Take What's Given

Take What's Given

There's one too many prevailing  thoughts telling us that nothing is free in life.  And technically, that is a correct statement but in real life, there's a bounty of OPPORTUNITIES that knock on our doors for our own taking but the problem lies with us.  It takes us donkey years to think and rethink zillion times whether to grab such.  But hey, as they say, Take What's Given.

What's needed from us is to grab such OPPORTUNITIES, with no time wasted.  Try thinking a zillion times before you decide to take it or not, there are no guarantees that that opportunity will wait there for your picking.  We miss our OPPORTUNITIES of love, career, happiness and success because we refuse to learn the lessons that come our way.  When a new opportunity comes, we would rather stay safe instead of taking a risk.  We have been told to FEAR THE FUTURE and to believe in the past.

All pain and suffering is us an emotional sign to change our current circumstances.  When you don't change, more pain and suffering will come your way.  FEAR dominates us and keeps us from having the life we could have.  We just live in a state of REGRET and SORROW.  Why is it many of us refuse to learn the lessons of those OPPORTUNITIES missed out ?  When in fact, when an opportunity comes our way, it forces us to CHANGE.  Why ?  It's because LIFE is CHANGE.  People who who DO NOT change are left behind.  And I can attest I've known quite a number who refused change,  And that doesn't surprise me for what they are right now.

I met someone, asking me how to discern which direction to take for OPPORTUNITIES. I curtly told him, he can take whichever way he prefers and there will be OPPORTUNITIES therein.  What do we need then ?  MORE COURAGE.  It takes courage to live a happy life.  Connect with your INSTINCTS and disconnect with your mind.  Remember, the real objective of your mind is TO MAKE SURE YOU FAIL.  Your instincts are trying to get you a better life.

What's the ICING on the CAKE ?  It is believing in yourself. What you believe is what will show up in your life.  If and when you really don't believe in yourself, TRUST ME, nothing will work out.  Lastly. STOP BLAMING anyone and TAKE ACTIONS.  If you would like to know why you are not so happy or successful, face the mirror and you will know the person stopping you.  What's the hardest lesson we have been missing to learn many times in our lives ?  It is our innate refusal to Take What's Given, [wrongly] thinking that time is on your side when in truth and in fact, you're running against time, dude✅✅✅

Are You Swimming 'UPSTREAM'

Are You Swimming 'UPSTREAM'

How is it in your life now ?  ARE YOU SWIMMING 'UPSTREAM' ?  Are things like more often you are moving and running UPSTREAM, UPHILL ?  As opposed to moving and running on a levelled road ?  But for today, we'd like to discuss a bit how to handle things when, at some points in our lives, we tend to be SWIMMING UPSTREAM or moving UPHILL.  Why is this a talking point ?  It's because there are more failures, more fallouts happening when we tend to swim UPSTREAM or move UPHILL.  And this is what we need to really dissect because these are inevitable situations we just need to handle our way.

In life, we encounter problems as we breathe.  But it doesn't get to us until we feel a major impact, and that's when it becomes a source of concern, hurt or worse, sorrow.  Life problems, depending on the magnitude, can be clogs in our life's 'wheel of progress' and we may not be able to attain our full potential if we don't learn to place our problems in the proper perspectives.  The worst thing, though, is when we tackle our problems, it will be like SWIMMING UPSTREAM.

But before we just end up talking generalities, it will help to list down the 'weakest links', the areas where we are most vulnerable:  FINANCIAL CRISIS.  HEALTH CRISIS.  FAMILY.  RELATIONSHIP.  MARRIAGE.  WORKPLACE.  CAREER PRESSURE.  UNFAIR TREATMENT.  EMPTINESS. BOREDOM.  CONFUSION. FRIENDSHIP PROBLEMS.  HAUNTING PAST.  SAFETY.  FAILURE.  GRIEF.  

So, how can we change courses if things are going UPSTREAM or UPHILL ?  First, go back to REALITY.  Some of us tend to get 'lost' because we tend to be detached from REALITY. Second, EMBRACE YOUR LIFE as it is, instead of AS YOU WISH IT TO BE.  Third, bide your time.  DON'T PANIC.  Fourth, practice gratitude, it pays.  Fourth, STAY CLOSE to your feelings, even the painful ones.  Fifth, accept SUCCESS and FAILURES as part of life's journey.  And lastly but most importantly, tend to your relationships.

