Go Beyond Being Cynical

Go Beyond Being Cynical

Please allow me to day-dream now, albeit in a fleeting way.  I closed my eyes and I ask myself how often have I been cynical in life.  And regardless if it is often or rarely, it's worth asking why can't we Go Beyond Being Cynical?  Definitely, this could open up the floodgates for a debate whether it's worth our time today to discuss being cynical.  But let me be frank enough on this.  Cynicism impacts our life.

And this is my favorite attestation.  I have had friends who react differently to having a glass half-filled with water.  Some are thankful enough because it is half-full while some I found them frowning because it is half-empty.  Imagine how the world can turn upside down simply because of perspectives.

So, more often, situations become YOU versus ME for opinions.  And as we know, we live in an age where there is NO shortage of opinion.  And the default attitude toward the world appears to be cynicism.  DON'T get me wrong though.  My fingers are NOT pointed at you.

The question confronting us is this:  how do we handle the cynics and pessimists whose usual response to a new idea is to explain why why it won't work, why it's doomed to fail or why it's simply not worth pursuing?  Of course, cynics and pessimists rarely own up wo who are they are.  Instead, they will tell you they're realists. However, REALISM is often just a thin disguise for the much deeper problems of cynicism and pessimism.

The worst thing about the constant barrage of negative voices is that they snuff out HOPE.  And you never get to a better future without HOPE.  So how do we handle the cynics?  First off, trace back the SOURCE.  Drill down further and you might discover that in their personal livs, they've rarely attempted anything.  Lesson here:  NEVER TRUST those who have opinions on everything and even attempt nothing with their own life.  BTW, cynicism is NOT a spiritual gift.  HOLD ON though.  NOT all negative opinions are bad opinions.  Sometimes, what you're saying or doing needs correction in whole or in part.  And I learned in life that the best critiques come from people who are attempting to do something significant with their lives.  So, please let us GO BEYOND BEING CYNICAL📌📌📌

Cover Your Tracks

 Cover Your Tracks

Good morning and HAPPY SUNDAY. Oh, did it ever cross your mind that you need to Cover Your Tracks?  Nemind.  Let's just agree to this basic ground rule that while being an 'OPEN BOOK' seems to be ideal, life ISN'T all about being an 'OPEN BOOK' because reality is, it is imperative to Cover Your Tracks when needed.  In any facet of your daily life, a modicum of prudence and privacy dictates upon us to take those proactive measures.  Even at the workplace where you are fully aware of what/where are the 'CHINKS IN YOUR ARMOUR' so you would come up with a remediation plan to resolve those 'chinks' because no way should you be 'EXPOSED'

BTW, this ground rule is equally imperative in our digital activities.  That explains why browsers and apps would always give you an option to CLEAR HISTORY because simply put, you need to Cover Your Tracks.  Leave that OPEN and UNATTENDED.  Voila, you will be EXPOSED [you DON'T want that]

Even in your best plans with the best intentions, you want to keep things under wraps because by doing so, it gives you that motivation to push yourself to go for results and that's by way of covering your tracks.

Not to impute that there are people around/near you with ill intentions but that's the harsh reality we need to face especially when we're dealing with strangers.  So you don't spill out details of your financials, be it your savings or liabilities.  And in the workplace, by being aware of your weaknesses at work and working to fix it all, until then, you continue to cover your tracks.

So as I won't be misconstrued of ramming this through your throat, we fervently hope that we're all aligned with the given that life is all about repeated 'BALANCING ACTS' when you need to weigh when to be COVERT versus OVERT as either option has its UPsides and DOWNsides. Bottom line is Covering Your Tracks will always hinge on your JUDGMENT CALL because that's all matters in life⏳⏳⏳

Watch Your TRAJECTORY

Watch Your TRAJECTORY

Seriously, how's your TRAJECTORY as we speak now?  Not to be scared, there is no right or wrong answer but we need an answer, I'm serious.  Otherwise, if you tell me now that you are totally clueless as regards your TRAJECTORY as we speak now, that is so alarming because that tells me of fluttering RED FLAGS that need to be addressed with no less than an urgency

So, the biggest question you might dump on me is this:  WHO CARES about the TRAJECTORY.  Ooooops, we got to know our TRAJECTORY as we speak now because we got to pay attention to how our we faring in life.  Starting to build SELF-AWARENESS is the first step after all.

