A FINISHER Matters More Than A STARTER

YES, it's confession time.  In the past, I used to have a 'STARTING PROBLEM'.  During those times, I was tempted to start things sometimes off the cuff.  At times, all I needed was a catalyst that will trigger me to initiate something [regardless if that initiative will take a few minutes OR even donkey years to accomplish].  I have to admit that WHEN something excites me, it's like nothing can stop me from starting off something new.  And during those years, I thought I was good at it.  BUT A FINISHER Matters More Than A STARTER📗📙📘

Oh Oh, I DON'T want to go back to those years WHEN I was 'trigger happy' to start off practically anything OR everything that seems to excite me.  Those years, I can start so many things that in the end I'll even loose track of them.  I can get so excited about the ideas behind things that I want to just jump in and start.  And I did!!!

I can think of a handful of small projects that I've decided to start, often they are things that I'm making OR building.  I would go to the store and get supplies.  It's all so much fun UNTIL I get back and then realize HOW much work is ahead and HOW it may be really really hard work.  And if I was NOT careful then, I can end up doing so many things and NOT finishing them.  Now WHO says that STARTING things is unlimited?  NO sirrrrrrs.  STARTING has its LIMITS.  We can only have so many balls in the air at one time❎❎❎

And the downside of being good at taking initiatives is that you will [LIKELY] end up find yourself spread thinly across.  The thing is, the more you have going on, the less effective and invested you can be in any of those forays you get involved with.  SO HOW?  First off, we got to learn how to SAY NO [even to our own self].  And that is the hardest one for many of us.  That thril of starting can be fueled by endless possibilities that could come about💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  Let's go back to our drawing board and revisit how many ongoing initiatives you have at hand [as we speak now].  NEXT STEP?  Let those projects end.  And that is hard because surely you'd love that idea enough to start it.  And it's hard to see something that we care about [and die OR fail].  And it's equally hard because it forces us to confront our own LIMITS and instead admit that we are unable to do it all at once.  Instead, it forces us to see that starting things all the time is NOT sustainable OR effective.  YES dude, A FINISHER MATTERS MORE THAN A STARTER😃😃😃

Let's Start With Mini-mini Whiny Tiny Habits

 

We all heard about that 'BIG BANG' Theory of this universe and NOT surprisingly, a plurality of us do subscribe to that.  WHICH is NOT wrong BTW BUT for me, that reflects our human nature to go for something BIG, something MAJOR.  And IF and WHEN we need to change and improve our habits, much as we are aware of our frailties and 'chinks in our armor', we would at times aim for those 'BIG TIME' change of habits BUT WHAT's the risk for that approach?  It is that higher rate of probability that we will fail in those attempts WHEN the goal is quite lofty and sometimes aggressive💥💥💥

And ever since we all got hit with that dreadful Covid-19 Pandemic, from my viewfinder, I did witness that a good number of our population have hardly reached that 'full recovery' state in their daily lives.  I can feel exhaustion, NOT physically BUT mentally. A fatigue that NO amount of sleep can fix.  And I [wrongly] thought that all it takes is MORE sleep, LESS screen time and maybe meditation.  BUT at the end, I realized that those required MORE time, MORE willpower and many times, we need MORE of both💚💛💜

I realized one thing though and that is, making huge changes all at once would be daunting to most of us, if NOT to all [and I can attest that I've seen that NOT only to people close enough to me BUT even to my own self] WHEN we attempted one too many changes all in one fell swoop.  At that point of my realizations, I also realized that I was kind of clutching on straws so I went back to the drawing board and did my own list of changes I'd like to see coming to fruition in my life [and NOT just in my dreams akin to that figment of my endless imaginations!!!

WHAT was an eye-opener to me during those times WHEN I was kind of clutching on straws was that spiel from psychologists WHO claim that fear only motivates us for the short time and if it happens that one of the changes we want to make in our life is based on fear, we need to reposition it in a way such that it will lead us to think about the positive outcome instead of avoiding that dreaded negative outcome😡😡😡

Our takeaway:  Let us figure out the TINY HABITS WHICH we can adopt and move towards the bigger changes we do envision along the way.  And YES, make those TINY HABITS doable enough, and it has to be HABITS we can truly stick with, LIKE waking up every 5am to give us enough time to prepare for our daily routines, LIKE that 20-minute daily exercise as a bare minimum.  Bottomline here is that we are NOT in a competition BUT we need to retrain our brain and consistently change our HABITS for a week, for a month, for every month thereafter, building our own confidence and reinforcing and sustaining those short gains.  So, LET'S START WITH MINI-MINI WHINY TINY HABITS, dude???

