That Jolt In Life

That Jolt In Life

Who needs That Jolt In Life?  Many of us will likely shrug their shoulders and just shun off that need for That Jolt In Life.  In real life, however, That Jolt In Life is not even a choice.  Many times in life, that jolt just kicks in and indeed That Jolt In Life happens, not as our choice at all.  So, how does That Jolt In Life happen❓❓❓

BTW, That Jolt In Life comes in different shapes and forms.  It could be as simple as our grocery experience at the supermarket.  WHEN inflation goes up and local prices just shoot up, That is a Jolt In Life.  WHEN Covid pandemic hit is, That was Jolt In Life,  WHEN you've been in the job market for quite sometime and still waiting for that job offer you're angling, That is another Jolt In Life.  WHEN you continue to struggle in your day-to-day life [despite all the hard work you're putting up], That is another Jolt In Life.  God forbid, when you've been medically ill, off and on, That is another Jolt In Life📌📌📌

When you get Jolted with all the challenges in life, what else is the best way to admit that getting Jolted In Life is [not our choice though] our very WAKEUP CALL to rectify things before it goes from bad to worse.  The mother of all blunders in life [which I have witnessed on a first-person account] is that some really DON'T get jolted despite the severity of their current situation⏳⏳⏳

It is both lamentable and pitiful if despite that 'WAKEUP CALL' now confronting us, we tend to be in a STATE of DENIAL.  Instead, we shrug it off as just a hiccup that will die its natural death the next day.  But hey dude, there are very few problems that do die a natural death.  And if there are such that dissipate in thin air, it could be something as petty as a foul odor.  BUT that's not a problem in the first place.  Worse, some of us tend to cloak a problem so that, superficially, he can't get impacted but again, that's hardly scratching the surface because definitely, it will haunt you back, trust me

Pun not intended, ironically, that JOLT IN LIFE could be as simple as egging you to catch ['minimumly'] sufficient  sleep because you're losing sleep as a result of the triggers in life that are jolting you but you refuse to be JOLTED.  Dude, get both of your feet back firmly in the ground please💊💊💊

'EXPECTATION IS THE ROOT OF ALL HEARTACHE'

'EXPECTATION IS THE ROOT OF ALL HEARTACHE'

I am NOT an avid Shakesperean but allow me please to quote the great William Shakespeare that 'EXPECTATION IS THE ROOT OF ALL HEARTACHE'.  Surprisingly, despite the fact that this one-liner does NOT sound so poetic, its message really caught me by my lapels.  And I can't find a reason to disagree, realizing of late that indeed, that 'EXPECTATION is the ROOT' not just of heartaches but even relationships that have once blossomed in the past only to have a miserable end⏳⏳⏳

Akin to the plants recently planted, we tend to put so much expectations in life.  Instead of roses and romance, it's not a shocker if what you have now is NETFLIX + NACHOS.  Call it minimal effort but if in any way, those small niceties will enrich one's relationship [instead of sabotaging it], go for it dude.

Obviously, it's altogether a different thing when it involves politics or business, those moments when the negotiators on the negotiating table are hard-nosed enough.  But you'll be surprised, these negotiators have both their feet firmly on the ground such that they know the realistic expectations versus the ideal ones📌📌📌

For account managers and sales folks, their customer-facing stance is a stark difference from what reality is.  So you should NOT get surprised if most of them are constantly working under pressure, too much in fact.  Why?  Because they're NOT transparent enough to the client to admit that there's a huge and heavy burden they need to struggle just to 'deliver the goods', so to speak.  So who's at fault here?  Is it the demanding client?  No sirrrrrrs, as an account manager, you dug that deep hole yourself so you got to extricate yourself out because NO one dictated the terms except you💊💊💊

BTW, this dilemma impacts every facet of our life, especially our relationships with our spouse/partner, work supervisors/managers and even business partners.  And what's the culprit of these all?  It is our tendency to put the BEST FOOT FORWARD when in fact, doing so is NOT within your capability or at worse, it is NOT realistic enough for you to 'deliver the goods' based on terms and conditions either onerous or just not realistic from your end.  So, would you rather paint a rosy picture now even if it means you will end up as a BIG LETDOWN to the people with whom you set expectations💎💎💎

