Are You 'LOCKED IN' ?

Are You 'LOCKED IN' ? 

No sirrrrs, today's piece is NOT about being 'LOCKED IN' a prison but somehow to be 'LOCKED IN' means having the very focus which a typical incarcerated person may manifest at any point in time of his waking hours.  But you might wonder, what is it in that incarcerated person that is worth emulating, if at all?

Let's swing over to the NBA and ask, why it has become such a successful commercial initiative with sponsorship revenues alone hitting $1.2 bn last year? It really boils down to the fact that 99.99% of NBA players have always been compared to dogs in the kerne;l, dogs who are so 'LOCKED IN' they'll do anything and everything to eke out a WIN whether in the regular or post season.

So, whether you are still a student now, a worker at the workplace, an entrepreneur or someone who's now into a relationship and commitment with your partner/spouse, expectations from you is no less than to be 'LOCKED IN', whether you are in pursuit of your academic performance, your work, your business or even your relationship. You can't even waiver by a fraction of 1%.

The FIX so that we get 'LOCKED IN' ?  It's no less than a 5-letter word, F-O-C-U-S.  It is something non-negotiable, no quarters given, it's either you take it or not, it's either you are IN or OUT.  Waiver and you're gone.  Wither and you'll be out in the cold.  Weaken and it could be GAME OVER for you.  Now, how to be 'LOCKED IN' by being FOCUS?  You got to put your heart, mind and soul into it.

Now for a 'LOCKED IN' - 101, I grabbed this poster because these four [4] squares say it all [and I guess I don't need to make a sales pitch, right ?  Just look at the other side of things and start being IFFFFY.  IF you DON'T fix short-term issues, how can you have that FOCUS ?  IF you DON'T sort out the IMPORTANT versus the URGENT ones, how can you not get mixed up and eventually lose FOCUS?  IF you are unable to avoid distractions and those interruptions in life, how can you gain momentum?  And IF you DON'T limit yourself for the non-urgent ones, do you think you can be 'LOCKED IN'❓❓❓

When The Window Is Closing....

When The Window Is Closing....

Windows have always been tagged to opportunities such that as long as the window is open, we were always assured that those opportunities remain to be up for grabs.  But what happens when those windows are closing?  Do we wait by the wayside for it to close?  Or do we go against the force that is closing that window of opportunity?  Good question.

Truth of the matter, as long as those windows are wide open, it leads us all to an bright and optimistic outlook of things ahead of us.  Even the blue skies have become synonymous to the opportunities we always cherish.  But then, nothing is really cast in stone.  Even the bright and sunny days can, all so suddenly, turn into dark gloomy skies where we all know what will follow, that is, those heavy downpours.

Oh yes, for optimist, even a window that is gradually closing is still an "open-nish" window for him, something that should NOT raise his worry or apprehension.  But for the guarded ones, those are tell-tale signs that opportunities are slowly slipping away from us.  So, what do we do when the window is closing?

To the realist, a closing window tends to portend imminent things that may not augur well to him. And he starts to run a MIND-MAPPING.  Like a blurred view out in the window implies that his hopes out there are getting blurry too?  That those probabilities that were originally on target are slowly slipping away?  That was once attainable may NOT be achievable now? 

Whereas, when you just landed a job, when you just got a laptop, when you just got married, when you just have moved in to your new home, when you just started school or when you just started off your first foray into business, all these materialized after you saw this via your windows of opportunity.  But what if that window of opportunity was closing?  Pronto, find a lever to countenance and stop that gradual closing because you need to BUY TIME till you hit pay dirt.  Just DON'T let that window close yet❗❗❗

Talking About 'PAY'

Talking About 'PAY'

This could be interesting talking stuff, once we start Talking About 'PAY'.  To set things straight, we won't be talking about PAY GRADES as that is way beyond our purview.  Instead, let's dissect when we hear from some quarters that they are working more than what the PAY they are getting.  How often we hear these rumblings on the ground, that he/she is NOT getting a fair share of things because things DON'T seem equitable enough because his train engine seems to CHUG-CHUG-CHUG way beyond and above his/her PAY.  Can we pause for awhile and really validate if this noise makes sense.   Really ?

Whereas, there is small plurality who can't believe it that he/she is getting PAID way more than he expects.  This is no figment of our imagination.  We should have witnessed some of those whom we know quite well enough are part of a rare group who feels they seem to be paid more than the the work they put in.  So, what sets them apart from the majority.  Well, there is a huge disconnect, as wide as the Red Sea where the disparity in mindsets and motivation are just too huge, too mind-boggling for us to explain.  Suffice it to say that these two groups are really poles apart.