When Mind, Body And Spirit Are Aligned?

 

This morning, a question was posed in Quora.com:  HOW FAR CAN WE GO?  Ane Christensen shared his/her insights.  He/she turned 80 this January 2025 and still works as a production designer. [DON'T GET HER WRONG.  SHE'S NOT WORKING FOR THE SAKE OF $$$$$$ BUT SIMPLY TO BE BUSY AND GET GOING].  To quote him/her further:  THERE'S REALLY NO SET AGE WHEN ONE CAN STOP WORKING AS LONG AS THE MIND, BODY AND SPIRIT ARE UP TO IT  AND ACTUALLY, WORK AND SOCIAL INTERACTION KEEPS US YOUNG, seriously.  I just CAN'T agree more on this WHEN MIND, BODY AND SPIRIT ARE ALIGNED💚💛💜

Years back, I had the rare opportunity to be invited by noted Life Coach Samira Gupta and I remember her differentiating and at the same time reinforcing the need for our MIND, BODY and SPIRIT to be aligned, as follows:

• Our MIND represents our intentions and thoughts which shapes our communications and decision-making

• Our BODY is the vessel that carries out these intentions, reflecting our inner state through gestures, posture and even facial expressions.
• Our SOUL encompasses the very essence of WHO we are guiding our actions and reinforcing our core values

BUT before we end up  " SILO'ing' " our MIND, BODY and SPIRIT, let us NOT miss out the undeniable fact that we are one whole human being BUT on the condition that they are all in alignment although if someone WHO lives and breathes more via his intellect, such alignment may appear to be ambivalent OR ambitious in scope💥💥💥

The main message that keeps resonating across the landscapes is for us to shift our old paradigms and consider to start thinking anew to incorporate other methods of explanation that may enlighten ourselves at most.  One of the most popular best practices is getting into meditation because that helps to become the platform that will lead us to that certain 'elevation'.  Unfortunately, yoga was wrongly tagged by some quarters as another sect, another faith BUT it's NOT.  Instead, it reinforces the very foundations that will help us to shape as the human being we ought to be.  Look NO farther than those nightmarish experiences of American military personnel WHO just came back from deployments either in the vastness of Afghanistan OR Iraq😡😡😡

A sordid YET unbelievable first-hand narrative I heard is with regard an American WHO just came back from Afghanistan.  Since returning back to his family, his MIND, BODY and SPIRIT DIDN'T seem aligned at all.  He initially manifested behaviors that were either too irrational if NOT alarming until one day, he killed his whole family before killing himself for reasons only he himself would have brought to his grave.  Although this tragedy is an outlier of an American story, it has been happening [albeit with nary any publicity].  IF ONLY we can ensure our MIND, BODY and SPIRIT are always aligned😌😌😌

Passkeys Versus Passwords

 

NO sirrrrrs, for our thread today, we DON'T intend to host a 101 course for PASSKEYs vs PASSWORDs because I am NOT a security SME.  BUT I thought I could dip my hands into the cookie jar if only to raise a bit of awareness with regard the huge vulnerability of protecting our digital accounts via PASSWORDs.  I'm NOT claiming that I am NOT using PASSWORDs because till today, I do BUT WHAT I can share is that I am migrating, albeit on a piecemeal basis, my security protection from PASSWORDs to PASSKEYs.  We DON'T need to look farther than this table which plots the realistic turnaround time our passwords [based on character length] can be breached by hackers📗📙📘

Having given that context, I admit I am actively espousing our blogsite readers to please very SERIOUSLY consider leveraging on PASSKEYs in lieu of PASSWORDs.  Months back, I was a victim of my bank account's hacking BUT thanks to my pushy escalations reaching my bank's CEO, the bank reimbursed all my lost monies then.  BUT that does NOT shield me from future digital breaches❌❌❌

There are tons and tons of very compelling narratives proving that PASSKEYs are the runaway option in lieu of PASSWORDs but for simplicity, I pasted this simple table if only to increase our layman's awareness, hoping you can take concrete steps to veer away from PASSWORDs and move into PASSKEYs!!!

