It's The Name In Front That Matters [NOT The Name At The Back]

It's The Name In Front That Matters [NOT The Name At The Back]

The past two months, I've been tracking [sometimes 5 to 10 times a day] updates with regard the demand of NBA superstar Damian Lillard to get traded to MIAMI HEAT [which the NBA Commissioner stomped down, stating that contractually, a player CANNOT dictate WHERE TO GO at his own whim].  It's The Name In Front That Matters [NOT The Name At The Back].  When I sat down for my morning coffee today, Lillard was traded by his PORTLAND Team NOT to MIAMI HEAT but to the MILWAUKEE BUCKS.  Indeed, as they say day-in day-out, NBA is a business

In fact, to state that NBA is a business is an understatement.  BUT we won't waste precious time on that fact.   Truth is, It's The Name In Front That Matters [NOT The Name At The Back].  Like it or NOT, we are frequently judged by the name we are associated with.  Could be your surname associated with your family.  Could be your employer associating you with the organization

Without breaching data privacy, I have relatives who are 'filthy rich' but throughout their generations, they have remained as humble and even incognito, living life as very ordinary folks.   Back to MIAMI HEAT, it is their vaunted CULTURE that is either the source of envy or enmity.  WHY?  No less than their Filipino-American Coach Erik Spoelstra said:  MIAMI CULTURE IS NOT FOR EVERYBODY

So, It's The Name In Front That Matters [NOT The Name At The Back].  Even in Sicily, Italy, that CULTURE thing is spelled O-M-E-R-T-A which refers to their unwritten code or policy of KEEPING SILENT about crimes and refusing to cooperate with the police.  Obviously, this is a stretch❎❎❎

So, what's in it for us then?  Frankly, we got to protect the untainted name we are associated with, be it our FAMILY NAME or the ORGANIZATION we're associated with because you could be a STAR or a FLOP but It's The Name In Front That Matters [NOT The Name At The Back].  Swinging back to your personal life, whether you are that GOOD or you end up that disgustingly BAD, undoubtedly you will drag the NAME of your partner/spouse and your family UP or DOWN, depending on the trajectory coming out from the consequences of WHAT YOU ARE or WHAT YOU DID❗❗❗

You Can't Take Cubs Unless You Enter The Tiger's Den

You Can't Take Cubs Unless You Enter The Tiger's Den

Some beliefs may not be heard widespread but once it spills right on your nose, you DON'T need to lift a finger at all like when we hear that You Can't Take Cubs Unless You Enter The Tiger's Den because by itself, that's a mouthful given the survival challenges we have in life💊💊💊

I remember in my very first foray in the rough and tumble games of the corporate world, before I knew it, I was rubbing elbows with industry experts and gurus who were then hobnobbing with dyed-in-the-wool expats from our global headquarters at The Hague.  Yet, there I was, twiddling my thumbs and sometimes pressing my arms, asking myself if this is the reality, that I finally managed to create a breakthrough in my arduous climb into the prestigious confines of corporate life📙📘📗

Before anything else though, allow me to credit YASHAR KAFI, an American transformational guru, for the above poster because that sums up everything the whole nine yards can cover, in fact.  BUT what is often missed is that that TIGER'S CUB [this is NOT a typo] is a tough nut to crack, with a very high mortality rate that can deter even the most ambitious TIGER you can be💎💎💎

In fact, to state that you will get bruised will be a gross understatement because it is akin to a NO MAN'S LAND where no quarters are given.  And if you though you can cling to a LIFELINE there, better digest all the food you can eat up because you got to buttress your arsenal and get braced for the toughest challenge you can face up❎❎❎

Now, not to scare the weaker ones, what is the likely outcome of a typical attempt of someone who wants to join the 'TIGER CUB'?  Sadly, there is at least a 50% probability that you would be clobbered and frankly, devoured by the predator kings in the wilderness.  So what's our FIX to avoid and avert that debacle?  Get into a no nonsense regimen that will lead you to that unassailable readiness who can have a fighting chance to survive, if NOT to prevail.  BUT who knows❓❓❓