Quality Matters Over Quantity

Quality Matters Over Quantity

Who says QUANTITY is a thing of the past?  Everyone adores quantity.  Volume matters.  Even as I speak as a layman in terms of Economics, productivity is the very engine that has become the barometer of every country's economy.  But hey, hold on, we're not into macro economics but instead more about whether Quality Matters Over Quantity💎💎💎

Once we swing over to our life, QUALITY is the hands down winner over QUANTITY.  NOT because QUANTITY does NOT matter anymore [because it does, till now BTW but rather because whether you're just doing household chores or your tasks in the workplace or the background preparations before your business opens its curtains during its business hours, anytime your output raises QUALITY issues/concerns, rest assured that is a setback that will literally drive you several steps backward even after you moved forward by a step. 

Anyone belittling QUALITY and pushing it back behind must be doing a great disservice to himself because that might mean he's digging his own 'grave' because it could precipitate the "START of the END"📌📌📌

Regardless the nature of your work, while we do hear work quotas to monitor productivity at work, QUALITY now hovers over QUANTITY.  You can be the productivity leader but if your QUALITY SCORE is hugging around the cellar, that is NOT the best spot to stand now in the totem pole.  Why?  QUALITY issues may impact customer.  QUALITY may mean rework [and rework means doubling the production costs, whew].  At work. as much as you need to meet the productivity quota, push QUALITY up the totem pole of your work ethics.💊💊💊

When the pandemic hit us, logistical deliveries right at your home's doorsteps became the norm.  After two years, which logistical companies still lorded it all over the market?  Name it,  the old market players like DHL and FEDEX [instead of innovative market players like GRAB].  Why?  What's the score?  It all boiled down to Quality.  When I initiated my online order for a premium wristwatch from Singapore Airlines' KRISSHOP, I was receiving SMS updated every few days right until the very last SMS advising me that the DHL delivery van has now arrived outside my home.  Talk about QUALITY❗❗❗

How To Get Back On Track

How To Get Back On Track

Falling and Failing is NEVER  'un-normal'.  I myself I have fallen down and failed several times in my life, some of which were HARD FALLS a weaker soul would not have survived.  Even failing recurred in me many times in my life.  Alas, as the old clicke goes, "I'M STILL ALIVE AND KICKING".  So let's discuss How To Get Back On Track📗📙📘

Thing is, NEVER take NO or NON or NEIN as a show-stopper.  NO is NOT an option at all.  It really doesn't matter if you faltered or failed.  And while it's common for us to assume that habits are ALL-or-NOTHING [which means you either work out everyday OR you're sedentary for the rest of your life], a crooked thinking like this cam be dangerous and prevent us from moving on.

Some got misguided, in fact, by purposely missing out one opportunity, [wrongly] thinking for example by NOT working out for a day WON'T affect habit formation.  Studies have proven that wrong,  Instead, studies tell us that we should endeavor working towards avoiding the second missed opportunity. Avoiding a 'second mistake' is really key for us NOT to fall in the same trap again

The key here is that we should NEVER skip a habit twice.  Consistency is more important than perfection, in fact.  Just DON'T lose time or energy mulling over the missed opportunity.  Instead, focus your mind on getting back on track.  STARTING EASY is another simple proven trick as confirmed in studies.  If for example your goal is to implement a new workout regime into your routine, you should aim for a behavior that has the least friction. 

A very common mistake we do is trying to do a 'CATCH UP'.  Example, if you skipped to work out for a day, the next day, you might work out for a period twice as long as you normally would.  CAREFUL!  That could backfire as you're adding MORE FRICTION to a behavior that is NOT yet a habit.  So, KEEP IT SIMPLE and START SMALL as that should ease up things for you to GET BACK ON TRACK with much lesser odds❗❗❗

Is Your Life 'ON A DOWNSLOPE'

Is Your Life 'ON A DOWNSLOPE'