Besides that very troublesome and cumbersome way where we save/log our passwords [even in our smart phones, UNTIL one day, knock on wood, we even end up losing that smart phone, whew], the harsh reality here is that with the speed of technology, these hackers never sleep and they are very much 'in step' with technology, WHICH explains WHY tons and tons of PASSWORDs are getting hacked.  Just yesterday, my blogsite was inaccessible because Google proactively shielded it from an unwanted attack bu hackers trying to pry into my account.  Good grief they failed there, so my site is back😌😌😌

Our takeaway:  NOT to scare you out of your doors, please seriously consider all the UPSIDEs the PASSKEY offers and all the DOWNSIDEs these old school PASSWORDs have led us into these digital traps as I am encouraging that we be more preemptive and proactive before you end up as the next hacking victim, God forbid.  Unfortunately, these hackers never sleep.  YES please, consider PASSKEYs over PASSWORDs💥💥💥

Rigidity Could Cut Like Glass

 

WHO wants an easy life?  Me, moi, yom ich!!!!!!!!!!!!!  WHO DOESN'T want an easy life?  BUT frankly, an EASY LIFE is NOT and should NOT be WHAT we should be hoping for.  Because if ever one day we end up in an EASY LIFE, I can attest that anything that comes EASY can go and dissipate in thin air as EASY as it came about.  Look no farther than revisiting those LOTTO winners WHO bagged the jackpot prize worth hundreds of million $$$$$.  How's their net worth today? YES, RIGIDITY COULD CUT LIKE GLASS!!!

Building a 'right-sized' life, a purposeful life, requires facing [I call it EMBRACING] and doing hard things in life.  Living aligned to our values and top priorities in every season involves doing hard things.  Being someone WHO would tend to question anything that surfaces beyond rationale and reason and stubbornly carving out a path that feels joyful and sustainable😌😌😌

Unless we want to spend life in hiding OR in the most remote caves in Pakistan's Baluchistan mountains, mired in fear OR simply numbed out, we need to learn to show up unafraid and move forward even in discomfort and practice doing things that feel hard.  We could be just about to leave the portals of our school OR about to plunge into the workforce OR about to start our own family OR simply heading into an empty nest, putting life back together after a loss OR pain OR even in the thickness of a messy midlife.  WHATEVER age and stage in life we are now in, we are encouraged to really NEVER give up BUT instead keep up with that sustained momentum despite the setbacks we face along the way because that is as important as remembering to breathe.  It's as basic as that💥💥💥

YES YES yowww, real life is messy [BUT beautiful enough].  I used to think that IF I could build a life slow enough, simple enough, that I could live in a bubble and avoid pain, misery, frustration and all those seemingly unbearable miseries.  BUT WHAT's reality anyways?  Life is NOT a predictable romantic comedy.  And very rarely does life end with a neat, orderly bow.  YES, it's messy, complex, and sometimes raw and challenging💨💨💨

Our takeaway:  Many years back, I challenged myself with this subtle threat, that is, if we're going to show up fully to our imperfect and beautiful lives [with joy and purpose at that], we will need to do those damn hard things in life.  Living awake and on purpose means embracing the dark and the light.  Owning that life DOESN'T have to be perfect OR easy to be beautiful.  And giving ourselves permission to rest and taste pleasure and choosing to do hard things, allow me to share these tenets:

• LIFE IS NEVER EASY - No one assured us that life is easy
• TAKE THAT SMALL STEP - DON'T dream of quantum leap
• YOU HAVE ENOUGH - Never tell yourself that you're raw

Dude, RIGIDITY COULD CUT LIKE GLASS!!!

