Trust The Process

Trust The Process

Question:  Anyone PATIENT in the room now?  Unfortunately, many of us DON'T really practice or manifest PATIENCE.  We order a McDonalds meal via mobile apps.  Presto, in 30 to 60 minutes, we'll get it even without leaving home.  That's really how to Trust The Process.  Problem is, because of all these mobile apps facilitating, everything SEEMS immediate.  We just expect things immediately.  Otherwise, something is WRONG.  And if we DON'T see it, it must NOT be there.  Problem is, WHAT you see OR DON'T see is hardly ever the whole picture.  Our vision tends to be limited.  Our eyes AREN'T a reliable source of truth, unfortunately📘📙📗

Problem is, we're blind to the reality of things.  We tend to fixate on the wrong things because we expect to see the fruition of WHAT we do within a given timeframe.  The thing is, we DON'T reap in the same season we sow.  And the price we pay for this is we tend to allow DOUBT and DISBELIEF to creep in.  We then become fearful and begin to lose faith and eventually, WHAT happens next is we GIVE UP📌📌📌

Now, let's take an analogy with the bamboo where, for its first 4 years, it's building its foundations via its roots.  And if we DON'T see the shoots after quite sometime, that's enough [?] for us to believe that that seed is dead [?] OR we end up deducing something went wrong and then, we GIVE UP.  Analogy here is that the bigger the building, the deeper the foundations.  The taller the tree, the deeper the roots.  In essence, you CAN'T trust WHAT you see OR DON'T see.  In fact, studies show that 90 percent of the time, there's more to see, OR, you just CAN'T see WHAT you need to.  Thing is, you only REAP AFTER YOU SOW.  So, you might ask, is it worth to TRUST THE PROCESS?  The short and long answer there is, IT DEPENDS.  WHAT are you trying to grow?  Our lessons in life tell us that your expectations have to be relative and proportional to your desired outcome.  The development time is proportional to the size of the output💦💦💦

As an analogy again, if you want to grow a patch of grass, then fine.  You DON'T need to do much, right?  DON'T expect it to take too long.  BUT you CAN'T have the same expectations if you want to grow an oak tree.  To make things simple, if you want to build a tent, expect it to take between 10 to 30 minutes, assuming you have all the needed equipments and accessories.  BUT you got to remember that that tent CAN'T and WON'T withstand the fury of a storm [or even a heavy rain, I guess].  Rain OR cold, it's NOT even a long-term solution.  And if you want a long-term solution, you know a brick house is best BUT it will take 100 times the effort and time to finish💧💧💧

Our takeaway:  There is NO perfect thing beyond dreams.  If you want to cook a meal to satisfy your hunger, yes, pronto, that microwave food is the best option.  BUT better be forewarned that that food will NOT taste nice enough OR be as healthy as a home cook meal [which obviously needs more investment in terms of time and energy to cook and prepare it]. Bottomline, ask yourself, do you want a patch of grass OR an oak tree?  A short-term tent OR a long-term house?  A frozen pizza will be quicker.  BUT a home-cooked meal will taste much better.  WHAT this tells us is that substantial things in life take time.  It takes time to learn a new instrument and even decades to master a craft.  Thing is, let us TRUST THE PROCESS, no less than that💥💥💥

Don't Let Go Of The Rope

Don't Let Go Of The Rope

Sometimes, everyone of us would feel like the weight of the world is on our shoulders and we then feel like just GIVING UP [when everything seems to be crumbling through our shoulders].  And we CAN'T blame ourselves WHEN  we feel like life is falling apart and we DON'T know WHAT to do.  BUT DON'T LET GO OF THE ROPE📗📙📘

So, WHAT can a person do WHO sees life falling apart right before his very eyes?  YES YES YES, I've been through that wringer many times in the past and I have figured out WHEN one comes across those rough times, it's like 'manna from heaven' to have that one person to be there.  And that person could make anybody better even on the worst day of their life.  BUT it's true that some people are NOT as lucky to have a person like this OR NOT yet at least💦💦💦