At the end of the day, LIFE's a JOURNEY.  ENJOY THE RIDE.  Be POSITIVE and SELF CONFIDENT.  If negativity creeps in, that's akin to Cancer @Stage 1.  Then, BE READY TO HELP OTHERS.  The dividends you will reap with your helping hand will surprise you.  Then CONTINUE TO IMPROVE and renew yourself.  Then 'WALK THE TALK'.  Live what you preach, especially if you are a leader in school, at the workplace or at your business.  Then, NEVER STOP TO LEARN, apply and share your knowledge.  In due time, you will be riding the waters DOWNSTREAM instead of UPSTREAM❗❗❗

Dodge a Bullet Only If You Have To

Dodge a Bullet Only If You Have To

Oh, bullets are either one of two ways, namely: it could either be an OPPORTUNITY or a THREAT.  But this is not the appropriate forum to discuss bullets as threats so we'll focus on bullets that come as OPPORTUNITIES.  And this is what we'll focus on, that is, how to ensure we don't dodge a bullet only if you have to at all because those are LOST OPPORTUNITIES.  And when we lose such opportunities, the value we end up for a single LOST OPPORTUNITY is more than just its face value itself.

Once we miss an OPPORTUNITY, what happens next?  REGRET creeps in, right ?  But do we know that REGRET is a negative emotion ?  This negative emotion emerges from an undesirable process of a certain decision [and that includes an INDECISION that caused an OPPORTUNITY to be missed.  One reason REGRET is so important for individual decision-making is because people take the possible impact of REGRET into account when making a decision [or an indecision].

In a meta analysis of 11 research studies about REGRET concluded that REGRET causes the strongest feelings and impact in those decisions [or INDECISIONS] related to education, career, romance, parenting, one self and leisure.  And the study shows that that FEELING of REGRET will remain as long as the opportunities for change remain open.  In situations where there are few opportunities for change remain open, that reduces the intensity level of regret.

So, here we are, raising this awareness that we may dodge a bullet only if we have to.  Otherwise, we got to challenge ourselves when INDECISION impacts our thought process but rather than raise our hands and give up on INDECISION, we need to figure out how can we, if at all, mitigate those moments of INDECISION.  

Thing is, indecision becomes a bad thing when it lasts too long.  How long is long ?  That depends on the circumstances.  Will you miss an important opportunity if you wait ?  Will you lose something that you really want ? In sum, if ever you will dodge a bullet, it is NOT an OPPORTUNITY that will lead to you regretting.  So what's the bottomline.  Think of all the POSSIBILITIES, POSSIBILITIES and POSSIBILITIES so you don't end up with a LOST OPPORTUNITY❗❗❗

Water CAN'T Rise Higher Than it's Source

Water CAN'T Rise Higher Than it's Source

Water CAN'T Rise Higher Than it's Source.  Oh, is this a boring piece for today ?  I don't think so because we can drill down on this topic quite lengthily as this has been part of the equations we're all facing during this long-drawn pandemic.  A lot of our needs in life now do hinge on the efforts we pour in to address a need, to fix a problem, to focus on an improvement.

But to piggy-back on this one-liner, that is, Water CAN'T Rise Higher Than it's Source, this picture speaks volumes.  And when we do a mapping of this picture into our lives, let's revisit the challenges we faced in life.  If you're a student, you have your own set of challenges.  If you're a working professional, you're in for a ride as well. If you're into a relationship, your relationship with your spouse/partner and immediate family should have those needs for mending along the way.  If you're running your business, surely at various points in time, you had to fix your relationship either with your business partners, suppliers or even clients.  But the biggest question looming behind us is how long does it take us to fix our challenges?

Oh my apologies, I won''t buy on what this poster says because to me, WHAT YOU SEE is WHAT YOU GET.  The fact that you have a problem at hand behooves you to fix it no less.  Face your problems and fix it.  Remember that Water CAN'T Rise Higher Than it's Source so as to how swift and how effective are you in fixing a problem will heavily hinge on the tons of effort you put.

The TRUTH and the FACT is that at the end of the day, what matters most is RESULTS, period. And the RESULTS are correlational to the efforts we put on, the efforts we invest to fix an issue.  Studies have supported results which confirm that 99% of the RESULTS depend on EFFORTS.  Shave off from your efforts, expect less solid results.  if at all, you might end up with a palliative, a 'band aid' solution no less.