Anything that downslope offers us the most scenic shots ever, where any point is a vantage point where that downslope scenery will capture your attention at least during those fleeting moments.  EXCEPT if we start discussing things if Your Life is 'ON A DOWNSLOPE', skidding and running downhill on a tailspin.  When that happens, the very next ACTION you take will dictate your fate, that is, whether you will end up SAFE or worse, end on something tragic💎💎💎

Prior to the pandemic when we would drive to the countryside quite often, once we get into those DOWNSLOPEs, as a driver, it offers me one of those elusive perks only someone seated on the car's front seat will get to ever enjoy.  But alas, sometimes my passengers [seated at the back seat] would confess that NERVOUSNESS creeps in those moments📀📀📀

Unlike road driving though, in life, we are deprived of such helpful signages.  No one AS IN no one will ever alert you that your life is skidding.  It's for you to figure it out and quite instantly, figure out how to mitigate the risks of that DOWNSLOPE direction.  You can leverage on your HELPLINES but the bottom line is, with you behind the steering wheel, your fate [and as always, the fate of your passengers [BTW, they are your immediate family members]] will all hinge on the next sequence of actions you will take and that includes the TIMELINESS + ACCURACY of your action.  There's just NO ROOM FOR ERROR

God forbid, it's just unavoidable in life when sometimes emergencies may hit us.  And that's when you retrieve your CHEAT SHEET as you scramble to take equally emergency measures.  Health and financials are our most common recurring 'enemies' but rather than hark on them [as that will be an exercise in futility], the only recourse for us is to be in FULL CONTROL of things, period💹💹💹

As this poster goes, LIFE can NEVER be PERFECT.  But it's for us to initiate all the tweaks and fine-tune things to get into near-perfect state.  And while the car drivers have the luxury of those signages alerting them, be forewarned that there are NO signages in life that will alert you.  You're on your own, even if you are skidding ON A DOWNSLOPE🔍🔍🔍

Life Can Fly On A Single Engine [Just Like The QANTAS Flight]

Life Can Fly On A Single Engine [Just Like The QANTAS Flight] 

Browsing through the newswire pages, I got almost floored reading that that Qantas flight from Auckland to Sydney safely landed even with one engine down.  Swinging back to our life, I though Life can indeed fly on a single engine [note:  FAA requires flights to take flight on two engines because that much power is needed during takeoffs] 🔋🔋🔋

This is where we can draw a parallelism between these airborne flights and life itself.  As much as the FAA [Federal Aviation Administration] requires aircraft to takeoff with two engines, in life as well, from the time the infant is born until his/her growing-up years, it's like his/her life requires two engines as well [that's the child's parents guiding every step of the way [till the child can stand on his/her own feet]. Indeed this is the parallelism between that airborne aircraft and the child, needing at least one engine💊💊💊

Similar to the FAA's approval that aircraft can land even with a single engine, in life, once YOU'RE ON YOUR OWN, YOU'RE ON YOUR OWN.  Yes, 'tis true that from time to time you can radio for HELP [or even initiate a MAYDAY Call], but at the end of the day,  once YOU'RE ON YOUR OWN, YOU'RE ON YOUR OWN📌📌📌

Now, lest I be accused of being racist, the [HARSH] truth is that there are cultures were family structures are tightly-knit wherein it's very common to see all under one roof, the original family inclusive of the families of each of the children [and even the newly setup families of their third generation.  But DON'T get me wrong as there is NOTHING wrong per se except that HOW CAN THE BIRDS LEARN TO FLY THEIR WINGS [if they continue to be UNDER THE WINGS of the parents and even grandparents]

So, your life can be likened to that Qantas flight whose second engine just conked out in the middle of the high seas while UP THERE.  In life, you will be traversing immense sheets of waters all by yourself.   UP THERE, all you will need is your INNER COMPASS plus your unwavering resolve to get through all the way down to the FINISH LINE.  Replicate the deft maneuvering of that Qantas pilot who made sure the flight landed safely, with all passengers unscathed❗❗❗

Coping With Loneliness

Coping With Loneliness

By itself, loneliness is NOT a medical condition or illness.  Instead, it is a casual manifestation caused by either specific triggers or prevailing circumstances.  Nevertheless, Coping With Loneliness deserves space in our discussion because it is something pervasive and prevalent regardless of one's current state in life💡💡💡