Got To Earn Your Stripes

Got To Earn Your Stripes

I heard this admission a few times in the past. It took them days and weeks to figure out how to turn on the CAPS LOCK on the smartphone.  That probably seems like a very small deal and you would be right.  No one cares when writing a text that you use proper capitalization and most of time, it will AUTOCORRECT for you.  That's when you realize you Got To Earn Your Stripes📗📙📘

Let's face it.  Given the atrocious grammar 'crimes' we have seen on social media these days, being unable to type a capital A in the middle of the sentence hardly seems like much to fuss about.  So, what's the fuss?  Because we have heard many dropouts [especially in the United States] who are now making millions of dollars a year with an APP he created while bored in a science class.  Indeed, it is difficult to fathom that level of success coming from the youngsters.  But instead if nitpicking, let's admit it, every generation has its unique qualities that continue to astound us as they Earned their Stripes way ahead💵💷💴

Let's step back and appreciate some of the obvious differences of today's generations.  For one thing, they continue to live with technology on a modern scale.  Ask around who has ever seen abacus, whew!  We should vividly remember the early days of the internet.  I remember I was billetted in a 5-star hotel in Mumbai which I called 'HOME' for about less than a year and there I was, patiently connecting to the internet via a 64kb modem connection.  But if there's something amiss these days, it is the fact that today's generation never feel that they Got To Earn their Stripes [because they got it] !@##$%❓❓❓

Not only have Millennials and Post-Millennials embraced technology, they have made it entirely their own and created a new economy and way of life.  So, have they Gotten Their Stripes?  For years now, we have come across articles and stories and tons and tons of opinion pieces in social media claiming that the modern generation is self-centered, uncaring and cynical❗❗❗

But from my limited vantage point, I see the opposite as true.  LIke Gen Z is opened to a wider view of the world and more connected to people from all walks of life.  Back to our life, I hope we never depart from this old-school of thought that we Got To Earn our Stripes because that's what it is in life❎❎❎

Sifting Through The Noise

Sifting Through The Noise

Today, regardless your age, gender, culture or work/occupation, let's face it, even if you DON'T access social media, very likely, you did use it if NOT heavily.  And Sifting Through The Noise means we're able to extract and process contextually relevant information, and NOT end up with the FAKE NEWS.  Pitifully, while we know what FAKE NEWS is, how many of us have the tools to initiate a FACT CHECK?  Because that exactly is Sifting Through The Noise💎💎💎

And like it or NOT, even the most stubborn and hesitant ones, they're now becoming the latest 'CONVERTS' in SLACKTIVISM, which Google defines as "that practice of supporting a cause either via social media or online petitions, characterized as involving VERY LITTLE effort or commitment.  Ironically, SLACKTIVISM adds up to all the The Noise we'd like to sift through.  Now, we have a 'ballgame', whew❗❗❗

With the advent of social media and our human tendencies to post ANYTHING and EVERYTHING, Sifting Through The Noise has evolved to become a challenge as steep as the challenging slopes of Mount Everest.  But the bigger question looming over us is, how do we engage n social media?  As an avid blogger?  An FB aficionado with hundreds of friends?  A forum junkie?  A Twitter Re-twitter OR a lurker, reading and absorbing thoughts❓❓❓

Even good BUGS versus bad BUGS can mix up things.  It's either an application is getting BUGGY or literally, it may get related to baby strollers [as many refer to it as BUGGIES].  Where's the beef here?  It's because what is noise to one may be gold to another.  In short, CONTEXT IS KING here when determining the relevance of the myriad of information we're Sifting Through.  And when we relate all these to call centers, they even ended up with transcription services that convert calls to unstructured texts.  And very obviously, even in the business world, that adds up to MORE NOISE❎❎❎

So what's our FIX?  Numero uno, you need to assess the volume of noise that you are Sifting Through.  If its a high volume one, that is way too much for you to handle and it can CONSUME YOU and EAT YOU up.  Numero dos, once you have assessed the volume of NOISE, cut it down to a manageable one.  You DON'T one to end up Sifting Through The Noise 24x7.  Numero tres, CHOOSE YOUR BATTLES when Sifting Through The Noise📗📙📘

Sure Yo' Playing HARDBALL?