Truth is, some of the hardest things in life are the greatest things and are obtained by NEVER giving up.  If everything was so easy, then, trust me, everybody would be doing it.  Makes sense?  NO matter HOW rough things get, we can still push through and find a way to get past those rough times.  If everyone gave up WHEN things get rough, WHERE would our country and our world be today?  WOULD our soldiers just give up WHEN they have to walk a couple of miles in the heat to help rescue hostages caught in the midst of the crossfires?  WOULD it even be very much fun to watch professional sports if a player gets a little bit ahead of the other so that they would GIVE UP on chasing them down and letting them score instead?  WHAT happens when a single parent is having trouble raise their teenage son and they are in trouble all the time?  Does that parent just GIVE UP on them and blurt DO WHAT YOU WANT📌📌📌

This is WHERE I will vociferously intervene and scream categorically that we just CAN'T GIVE UP on anything.  WHETHER it be friends even WHEN they are going through rough times.  OR even dreams and all the hopes and future goals we have for ourselves.  The very core of all core things here is to remember are all the hopes and future goals we have pre-set for ourselves.  And that NO matter HOW hard things get, just DON'T GIVE UP on life because here's a blanket guarantee you can quote from me:  WHEN YOU'RE DOWN, THERE'S NO OTHER WAY TO GO BUT UP✅✅✅

Our takeaway:  This is my first-person testimonial.  Many times in the past, I went through NOT just the pain but the scary feeling that I had NO choice but to LET GO OF THE ROPE.  BUT I was my own 'worst enemy' because each time I was kind of fallen on the ground, I would ask myself, ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO LET GO OF THE ROPE?  After all my efforts and sacrifices [and the precious resource called 'TIME'], will everything just go for naught solely because I am [FINALLY] GIVING UP?  Of course, I was always my own devil's advocate blurting out 'NO WAY, JOSE'. I WON'T LET GO OF THE ROPE, NOT now when I have invested so much of myself❗❗❗

Listen MORE To Yourself [MORE Than Listening To Others]

Listen MORE To Yourself [MORE Than Listening To Others]

Fear and anxiety about life are challenges for every individual.  And talking about SELF-CONFIDENCE, everyone else would tell us to listen to ourselves in the same way we need to follow WHAT our conscience tells us.  And WHO else will disagree THAT we should listen to our own conscience 100 percent of the time because there is no better alternative to this.  So let us Listen MORE To Yourself [MORE Than Listening To Others]📗📙📘

It's different if we only depend on the thoughts in our heads.  True, the mind has indications to reveal untruths.  The mind has indications of NOT speaking the truth.  As a result, we state something that is NOT based on facts.  BUT WHAT many of us learned to date in life, WHEN an individual wants to make a decision and he does NOT use his conscience BUT only relies on the thoughts in his head then the results of the decision tend to be based on emotional decisions, instead of coming up with an objective decision💥💥💥

Way back those times when I was about to finish from college, I started diving into a new pool in life.  New friendship.  New opportunities.  And I had to be able to find new ways so that I can easily adapt to the evolving environments WHICH were mostly new to me.  Those times, many dilemmas kept creeping into my mind every night, sometimes ending up in nightmarish dreams.  Admittedly, I DIDN'T know the cause.  Maybe I WASN'T listening to myself then, NOT following WHAT I want.  In the end, I seemed to be like another doubting 'Thomas'💦💦💦

In the end, by doubting myself as an individual, I felt that I was lacking in self-confidence.  BUT adulthood is a time WHEN every individual is looking for one's identity, WHAT comes close to the heels is SELF-CONFIDENCE, WHICH will bring us wisdom in making decisions, WHICH will give us that courage to say something true, WHICH will lead us to sincerity.  BUT enhancing self-confidence is NOT just about you talking a lot WHEN in a discussion forum.  It's NOT just dominating❎❎❎

Our takeaway:  Self-confidence is all about respect.  That ability to place yourself in the correct and balanced position.  NOT dominating and able to respect.  THAT anxiety that comes every night.  THAT dilemma about WHETHER the life we live is useful OR not, is caused by doubt and lack of confidence.  We must be always able to listen to ourselves because WHEN we succeed in listening to the basic things we want, that will pave the road leading towards enhancing our self-confidence.  Once you are leading towards that path, you would realize that you got to LISTEN MORE TO YOURSELF❗❗❗