Seriously, it's hard to find our purpose because we DON'T really know ourselves.  We DON'T know what we genuinely like to do or why we do what we do.  We NEVER question what influences us.  We even end up in a career because our parents approved of it, because we thought it would be safe or because it was easy enough.

There are many ways to develop SELF-AWARENESS and it starts with APPRECIATION. Regarding careers, if we are so fixated with high pay and all that stuff, getting constantly focused on getting enough points to get to the 'NEXT LEVEL', we will miss out on everything.  Way back my school years, I knew I wanted to become a lawyer as I thought that will be me a 'CLEAR PATH' to 'MAKE A DIFFERENCE'.  Of course, I realized how fraught all those rosy intentions were.

Like me [BEFORE], you may still be trapped worrying about you're 'MAKING A DIFFERENCE' in an appropriately prestigious way.  You may still get trapped longing for all the stuff that are important to you.  Now, let us take a PULSE CHECK and WATCH OUR TRAJECTORY because from that will tell you how you will need to plot your NEXT MOVES, NEXT PLANS❗❗❗

Recency Bias

Recency Bias

For us to be on the same page, let me quote how Recency Bias is defined in Wikipedia:  It is a COGNITIVE BIAS THAT FAVORS RECENT EVENTS OVER HISTORIC ONES whereas in MEMORY BIAS, it gives MORE IMPORTANCE TO THE MOST RECENT EVENT.   In brief, it is no less than a psychological phenomenon where a person can remember something which has happened recently.

If you are into trading, Recency Bias is your #1 enemy.  Why?  Because it tends to extrapolate the recent experiences that will happen to you in the future.  And if you are into investing and trading, Recency Bias is one of the biggest disasters that you may face because when investors try to invest, the Recency Bias skews the entire reality.

Truth is, there is always a huge gap between FACT and BIAS so our challenge now is how to overcome Recency Bias.  First off, avoid having a MYOPIC VIEW of things because that means you are constricting yourself to the four walls of the environment you're in.  And you yourself DON'T want to try SOMETHING NEW.  But since Recency Bias helps you to build your views based on the latest outcomes, try to overcome it by thinking about a bigger picture in your life.

Secondly, always try to work in with WHAT YOU HAVE IN CONTROL.  Setting realistic expectations is something that can put you down and bring false hopes in your life.  Always try to remember the fact that Recency Bias feeds into the belief that you have in your life.  

Most importantly, DON'T ever get swayed with the latest results, latest outcomes you had.  Results and numbers may seem so positive as the numbers are poppiing right in front of you.  But never forget that Recency Bias is a BRAIN ILLUSION.  Always try to understand that cyclicality comes with a lot of terrains.  There is not a smooth road that you can take to success.  Recency Bias is a brain illusion that happens when you see the latest issues.  It is your very brain tricking you into thinking that the same will happen again.  Be forewarned❗❗❗

When The Price is Too Steep

When The Price is Too Steep

It is a given that NOTHING IS FREE IN LIFE, not those freebies, not even those tempting 'FREE LUNCHES'.  Why?  Simple.  There will always be strings attached to it.  Even those tons of 'giftaways' Third World politicians would wantonly throw around during their political campaign.  Why?  Because out of that largesse, they 'might' be anticipating to 'REAP the FRUITS' once they become the political incumbents. That is When The Price is Too Steep.

When we plan out our holidays, we would be spending so much time with the travel industry's market players like Agoda and Booking.com and as the caveat goes, 'LOVELY PLACE BUT ENTRY PRICE IS TOO STEEP'.  Such is life.  For every premium add-on, the price tag levels up as well.  Even when when you go to McDonalds, the counter personnel will throw up tons of queries like, would you UPGRADE your fries, your drinks, and all that stuff.  Things get murkier and a bit complex when we delve with our relationships with our partner, spouse and even with our immediate family circle.  The equation will never be as simple as X's and O's.

Over at the NBA, it is a wild marketplace no less.  Players get traded and flipped overnight, sometimes not to their liking but as long as the interested party can meet even a steep orie, then the trade transaction is a 'GO'.  And trading NBA players sometimes involve more than just an arm and a leg. 

