weekend, parties and those social engagements.  Everything seems so A-ok EXCEPT that only his life WASN'T anything like that💧💧💧

BUT alas, after all those back-to-back engagements, he felt he was living a hollowed and empty life.  At home, either he would watch TV or end up with his smart phone.  OH yes, he tried walking around all by himself UNTIL he realizes, he's back on his smart phone, scrolling endlessly, looking for people to connect with BUT that made him feel needy and kind of desperate in the eyes of others.  Part of him wanted to be the guy with lots of friends BUT another part of himself wanted to stay home, all by himself.  Alas, that conflict resulted in quite a bit of anxiety.  He then ended up feeling UNHAPPY with his life💥💥💥

Maybe you would know someone with this similar narrative?  YES, this is a common phenomenon many of us would experience in our lives.  Psychologists claim that it's a clash between WHAT we think we should want and WHAT we actually want [and it can be a huge source of UNHAPPINESS, ouch].  And if left alone, without our own awareness, we can go our whole lives with this UNHAPPINESS!!!

Our takeaway:  As the old cliche goes, LIFE IS SHORT.  WHAT better time than NOW for us to relish NOT just life itself BUT that level of HAPPINESS which we deserve.  Enough of those lofty idealisms that often times, are too good to be true.  Let's have both our feet stand as solid as possible on the ground, accept and embrace everything that's positive and have that sense of gratefulness for us to be HAPPIER MORE OFTEN, please😍😍😍

Stop Saying 'YES' To Everyone & Everything

 

If I blurt out a blanket statement like STOP SAYING 'YES' TO EVERYONE & EVERYTHING, I have to admit that I may be mistaken for sheer braggadocio because that's easier said than done, right?  HOW can a child who keeps kowtowing his parent NOT say YES?  HOW can a student NOT say YES WHEN his academic professor assigns other random tasks for him [even to his detriment]?  And if you're into sales and marketing, HOW can you NOT say YES WHEN your potential customer [for a juicy contract] keeps asking for multiple FOCs [free of charge] service OR product provisions?  And if you are a newly onboarded employee, HOW can you NOT say YES to your boss WHO dumps this and that task to you right on your Day-1?  Just one too many realities in life WHERE it seems we are hapless and helpless NOT to say YES TO EVERYONE & EVERYTHING💚💛💜

I remember by Day-1 at Shell where I had the first taste of a blue-chip workplace and by noon time, our Dutch expat boss invited me for lunch.  To my personal shock, he brought me over to his favorite nightlife haunt, a nearby chic club WHERE, even with the blistering heat at noon time, we were in that cool club having our lunch while we were entertained on stage by the club's 'stars'.  I'm NOT giving any excuses here BUT at that moment in time, my Day-1 @Shell, HOW CAN I NOT SAY 'YES' [and that's to my boss at that time]???

Obviously, there are tons of realities in life WHICH are hardly part of the pre-scripted narratives in life.  NOT to besmirch our school and academic mentors [and even our immediate families], as we were raised up from childhood, for a thousand times, we were taught to say YES to the elders.  And rightfully, there's nothing wrong with that, per se, except that that's simply 'old school', period.  And I'd admit that that was more prevalent especially in the third world where people were more culture-centric compared to the first world people WHO were more opinionated and WHO were more vocal and frank to a point that they often claimed being autonomous even to those 'seniors' or authorities either in government, school OR organizations💧💧💧

Admittedly, I used to SAY TO EVERYTHING!  Even WHEN I migrated to Singapore, things just turned from bad to worse because if prior to migrating, I was saying YES 70% of the time, WHEN I became a naturalized Singapore citizen, I realized I was saying YES more than 70% of the time.  NO excuses.  NO alibis.  I lost the handle of things during those times BUT before things could have turned from worse to worst, I realized that that was the final call, the 'clarion call' for me to shape up and realize WHAT's right and WHAT's not💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  If I have a so obvious REALIZATION in life, it's that giveaway fact that REALIZATIONs will always happen post a situation OR incident.  You just CAN'T expect to push the cart ahead of the horse.  BUT the glimmer of hope here is that, if we can share even a simple insight like this, that REALIZATION can be averted if we're to raise our self-awareness that you CAN'T be flagged down to say NO when, in good faith, your conscience and judgment tells you that you are on the right side for saying NO regardless WHO you are interacting OR engaging to.  YES dude, STOP SAYING 'YES' to everyone and everything😡😡😡

Stretching Yourself Way Too Far?