DON'T Mix & Match LONELINESS Versus ALONENESS

DON'T Mix & Match LONELINESS Versus ALONENESS

Do you remember passing by just outside cinemas?  WHAT do we see 99 percent of the time?  YES, we would see groups chit-chatting, smoking, probably waiting for another person.  You could also often see pairs.  BUT try to attempt finding people who may seem to be 'loners' would likely be in vain.  It's AS IF there is a huge sign outside cinemas stating 'ONLY GROUPS ALLOWED', hew!  C'mon dude, DON'T Mix & Match LONELINESS Versus ALONENESS📗📘📙

WHAT's this?  It seems going to the movies alone is like stumbling into a bathroom of the opposite gender.  Honestly though, there's NOTHING wrong with it intrinsically BUT the dismissive looks and mismatched amenities will ensure that you would feel OUT OF PLACE.  So, WHY are we in that situation?  WHY can something that is technically open to anyone, like a cinema, feel so oppressive and alienating WHEN we DON'T comply with its implicit social norm?  By myself, my theory is that we tend to confuse being alone with feeling lonely.  BUT there's a huge ocean of difference there.  WHILE feeling lonely is the distress that arises WHEN we DON'T feel socially connected, being alone is the factual state of being without company, period.  LONELINESS is a personal feeling WHEREAS ALONENESS is a neutral circumstance, like it OR not💥💥💥

In this sense. LONELINESS is a lot more diverse than ALONENESS.  We can feel lonely NOT just WHEN we're alone BUT also in marriage, among friends, in large crowds.  ALONENESS, however, arises if [and ONLY IF] we're without immediate company.  And yet, we seem to have narrowed down that 'LONELY' stereotype to a person WHO is alone.  BUT all along. I felt that the concept of LONELINESS should include people WHO feel lonely even when with their spouse, family, friends💧💧💧

BUT if there's one thing we need to agree on, it's that different things work for different people at different times.  Only try WHAT you feel comfortable with, and try NOT to put too much pressure on yourself.  And IF something ISN'T working for you [OR it DOESN'T feel possible just now YET], you can always try something else OR come back to it another time.  BUT before anything else, we got to learn to be MORE comfortable in your very own company😂😂😂

Our takeaway: Sometimes, improving our relationships with ourselves as well as others can help us feel less lonely.  You may even find it helpful to start by thinking about WHAT self-care means to you [BUT take that that self-care looks different to everyone.  Thing is, DON'T MIX & MATCH LONELINESS VERSUS ALONENESS❎❎❎

"Health Is Wealth" [EXACTLY]!

"Health Is Wealth" [EXACTLY]!

Few months ago, I had a 'mini-reunion' with several classmates from way back my elementary and high school.  You'll be surprised, half of the hours of chats we had was spent about random recalls of our classmates.  And WHAT shocked was the long list of classmates WHO have either passed away or going through their respective health issues.  The recurring sad insight for those sad demises was that 100 percent of them died NOT because of accidents OR anything that's CSI-related BUT instead, all of them passed away because of various health-related issues.   This brings me to this realization that indeed  "Health Is Wealth" [EXACTLY]📗📙📘

WHAT does all these mean?  THAT bad HEALTH costs money.  And worst, THAT bad HEALTH costs our lives.  Now, you must have heard HEALTH IS WEALTH a zillion times.  YES, that gives a big meaning to our lives as health is considered the most valuable and precious aspect of every individual's life.  Indeed, the saying HEALTH IS WEALTH means that HEALTH is the biggest wealth anybody can have💥💥💥

YES, anything can be achieved if we have GOOD HEALTH and it is NOT enough to have money alone we can make good use of WEALTH only if we have GOOD HEALTH.  BTW, GOOD HEALTH does NOT mean OR refer only to the absence of disease in the body BUT a complete physical, mental, social as well as spiritual well-being of an individual.  WHO said "A MAN TOO BUSY TO TAKE CARE OF HIS HEALTH IS LIKE A MECHANIC TOO BUSY TO TAKE CARE OF HIS TOOLS"💦💦💦

HEALTH, being soundly considered as the BIGGEST WEALTH IN LIFE, brings desired happiness, enjoyment and pleasure.  This simply implies that HEALTH strongly influences a person's capability to enjoy the WEALTH which he/she might have amassed.  Just to state the obvious, let's rattle off the benefits of being HEALTHY: 

• All-round well-being.
• Reduced chances of depression.
• Increased changes of living longer.
• Having stronger muscles and bones.  
• Achieving a reinforced immunity from illnesses.