In relationships and even in commercials, QUID PRO QUO prevails most of the time.  And the exchange or transaction that gets consummated may not be on par in terms of value.  I may have a lemon and you got an apple but even if that apple is pricier, if you need my lemon, things become at par.

If QUID PRO QUO is too much of a jargon, let's settle with GIVE and TAKE.  And let's buckle down with relationships with couples.  WHY the friction?  WHY the tiff?  WHY the tantrums?  WHY the standoff? Point it to the GIVE and TAKE equation.  Likely the desired equilibrium in a relationship is slanted.  Either there is too much GIVE or there is just too much TAKE.  Why are we always in this conundrum?  It's because when we fail to realize When The Price is Too Steep, then we would [wrongly and falsely ] believe that all is FAIR and JUST when in truth, things seem UNFAIR and UNJUST, all because When The Price is Too Steep❗❗❗

What Goes Around Comes Around

What Goes Around Comes Around

What Goes Around Comes Around.  Yesirrrrs this is a FACT.  Nothing in life takes the one-way road.  You can traverse any road and get assured that at some point, What Goes Around Comes Around.  Anything that transpires along that long winded road will get back to you either in a positive or negative manner.  Your good deeds will surely bounce back to you in multiples forms and shape.  Any bad deeds, if any, will surely haunt you as well.  Knock on wood, we hope not.

It's an open book that almost all of the world's billionaires are all philanthropists in their own right.  Don't get me wrong though. We're not implying that we should turn a leaf and be philanthropists as well.  Certainly NOT.  But if we buy-in to the fact that what goes around comes around, at the very least, at the barest minimum, go beyond yourself.

And this goes true from either side of the coin.  Whether it pertains to your good deeds or your NOT SO GOOD deeds, do remember that What Goes Around Comes Around.  To temper expectations and ensure we're all on the same page, we are NOT expected to come up with anything that approximates earth-shaking actions in life.  Instead, it could be sharing a piece of bread similar to that piece of bread you're taking.   We are NOT expected to do things in a spell-binding and spectacular way.

Just yesterday, I went out to the gate when I heard our favorite Tofu Vendor.  And when I saw him together with his 6-year old son, my heart just 'melted'.  I told myself, if I could not even endure walking under the scorching heat of the sun for four hours or more, how can this 6-year old boy endure it if I can't see myself enduring that?  Off the cuff, I rushed back and looked for some goodies to gift the boy together with a small token amount.  Just an instantaneous act.

This reminds me of a story shared by the late writer [Ricky Lo] about that story way back 1892 at Stanford U wherein two students who were unable to meet ends thought of organizing a small-scale concert featuring the famous pianist Ignacy Paderewski, whose manager demanded a $2,000 guaranteed fee.  The concert did happen but the student organizers were in the RED because the total revenues totaled $1,600 only.  

So, they had to hand over the $1,600 in cash and a post-dated cheque for $400, promising to settle that.  Paderewski refused that act.  He returned the post-dated cheque and furthermore, he gave back to the two students the $1,600 cash and advised them to deduct all their expenses from that amount including their anticipated school expenses.  Whew!  That may be a small act of kindness but it's more than that.  It clearly marked Paderewski not only as a great pianist but more importantly, a great human being.  

And if most of us will ask ourselves 'WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO ME IF I HELP THEM?", great human beings like Pderewski could have asked himself "WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO THEM IF I DON'T HELP THEM?"  BTW, later on, Paderewski became a Prime Minister of Poland and during his stint as the Prime Minister, World War II ravaged the 1.3 million Polish population and this time around, it was his turn to ask for help.  And he met Herbert Hoover who went on to become a U.S. President.  Guess what?  Hoover immediately facllitated sending tons of food grain to the starving Polish population.  What better proof that indeed What Goes Around Comes Around❗❗❗

When The Concrete Collapses

When The Concrete Collapses

No sirrrrs, today's piece is NOT about structural engineering as that is not within my domain.  Instead, I'd like to compare life's worst trials and tribulations to those times when the concrete collapses.  What this tells us is that regardless of the strength and sturdiness of the building materials, there remains that probability that one day it could tilt and later on, even crumble and collapse.