Sure Yo' Playing HARDBALL?

Sure Yo' Playing HARDBALL?  Go ahead by all means but before your locomotive goes chug-chug-chug, Playing HARDBALL  does NOT simply mean playing the game of HARDBALL [as against softball].  Gone are the days when, in life, you just needed to carry your weight around, railroading the hapless souls as you literally throw your weight when/wherever you want to📗📙📘

For a time, strategy became a foreign word in our life.  The fast-paced progress in our environment simply blinded many of us, believing that the traditional HARDBALL way of doing things especially for brick and mortar environments was still the norm.  Fast forward to today, it is NOT as it does NOT seem at all💴💷💵

Today, we have NO other choice but to piggy-back on the PRINCIPLES of HARDBALL crafted by the successful entrepreneurs.  First off, focus relentlessly on COMPETITIVE ADVANTAGE  If you're angling for a prestigious job in the market, look dig deep and eke out your COMPETITIVE ADVANTAGE[s]📌📌📌

In the world of the NBA, many of us [wrongly] believe that NBA is sports, period.  Dude, it is NOT.  Instead, NBA is a business.  When they get into the messy trade negotiations, we would realize that NBA IS A BUSINESS!  Sure, you can see flashes of loyalty [like the late Kobe Bryant] who played only for the LA Lakers till his retirement and demise [RIP]❎❎❎

And this is NOT limited to physicality.  Today's top chess super grandmasters like Magnus Carlsen play HARDBALL like the palm of their hands.  They know well enough when to ATTACK & ATTACK and when it's time for a truce and offer a game that looks 'drawish' materially and positive-wise.  Sure Yo' playing HARDBALL❓❓❓

Growth Isn't Always Linear

Growth Isn't Always Linear

What is GROWTH?  Oh c'mon, you might shrug this off as a boring topic, like those Economics subjects we had in the university. BUT hey, GROWTH is as relevant for us to discuss as your name because majority of us [that included me in the past] firmly believed that to really grow, it has to be exponentially going up up and away BUT Growth Isn't Always Linear especially in life.  WHEN we're sometimes stuck in the mud [coming from Point A to Point B], that could really be GROWTH because you did progress and move from Point A to Point B.  Let's even take a worst case scenario where before you were a Dentist in your native third world country [and there's NOTHING wrong about that] and when you became a U.S. immigrant, your job role is that of a dental assistant.  BTW, I'm referring to my classmate since our elementary years.  Today, he runs a burgeoning dental clinic near Beverly Hills in California💎💎💎

Indeed, it is easy to think of personal GROWTH as a series of LINEAR decisions, a process of taking one clear-cut step after the other, in a predictable and sensible way.  We have seen working professionals who left their current employer 'FOR GREENER PASTURES' only to knock on his/her former employer's doors a few years later seeking to rejoin the organization he/she left.  Unfortunately, the statement "TWO STEPS FORWARD, ONE STEP BACK" is usually a negative term to describe someone who is having trouble making progress💵💷💶

Thing is, there is a GROWTH PROCESS all of us need to go through.  And I'd like to think of it as a forward motion and a primary ingredient in our SAUCE OF LIFE.  Forward motion propelling our bodies and minds to grow steadily toward the future we desire and dream of.  In brief, it means PROGRESS and not PERFECTION.  It means that instead of grumbling or feeling guilty about a misstep, you can still come out ahead by putting your head down and push forward.  John Quincy Adams, the 6th President of the United States was widely quoted: "PATIENCE AND PERSEVERANCE HAVE A MAGICAL EFFECT BEFORE WHICH DIFFICULTIES DISAPPEAR AND OBSTACLES VANISH"📗📙📘

When we combine a positive future outlook with the obstacles of reality and the challenges these obstacles present, we become able to be more selective in our pursuit of our goals and eventually become more confident in our GROWTH.  Those PEAKS and VALLEYS and LEAPS and STUMBLES become less daunting💎💎💎

