When The Stars Align

When The Stars Align

Through the years, psychologists have consistently confirmed in their studies the one factor which most accurately predicts increased feelings of satisfaction in people's lives is a SENSE OF PURPOSE and conversely, the lack of it equally accurately predicts the opposite and leads to DEPRESSION, HOPELESSNESS and even ANXIETY.  And according to these experts, it DOESN'T matter what that SENSE OF PURPOSE is, merely that it is.  For one person, maybe it's all about caretaking for aging parents.  That kind of unique circumstance could lead one to achieve seemingly SUPERHUMAN feats like carrying her parents up a long flight of stairs despite enduring severe back problems.  And this leads us all to it When The Stars Align⏳⏳⏳
 

For another fellow, it could be getting immersed in art or picking up a hobby one longed for a long time.  And as long as there is something before us, it seems something to work toward that has meaning to us, regardless whether it has meaning to anyone else or NOT, as our lives will certainly NEVER be perfect, but they will be vastly better than they would be otherwise.  In short, PURPOSE makes life worth living and the absence of it, in my humble opinion, would be our worst undoing💎💎💎

So, in the vastness of the solar system, how do we pull this off when the stars align?  First things first, we must accept things as they are and NOT as we wish them to be.  By this, I DON'T mean that we should like the way things are BUT instead, NOT liking the way things are is a great reason to put your mind to changing them.  Again, that leads us to when the stars align💊💊💊

Having said this, we need to be realistic enough about the way things are so that we can create our goals that are then achievable as compared to setting ideal goals.  HOW?  First off, accept your limitations.  If you're NOT into physically strenuous activities, then DON'T hope to be a gym coach.  That becomes essential because NOT only that you're guaranteeing your failure if you choose to take that path📌📌📌

Furthermore, we need to establish what we really value.  Then we can align our VALUES with all sorts of things but this is something NOT to be dictated by anyone else BUT you yourself.  To translate our focus when the stars align, we got to enact our values to come up with concrete steps aligned with our goal and PURPOSE IN LIFE and then commit to it especially when the stars align❗❗❗

DON'T Wait To Be Ready

DON'T Wait To Be Ready

We'll hear this OVER and OVER again.  Be READY.  Get READY.  Gotta be READY.  BUT hey, DON'T Wait To Be Ready.  That's our dilemma.  From our growing up years, our parents would always put the impetus of getting READY in life [which is fine as a motherhood statement] but to live your daily life, let us throw out in the window that you gotta be READY before plunging💎💎💎

To quote Jensen Siaw, one of Asia's popular performance coach and motivational speaker, 
"DON'T WAIT UNTIL YOU ARE READY TO TAKE ACTION.  INSTEAD, TAKE ACTION TO BE READY" I think that is well said and that hits the nail right on its head.  Because we grew up under the very nose of our parents, guiding us to BE READY and GET READY, by the time we were unleashed, no one's to blame if we got molded, disciplined and trained that READINESS is the key.   And per se, that's very true, READINESS is non-negotiable but unfortunately, that READINESS aspect tends to hold us back⏳⏳⏳

Oh, technology is to be partly blamed as well because we got so used to this "DOWNLOADING.  PLEASE WAIT" but hey in life, we're NOT talking about technology and internet.  It's our very own manual way of living and leading our life.  So, please REBOOT & RESET so that that DOWNLOADING message gets erased from your mindset

That signage "YOU AREN'T READY", I'm thankful I didn't come across that.  ELSE, I would have NOT succeeded on the goals I did set for myself.  ELSE, I would have NOT taken the plunge by migrating to Singapore at a time when I knew no one else who could have guided me in my NEXT STEPS there.  ELSE, I would have NOT those meaningful stints with global and Fortune 500's organizations.  ELSE, I would have NOT have been exposed to the rich cultures across💊💊💊

IF at all, READINESS applies the most to sportsmen preparing for a fight [think of Floyd Mayweather in Boxing, Usain Bolt in track and field and Michael Phelps in swimming].  Other than competitive events, let's just take the plunge way before we reach out 100% READINESS.  Just DON'T WAIT TO BE READY✅✅✅