But the fact that loneliness is confirmed to be on the rise [especially when the recent pandemic hit us all].  And contrary to the misconception that loneliness is caused by being alone, per se, that is not the case.  On the other hand, solitude [or being alone] can actually be enjoyable and enriching, and in the end, helping us to recharge.  But once our social needs are NOT met, that's when loneliness may creep in📌📌📌

While everyone can experience Loneliness from time to time, it's NOT something for us to ignore.  Like all difficult emotions, it can be a sign that something is just NOT right.  The RED FLAG arises is if loneliness becomes a chronic problem. By then, such a situation may even wreak havoc on one's health and well-being.  The fix here is to explore all possible courses of action dependent on various variables💊💊💊

The most popular first action to take is is to reach out to one's family or [TRUSTED] friends.  The context for 'FRIENDS' here are NOT just Facebook 'FRIENDS' but rather bonafide and genuine 'FRIENDS'.  And even if reaching out means virtually, calling or texting someone you TRUST to share your vulnerable feelings is a good start to wiggle out of Loneliness.  Getting out of your home and go where people would go, like parks and malls✅✅✅

Indeed, Coping With Loneliness is all that matters.  When we're lonely, it's normal to focus on ourselves and our sorrowful feelings. But we can sometimes shift our mood by focusing instead on how to help others.  Being kind to other people has many benefits, among them, feeling more connected and in the end, that will get more appreciated❗❗❗

Asal Bapak Senang [AS LONG AS MY BOSS IS HAPPY]

Asal Bapak Senang [AS LONG AS MY BOSS IS HAPPY]

Just early this morning, I came across this Bahasa Indonesia expression, "Asal Bapak Senang" which means AS LONG AS MY BOSS IS HAPPY.  When incumbent Indonesia President Joko Widodo took over the reins from the perennially corrupt previous regimes of Indonesia, "Asal Bapak Senang" was just one battle cry out of a long list as he had to face the steep challenge of combating and arresting the widespread corruption across Indonesia.  And as the incumbent President, he was not one official easy enough to win over via the corrupt ways of the past.  And I think we laymen can pick u a lesson here from Indonesia📙📗📘

BTW, this is not to go on a reverse crusade and peddle the half-truth that we should NOT make the boss happy.  Please DON'T get me wrong.  In fact, we should always be guided with "Asal Bapak Senang"  which means AS LONG AS MY BOSS IS HAPPY.  Problem is, some of us would tend to appease our boss [or it could be our partner/spouse or our loved ones] NOT for the right reasons📌📌📌

Surely, we have heard tons and tons of CORRUPT practices everywhere.  LIKE illegitimate importers attempting to BRIBE the government customs officers.  LIKE that reckless driver who runs over a pedestrian and attempts to BRIBE the traffic officer.  LIKE those desperate to go to another country, ending up to BRIBE immigration officers [only to get offloaded from the flight manifest when their bogus documents are uncorked]💊💊💊

Diving into our life, where our relationship with our partner/spouse or loved ones matter most, let us NOT embrace this "Asal Bapak Senang"  practice which means AS LONG AS MY BOSS IS HAPPY if our intentions are less than what 'GOOD FAITH' is all about.  If it's all to appease or provide some relief from an otherwise acrimonious relationship, then let us NOT take that part because you're not scraping the bottom of the barrel with that✅✅✅

The thing is, it's not just making someone HAPPY.  It is all about doing things in GOOD FAITH, with no ulterior or underlying intentions which will only undermine that act itself of making someone HAPPY and aligned with "Asal Bapak Senang"  which means AS LONG AS MY BOSS IS HAPPY.  Bottom line is, even when making someone HAPPY, it has to be done in GOOD FAITH, with the BEST INTENTIONS❗❗❗

Choose Your Battles

Choose Your Battles

Who says we should always be 'battle ready' in life?  No sirrrrrrs.  On the contrary, we should not be bracing for battles at all.  True we got to be ready if something inimical to us arises but that should be far and few in between.  In fact, if you had the room to wiggle, embrace this age-old mantra:  Choose Your Battles.  Otherwise, DON'T court conflicts.  Shy away from potential 'powder kegs' that may just blow out to your detriment💡💡💡