Our takeaway:  Let's ask ourselves, WHAT is more important than my overall well-being?  WHAT's the point of grinding and 'kicking your ass damn hard' [pardon this hyperbole] if at the end of the day, you will fall prey to various illnesses?  So, WHAT's the antidote.  I am NO expert but since I embraced a 'major change' in my HEALTH and lifestyle four months ago, I've been waking up early morning everyday and walk for one full hour to catch that Vitamin D from the early morning sunlight.  Yes, I have embraced the fact that HEALTH IS WEALTH😁😁😁

Yes, Friendship Breakups Can Be That Bad

Yes, Friendship Breakups Can Be That Bad

Yes, Friendship Breakups Can Be That Bad.  We might think this is NOT worth to be our thread today BUT me thinks this discussion thread deserves as much space as relationships because in fact and in truth, I'm quite sure that there are more friendships than relationships all rolled into one.  And let us NOT belittle the consequence and ramifications of FRIENDSHIP BREAKUPs because it could be as impactful as worst case scenarios we dread📗📙📘

Numbers DON'T lie.  In the U.S. alone, a recent study showed that 86% of teenagers in the U.S. have experienced various levels of friendship breakups.  Though we tend to think of BAD breakups as the end of romantic relationships, losing a friend , especially one WHO has been close to you, can be just as hard.  Research into attachment can help us make sense of WHY a friendship breakup can be devastating💢💢💢

I remember, as children, our most important relationships are with our parents OR caregivers. BUT during adolescence this changes.  This part of our genetic design, readying us to grow up and build adult lives independent of our parents.  We shift the person we most trust, rely on, and seek intimate contact with, to someone WHO is a romantic partner OR even a best friend.  A bond with a friend, your companion, confidante and co-traveller through big changes as you enter adulthood can be stronger than any other bond💦💦💦

In particular, women in particular tend to discuss personal issues with friends more than they do with family.  HOW often do we hear that friends provide ongoing stability even WHEN romantic relationships might come and go.  Having a BEST FRIEND is an important part of our healthy development.  So, it's NO wonder that it can rock your world if things go wrong with that person.  It can be especially disorienting IF you DIDN'T see it coming.  Even recent researches show that the most common method of ending a FRIENDSHIP is by avoidance, NOT addressing the issues involved.  Indeed, this can be a shock and the feeling of being rejected can hurt as much as physical pain😖😖😖

WHAT befuddles me is WHY do FRIENDSHIPS breakup?  Studies show that the biggest reasons for FRIENDSHIPS ending in young adulthood are physical separation, making new friends which replace old ones, growing to dislike the friend and interference due to dating OR marriage.  Visually imagine that scenario where there are three people and you're in the middle between the guy courting you and your bestie.  WHEN you come to terms with the guy courting you, literally, you significantly orbit much closer to him, widening that gap and distance between you and your bestie.  BUT FRIENDSHIPS DON'T have to end over changes like this, if you can try to empathize with WHAT your friend is going through rather than judging them OR taking it personally💥💥💥

Fear, Uncertainty & Doubt [FUD]

Fear, Uncertainty & Doubt [FUD]

These days, the clouds are getting gloomier and the horizons out there are getting bleaker than bleak.  WHY?  Let's blame it on Fear, Uncertainty & Doubt [FUD].  Years back, the decentralized cryptocurrency now popularly called as the BITCOIN was lording it off way beyond and atop the financial market yet beyond the arms of regulators📗📙📘

As we move in our daily grinds, we might go through more rough patches and losses would often taken you aback, sometimes leaving you to question what are you here for.  In the real world, however, 'FUD' is considered part of a salesperson's toolbox.  Like, in bad faith, one can sow FEAR to a competitor [either in business OR in life] in order to 'win over' a prized plum.  On the other hand, FUD can be leveraged in good faith though💧💧💧

