Humans Are 'SELECTIVE'

Humans Are 'SELECTIVE'

Nawh sirrrrrs, today's piece is NOT about these babies.  They are just so 'picture perfect' they're worth sharing.  Anathema to us [as compared to babies], we humans are 'SELECTIVE'.  I can rattle off adjectives choosy, fussy, picky, discriminatory, I'll ran out of adjectives.  But the truth is, we humans are just 'SELECTIVE' enough once any of our senses 'go to work'📗📕📘

Allow me to share this Quora post by Gaia L.  An elderly couple was vacationing in the West.  Sam always wanted a pair of cowboy boots and seeing it on sale, buys it, wears them home, walks proud enough into their room and tells wifey:  Notice anything different sweetie?'  And she says, 'Nope' then Sam says excitedly 'Come on sweetie, take a good look.  Notice something different?'  She blurts out 'Nope'💎💎💎

Frustrated, Sam storms back to the bathroom, undresses and walks back into the room completely naked except for the boots and frustratingly, he blurts again, 'Notice anything different?'  Then sweetie finally says it all: 'Sam, what's different?  It was hanging down yesterday, it is [STILL] hanging down today and it will be hanging down tomorrow!'.  Furious, Sam yells, 'And do you know why it's hanging down, sweetie?  It's hanging down because it's looking at my new boots'.  Sweetie replies, 'Should [yah] bought a hat, Sam'💊💊💊

Truth is, we can have ALL [as in ALL] the fruit varieties right staring our face but the likelihood is, we humans will look for something else NOT laid out before our eyes.  That vacationing couple story may be fiction but essentially, it seems non-fiction because it can't be farther from the TRUTH anyway.  So what's our lesson here?  DON'T assume people see what they must see.  DON'T assume they will hear what they should hear.  You got it all wrong there⏳⏳⏳

You can be out there in the job market, so confident your solid work credentials puts one foot of yours inside already.  OR your CV/Resume just seems so top heavy, only 'divine intervention' will prevent that from happening.  But no sirrrrs, lest you forget, the recruiter/hiring manager is a human, so give him that elbow room to be that 'SELECTIVE'📌📌📌

Bang For The Buck

Bang For The Buck

Yesirrrrrs, from time to time, we do receive INVITES for a free lunch.  You'll get it from accounts and sales folks who are akin to predators lurking out there for opportunities.  But do we know that there is NO such thing as free lunches but instead it's always Bang For The Buck and that's non-negotiable.  The Latin expression says it all:  QUID PRO QUO.  Something has to be taken, something has to be given.  There really is NO bonafide free lunches except when we talk about TREAT or TRICK📗📘📙

Even when we go to the supermarket, it's all VALUE for MONEY.  We really DON'T splurge because it all boils down to figuring things out to eke out a Bang For The Buck.  If you're out in the job market, you've got to convince the recruiters and employers that you undoubtedly offer Bang For The Buck and where there is a perceived potential shortfall, things can't be a GO📌📌📌

In fact, to earn those bucks, you got to do what it takes to 'MAGNETIZE' those bucks over to your end.  In relationships, it can't be that far.  You just DON'T get the 'sweet nod' of the girl your wooing, NOT until she's fully convinced that you got the Bang For The Buck.  If you're an entrepreneur, it becomes equally challenging.  You just CAN'T sweet-talk potential clients.  You got to 'MAGNETIZE' and pull them over to your end⏳⏳⏳

Even with social engineering much embedded in our daily life now, your Bang For The Buck should not hinge on you, on us leveraging on social media.  At the end of the day, those behind social media are humans like us.  Who doesn't want to hear and see the potential intrinsic value in exchange for something that will be given in return💎💎💎

BTW, before we get too euphoric, likening ourselves to be atop that flying aircraft, let us take a serious PULSE CHECK then those results should be inputs to our REALITY CHECK as we closely reassess ourselves, sizing up the odds in and against our favor.  Let us NOT be too cocky, too confident thinking that we DON'T need to lift our finger enough to get what we want.  We got to grind and grind, dude💹💹💹

No Moral Victories In Defeat

No Moral Victories In Defeat

Sometimes [and sometimes it comes in streaks], DEFEAT would hit us in our life [and that's fine as it is part and parcel of life].  What is NOT fine is we end up [habitually] claiming Moral Victories In Defeat because in essence, there is No Moral Victories In Defeat.  A 'L' [Loss] is NOT a 'W' [Win] because you got to eke a WIN to claim that victory.  But sometimes, we tend to flip things💎💎💎

Problem is, when we end up getting hit with a streak of defeats a.k.a. failures, we shrug it off like 'OH THAT'S A ONE-OFF' until that one-off does NOT end up as such when defeat a.k.a. failure keeps recurring.  And instead of ending up to motivate us further, we would take it as a moral victory [even in failure].  No sirrrrs, a failure is a failure, period.  DON'T even window-dress it because that ends up like a square peg you're pushing in a round hole.  