NEVER Wait For The Beginning Of The End

NEVER Wait For The Beginning Of The End

Carlos Ghosn, the former Chairman & CEO of Nissan-Renault Alliance was once quoted that: NEVER wait for the beginning of the end and I just can't agree less than that.  Except for catastrophic events [God forbid] like natural calamities, accidents and terrorism,  all other turn of events in our life just didn't pop-up like that 'Big Bang Theory'.  Somewhere somehow in the not so distant past, you could and should have detected the beginning ff the end💎💎💎

Take breakups of relationships.  99.99% of it were not plotted to [sadly] end that way, and sometimes ending acrimoniously.  Ironically, 99.99% of relationships start off all shining and dandy.  BUT the most perplexing question is as to WHY many of us still end up kinda in a state of shock when it happens.  Simple answer is:  We ignored the initial arguments that worsened into tiffs and escalating into full-blown quarrels till 'bridges got burned'💊💊💊

We can easily compare all these to our laptop woes [both for students and office workers ever since we got hit with that dreaded pandemic.  99.99% of laptops will NOT breakdown instantly.  Instead, there will be tell-tale signs and most of which seem incognito or alarming enough but we humans should be DISCERNING with every minute detail.  DON'T even give that LAME EXCUSE that you're NOT a techie because you DON'T need to be a techie to detect when the laptop startup takes more time than normal.  OR when you hear eerie sounds 'inside' the laptop when you access files.  OR when it gets stalled during your work📌📌📌

OR let's pick the most common symptom that's happening to many of us when we are in the midst of our tasks.  Those headaches [which you quickly shrug off as 'OH THAT'S MY MIGRAINE'.  OR those recurring cases when you missed out a thing or two [and when it keeps recurring, it becomes chronic]. Those momentary lapses.  We can keep going and there's a plethora of these symptoms✅✅✅

Oh, swinging over to FRAUD, not to heap any blame on the poor victims BUT prior to getting hit with FRAUD, there's a 'chain of events' that would have prompted or alerted the prospective FRAUD victim [at that time] but again, we either glossed over it and just ignored it all.  At the end of the day, let us remember what Carlos Ghosn said:  NEVER WAIT FOR THE BEGINNING OF THE END❗❗❗

Is Your Frying Pan 'BIG ENOUGH'?

 Is Your Frying Pan 'BIG ENOUGH'?

Is Your Frying Pan 'BIG ENOUGH'?  It's true you DON'T need more than just one frying pan at any given time.  BUT, sometimes, you would need a much bigger pan.  And sometimes you need it a bit deeper.  Such is the analogy with life itself.  Regardless if you're still a student now, or someone fresh from university, or one who's now in the workforce, or simply being committed to your partner/spouse.  Regardless, you got to be AGILE📗📙📘

If you're a family man, your being AGILE is NOT even asked because that's a given.  I did hear in the past someone grumbling WHY life's travails never seem to end.  And I didn't mince my words when I blurted "OTHERS DIDN'T CHOOSE OUR LIFE BUT US".  Gone are the days of human slavery so never it comes as a surprise if we have the life we have now.  It's us who directed the sail of the boat and it's who will continue to steer it in the high seas and lead it back safely onshore📌📌📌

These days, the baggage that often is at the crux of things is EMOTIONAL BAGGAGE.  Psychologists always stated that "WE ARE ALL CARRYING BACKPACKS THAT WE CONTINUALLY LOAD UP.  WE KEEP STUFFING THEM FULL UNTIL ONE DAY, YOU CAN'T ZIP AND THE STUFF STARTS SPILLING OUT ALL OVER THE PLACE".  And this picture says it all.  Lesson here:  Let us NOT eat beyond what we can chew. way beyond our capacity and capability💊💊💊

So, here are some basic questions for us:  How much does your life weigh?  Imagine for a second you're carrying a backpack.  And I want you to feel the straps on your shoulders and then, try filling it up with people.  Start with casual acquaintances, friends of friends. folks around the office then move to the people that you TRUST unconditionally💎💎💎

So what is this proverbial backpack?  And how can we prevent it from filling up to the point where we feel like we CAN'T carry all of our 'stuff'?  To get to the bottom of it [pun intended], let us NOT be so over-zealous to stretch ourselves too thinly by [falsely but sometimes in good faith] raising expectations in our capability to carry on responsibilities✅✅✅