Certainly, when the concrete collapses, it becomes akin to the worst trials in life.  When we receive a failing mark in school.  When a serious health issue hits our family.  When we are in very dire financial straits.  When all so suddenly, we are out there, jobless in the street.  When our entrepreneurial initiatives end in very disastrous way that spirals as it ends impacting us not just financially but sometimes, our mental and physical health.  Or you can be a law-abiding citizen throughout your life but somehow you get jailed because you were at the WRONG PLACE at the WRONG TIME.

But to borrow word from J.K. Rowling, the very successful British author, more known for the Harry Potter Series, 'ROCK BOTTOM BECAME THE SOLID FOUNDATION ON WHICH I REBUILT MY LIFE'.  So, without going deep into her Bio, she did hit the worst of the worst rock bottoms one could ever get hit in life but rather than to dampen or deter her from moving forward, she leveraged on it to become the very foundation from where her life-rebuilding journey leveraged on.  

And before Forbes' named her as the world's highest paid author, she had to endure it when her mother died of multiple sclerosis, her marriage failed and she had to live and depend on state assistance as she slowly picked up all the broken pieces in her life.  And in her Bio, she admits that a few times, she was just about to give up in life because she was convinced that she won't be able to rise up again after all the double and triple-wammies she went through in life.  If there's anything we can pick up and learn from J.K. Rowling, it is for us to realize that nothing and nothing should be a show-stopper for us to rebuild and recover our life even if we really felt we were squeezed fatally hard when the concrete did collapsed

So, how do we survive when the concrete collapses?  First off, identify the feeling that envelopes you.  Is it anger?  Grief?  Sadness?  Then, GO AHEAD & CRY.  Nothing to be ashamed of it.  You got to LET IT OUT.  Now, re-examine deeply close enough and ask WHO COULD YOU HAVE DONE IT BETTER?  At that point, be forgiving whether to yourself or to whoever is the culprit.  Then find your close coterie of trusted people and just UNLOAD everything but if there are moments you need to be alone, go for it, you deserve those moments of solitude.  Lastly, PRACTICE PATIENCE especially when pain takes time to resolve❗❗❗

When Doubt Creeps In

When Doubt Creeps In

Similar to the roads and highways, nothing is paved smoothly.  And when you drive over to the countryside, anywhere you go you'll end up with nothing but rough roads.  BTW, such is life, nothing is a paved road.  Even and especially in your relationships.  When Doubt Creeps In, what's your next move?  That's a $64 question that sounds simple but I'll admit, it may even take a lifetime to handle such doubt and at worst, things may even be too much to handle.

As it is, DOUBT is a very powerful force in life.  It can consume your life and even sabotage your potential success.  Even at the peak of the peak, you may face moments questioning yourself.  But hey, this is not like Mount Everest too steep to climb.  Truth, is just SHUT IT OFF and MOVE FORWARD.  And there's this old saying 'THE MORE YOU KNOW, THE LESS YOU KNOW' because that's when Doubt Creeps In and maybe you're in a standstill.

Sometimes, you start looking for that PERFECT ANSWER to a question and that even becomes a 'VALID' excuse NOT to take any real action. But the truth is, you probably already know ore than enough to take that first step.  And whatever action you take will result in experience that will help you grow and build momentum.  In real life, when things 'LOOK OK' on the surface, underneath things could be chaotic and you just refuse to look at it.

But hey, once you step into the realm of sharing, things will get easier and much smoother because that will give you an understanding with insights from people with knowledge and those willing to help about what is needed to do to avert when doubt creeps in. Now if there is a recurring culprit when doubt creeps in, it is LAZINESS.  Let's face it, a lot of us are simply damn LAZY.  But hey, laziness is a deceiving experience. 