In sports, an often used phrase is 'THERE ARE NO MORAL VICTORIES' and that phrase is extolled by coaches, fans and players alike whenever their team loses a contest.  It places primacy on the score as the only outcome worthy of acknowledgment.   If at all, we need to challenge ourselves and pursue three things as we move forward.  Firstly, let us NOT 'sacrifice the future on the altar today'.  Secondly, let us love our future self as much or more than we do to our current self.  And lastly, let us recognize the genuine miracle it was that they were present in this moment [despite our day to day grind] and never forget this and understand your responsibility.  There are just NO excuses to put in hard work💊💊💊

Bottom line is, to quote American General Colin Powell. 'THERE ARE NO SECRETS TO SUCCESS.  IT IS THE RESULT OF PREPARATION, HARD WORK AND LEARNING FROM FAILURE'.  Hearsay CEO Clara Shih says it further, 'TO WIN, YOU HAVE TO SWIM UPSTREAM EARLY ON - AND THAT REQUIRES HARD WORK and LONG HOURS.  THERE ARE NO SHORTCUTS'.  Indeed, all these quotable quotes are 'content heavy'📌📌📌

Yes, defeats and failures are part of the harsh realities in life but no can argue that indeed 'HARD WORK PAYS OFF'.  You can have nothing now.  You are probably scrambling to go straight to the faucet during meal times because you got NO meals on the table.  But that's NEVER the 'end of the world'.  As much as several doors of opportunities may have shut down on you, look around because one or two windows [of opportunities] will open up for you.  There are just NO MORAL VICTORIES IN DEFEAT❗❗❗

When NOT To Make Decisions

When NOT To Make Decisions

Ooooops, I might get bashed if I now lobby when NOT to make decisions because all along, we have advocated that we should act fast based on swift decisions but now, do I seem to take back my words?  No sirrrrrs, our resoluteness to reach swift decisions remains atop the totem pole BUT hey, those were NEVER unconditional words because such statements remain ifffffy.

Topping the list of NO-NOs for you to make your decisions is when you're either emotional or worst, angry.  Note that being emotional could mean being ecstatic and euphoric.  But either way, such emotions are extremely powerful and it can skew our thinking in such a way that end up saying or doing things we would NOT normally do.  And that goes along with rewarding a person after an outstanding performance.  Who knows that was a 'flash in the pan'❓❓❓

At the workplace, you could get exhausted towards the end of day.  And hey, fatigue can result in making decisions that may feel right at that moment of exhaustion but may NOT feel so good once the fatigue has lifted.  So when you are feeling burned out, be cautious and careful regarding making decisions you choose to make and that gets complicated if you're anxious because anxiety can be brutal in the sense that it can take your mind captive and overwhelm your judgment💊💊💊

Such anxiety can be so distressing that people will make any decision just to end it.  However good it may feel at that moment, such decisions are often regretted later on when the anxiety simmers down.  So, better take caution when making decisions while battling a bout of anxiety.  Sometimes, the aftermath of a 'grave loss' deep within you can reshape our normal thought process.

Now let's swing to those moments when we seem to be in 'CLOUD 9'.  As nothing feels more energizing than a great success, those are the moments when all that is needed to get our nod is a slight nudge.  When we're euphoric enough, we become vulnerable to end up with ill-advised decisions.  Never forget WHEN NOT TO MAKE DECISIONS💹💹💹

Have We Forgotten To Be "CHILDREN"?

Have We Forgotten To Be "CHILDREN"?