What becomes inevitable is the obvious apples-to-apples comparison between these two disparate groups.  And for the seemingly deprived and short-changed group, it's just damn tough for them to accept that for the same volume and kind of work, a small plurality is receiving 20% to 100% more than he/she is getting.  But that's where COMPETITIVE EDGE arises.

It's true, most of us work to live, rather than live to work but hey, how can we overcome that huge disparity between the seeming short changed ones versus the seeming high flyers in the work place.  But rather than dissect others, let's dissect ourself.  Are we too QUANTITATIVE? Is OUT-of-SCOPE our favorite retort?  Are we just too ensconced in our silo such that collaboration and team plays are foreign to us?  Are we just too exacting such that we want to avoid being short-changed because we won't even consider to compromise at work?

At the end of the day, our stakeholders may NOT be favoring any particular one but in a workplace, it is inevitable that we all get compared on apples-to-apples basis.  And when you are 'penny conscious' and just too quantitative, think about it as eventually, the decision-makers will have to separate the men from the boys❗❗❗

How Often Are You Late

How Often Are You Late

Apologies if I'd seem confrontational with this frank query:  How Often Are You Late?  And how aware are we with regard the consequences of LOST TIME?  Are we to quantify the ACTUAL LOST TIME? WHAT IF you LOST TIME because you missed the project submission deadline?  WHAT IF you ended coming late to your final job interview?  WHAT IF you arrived late in your agreed appointment with the girl you're wooing?  WHAT IF you arrived late for a bidding?

Our bigger problem though is NOT recognizing the LOST TIME we incur and sometimes when we do recognize it, we never get to recognize the concrete ramifications into our lives.  And should we agree that every LOST TIME can't be bought with $$$$ at all? So, how can we recoup those unquantifiable LOS TIME? Of course, you could retort that there's a TOMORROW anyway so you can recoup that LOST TIME.  But hey, the time you will tap for tomorrow is not the LOST TIME of yesterday.  Time that is lost is time that went down the drain, period.

Last month, we had a scheduling issue since we had a confirmed holiday that was a hundred miles from home.  To accentuate things, we got to attend an engagement which was a good hundred miles from our holiday location.  And the catch is, I've never been there to that engagement site before [so we I had to cling on WAZE].  Lo and behold, we arrived at that location for the very first time a good fifteen minutes ahead of schedule.

But hey, why can't we learn our lessons enough?  I have an answer though.  We are just damn stubborn, so that explains why we never learn our lessons NOT UNTIL we got hit badly and we realized that we were able to claw back and recover because by that time, all the cards were stacked against.  So?  Would you now agree that being LATE IS UNACCEPTABLE❓❓❓

When Things Are In a 'HOLDING PATTERN'

When Things Are In a 'HOLDING PATTERN'

How often have you been in a situation when and where you felt READY and all FIRED UP for something but things were just NOT progressing at all, not even an inch?  Hmmm that doesn't happen often but it does a few times in our life when you end up so befuddled because you seem to be in a state of stupor simply because Things Are In a 'HOLDING PATTERN'.

Remember al these from your past.  You had by then graduated from university and ready to TAKE THE PLUNGE in the job market but one job option after another just fell through.  OR you were ready to TAKE THE PLUNGE by getting married but your fiance/fiancee just seemed to be 'UNREADY' yet? OR you were all ready to launch your business but 'show stoppers' kept popping up over and over again.

Indeed, getting caught in the quagmire of a 'HOLDING PATTERN' is tough to say the least, and there's just no way to overstate that. When this dilemma creeps in, a hell lot of negativities will start to creep in.  Frustration. Exasperation. Disappointment.  Bitterness.  And sometimes, even anger creeps in.  But hey, when that 'HOLDING PATTERN', here's what we should handle it when they universe tells you: ' Hey, you think you're ready but you're NOT, actually'

Let's have an analogy when an arriving flight is caught up in a 'HOLDING PATTERN'.  What happens down below, at the airport, is nothing less than CHAOS and PANDEMONIUM all rolled into one.  Why?  Because people end up so helpless.  They would feel like being in the darkest room ever, clueless of anything to clear things up.

How to handle being in 'HOLDING PATTERN'?  Rather than trying to make it happen, we need to recognize that sometimes we are in that 'HOLDING PATTERN', where we are asked to wait until it's time.  That waiting may feel like fatigue. We got to accept that our physical body just can't move as fast as our minds or as light.  We've got  gather more than enough PATIENCE as our body calibrates to the frequency of the new things we desire.  When you reach that point of realization, you'll be back to your 'cruising altitude' in life❗❗❗

Why Things Get Worse Before It Gets Better

Why Things Get Worse Before It Gets Better

Yes indeed, this is one of the perplexing things in life.  While we all wish, dream and pray that things will go from good to better to best, in most cases, it doesn't happen that way.  Be it during your school days, at your workplace, in your family and domestic life and even over to your entrepreneurships.  Indeed, Why is it that things need to go worse before it gets better [if at all]?  Indeed, that's one of the mysteries in life that remains unsolved till even as we speak now.