A Rising Tide Lifts All The Boats

A Rising Tide Lifts All The Boats

No sirrrrrs, today's piece is neither about the maritime industry nor about sailors.  Instead, A Rising Tide Lifts All The Boats attempts to map those scenarios to our life wherein we are the TIDE that directly shapes and influences the lives of our immediate loved ones, our immediate family.  That level of the tide dictates the tempo and even the very fate of the boats itself📌📌📌

Those boats onshore are akin to our loved ones.  Whatever happens to them is dictated by the way you live and lead your life.  If you're the head of the family, too much responsibilities rest on your shoulders.  And it is NOT sufficient that you are soft and kind hearted.  Heads of families need to be ASSERTIVE, DECISIVE and PERSISTENT to the extent of being PUSHY because you DON'T have that intestinal fortitude to be the leader of your family, your family's direction may get waylaid💊💊💊

Your SENSE of RESPONSIBILITY dictates upon you to be the forceful leader who will lead the pack to an outcome favorable to everyone.  Unfortunately, I can attest to have seen people whose BEST TRAITS, if at all, are the dreaded 3 F's namely FEEBLE, FEARFUL and FRIGHTENED.  Imagine that hesitation to step forward as the person gets 'hostaged' by endless apprehensions in life❓❓❓

GRIT, FORTITUDE and WILLPOWER are the most basic traits that one has to equip himself for him to LEAD effectively.  Try to take away GRIT, FORTITUDE and WILLPOWER, what you have at hand is your RECIPE for FAILURE.  Who wants to end up with the family members taking their own separate paths?  Who wants to end up in an 'EMPTY HOME'❓❓❓

Sadly, I have seen lives wasted because it was NOT steered with GRIT and FORTITUDE.  The supposed LEADER can be soft spoken and kind but those are NOT the essential traits a LEADER is expected to manifest.  Take away that GRIT and FORTITUDE [pardon me, a.k.a. 'balls], your life and likely the lives of your loved ones will likely be 'off tracked' till one by one, FAILURE becomes the end result.  Lesson here is that YOU as the TIDE will shape or ship out others lives✅✅✅

When YOUR World Gets Smaller

When YOUR World Gets Smaller

Talking about the world seems huge indeed.  But can we agree that our world is what we want anyone.  If as this poster says, 'EVERYTHING IS OK', so be it, your world will be as what you said it.  Here's the caveat though.  What you say or what you said may not be factual but sadly, it could be more fiction more than anything else.  And when that happens, it is not too far fetched to anticipate that probably YOUR WORLD GETS SMALLER, no thanks to you though💎💎💎

Whether you think the world you live in is that too big and wide OR too cramped or limiting, it is shaped more by your very own outlook in life.  If living marginally is acceptable to you, you can forget dreaming to live in quite a bigger and probably palatial place.  Whereas, if you continue to hunger for the ultimate success, likely your fate is plotted right on your palms.  But let's not be daydreaming for now💹💹💹

Reality is, a lot of news remain bleak.  When we hear breakups, job loss or even your pet getting sick, that can make it even harder to have hope for the future.  Like the recent years, its been tough.  The aftermath of that cruel pandemic caused almost seven million deaths all over.  Taken altogether, it can all feel incredibly bleak and quite difficult to cope with💊💊💊

So how do we extricate ourselves from a deep hole when our WORLD is GETTING SMALLER?  First and foremost, embrace ACCEPTANCE.  Admit that you're NOT OK.  Listing down all your 'down moments' can be powerful and it becomes practical because you simply can't take care of yourself if you DON'T know what's wrong or what you need⏳⏳⏳

It will also be helpful to remind yourself of everything you're dealing with at the moment.  I lost my job.  I broke off with my partner.  I've been ill off and on.  Putting things in such plain terms can help you put things in perspective too.  Most importantly, you can plot your way forward back, regardless if it will take you 'donkey' years as long as you're able to have that 'TURNAROUND' and reverse that worsening pattern to your favor❗❗❗

Are You 'SURFING BACK' The Wave To The Shores?