Have We Forgotten To Be "CHILDREN"? A silly question?  Not so fast.  Instead, why DON'T we pause for awhile and think nothing but all the manifestation of children in their daily life.  APPRECIATIVE.  GRATEFUL.  POSITIVE.  SIMPLE.  And most of the time, 'LIVING IN THE MOMENT'.  Whereas, let's swing to our adulthood.  How often are we APPRECIATIVE, GRATEFUL, POSITIVE and SIMPLE [in expectations that DON'T require the moon and the stars

Post-it-Notes all over?  No problem.  BRING IT ON and I won't let you down.  Swinging to our adulthood, there we go, name it, we have it.  SENSITIVE.  COMBATIVE.  LESS FORGIVING.  And where do all those lead us to?  That's when we are pushed in the abyss, into that dark corner, having very few options to wiggle in the elbow room.  And in the end, we seem to stand on shaky grounds atop the incognito sinkhole💎💎💎

It's true we all have our lives to live, priorities to focus on but if there's one area we adults have significantly regressed is that of being PLAYFUL.  All along, we stereotyped being PLAYFUL just to children.  It's like it's a no man's land.  But let's think about it.  If we could reclaim back at least 30% of our PLAYFULNESS as children, would we be LESS stressed and LESS vulnerable like children    

Heard of PRIDE across children?  Nada.  Nitchs.  Rien.  It just doesn't ring a bell.  Children can mingle across the open field and instantly, you would see them playfully enjoying the company of another kid he/she came across that very moment in the wide open field.  Whereas what happened to us adults.  We develop our own turf.  We put up those imaginary fences to separate us from anyone we feel doesn't deserve to interact with us.  And before we know it, we're ensconced up there in the ivory tower, shielded from anyone we DON'T want.

When was the last time we were grinning from ear to ear?  Probably when we did hit the Lotto jackpot.  OR when we landed our first job.  OR when we had our first brand new car.  OR when we got promoted.  OR when we flew out of the country for the very first time.  So, WHY DON'T we reclaim back the glorious days the children have enjoyed day-in day-out❓❓❓

How Far Should You Stretch PATIENCE

How Far Should You Stretch PATIENCE

How Far Should You Stretch PATIENCE?  But before we get bogged down with that serious discourse, let's align with Oxford's definition of PATIENCE as that 'capacity to accept or tolerate either delay, trouble or suffering without getting angry or upset'.  So, indeed, intolerance and impatience does afflict our lives.  Why are we so impatient❓❓❓

I'm no linguist but besides 'DANKE' in German, there is this wonderful word  to describe children who can't sit still and the word is 'ZAPPELPHILIPP'.  That story of Fidgety Philip tells about the tale of a boy who simply can't sit still.  Rocking his chair at the dinner table, he falls backwards, dragging the tablecloth and everything on it.

On the other hand, this 'picture perfect' shot of a doting father patiently teaching his daughter the basics of biking says it all.  So while IMPATIENCE is NOT always helpful especially when it is aggressive or probably causing fear or worse, stress, it can be dangerous.  A concrete example is driving with that aggressive impatience, tailgating and worst, hooting a cautious driver.  When such a manic driver ever overtakes me when my family and myself are in the family car, that would be the closest shave I will endeavor my family not to agonize with💠💠💠

On the other hand, the challenging question I had to pause before responding to, was: 'IS PATIENCE A VIRTUE'?  I'll leave it for my readership to reserve their own answer.  But what kind of troubles me is if we seem to have lost sight of the value of PATIENCE because countless studies have shown that PATIENCE enables people to accomplish things otherwise not possible.  In some of my past 'darker moments', I avoided dwelling on questions like 'WHY ME?' because that could be a pathway to negative feelings of self-pity📌📌📌

At the end of the day, let's have this analogy with the multi-fibered rope.  No matter how sturdy it is, one day it will get snapped.  And that's exactly the threshold we'll encourage you to think about.  Be PATIENT but not when that breaches the threshold when things will boomerang back to you.  Stretch your PATIENCE only when it is fair, rational and reasonable.  Beyond that, cut the crap✅✅✅

Stepping Out Of Your Bubble?

Stepping Out Of Your Bubble?