Indeed, there is one principle in our life that is very essential to recognize early on because no one is immune from this syndrome.  Otherwise, not understanding and accepting this harsh reality in life has the potential to forestall things, when and if it gets misinterpreted.  And truth of the matter is: Things USUALLY get worse before it can even get better.

Whenever you set an intention and actively sork towards a goal, there tends to be a general worsening of the situation at the onset.  This can come in the form of an inner resistance or reaction, but surprisingly even in the form of external events.  You set off to a new endeavor and ironically stuff starts breaking, hiccups happen, money is lost, accidents get in the way.  

But this gets even more obvious when you set an internal goal, maybe you work to get a calmer mind and it gets even more agitated, or you take a course to improve your life and get only more frustration out of it.  That explains Why Things Get Worse Before It Gets Better.  And this is akin to medicines.  Occasionally, medicine may worsen the symptoms at the initial stage before the disease is eventually cured.  It's like bringing all the symptoms to the surface, allowing their full manifestation before they plateau and finally leave the body.

This principle is particularly obvious with inner work and any form of shadow work.  Whatever is supposed to leave your mind and body, first needs to fully come to the surface of consciousness.  This explains why healing past traumas can be so painful.  Because the trauma needs to be fully relived and reinterpreted consciously while the natural tendency of the mind is to push it down to the subconscious layers where it can cause less hurt.  This same phenomenon is observable in any area of personal growth where you keep trying to build self-confidence.  This explains as to Why Things Get Worse Before It Gets Better✅✅✅

Why Wait for the 'LAST STRAW'?

Why Wait for the 'LAST STRAW'?

Care for the  'LAST STRAW'?  Oh, you won't believe it, many of us are partial and comfortable in stretching and stretching things, so patient and persevering and worst, [wrongly] thinking that eventually he'll be fine, that things will turn out favorable, that the turn of events will eventually end based on his sheer optimism.  That probably explains why we tend to have misplaced optimisms such that we keep waiting for the 'LAST STRAW' but it's too bad, only a minority of us all assess the risks and probabilities in a level-headed manner.  Very few in fact amongst us give an impartial and balanced revalidation and reassessment of the debacle they are currently confronting.

One could be in a very trying relationship that has seen more DOWNs than UPs through the years.   And yet, surprisingly, there are folks with misplaced optimism as they remain nursing for hopes that eventually, the other protagonist [and that could be his/her partner/spouse] will eventually welcome him/her back in open arms despite and inspite of all the wrong things he's been guilty of.  In short, they keep waiting for the 'LAST STRAW'.

In life, when you start things out, you could find yourself so secure with a robust-looking rope but what we tend to overlook is that even the sturdiest rope will experience its natural 'WEAR and TEAR' till the last strands of its fiber becomes the the 'LAST STRAW' that will eventually snap off.  Sounds familiar?  Yesirrrrrs we have seen that scenario day-in day-out in our life.

Hey, let me confront you.  Do you really want to turn a blind eye in the face of all the risks you're facing?  And hoping against hope that you will never end up to that very 'LAST STRAW' that will hit the camel's back?  Good grief.  That probably explains why many of us in a debacle end up badly beaten black and blue, no thanks to being stubborn and just blink to the harsh realities we are facing.  And when your partner unceremoniously walks out from your domicile, many of us get floored, sometimes fatally.

Don't look far.  Instead, relook at our relationships now with our partner/spouse and re-examine things proactively.  Doesn't it make sense that we do a REALITY CHECK in case we will end up wit the LAST STRAW that will BREAK THE CAMEL's BACK?  C'mon, it's never late to do a reset❗❗❗

All GAS and No BRAKES

All GAS and No BRAKES

No sirrrrrs, today's piece is not related to the current oil price conundrum which, as of yesterday, the price per barrel was just a shade below $100.  But instead, what I want to pitch today is all about pressing all GAS and NOT to pull on the BRAKES

Instead, this is all about egging us all that in life, when we set our goals and go for it, let us frame our mindsets to go ALL GAS and NO BRAKES.  So, what does going ALL GAS mean?  Simple.  It means being focused, being ALL-OUT, firing all cylinders at its full throttle.  You might challenge me as you might think this is a no-brainer.  But here's the fact.  At the very least, 50% of us all don't really give it all when we are on something.  We exert efforts just right, just enough.  Likely you heard relationships when a partner is not ALL GAS

So, why is it sometimes our bosses at work or our partner/spouse will express concern that you DON'T have that ALL GAS mindset?  Well, where there is smoke, there is fire and when one gets HALF-HEARTED, what else do you expect? Do you expect the healthiest relationship if all you gave are token efforts and no more than lip service.