"TWO STEPS FORWARD, ONE STEP BACK" becomes a way to measure the non-LINEAR nature of our GROWTH.  A forward motion we all experience and one I would aggressively 'HARD SELL' to each of you my readers to consider embracing this mindset because for all we know, it could become a game-changer, something that will tilt the final outcome of our journey either way, all because GROWTH ISN'T ALWAYS LINEAR✅✅✅

As Long As The Story Goes, There Goes The Smoke

As Long As The Story Goes, There Goes The Smoke

Imagine your partner/spouse suddenly stops responding to your SMS and text messages or worse, returning your calls.  WHAT if they 'GHOST' you without giving you any explanation or even a heads-up if something was either 'brewing' or simply 'NOT OK'?  As Long As The Story Goes, There Goes The Smoke📙📗📘

 

As cruel as it seems, you end up with having NO choice but to accept that they DON'T want to be in a relationship with you anymore.  BUT hey, is that fair?  That's grossly UNFAIR!  It's true in an ideal scenario, your partner/spouse would have given you CLOSURE.  BUT let's face it, in real life, that just does NOT always happen in real life💎💎💎

True, some relationships end so abruptly, leaving hapless and helpless people stuck and struggling to move on from the breakup of NOT getting a decent CLOSURE.  BUT c'mon, let's align, what is CLOSURE?  More importantly, why is CLOSURE important after a breakup?  HOW to ask for a CLOSURE in a relationship and WHAT IF your ex refuses to give it to you?   As cruel as it seems, Arie Krugalankski came up with that CLOSURE jargon more than three decades ago.  He referred to a need by an individual to find a firm answer so that they DON'T have to live with ambiguity💵💶💴

The bigger question bogging some of us is:  IS CLOSURE NECESSARY WHEN RELATIONSHIP ENDS?  Indeed, getting CLOSURE is really important when a relationship ends.  Because when your partner decides to end the relationship without giving you the appropriate CLOSURE, they rob you of your RIGHT TO KNOW the reason WHY they did it💎💎💎

Now let's brace for the scenario where you won't get CLOSURE.  Primero, accept that you WON'T get that and while CLOSURE is essential, understand that no amount of apology will make them come back.  So, it's just a good idea to STOP blaming yourself.  LET GO of self-pity and start taking care of yourself.  And DISTANCE yourself from anything that will remind you of your EX✅✅✅

How Often You're HEMING And HAWING?

How Often You're HEMING And HAWING?

Just to ensure we're all on the same page, HEMING And HAWING is meant here for those moments of HESITATION we have had.  So, the question I'll throw back to you is How Often You're HEMING And HAWING?  If you would admit that you're HEMING And HAWING for roughly 20% or more of those moments when you need to decide, then we got an issue here💎💎💎

So, you might throw back the question to me.  What triggers us to be HEMING And HAWING?  Oh oh oh, there are numerous exceptions where we are HEMING And HAWING, sometimes with valid and legitimate reasons that's causing us to HOLD BACK whereas, let's admit it, there are times when we're HEMING And HAWING simply because we're dragging our feet [for reasons more often no one else is aware as to why we're dragging things].  The unfortunate instances when we seem to be unconsciously HEMING And HAWING, that needs to be rectified ASAP💴💶💵

On the other hand, HEMING And HAWING really makes sense as part of your decision-making process [and that process CAN'T just be short-circuited].  BUT the wild card in these equations is the ELEMENT OF TIME.  You can't just be twiddling your thumbs as a mannerism if there are consequences and implications if your formulated DECISION happens way beyond a critical timeline.  In brief, this takes a bit of a BALANCING ACT📙📗📘

I remember many times in the past, I had to arrive at decisions that were either game-changers or life-changing.  And on those notes, I kept reminding myself that I just CAN'T HEMING And HAWING simply because I was running through things based on timelines that were NOT totally within my control.  At hindsight, what could have happened if I kept HEMING And HAWING❓❓❓