 Are You 'SURFING BACK' The Wave To The Shores?

Oh no sirrrrrrs, our piece today is NOT about surfing.  Moreover, from A to Z. I DON'T have the sound fundamentals about surfing but this piece is all an analogy of surfing with our life.  So when surfers blurt out, ' Are You 'SURFING BACK' The Wave To The Shores, we got to align with the surfer's jargon and as any surfer already knows anyway, waves are what it's all about.  They would discover the kinds of waves and there's more to that though⏳⏳⏳

And quickly skimming through the basic surfer's basics, I learnt of late that one of the things that make surfing so much of a CHALLENGE is that EVERY WAVE IS DIFFERENT.  Which is NOT far different from life itself.  Life is like the ocean in that, from ashore, watching the magnificent waves roll is one thing.  But stepping into the ocean is totally another story.  Rediscovering that balance of "SURRENDER" and "STRENGTH" in an entirely different element is a whole other thing📌📌📌

Life indeed is like the ocean in that seeing its surface, and even appreciating its beauty, is NOT the same as diving in.  NOTHING can prepare you for that experience of the ocean except stepping into the ocean itself.  From the initial cold water washing onto your feet, legs and torso, to its upcoming currents pulling you in as you walk deeper, to that moment of CHOICE TO SURRENDER to its entirely other element, wherein you need to breathe, move and flow differently.  In the OCEAN OF LIFE, where are you BTW❓❓❓

There are times to sit, peaceful on the beach before or after swimming.  To rest.  To take a respite.  To take that unparalleled view.  Those are the times when you want everything to freeze as those are the moments when you deserve such a break.  And that includes as part of your reflections.  And this is where the analogy of life with the waves as you prepare to take another plunge✅✅✅

So, when are you ready to take the plunge and go out there and face the challenge of the waves?  That's when you have completed your milestones [for READINESS].  And that's when you can beat your chest and proudly shout that YOU'RE READY.  But more than just being READY, you're all primed to surf back the wave to the shores when you complete the two-way trip.  At that point, there is NO ROOM for doubt❗❗❗

Losing A Little Juice Should NOT Be An Excuse

Losing A Little Juice Should NOT Be An Excuse

Nope sirs, today's piece is NOT about the drinks offered in your fav resto.  Instead, this is all about our 'JUICES in LIFE' which are our very strengths BUT again, losing a little juice is A-OK.  Yes it may cause some dent BUT it could wreak havoc in your life unless you're able to manage and handle it to avoid any undue hemorrhage which at worst may even be fatal in life💊💊💊

It's akin to driving and suddenly you're skidding and the only solution therein is to steer out of that skid.  Through the years, we would realize that we may not as in tip-top shape as it was before.  Our reflexes may be less sharper.  Our agility may have taken a few steps backward.  Even our energy levels may not have a china man's chance in the AMAZING RACE but all is NOT lost if we are losing a little juice.  It will be A-OK⏳⏳⏳

One trick I realized that seems to work is to be a NOVICE all over again.  Being a NOVICE should neither be a shame nor a stigma in life.  Learning the ropes of new interests, even non-physically taxing activities like my blogging, that should work wonders to us because I can attest that as much as I may have quite a good proficiency of English, the best way to test is not just the pudding but to eat out the cake itself.  JUST DO IT📌📌📌

Obviously, some things will be OFF-LIMITS to you, especially if you need to heed your doctor's advice.  But other than that, NOTHING is really OFF-LIMITS.  If you're into a relationship and you have been so damn boring all through your life, try to RE-INVENT yourself, taking a 180-degree turn from what you were, along in life✅✅✅

And let's face it, we all have this common ground, that of reaching our homestretch when we taper off and slow down, way away from that dreadful RAT RACE but into a pace that will rhyme with our need to really enjoy in the best quality way what life is all about for us.  So, losing a little juice should NOT cause you sleepless nights.  On the other hand, your adrenalin should remain at FULL-TANK❗❗❗