Knowing which battles to fight [and maybe leaving it for another day [which you hope WON'T come]] is important enough to be successful in life itself.  If you find yourself fighting one too many battles, and worse on too many fronts, you may end up feeling drained of either a combination of mental, emotional and/or physical energy.  Worse, both your performance either at your business or at work and coupled with your relationships with your partner/spouse and/or loved ones may inevitably suffer as a result⏳⏳⏳

 Hard to Choose Your Battles but it's NO rocket science though.  Thinking that you have to fight a battle that actually belongs to someone else is a very mistake to make.  Sometimes you can get involved in another person's battle without even meaning to.  Or worse, you might be that kind of person who likes to "STICK UP FOR" your more timid BFF. Endeavor to resist falling into that TRAP at all costs💊💊💊

 Oh, I grabbed this anonymous poster because it speaks volumes.  Let's face it.  In life, we will come across all shades of personalities including the 'petty people'.  But as this poster goes, if your life is BIGGER and BETTER than those petty people, just shy off from the 'petty' ones.  NEVER stoop down to their level because they will [surely] drag you down in a dirty way not deserving of your values and persona.  And if it's someone else's battle, then someone else needs to be fighting it, not you at all💹💹💹

To quote Sun Tzu, the famous Chinese general and philosopher during the Eastern Zhou period in China, "THE WISE WARRIOR AVOIDS THE BATTLE'.  And if you're not stomped with that argument, do take a step back and look at the big picture.  And DON'T forget to ask yourself:  WHAT HAPPENS IF I LOSE THE BATTLE?  Think of the downsides, the risks.  Will you just throw out through the window all your efforts and successes in the past [and get dirtied in the mud]❓❓❓

Still Hoping For People To Change?

Still Hoping For People To Change?

Is this not a common hope?  And in reality, a common frustration?  Still Hoping For People To Change?  And BTW, there is nothing wrong to Still Hope For People To Change but here's the thing.  People are different.  But it's true, sometimes it's hard to just accept people for who they are.  How can we be at peace then with someone, faults and all?  And BTW, a whole lot of other people's behavioral manifestations could be really be so casual and petty📌📌📌

Leaving cabinet or closet doors open.  Sending spam emails.  Turning a deaf ear to dripping water from the faucet.  All these petty things, when we lump them all, it could be one big issue with someone, till the pressure builds up and things get blown right in our faces.  Hmmmm. We DON'T need to look far.  We can start with our loved ones and immediate family, our neighbors, our co-workers and even the drivers of public conveyances.  And it's fine to try to influence others in either skillful or ethical manners.  But problems arise when we lean towards contempt, fault-finding and other forms of struggle💊💊💊

Instead, we could accept them for WHO THEY ARE and for WHAT THEY ARE NOT.  And ACCEPTANCE here means that we will give up to the truth  and the reality itself.  For understandable reasons, we may NOT like it.  It could be grandiose things like, we DON'T want children to get hungry every day or it could be something personal like you're missing your parents who passed away.

But things are what they are and we can accept them while still trying to make them better, if ever that's possible.  ACCEPTANCE grounds us in what is true, which is where we have to start for any lasting effectiveness, happiness or even healing.  ACCEPTING people does NOT itself mean agreeing with them or even liking them.  We can still take on appropriate actions as we're simply accepting the reality of the other person.  We may NOT like it or you may not prefer it or worse, you might even feel sad or angry but try to dig in at a deeper level, you would [likely] realize that you are AT PEACE with it.

But if there's one thing you should NOT give up, it's HOPE.  To reach that point of a clear phase of ACCEPTANCE, try starting with with a simple direct experience like accepting the sensations of breathing.  For a few breaths, try to focus on the sense of of letting the breath be whatever it is.  Thereafter, try accepting something that's difficult to accept but alongside your breathing, try to hold this fact in a context of acceptance, and still clinging For People To Change✅✅✅