Turning Around A Bad Day

 

Having a BAD DAY?  No big deal.  That's no breaking news.  Everyone gets hit with a BAD DAY from time to time.  Even in those days WHEN you thought the stars seem to be aligning in your favor, NOT until you hit a snag once you reach your workplace, and before you know it, one snag led to another until, fast forward, you find yourself squeezed between a hard rock and an immovable object.  SO HOW?  Do you just accept things as they are?  If you're contemplating to just say that you are fated that way for that day, then you're making a huge miss because that's the time for you to grab the bull by it's horns and NOT let that BAD DAY run its way from bad to worse till you are totally obliterated that day📗📙📘

Let's face it.  Life can be full of frustrations, an argument with your partner/spouse OR work colleague, a missed train, a fouled-up schedule because of a terrible traffic gridlock, OR even a casual spilled coffee that can make you wish you could crawl back into bed.  HOW can we change our mood WHEN we've started our day off on the wrong foot?  And HOW do we stop our annoyances from dragging ourselves down and even killing our expected productivity for that day💦💦💦

Allow me to share the '3M APPROACH' crafted by noted psychologist Dr. Susan Albers wherein she espoused that '3M APPROACH' which stands for being MINDFUL of feelings, MOVING and doing a MINDSET makeover.  True, WHEN we're in the midst of a bad day, it can be hard to stop and reflect on our feelings.  True, sometimes a bad day is just a bad day BUT a lot of times, there may be a deeper cause behind one's emotional response WHEN things go wrong💧💧💧

A common practical advice we always heard is that 'knowing' and even 'naming' the feelings we're going through is incredibly helpful and soothing.  And once we have identified our feelings, this next step is WHAT I've done always in the past.  I would write it down in my personal journal.  OR alternatively I'll talk it out with a trusted friend.  It might NOT seem like much BUT bottling up one's feelings will only make things 'bubble' up later.  And in order to shake off a BAD DAY, the best sage advice we would often receive is to 'GET UP AND MOVE'.  Getting active, WHICH we know is sometimes easier said than done, we might feel so overwhelmed by our emotions that we DON'T want to move at all.  BUT if we move our body, our mind will follow💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  In many of our BAD DAYS, feelings will often be part of the equation BUT we CAN'T let them consume us either.  During those BAD DAYS, distractions can even end up as a blessing.  Watching a favorite movie, or picking up the top Netflix movie on that day, OR simply diving into your favorite hobby.  Movement is also a natural way to boost our mood.  So, if our passion involves physical activities like hiking OR running, it's all the better.  Oh YES, there's a trap here.  Let us avoid judging our own selves OR even imposing rigid standards. And if we CAN'T completely set the anger OR depression aside, let us not worry much.  TURNING AROUND A BAD DAY is akin to the fact that SWALLOWS HARDLY MAKE A SPRING😌😌😌

Do You Have The Chops For The RAT RACE?

 

DO YOU HAVE THE CHOPS FOR THE RAT RACE? As most of our battles in life takes place on those battlefields within our minds, our life has become akin to schools and universities, a life filled with many countless and endless lessons to be learned at every stage and phase of our journey.  And those of us that learn lessons should be fortunate enough to move onto the next stage WHILE others ar left to repeat that same class in school, whew📗📙📘

Question is, can we withstand that rigorous curriculum of life WHILE striving towards your goals?  YES IF YOU HAVE THE CHOPS FOR THE RAT RACE!  As they say, true champions stare adversity in the face and rise above their circumstances.  So, is it difficult?  YES BUT we need to understand all challenges are character-building moments that increase our mental endurance and prepare us for life's next lesson.  If ever you do have the CHOPS, be relentless💚💛💜

IF we look around the most common success stories, nothing jumps out of the window in terms of magnitude BUT one commonality they all share, they relentlessly keep on hurdling all the roadblocks along their path.  YES, successful people refuse to quit because life dealt them a few lemons.  YES, they do take those lemons, squeeze them into a glass of water, add sugar and drink up.  YES, you just CAN'T quit because life gets too difficult.  YES, life gets hard and harder for everyone at some point and that cycle keeps going📌📌📌

Question:  Can we escape from the vicious cycles of that RAT RACE?  Unfortunately you and me CAN'T escape from it.  So HOW's the cycle like?  LIVE.  MAKE MISTAKES.  LEARN.  GROW.  I'm sure you and me and everyone else have probably [and very likely in fact] made quite a number of mistakes in our lifetime.  Admittedly, my share of imperfections and mistakes is quite a list, ouch BUT I take solace from the universal truth that many people WHO are deemed as successful , failed multiple times before they became a success story in their own right.  BUT the sad part is that there is a plurality of us WHO are only witnesses to the glory without knowing the extent of every failure a person has gone through in his life journey😡😡😡