 

In Channelnewsasia sourced from Rome, Austrian extreme sports pioneer Felix Baumgartner, famed for his record-breaking 2012 skydive from the edge of space, died almost two months ago as he lost control of his motorised paraglider WHILE flying over Porto Sant'Elpidio in Italy.  The reason or cause for the accident was unclear BUT we WON'T delve into that.  Instead, I picked up a thread here, our human tendency to 'over stretch' ourselves, sometimes it's mind-boggling😟😟😟

STRETCHING OURSELF WAY TOO FAR is often our very own fault.  Please DON'T get me wrong.  I am NOT aghast and NOT against people showing their wares and expertise for the simple reason that that's their field, their 'cup of tea'.  I remember watching the Netflix documentary WHEN Alex Honnold was able to successfully scale the 1,667-foot Taipe 101 skycraper in Taiwan without ropes, harnesses OR even a safety gear👌👌👌

Imagine for a moment that you are working in an office.  Your typical 9 to 5 job, your own cubicle along with your departmental tasks.  You arrive into work optimistic and ready to take on the day.  You start working WHEN suddenly, your boss asks you to take on an additional assignment.  You know that you have a lot on your plate [an overflowing plate likely, ouch] BUT you DON'T want to just disappoint your boss [OR is it your kind of weak character WHEN you just CAN'T say NO to the bosses.  Seriously💥💥💥

BUT that's NOT the end-of-story even as you went through all the tasks throughout the day even as several of your work colleagues start approaching you as well, each one asking for HELP.  And each time they ask for HELP, you start to think about HOW much Xtra work you're doing, BUT you simply smile and agree to take it on, as you DON'T want to let anyone down.  A week passes and you notice that you're going to work less and less enthused. Suddenly your boss comes up and practically drags you to an adhoc 10:00 AM meeting❎❎❎

Our takeaway:  Without unduly speculating, I can safely guess that stress will begin to mount and exacerbate, then multiple deadlines are creeping and approaching.  Going through multiple environments which gave me those real-life experiences that were life-changing at times, I realized [over and over again] that even if you have the best intentions and your endeavors are all apprached in good faith, STRETCHING YOURSELF WAY TOO FAR will be more inimical than beneficial even within the short-term.  It may be true that you are exerting your darn best to 'deliver the goods' so to speak BUT when we're STRETCHING WAY TOO FAR, it will do more harm than good😡😡😡

Having A Crappy Day?

 

HOW often do you end up with CRAPPY DAYS?  Surely, it's NOT that often, right?  BUT I can bet absolutely that from time to time, you would end up at the receiving end on those CRAPPY DAYS, right?  And NOT to anyone's surprise, during those CRAPPY DAYS, either our day becomes chaotic OR messy OR at worst, we end up unproductive that day, missing to get things done for our priorities for that day.  BUT the recurring question I would hear is this:  CAN we avert OR avoid those CRAPPY days.  I'd quickly blurt, YES and NO.  YES by a long long long shot.  NO, because CRAPPY DAYS do happen and you've got to handle it, regardless of the eventual outcomes for that day💚💛💜

Let me thread back how I did weather those CRAPPY DAYS.  First off, I would always CHECK-IN.  Simply put, I accepted that that day will be a CRAPPY DAY and I am NOT that powerful enough to turn things around by 360 degrees [OR even by a 180 degrees].  By that CHECK-IN, I reset things from within me at least for that day💥💥💥

NEXT logical step, I will take immediate action to revisit my ACTION PLAN + PRIORITIES for that day.  Likely, if I pre-set 5 PRIORITIES, at best, I might be able to accomplish 2-3 PRIORITIES.  That's being realistic and pragmatic.  BUT obviously, revisiting your plan and priorities for that day [right at ZERO-HOUR] is a tough act to do.  Few times I attempted in the past and I did flop and fail.  WHY?  My own post-mortem tells me that during those times, I got rattled and ended somewhat in a 'state of panic', unfortunately.  BUT I learnt my lessons the hard way and the next times I ended up in those situations, I kept reminding myself to KEEP COOL and COMPOSED even during those times❗❗❗

Here's a tough call to make.  IF you anticipate the consequences and impact of your tweaking and changes for that day, you need to reassess how far it will impact others [and if it does, it behooves that you give that/those persons a heads-up and reset their expectations [obviously explaining your challenges for that day]].  Worst mistake we can make is tweak and change our priorities, oblivious of the consequences that will be deemed impactful to other people.  The last thing you want to end up is causing damages and post that damage, you will end up scampering to do that unnecessary damage control.  That's TOO LITTLE, TOO LATE, if you may❎❎❎

Our takeaway:  YES dude, in more CRAPPY DAYS than you could ever anticipate, we may NOT be super humans BUT if you are focused to turn things around, YES dude, you can still turn things around, albeit, it will likely take a lot more tons of effort and often times, some trade-offs, some quid pro quo, some 'balancing acts' to ascertain WHICH scenario you will end up less worse OR much better off.  NOT to scare our readership, many times I did bear witness to people WHO, WHEN they realized they had a CRAPPY DAY, they simply gave up and just abandoned all things as a lost cause.  Ouch, that's NOT the way to handle when HAVING A CRAPPY DAY😡😡😡

Health Is A LUXURY [More Than The Million Problems You're Bothered]!