When Your Performance Is Abysmal

When Your Performance Is Abysmal

Maybe you're still in school and you delivered your dissertation but you felt you flopped.  OR you just got out of your company's annual performance review and the results were NOT good.  Whether you were anticipating the bad news or it was a total surprise, it still stings, right?  You might even currently be feeling some combination of embarrassment, disappointment, shock, fear and anger or you're just too worried that your job may be standing on some shaky ground?  Indeed, we'll all feel that LOW and with our shot-down motivation when our performance is abysmal but again, all is NOT lost because that's NOT the end of the world, trust me💹💹💹

And why do I beg you to trust me?  Oh, I've been there, felt that, done that.  And again, ALL IS NOT LOST ]not even if you got with a streak of extremely bad luck].  So how do we handle this?  First, do allow yourself to feel BUMMED OUT. While you might be tempted to protect your EGO by dismissing or rationalizing your boss' feedback, do RESIST THAT URGE💎💎💎

By giving yourself the chance to experience the negative emotions associated with failure, you'll be more motivated to do better next time. Feeling the pain now can act as powerful FUEL to prevent yourself from making similar mistakes in the future.  Once you have slightly [because I promise you, you cant get over the hump overnight], then that's the time to take a step back and focus on doing something about it.  No one enjoys getting a negative review [and things get worse if we DON'T like how  such feedback was delivered to you]⏳⏳⏳

Still, if you can look at the feedback in a objective manner, you'll benefit from it.  One step farther after you did determine the areas you to work on, do SET CLEAR GOALS no less.  Make them challenging enough but achievable. But do articulate for yourself the SUCCESS CRITERIA you need to meet📌📌📌

After the whole nine yards of your recovery plan is laid out, seek FEEDBACK.  Check it out to gauge yourself.  BTW, just DON'T gauge yourself, that's OFF mark.  Along the way, REBUILD RELATIONSHIPS because you can't underestimate the value of your colleagues because they can be HUGE in terms of influence to repair your tattered reputation  PICK UP THE PIECES, dude❗❗❗

Are You A 'NEEDLE-MOVER'?

Are You A 'NEEDLE-MOVER'?

Serious question.  Are You A 'NEEDLE-MOVER'?  Unfortunately, sometimes, this question gets laughed up, with reactions like 'ARE YOU SERIOUS?'  Which means I need to do a bit of my homework and some 'hard sell' here.  Just to ensure we are all on the same page, let's agree on being a 'NEEDLE-MOVER' and simply put, it means that when you're involved either in an endeavor, an initiative or a deliverable, your involvement creates a positive impact that helps things to be done and delivered⏳⏳⏳

At the workplace, we all want to see and have a good job.  And we all want to be appreciated and recognized for our accomplishments and hard work.  And often, an employee is justified is his or her 'under appreciated' feeling but this is NOT about growth potential or intelligence they bring to the job.  To be appreciated [and for a strong organization to grow], people need to tune into where OR how they are indeed moving the needle, if at all💎💎💎

To be blunt about it, as a worker, if we want to claim that we're a 'NEEDLE-MOVER', we need to use the same gauge as our boss [for consistency if we may].  We might recognize 'NEEDLE-MOVER' as an analog idiom, like when moving the needle on a speedometer, the needle gauge on an audio VU meter or otherwise measure a meaningful difference or progress.  Indeed, context is everything but it usually means a positive or productive gain on the scale.  In the marketing space, the measurable gain would be like achieving growth goals and generating sales💊💊💊

So what's our "SUCCESS LESSON' of moving the needle? For any company, the lesson here is that success is likely to follow when both the boss and the employee are watching and moving the same needle.  A meaningful contribution is based on a mutual understanding of what's important and how it is being measured.  So, the same question just bounces back to us: 'HOW ARE WE MOVING THE NEEDLE?', if at all.  BTW, there's a pitfall in this thread📌📌📌

So this 'NEEDLE-MOVER' challenge applies to us all.  You could be a student but how can you be a NEEDLE-MOVER?  If you're into a relationship, are you a NEEDLE-MOVER such that the health if your relationship has progressed enough to be robust and stable?  At work, how far have you proven yourself to be a NEEDLE-MOVER to warrant your dreamt promotion? As an entrepreneur, have you become a NEEDLE-MOVER enough to push up your revenues and further business growth📗📕📘