Frankly, many who ended up HEMING And HAWING several times in the past did not commit it in bad faith but they just [wrongly] thought that they had all the time in world.  Not to scare the guilty parties but very likely, for those who kept HEMING And HAWING, you had to endure the implications of LOST OPPORTUNITIES, whether it's in school, at the job market, at your business industry or even at your favorite home store [like IKEA] if they just went through a major sales campaign earmarking your favorite home furniture with cut-throat discounts.  For brevity, LOST OPPORTUNITIES are to be equated with $$$$$$ because most, if NOT all, translates to it❗❗❗

When A Problem Is NOT A Problem

When A Problem Is NOT A Problem

Let's face it.  Problems that we DON'T deal with will ultimately wear us down in the end.  Do we remember instances in the past when we realized that a problem at hand is NOT really our very own problem?  That's When A Problem Is NOT A Problem.  At the height of your emotions, you might even bang your head on the wall When A Problem Is NOT A Problem💎💎💎

Heard about PROBLEM STATEMENTS?  Why do we need to craft that?  Simple.  Because PROBLEMS need to be defined in concrete terms.  Let's think about it.  Identifying a PROBLEM  is more important than the solution.  And sometimes, the PROBLEM definition may be nothing more than the art of asking the right questions at the right time💵💴💶

And quite often, what we fail to realize when we did not clearly crystallize the 'PROBLEM' at hand, we would fail to realize that what we have are ISSUES and NOT PROBLEMS.  It happens quite frequently.  We built that momentum for an ongoing project.  Then we get excited to embrace new challenges and we've visualized how that END OF THE ROAD looks like.  Then all of a sudden, you HIT A WALL📘📙📗

It's true, major hurdles are disheartening and they're that unavoidable.  BUT the way we engage with and think about the issue at hand will likely affect your approach and ability to address that issue.  The frustrating part in a debacle like this is when you thought you got a PROBLEM at hand✅✅✅

In a nutshell, NOT ALL PROBLEMS ARE PROBLEMS.  There are numerous cases when what we have at hand is a difficult situation we need to face and the only option is to face, co-exist and manage the situation but really NOT resolving a situation if by itself it is NOT a problem.  This scenario could happen to couples who recently settled down and upon settling down, either spouse/partner realized that he/she CANNOT accept the kind of character or behavior or even values of his/her new spouse/partner.  Where you can live with it, then that becomes the closure of the issue at hand.  Bottomline, validate When A Problem Is NOT A Problem❗❗❗

When There's Too Much Smoke

When There's Too Much Smoke

The most overused expression is:  WHERE THERE'S SMOKE, THERE'S FIRE.  Fine.  BUT When There's Too Much Smoke, what could it mean?  Simple.  It is quite safe to conclude that there's TOO MUCH FIRE causing When There's Too Much Smoke.  When we swing over to our life, it is akin to painting a scenario where one is getting overwhelmed with problems piling up💎💎💎

Exception is the Vatican's Sistine Chapel because when a White Smoke billows out from its chimney, that's when Catholics jump and rejoice because it is a confirmation that a new Pope has been elected by the College of Cardinals.  So, that's the only exception.  Else, everywhere else, SMOKE is one of the most common tell-tale signs that things are NOT that good in a particular situation💵💶💴

The major hullaballo happens when the smoke spreading out are NOT just billows of smoke but quite a volume.  In life, When There's Too Much Smoke, it could either mean one is in the middle of a life-changing situation or things are developing that it may even become a GAME CHANGER, which means, either things will get better OR things will simply turn south and get worse📗📙📘

If it's a vehicle with heavy smoke, grab your fire extinguisher because as in life, you will be in DAMAGE CONTROL mode by then.  While you are fighting the fire, your objective becomes more modest as you will attempt to contain or limit the damage, the havoc that will be wrought by that heavy smoke.  That's When There's Too Much Smoke pushes you to the edge in life❗❗❗

Thing is, even When There's Too Much Smoke you just DON'T give up because there remains a glimmer of hope that you can still turn around things.  BUT the lesson in life here is that, similar to building facilities, you got to have a SMOKE DETECTOR embedded deeply within you such that at the first instance of the smoke, you get alerted,  For you to make your move when you're almost suffocating with the heavy smoke, whatever you can do might be TOO LITTLE TOO LATE❎❎❎