 

YES YES yowwww, HEALTH IS A LUXURY [more than the millions of problems you're quite bothered] !@#$%? True, our life is kind of peppered with those countless [and at times endless and often overwhelming] challenges a.k.a. problems  [for most of us.  And it creeps way beyond the whole nine yards, from our financial woes to our children's school concerns and over to our relationship struggles [e.g. with IN-LAWS, IN-LAWS and IN-LAWS ouch].  BUT again, we are being coaxed and cautioned that we need to increase our consciousness and awareness that there is ONLY one problem we got to face head-on [and resolve it, where possible] and that's our HEALTH no less because that is the LUXURY we can't miss out in life, in fact📗📙📘

All along, with social media more often lording it over our daily lives, where we've been probably subscribing and following in IG, Meta FB and all those social feeds, we're bombarded [and sometimes buried under the bushel of oblivion] with that "MILLION PROBLEM" reality.  And NOT to downplay those stuff, it's true they've got to be fixed and resolved BUT there's a HUGE MISS and it is the fact that our priorities get turned upside down, NO thanks to that "MILLION PROBLEM" reality because in the very first place, we should NOT get 'hostaged' by it because there's something that's zillions of times much MORE important, MORE impactful and at times, MORE urgent [IF and WHEN, we got hit with 'it']💚💛💜

This is where we are being egged to consider that 'PERSPECTIVE SHIFT' wherein, instead of us getting so flummoxed with that "MILLION PROBLEM" reality, prioritizing HEALTH  [via CONSISTENT rest, nutrition and exercise] will pave the way for us for us to have a much better perspective given the tons of difficulties in life.  That recent Covid-19 Pandemic was like a rude awakening for mankind.  As the big majority were penny-conscious and were savings-focused, I heard 'horror' stories WHERE savings for a lifetime were wiped up WHEN health issues hit them, ouch💥💥💥

I've heard a huge throng of folks playing devil's advocate, declaring that every problem has a solution, WHICH IS A FACT!  And that there is NO problem without a solution, OBVIOUSLY!  BUT here's the game-changing question WHICH you might hear in the Miss Universe Pageant Finals Q&A:  HOW WILL YOU PRIORITIZE fixing and solving all your problems?  Of course, this is a giveaway and bonus question because, hands down,  it's got to be fixing HEALTH issues❗❗❗

Our takeaway:  I WON'T get tired blurting that age-old cliche HEALTH IS WEALTH.  And that's the kind of WEALTH that is more and most valued way over any of our properties and monies, business and investments.  Even rolling them all up together may be a drop in the bucket [EXCEPT maybe if you're in the big league of the Elon Musks and Paul Zuckerbergs].  BUT those folks sum up to less than a single drop of water across the ocean's vastness.  Here's the take then.  You have every inherent right to manage your life's priorities BUT please 'bump up' and 'push up' HEALTH up there in the totem pole because burying it deep down your priority list will be one of the most regrettable  things TO DO BUT NEVER actioned.  YES dude, HEALTH IS A LIXURY [More than the Million Problems you're bothered]😡😡😡

Gift-wrapping In Life a.k.a. Sugar-coating

 

GIFT-WRAPPING IN LIFE?  a.k.a. sugar-coating.  Per se, GIFT-WRAPPING OR SUGAR-COATING is generally NOT a wrong thing to do.  NOT to be defensive when we get wronged by people WHO do SUGAR-COAT, more often than not, people do SUGAR-COAT for reasons they [personally] feel makes them right for doing so.  LIKE people with fear of conflict, some people worry telling the truth as it may next trigger an argument OR a conflict!@#$%?

WHAT I witnessed more often is that some of us are apprehensive hurting someone's self-esteem OR worse, straining OR even eventually causing a relationship to collapse.  There were outlier narratives I did witness wherein people simply prefer to be liked than be viewed as either harsh OR overly critical, reasons that often remain unspoken BUT which can end up impactful at the very least, to oneself, as effectively, he does NOT come out to be seriously honest up front to himself.  As the old cliche goes, THE END DOES NOT JUSTIFY THE MEANS❎❎❎

WHEN is GIFT-WRAPPING OR SUGAR-COATING at its worst to happen?  Tough call.  YES, WHEN feedback is needed OR solicited and we end up sharing SUGAR-COATED feedback, imagine it's akin to imparting a message that at its best is a half-truth OR at its worst, it comes out as a falsehood and fabrication all rolled into one.  Once we SUGAR-COAT feedback, it's akin to burying the lead underneath a pile of niceties, so much so that the main message is NOT effectively delivered OR imparted.  Feedback sandwiches are one example of SUGARGOATING feedback, WHICH is no less wrong.  Imagine we want to avoid that short-term discomfort of having a conversation BUT aware enough that an honest-to-goodness conversation  must happen💧💧💧

End-result of SUGAR-COATING feedback?  True, it still results in feedback happening, kind of, BUT it happens in an ineffective manner, that it becomes even worse than avoiding the feedback entirely.  And WHY will it be wose?  Because the person delivering that SUGAR-COATED feedback tends to have that illusion that the feedback of conversation took place WHEREAS the person on the receiving end did NOT actually receive the message💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  Surely, there are those obvious underlying reasons WHY SUGAR-COATING of feedback does happen BUT WHAT is NOT becoming so apparent is that it makes it difficult for a leader to speak up and in the end, SUGAR-COATING makes it difficult and at times nearly impossible for anyone to course correct, if at all.  YES, frankly, SUGAR-COATING feedback can lead to frustration and even confusion on both sides.  So, WHY get into GIFT-WRAPPING and SUGAR-COATING😡😡😡