The thing is, problems deserve the amount of TIME+EFFORT we can commit to fix it.  Oh my attention got caught by this simple poster because its message is short and sharp:  PONDER OVER YOUR PROBLEM. AVOIDING a problem ?  RUNNING AWAY from a problem ?  IGNORING a problem ?  These are the most common pitfalls why problems persist.  Lest we forget, Water CAN'T Rise Higher Than it's Source❗❗❗
 

What Gets MEASURED Gets IMPROVED

What Gets MEASURED Gets IMPROVED

Taking a leaf from no less than Quality Guru Peter Drucker:  What Gets MEASURED Gets IMPROVED.  But you might wonder why this topic deserves some time to be discussed right now ?  Hmmm, it's because many of us [and that includes me in the past] would [stubbornly] believe that if things ain't broke, why fix it ?  Oh, it sounds rationale but only from the surface.

And this brings us to circle back to the very basic argument as to why should we measure things, if at all ?  The old school of thought made us believe that as long as the gravy train is not stalled, then the journey goes on and all we need to do is stretch our patience till we reach our destination.  But for us who have been in the trenches, it's just not enough unless we are fully aligned that everything that's going-on are all efficient, optimal and fully fine-tuned.

So, everything really boils down to dollars and cents.  Are we operating efficiently ?  Are our operations cost-effective ?  Are we utilizing time to the hilt in the most efficient way ?  At the end of the day, are our operations churning out more profits for the interest of the stakeholders? if you were a student, are you managing your time vis-a-vis your academic chores optimally ?  If so, maybe you believe that What Gets MEASURED Gets IMPROVED.  

In our personal lives, we hate when our parents or elders or even partner/spouse want us MEASURED because we easily fall prey to tag them as CONTROL FREAKS.  But these days when we are fully wired in a digital environment, What Gets MEASURED Gets IMPROVED and that mantra is a given, take it or leave it.

But until you get into your realization, then this becomes a hard sell.  if you're a student, measure how efficient is your time management.  With your partner/spouse, measure the 'downtimes' of your relationships and assess the impact of those 'downtimes'.  If you're running a business, you don't need a sales pitch, right ?  C'mon dude.  What Gets MEASURED Gets IMPROVED, period❗❗❗

Face Your Problems. DON'T Facebook It

Face Your Problems.  DON'T Facebook It.

Welcoming NOVEMBER and this is exciting because the December holidays are not far down the road.  Meanwhile, life is life.  Blessings come.  Curses do happen. And if there is a constant in our lives it is those problems.  We never run out of it, regardless of social strata.  But that's fine because such is life. And supposedly, life becomes boring then. Not really though the way some of us handle our problems.  As this new cliche goes, Face Your Problems.  DON'T Facebook It.  So, is social media a BOON or a BANE ?

So, the NOT so debatable issue is whether social media has become a BOON or BANE? For me though, leveraging technologies for us to have all these social media is indeed a BOON.  So, when does it become a BANE ?  Hmmm, as long as you DON'T FACEBOOK your problems but instead FACE YOUR PROBLEMS.

What's happening sometimes is that if and when we tend to 'wash the linens' in public or in social media jargon, when you  FACEBOOK YOUR PROBLEMS instead of FACING YOUR PROBLEMS.  Too bad, I can attest on a personal basis how I was made aware of this faux pas more as a first person account.  And I always believed that the problems of two sane people or families are best sorted out privately and NOT via socmed.

Let's face it.  By nature, humans are that opinionated.  If you seek their opinion [or worse. even if you DON'T seek their opinion], each person is that opinionated.  Studies show that only 1-2% would admit as not having any opinion on a matter they are aware of.  So, if 98% are that opinionated, what to expect but a rowdy and cacophonous crowd out there, whew.

Problem is, in today's social media, it seems so effortless for one to transmit or share something and if he intends to reach out to a wider audience, the efforts entailed to reach out to a single recipient versus a huge platoon [or even battalion or regiment] is about the same because all it takes is to post and share it in socmed and that's it, voila !  What is lost, however, is that THE END DOES NOT JUSTIFY THE MEANS.  So, please seriously give a thought, Face Your Problems.  DON'T Facebook It [Ooops, DON'T META IT] ❗❗❗

This is NOT a Halloween Scare !!!