Problem is, FUD is being aggressively leveraged in social media.  Take along the millions of trolls WHERE people and organizations WHO fear the inevitable devaluation OR demise of their own competing investments, knowledge, reputation OR expertise.  As FUD attempts to persuade current and prospective customers of the superiority of a product by promoting false and more often ambiguous and unverified claims about a similar product or service offered by another entity OR organization❗❗❗

WHAT becomes quite disgusting is WHEN FUD is leveraged with an ill intent.  WHY besmirch or destroy the reputation of another person just to serve your self-centered ill intentions?  I did come across unfortunate instances within and between peer groups where one party would pull you towards them and detach you farther away from another 'option'💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  NOT everything in life is dainty and pure.  In the real world, both bad faith and ill intentions do exist, unfortunately.  PERCEPTIONs are the common target with the unfortunate intention of distorting or even 'REWRITING' the truth, the real score.  It all boils down to our own 'judgment call' in validating such information instead of accepting things hook, line and sinker.  BUT let us NOT lose sight of the fact that FUD is very much within our control, regardless if somethings borders on FEAR, UNCERTAINTY Or DOUBT❎❎❎

Patience Helps, Seriously.

Patience Helps, Seriously.

I live in a metropolis WHERE its traffic gridlock is part and parcel of daily life for 363 days a year.  That exempts 2 days per year because there are 2 bank holidays WHERE at least 50% of the metro population is out there in the countryside.  Other than those 2 bank holidays, you need to have that embedded Patience if you need to step out of your home and drive out in the streets.  That explains WHY this morning, I had to set my alarm clock to wake me up @430am because I need to drive out today💥💥💥

BUT seriously, the issue of PATIENCE gets into the  picture happens especially WHEN we end up asking ourselves these questions:

WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITH MY LIFE?

WHAT REALLY MATTERS TO ME?

HOW WILL I LEAVE MY MARK?

These questions can fill us with hope, inspiration and direction WHEN we have some sense of WHAT the answers may be.  And IF we DON'T, they can fill us with confusion, frustration, name it, even irritation💧💧💧

Leading a life with PURPOSE or making an enduring commitment to contributing to the broader world in personally meaningful ways, is associated with a range of benefits including better physical health, enhanced psychological well-being, superior academic achievement, and enriched social connections.  Challenge is, before young people can identify a PURPOSE, they need to engage in a process of self-exploration📘📙📗

Experts tell us that searching for a PURPOSE in life is NOT often studied BUT WHEN it has been, psychologists found it to be a source of stress and anxiety, especially WHEN it feels like everyone else has all it figured out.  This is when PATIENCE and PURPOSE go hand in hand.  As PATIENCE is the ability to stay actively engaged in working toward a goal without become frustrated, patiently pursuing PURPOSE does NOT mean sitting and waiting at all💦💦💦

Our takeaway:  Listening from the tons of stories when PATIENCE pops-up as part of the equation, it means engaging in the personal reflection and intentional conversations that help us figure out HOW we want to contribute to the broader world without feeling rushed OR hurried.  Accepting that the search is a long-term endeavor can help us cultivate our purpose in a more efficient and growth-supporting way.  In fact, experts tell us that practicing PATIENCE may lead us towards a better search of our PURPOSE💙💛💚

Going Against The Odds

Going Against The Odds

I believe this is a GIVEN.  Before you make a choice, you usually evaluate the odds.  As any rational thinking person, no one would be willing to do something if the chance of succeeding will be low.  Otherwise, that's Going Against The Odds.  Truth is, however, it's all about HOW you perceive your likelihood of success.  So, ironically, if you want to be successful, you need to be Going Against The Odds.  WHY?  Because, it is a GIVEN that success rarely comes without any challenges OR hurdles📗📙📘

So, probably, the question we're staring right now is HOW to succeed when we're Going Against The Odds.  Through the years, I would come across individuals WHO rose from anonymity and the depths of despair to become a scion of success and inspiration.  These people would eventually succeed WHEN the odds are stacked against them WHEN the CHIPS ARE DOWN and all seem lost.  Of course this is an optimistic view of things because this kind of success is sweeter than anything else💦💦💦