Oh, this is my poster for the day.  GIVE UP, GIVE IN or GIVE IT ALL YOU'VE GOT.  Regardless of your endeavor, and be it at the workplace, in your relationship or even in your business, the drivers of either your SUCCESS or FAILURE can be dissected back as to whether you have decided to either GIVE UP, GIVE IN or GIVE IT ALL YOU'VE GOT.  Your fate in life will be shaped as to whether you will opt in for the first option or the last option.  Let's go ALL GAS and NO BRAKES, dude✅✅✅

Never Miss Out the BACK-BURNERS

Never Miss Out the BACK-BURNERS

Yes, that is true, We are all biased and partial to those that are at the forefront, at the main burners.  Problem is, the bulk of things going on are in the BACK-BURNERS.  And that is our problem.  The frontage always gets the attention but what gets missed out are the BACK-BURNERS.  To ensure we are all aligned, let us do a sampling of typical goings-on in our lives which are often left in the BACK-BURNERS.  If you're in school, the minor elective subjects seem to be left in the BACK-BURNERS.  In your relationships, the gross disservice is when your partner/spouse seemingly gets stuck in the BACK-BURNERS, huhuhu.

Isn't that a 'RECURRING REPEAT' [pardon for the intentional redundancy] but here's the thing.  How often we heard that the spouse/partner gets overlooked, gets relegated alongside the backdrops until the relationship hits its rough patches and its foundation starts to weaken until it crumbles down to the ground.  All because the partner has been pushed to the BACK-BURNER.  Before you know it, the flicker and the luster of the once super sweet relationship has dissipated in thin air.

Let's now swing over to the workplace.  At the start when a 'prized catch' gets onboarded, his value to the organization seems to be at an all-time high [and that always happens in the 'honeymoon period' anyway].  Then when that 'honeymoon period' is over, that 'prized catch' has lost his luster and he ends up in the BACK-BURNER.  What happens next?  As he gets less and lesser attention, he starts to look out in the job market again.  Poor dude.

Truth of the matter. It is human nature to end up in a vacuum-like situation when after all the frenzied attention that did abound, when that dreaded eerie silence creeps in, one realizes that probably, he's now part of the BACK-BURNER, NOT deserving of the premium presence, NOT worth the attention of the stakeholders.

But hey, let us NOT 'over-analyze' and 'over think' unless you are able to validate that your best days in your school, in your organization, in your relationship or even in your business, that those BEST DAYS are behind you because there is nothing left of you except your shadows as a BACK-BURNER.  But hey, ask me:  can you get a 'second wind', a 'second life', a 'second change' around?  Sure you can but you got to DIG DEEP into your bag of tricks ❗❗❗

Make It Stick, Dude

Make It Stick, Dude

Oh, let me caution you.  Today's piece should not be one boring one.  Although STICKS seem that boring.  But would you agree that Sticks do Stick?  Whereas there are many more complex and convoluted things in life.  But the challenge we have in our hands is that more often, we are not given a second chance to redo things all over again.  Obviously, we are all confident that if we doing things take a second time around, we could do things much better, with more finesse, with more aplomb and most importantly, with an impactful aftermath.  However, the catch here is that things could have been impacted either way around.

How about clowns?  Why are they so impactful?  Why do they grab the headlines for extended periods of time, with their stories told and retold across?  What sets clowns apart from us?  Simple.  They are the best exemplifications of making things stick.  Throw clowns in any country, in any culture, in any event.  When the curtains fall, they would have likely left their mark deeply across their audience.  Hey, what makes clown impactful?  They are the top proponents of making things stick.  While they perform based on $$$, that's a non-issue.

BTW, to make things impactful, you DON'T have to be so convoluted and complex.  In fact, to quote Bill Clinton, "KEEP IT SIMPLE, shit". And by keeping things that way, you can leave your own imprint.  If you're a student in school, your submitted academic projects should be spotless and spot on.  If you're in the workplace, you must leave your own imprint such that you will be known for it.  Be it quality-focused, SLA-centric, customer-driven or even innovation-driven.  In a relationship, your partner/spouse must know from head to foot your personal imprint as a partner/spouse.

If you're an artist, leave your personal imprint and if you, your artwork will likely stand out and your audience will realize your work attributes in terms of perfectionism, creativity and an artist driven with meaning in his artworks.

You may NOT be an entrepreneur but think about your own BRANDING.  Obviously, this is easier said than done but think about it, if you get to be touted based on your best attributes in your endeavor, people will all swarm towards you, not because of you yourself but it's because of your BRANDING, how you have etched a name in your endeavor.  And if it's about relationships, if your partner/spouse 'adores' you heads over heels, imagine if you end up with more 'secret admirers' [not because of an ill intent]✅✅✅