 This is NOT a Halloween Scare !!!

Happy Halloween 🎃🎃🎃but hey, please DON'T get me wrong with this banner screenshot.  I'm not implying that my bank balance is down to 0.00 😀 but instead, I'd want to share an advisory from one of my most trusted bankers, that's BDO.  Oooops, this is not a commercial pitch but please take it for what it is.

But hey, old school scams are now part of the distant pass.  In our highly wired digital place, ONE-STEP SCAMS are gone ! Instead, we got MULTI-STEP SCAMS all over the place. To be honest, today's fraudsters are at least a step ahead of all the gurus and SMEs developing patches and fixes to pre-empt fraud.  NO WAY Jose, let's do admit that fraudsters are always a step ahead.  That explains why our anti-virus updates are happening not just once a day anymore, whew.

And BTW, these fraudsters RIDE WITH THE TIMES.  If TikTok is today's craze, buckle down your seatbelts because the fraudsters have another repertoire of tricks up in their sleeves, very much attuned to TikTok.  For our kids so crazy with TikTok, caution them

So, what exactly is a MULTI-STEP SCAM ? Firstly, it will hit and ride on your FEARS.  How ?  By raising FEARS that your account was indeed breached [or about to happen anytime soon].  And to be fair, we can't blame ourselves when FEAR takes over us because that's human nature.  What makes this MULTI-STEP SCAM seemingly easy and effortless is the way these fraudsters are so detailed and almost 'picture perfect' to mimic and simulate your legitimate banker.  See this sample, it looks 100% legitimate & valid.

YES, as you start to bite the bait, that brings you closer and closer to finally 'GIVING UP' your  bank account to the fraudster.  How ?  At that point when FEAR has overtaken your own self, think of being HYPNOTIZED and all you're left with is to literally follow each NEXT INSTRUCTION.  BTW, to be clear on this, you can remain aware and guarded but that doesn't guarantee that you are immune from all these fraudsters.  I myself, despite all my guarded awareness and extreme caution with all these frauds, 

Last month, in real-time mode, I received an alert from my banker that I just completed a US$ 130 transaction traced all the way back to Walmart's Arkansas Headquarters.  But I had the least of worries because my banker immediately blocked my card and invalidated that transaction.  Preventive measures?  DON'T access public wifi.  DON'T connect to a secured WiFi unless you are assured you're secure.  DON'T click any link unless you have called your bank about it.  DON'T entrust your credit card for swiping unless you can see them swiping.  DON'T panic when you receive alerts. DON'T trust any electronic message or text message unless you have validated it. Instead, validate that alert. Thank you, Citi.  So, let's all be forewarned.  Happy Halloween 🎃🎃🎃

Perception Plays, Perception Matters

Perception Plays, Perception Matters

Across our lives, things happen for a reason and the results will lead to consequences and ramifications.  But this is not all about CAUSE and EFFECT.  Beyond it, Perception Plays, Perception Matters.  You could have outputted 9 but your boss takes it as 6.  And that half-truth may not be true at all but who cares, because when Perception Plays, Perception Matters.

Hey, you could see that glass as half-full but your customer tells you that it is half-empty.  And when there is a gap, a disconnect between two parties, only God knows what happens next.  So, where's the beef ?  You, we gotta ensure that perception is always aligned to the 'TRUE FACT'.  Anything that is a half-truth means it's NOT TRUE.  You could be a student in school, a worker in office, a business partner or a lifetime partner to your spouse.  The common denominator is for us to ensure that PERCEPTION = FACT.

BTW, you might wonder, where is PERCEPTION ARCHIVED ? Oh, perception is archived across any of our senses.  And when that perception is stored, erasing or correcting that perception will take at least twice the effort had we decided to endeavoring that that wrong perception should not happen in the first place.  As the old cliche goes, PREVENTION IS BETTER THAN CURING.  If we were students, I'll take an earnest effort that I be perceived by my professor as a serious student.  If I were a worker, I want that I am perceived by my boss that I am a focused worker with a sense of accountability.  If I have a business, I want to be perceived as customer-centric no less.

Who does not want to be perceived either as a conscientious student, a faithful spouse, a responsible worker or a customer-centric businessman ?  So, I hope we're all on the same page with regard perception but ooops that's only half of the story.  The other half of the story means we need to stand out for what we want to be perceived.  We need to walk the talk no less.