So, HOW often when we're Going Against The Odds, we would sometimes GIVE UP [sometimes so easily].  YES, people GIVE UP so easily WHEN the going gets tough because they are afraid of FAILURE.  We all come across a point in our lives WHEN we fail numerous times and NOTHING we do seems to work for us.  These are the times WHEN we have to push ourselves the hardest and tap into our mental strength to see those FAILURES eventually become a success.  YES, it takes donkey years to think POSITIVELY💥💥💥

True, behind the scenes, it takes a hell lot of HARD WORK involved and it is something that people are afraid WHEN we have to push towards our dreams.  Sadly, NO ONE is willing to put in the required time, effort and patience to endure the hardships.  Until all people are willingly going to accept the fact that NOTHING comes without a price, Going Against The Odds will be recurring more often than it is now.  UNTIL then, let's set expectations that there will be fewer success stories and more people listening to them.  If you think you have little time to develop your mental strength [for whatever reasons], think about it.  We were all given equal number of hours, minutes and seconds per day, so it's only a matter of some utilizing it to its best while others just NOT being able to manage it properly💧💧💧

Our takeaway: Reality is that, more often than NOT, we tend to GIVE UP because we seem to be surrounded by discouraging emotions and even people [even some with good intentions].  BUT, hearing NEGATIVE things about our capabilities and that too on a consistent basis can lead many of us to actually believe in them and hence becoming weak enough to GIVE UP easily, sometimes even without trying.  So, Going Against The Odds should be our mantra from hereon😌😌😌

Is CONSISTENCY An Issue?

Is CONSISTENCY An Issue?

Is CONSISTENCY An Issue?  Me thinks, it is a legitimate issue.  As we all know, some of us prefer to take SMALL STEPS towards achieving our goal[s] in life.  Others would prefer taking BIG STEPS with the same end view of achieving the goals in life.  WHERE's the disconnect?  It lies in the fact that regardless whether we opt for the SMALL STEPS or instead the BIG STEPS, many of us are somewhat guilty of INCONSISTENCY.  WHEN things become sporadic OR worse, WHEN randomness seem to become more as the default, then there is a gaping hole right in the midst of things.  And that confirms that CONSISTENCY is an issue📗📙📘

The truth is, for many people, CONSISTENCY can be a struggle.  Life's UPs and DOWNs and that's besides distractions and lack of motivation often hinder their ability to stay CONSISTENT.  BUT the good news is that CONSISTENCY is a skill that can be mastered with a practice, which personally, I simply did it in REPETITION, with CONSISTENCY.  So, the nagging question to us all is HOW TO BE CONSISTENT DAILY.  CONSISTENCY is a multifaceted concept that manifests differently in various situations.  In general, CONSISTENCY refers to putting forth a CONSISTENT effort day in and day out regardless of reasons💥💥💥

CONSISTENCY implies a commitment to follow through on plans and take action CONSISTENTLY to achieve the desired outcomes.  CONSISTENCY can be applied in various domains in life.  And to achieve personal goals and maintain relationships, CONSISTENCY is the key.  CONSISTENCY is NOT about being at your best every single day BUT rather striving to do our best everyday💧💧💧

So, CONSISTENCY is NOT about being at your level best every single day BUT rather striving to do our best each day.  It involves recognizing that you may face challenges and setbacks BUT still having that determination to stay CONSISTENT in your efforts.  BUT for us to move forward, let us align with the definition of CONSISTENCY, which is defined as the act of maintaining a REGULAR + STEADY effort OVER SOMETHING OVER SOMETIME😃😃😃

Our takeaway:  If at all, let us NOT be likened to the randomness of crossword puzzles because the importance of CONSISTENCY extends and spans across all areas of our life.  CONSISTENCY is crucial for success, whether it's on our personal relationships, academic pursuits or professional endeavors.  CONSISTENCY allows you to build TRUST + CREDIBILITY with others, as they can rely on you to deliver on your commitments on a CONSISTENT basis.  It also helps you develop a SENSE OF DISCIPLINE and perseverance WHICH are essential traits for long-term success.  So, IS CONSISTENCY [still] AN ISSUE?  It is very much, dude❗❗❗