Our takeaway:  Successful people know pretty well that there is NO embarassment in failures at all.  If we live long enough, you'll make a mistake [OR maybe a string of mistakes] that may lead to a temporary debacle.  SO HOW?  let us leverage on those temporary debacles as an opportunity to learn and begin again.  WHAT should be our mindset?  Let us work like we're second best so that as we climb the steep slopes of the mountains, our heels will be itching to keep moving.  So, DO YOU HAVE THE CHOPS FOR THE RAT RACE, dude???

That TESTAMENTARY INTENT In Gift-giving

 

YES YES YES yow, it's Christmas Season, the season of gift-giving.  True, this annual holiday shopping scramble hits us all in various ways, forms and shapes.  And WHAT happens next?  Some of us dread shopping for large families WHILE some are looking for honest reviews before swooping for gifts WHILE a small plurality may want to skip conventional consumerism entirely.  And between you and me, WHETHER you are overwhelmed OR excited to start, can we pause and ponder to harp on one thing.  And NOT to be a meddler dousing cold water this Christmas Season, a small-small reminder to us all.  We all have the freedom to choose the gifts we want to give and regardless its worth and value, we are gently reminded that it's the TESTAMENTARY INTENT that matters most, that genuine intent from within💚💛💜

Others call it habit OR simply out of character BUT the fact is, gift-giving can be an art, that art of thoughtful gifting.  And this boils down to the fact that, after all is said, done and given, INTENT MATTERS.  Ironically, these days WHERE convenience often trumps consideration, the very essence of GIFTING has gradually become 'transactional'.  Frankly, gift-giving is NOT even about the opulence OR extravagance of a gift, definitely those price tags should NOT be a factor at all.  Instead, it is that act of giving something with deep consideration for the recipient's feelings💦💦💦

Someone may play devil's advocate and blurt out:  WHY DOES INTENT MATTER in gifting?  Much as some of us may NOT be consciously aware of, WHEN we inject our thoughts in gift-giving, we are unconsciously building OR even strengthening connections with our gift recipient.  WHETHER it's our parent, spouse/partner, friend OR a colleague, intentional gifting creates that emotional resonance and shows that we truly value that person.  And that is WHERE the TESTAMENTARY INTENT comes into play, into the equation.  True, a well-chosen gift speaks volumes as it can convey love, gratitude, encouragement, celebration, comfort OR a combination of any of these💥💥💥

In today's world we live in WHERE the frenetic pace never seems to slacken off, that simple effort of gift-giving will be rare and precious enough.  That effort exerted to take time to think, select and even personalize a gift will obviously demonstrate our presence and involvement and even in the most subtle way, it can send across the message to the gift recipient that they are worth your time and energy.  BTW, experts advise that to practice that art of gift-giving will need us to understand the occasion and emotion.  As every occasion carries a unique emotional weight, taking pains to understand the sentiment allows us to align our gift with the recipient's emotional needs [OR at least the emotional state]😡😡😡

Our takeaway:  BEFORE we get overwhelmed with all the festiveness of this Christmas Season, consider pulling the brakes and take stock of things and even with our TESTAMENTARY INTENT in gift-giving, let us NOT miss out to align our gift-giving to the recipient's current state because like it OR not, even gift-giving permeates our human emotions.  At the end of the day, we want your gift-giving to be your TESTAMENTARY INTENT😀😀😀

Banners Hang Forever!