Bottom-line is this equation:  PERCEPTION = REALITY and no less than that.  While we keep preaching that we need to take efforts so that the perception about us remains good and positive enough, it takes 'TWO to TANGO'.  PERCEPTION will come into play if it is aligned with REALITY.  We can't allow gaps or disconnects please✅✅✅

Any Meat Left on the Bone ?

 Any Meat Left on the Bone ?

Oh yes, have we noticed sometimes with bones scattered all over the place ?  But the nagging question I always asked myself is why sometimes, I do see MEAT LEFT ON THE BONE.  And this happens very much in our real lives as well.  The biggest chunk of our strengths are deeply embedded within our bones, so let's ask if ANY MEAT is LEFT ON THE BONE yet.

BTW, all our resources in life are finite.  Even that water dripping from the faucet will eventually dry up.  What's regrettable, though, is that there are points in our life when we feel there is no MEAT LEFT on the BONE.  How many challenges did we face in our lifetime and how often did we ever give up too soon ?  Indeed that's regrettable because more often we were unable to ascertain that there was meat, scanty it may be, left on the bone because we could have gone farther.

One particular resource we often feel we've gone kaput is TIME. Often, we thought we ran out of time, thinking that the next thing we needed to do was to give up on what we were embarking, abandoning something which we started or just shunning off from the priorities we earlier set forth.  And indeed it is a HUGE WASTE if we [wrongly] thought that it's GAME OVER simply because you [wrongly] thought you RAN OUT of TIME.  But let's relook back if indeed we made the pinpoint assessment that we judiciously utilized every tick of the clock, with ZERO WASTAGE, if at all ?

Not to sugar-coat, all along, the meat I've been referring to are the tons of time we did not utilize optimally or worst, those fractions of time we have utterly wasted.  If we can go by the playbook in the basic management of time, there is a high likelihood that we will not end up with MEAT LEFT ON THE BONE scenarios.  This poster says it all:  WASTED TIME IS WORSE THAN WASTED MONEY.

At the end of the day, life is all balancing act.  No one size fits all.  You yourself will need to figure out how to optimally utilize your resources [and most especially TIME] so that you won't be questioned for throwing bones with meat therein.  The worst thing in life we would want to hear from you is that "I DON'T HAVE TIME" because that's the worst lame excuse we deserve to give❗❗❗

That Habit of Landing 'ON YOUR FEET'

That Habit of Landing 'ON YOUR FEET'

This is a given.  Not all the time are we expected to be just walking on the ground as in life, from time to time, we have to take risks.  On the other hand, we can't blame many of us who remain steadfast in refusing to take risks simply because they are not sure if once they jump to aim for that goal, will they be LANDING ON THEIR FEET back on the ground.  It's like a damn if you, damn if you don't.

Indeed, it is scary and quite intimidating if we paint scenarios that once we fail after taking a risk, we will FALL FLAT or worse, end up badly bruised, at least mentally and psychologically, if not mentally.  But as there are always no guarantees that you won't fall flat once you fail, it makes sense to be guided how can we take risks.

Not to sound killjoy, it pays we GATHER COURAGE when take the LEAPS of FAITH.    #1 DON'T UNDERESTIMATE YOURSELF.            #2 CAREFULLY ASSESS THE RISKS v BENEFITS #3 DECIDE BY YOURSELF TO TAKE RISKS       #4 BE REALISTIC, WHAT CAN WRONG AT ALL #5 LET GO OF WHAT OTHERS THINK, THAT'S IT #6 BE REALISTICALLY POSITIVE, NO MORE THAN what is realistic and feasible because you need to be honest and fair to yourself.

What else do we need ?  It is that BALANCING ACT, weighing the Pros and Cons, comparing the possible benefits [if you achieve it] versus the extent of risks you need to take.  You may want to bag a lucrative job earning $$$ but what are your chances ?  What happens if you fail? Ensure that when you fall back on the ground, you still LAND ON YOUR FEET.
 

Lest be optimistically misplaced, it pays that you always readied yourself with either a parachute or a life-saver when things end up in our failure.  Regardless, it pays that we develop that habit of always LANDING ON OUR FEET those times when we slip, when we fail❗❗❗