But outright you might quickly retort, "i'M NOT LAZY.  I WORK HARD".  BUT here's the BUT.  Laziness is NOT a measure of how hard you work.  I'm sure many of you work hard but feel you're in a place where you want to do something new and you just can't seem to move forward getting it done.  BTW, laziness is a byproduct of comfort.  When you're DOUBTING yourself, you get so comfortable with the pain you currently have or the fear you already know that you'd rather live with what you know than venture into WHAT YOU DON'T KNOW.  And it can seem exhausting to make the effort to change things or take risks even if you know that success or a better life is on the other side of the fence.  If at this point doubt still creeps in, do you really want to get stuck❓❓❓ 

Chime In Anytime

Chime In Anytime

No sirrrrrrs, we DON'T live our life based on a script, based on a screenplay.  To live life consistent with truism, the question as to when to Chime In Anytime is moot and academic. It's NOT even a talking points at all.  UNLESS we are incapacitated.  UNLESS we are coerced.  UNLESS we are inhibited. UNLESS we are incommunicado.  UNLESS we have waived and raised the WHITE FLAG of SURRENDER.  UNLESS you have zero cards left on your deck.  UNLESS you have become a non-entity.  UNLESS you are defaulting from all your rights and privileges attendant to your existence.  UNLESS you are succumbing to this basketful of UNLESS 'exit routines', then you need to have that gumption to Chime In Anytime you need to take an initiative, Chime In Anytime  you need to take a PRINCIPLED STAND, Chime In Anytime you need your voice to be heard in an impartial and fearless manner, Chime In Anytime you need to 'RIGHT the WRONG', Chime In Anytime you cannot accept an act that is either deplorable, despicable and disgraceful act or language by anyone against your hapless persona.

Can we imagine a couple in an impasse, in a damn hard deadlock after locking horns over and over again, with neither party willing to give way.  What happens if neither couple chimes in anytime?  Obviously, that kind of doomed relationship will have its 'curtain call' sooner than the optimists can expect. 

Without sounding political, let's swing back and quickly banner the latest NOBEL PEACE PRIZE winners in Russian Dmitry Muratov and Maria Ressa And what is their common denominator?  As journalists, Day-in Day-out, they never feared when to Chime In Anytime, for them to be the messaging channel as journalists despite being under constant threat by their respective governments in Russia and the Philippines.

So I salute the diehard  followers of Donald Trump even if some segments are part of the ultra right  I salute as well the dyed in the wool Democrats for NOT waivering when they had to take a stand along party lines.  Anyone I abhor and loathe?  Yesirrrrrs, I detest those fellows who are intellectually upright but have obviously defaulted to let their voices heard with regard their respective political stands.  And when sometimes they do chime in, it is TOO LITTLE TOO LATE. Indeed, what a HUGE WASTE.  Being intellectually upright but intellectually INUTILE to 'SPEAK THEIR MINDS'.  Instead they prefer to some subtle SABER RATTLING in social media.  So in life, please do Chime In Anytime

When Do You PULL THE PLUG

 When Do You PULL THE PLUG

Who says that life is a 'CAKE WALK' or a 'WALK IN THE PARK'? Yes, you can stroll at New York's Central Park when you're there but that's about it.  Otherwise, in life, there will be peaks and valleys, crests and troughs.  And as in all the storied lives, not all stories have a happy ending.  And for those stories with not so happy endings, that decision point as to When you have to PULL THE PLUG will likely be part of the equation.

Figuratively speaking, to PULL THE PLUG  means coming to grips with a decision that you would rather not face because either of the options in your hands would like be unpalatable to say the least. Unfortunately, such is life.  There will be episodes where we hit rock bottom, with the skies crumbling down.

I remember heart-breaking stories where a family member continues to be on 'life support' and it's for the family to decide WHEN TO PULL THE PLUG.  And there are zillion stories not at that severity but nevertheless, there are many circumstances in our life when we need to decide as to WHEN TO PULL THE PLUG

If a couple 'in turmoil' for many years have been trying to save the relationship in vain, WHEN TO PULL THE PLUG is not the attractive solution but it could be the final fix.  If a business has been 'bleeding' and its owners getting into a debt situation that is ballooning beyond rescue, WHEN TO PULL THE PLUG is an option to seriously consider. If in the workplace, you have endured a constant scrutiny from your bosses despite all your best efforts, WHEN TO PULL THE PLUG may be the pill you need to swallow from thereon.

At the end of the day, WHEN TO PULL THE PLUG remains as one of the options that's always within our fingertips when all other ways to repair, resuscitate and rescue after you have endured a hell lot of battering, exhausting all cards.  If your toes are at the edges of a deep ravine, would you take the plunge or get that courage TO PULL THE PLUG as a last option❓❓❓