 

YES YES yowwww, BANNERS HANG FOREVER!  In the simplest words, NOTHING SUCCEEDS LIKE SUCCESS.  We must note, however, that we are often times blinded by our own egos from seeing the full possibilities of life.  And WHEN we discipline ourselves to adopt periodically, we can perceptively drink in the full meaning of a situation without imposing ourselves upon it.  Developing the ability to compete is one of the tenets towards the SUCCESS whose definition we all agree on.  This rests on our ability to organize ourselves in such a way as to generate opportunity and results, rather than those impasses, stagnations and unproductive arguments and, frankly, those wasteful frictions.  In the simplest words, we must know HOW to tap and leverage on our energies📘📙📗

To quote this hard-hitting philosophical statement, MAN IS LIMITED NOT SO MUCH BY HIS TOOLS AS BY HIS VISION.  And I CAN'T agree less with this because to be a visionary, all that someone has to do is BUT open our own eyes.  WHERE there is a lack of vision, anytime we can go off-track.  In that SEVEN HABITS training hosted by Stephen Covey, his messaging was curt and sharp, that is, NO ONE CAN PERSUADE ANYONE TO CHANGE [as each of us does guard that 'gate of change'  and that can only be opened right from the INSIDE no less❗❗❗

One realization I have had the past years is that NO WAY can we open the gates of another person.  I did witness a very driven parent motivating his child to aim for this OR that.  I did see bosses motivating their team members no end.  Watching NBA games, I did see how coaches really push their players to the limits NOT just during those competitive games BUT even in those drills and training they go through way beyond the lens of the pyring media.  All approaches to appeal and motivate for CHANGE can only go so far💥💥💥

Let's accept this.  Some of us do resist CHANGE [even if that means that that CHANGE can pave the road towards one's SUCCESS].  I remember this old Arabian proverb:  THE CARAVAN IS MOVING AND THE DOG IS STILL BARKING.  In the layman's words [and from the ordeals I went through], nobody and nobody likes to be told that they must CHANGE.  NOT even the favorite son of doting parents.  NOT even the loyal mentee of a persevering mentor💜💛💚

Our takeaway:  I can attest that a positive CHANGE yields substantial dividends, one of WHICH is SUCCESS and without any doubt, NOTHING SUCCEEDS LIKE SUCCESS.  And failure is NOT even an option.  I remember that Star Wars movie where Yoda said:  DO OR DO NOT.  THERE IS NO TRY.  In my own terms to myself, BANNERS HANG FOREVER and nothing can be better than that😁😁😁

When You're Stuck Between A Rock & A Hard Place

 

A lot of WHAT IFs in life BUT how about this.  WHAT IF we crash-landed between a huge rock and a hard place.  Sounds like an Armaggedon scenario BUT no sirrrrrs, many of us would, at some points in our life, would have reached the Rubicon and the question you asked yourself was HOW to cross the Rubicon if you were CAUGHT BETWEEN A ROCK AND A HARD PLACE📘📙📗

In life, WHEN we're at a point WHEREIN we look at our situation and see a huge mess, it's best to distance yourself from it and instead, rework things, restart OR even reboot if need be.  WHY will rebooting OR resetting be helpful?  In the NBA, WHEN a ballclub is hugging the cellar, it looks way ahead by anticipating the next year's DRAFT season WHERE they'll look for rough gems💙💛💚

In short, at that point, those desperate NBA ballclubs will start 'tanking' so that they will end up up higher in the totem pole, so that their next DRAFT PICKS will be as higher ranked as possible.  So, WHEN they decide on 'tanking', that ballclub is focused on no less than a REBUILD, a REVAMP, a top-to-bottom overhaul of the team roster💥💥💥

Oh oh YESSSSS, if things are in a total mess, that total cost of REBUILD will be enormous BUT in life, that's the mindset for a ONE TIME-BIG TIME thing WHERE you brace yourself to be absorbing 'sunk costs' that could probably include all your investments in TIME, $$$$$ & especially efforts.  True, it's a heavy headache you've got to endure wading through that situation WHERE you crash-landed between that ROCK and a HARD PLACE❌❌❌

Our takeaway:  Word of caution.  Crash-landing between a ROCK and a HARD PLACE does NOT happen OFTEN.  If at all, it may hit you once OR twice in life [unless you're living a roller-coaster kind of life?].  BTW, it's NEVER fun being in that dilemma but the best mindset is to dictate upon us THAT there is a tomorrow, THAT there will be streaks of sunshine soon [if NOT tomorrow] and THAT you are in a situation WHERE you're down to playing your remaining marbles because there's really NOTHING TO LOSE unless you opt for that self-defeating stance of giving up and raising the white flag, then you LOSE BY DEFAULT, the worst way to lose your fight dude😃😃😃