Yes we all have our own bubbles in our life.  And it's the best place to be.  That's where you can be in your most unguarded moments.  That's where you feel assured that nothing would go wrong in life.  That's when your self-confidence and self-motivation is beyond doubt at its peak.  But here's the catch though.  Sooner or later, we got to be stepping out of our BUBBLE and many times in fact, it won't be our choice at all💊💊💊

Just as our bath tub is, we can't remain enjoying the warmth of the water.  Either the water has to be drained or we might have simply overstayed there.  So, when do we think we would be stepping out of our BUBBLE?  The ability to take risks by stepping out of our BUBBLE is the primary way by which we grow.  But the harsh truth is that more often, we're afraid to take that first step.  But the real truth that seems to be in oblivion is that our very own BUBBLE is NOT really that comforting enough to be tagged as our COMFORT ZONE💹💹💹

So how can we step out of our BUBBLE a.k.a. COMFORT ZONE?  Topping all things, we need to be aware as to what's in there outside our BUBBLE.  Not being aware of what's in store outside will not entice us to step out.  Equally important, be aware of what you need to overcome.  Whether it's the fear of interacting face-to-face or talking before a crowd, figure it out.

Now, tjos becomes trickier and easier said than done.  Endeavor to get COMFORTABLE with DISCOMFORT.  It could be as simple as talking to someone.  But if you hang-on a bit more, you would realize that the DISCOMFORT you had seems to be gradually waning, albeit gradually💎💎💎

Now, taking the next step is crucial.  So do take BABY STEPS [and NOT that 'quantum leap'].  DON'T try to jump out of your BUBBLE as likely you will get overwhelmed and what happens next, you will jump right back in.  Now when trying to 'wiggle out' of a discomfort, be honest enough AT LEAST TO YOURSELF.  DON'T condone things wherein you'll alibi is "I JUST DON'T HAVE TIME [right now]".  Unless you gather your inner resolve to step out of your BUBBLE, that may NEVER happen, maybe NOT even in your lifetime.  My God, that's very pitiful dude❗❗❗

Slopes Can Be VERY Slippery

Slopes Can Be VERY Slippery

Not to dampen the spirit and adrenalin of the mountaineers and outdoor lovers but Slopes Can Be VERY Slippery.  But similar to coins, there are two sides to it.  One side tells us with a loud NO that that is NOTHING to be scared of because it WON'T lead you to something tragic and dreadful.  That is true in most cases but only for your first 'slip up'💊💊💊

And this is our most common fault which seems to have turned from 'one offs' to chronic ones.  After a first 'slip up', we would simply dust things off and proceed with the same undertaking.  So, where's our miss there?  We overlooked the need to pause and take a quick 'post mortem' as to why and what caused that 'slip up'

But the "devil's advocate" in us eventually turns cynical and would question that need for a 'post mortem' as it seems to be a WASTE of TIME ?!@# from their perspective.  If we're looking to a tandem trekking up that same 'slippery slope' and both did 'slip up' and the other one pauses for a moment 💹💹💹

Swinging back to our lives, sometimes we tend to be so 'cocky' and argue further that a recent 'slip up' was just that, a 'slip up'.  "NO WORRIES" has become a popular rejoinder in fact.  But much as people are NOT worrisome, truth of the matter, many of us who end up in a 'tragic fall' or ar least a 'near tragic' one is because we belittle the little things and little setbacks that hit us, when in fact, each minor setback pushes us closer an inch closer and closer to the brink of the ultimate failure which even sometimes end fatally

We've heard sort of 'miracle' stories of people who were suffering various illnesses but surprisingly have rebounded and they DON'T seem to intend to die in the next coming years [YET].  We've heard of divorcees who didn't know how to pick up the pieces all over again but lo and behold, they are now enjoying life when they were given a new lease of life.  So, please be wary when you're in a downward slope❗❗❗

Tell-Tale Signs of Red Flags in Life

Tell-Tale Signs of Red Flags in Life

Should we be searching the grounds and highways for our [potential] RED FLAGS in life?  Absolutely.  Be on the lookout for Tell-Tale Signs of RED FLAGS in Life.  You DON'T want to buckle up and go for a long haul drive only to get your car stalled in the middle of nowhere⏳⏳⏳

Relationships?  Even the strongest and tightly bonded ones sometimes weaken and just end up crumbling down like cookies.  WHY?  It's because there were Tell-Tale Signs of RED FLAGS in Life yet we sometimes [or maybe, many times] simply ignore it, kinda shrugging off our shoulders.  When two parties in a relationship seem to gradually drift apart although one of them is reaching out, guess WHO'S THE CULPRIT💊💊💊

On the other hand, those tell-tale signs of problems down the road manifest right in our behavior and actions.  Easily giving up.  Quitting as swift as when lightning strikes.  Taking a "U-TURN" in decisions or directions with very limited, if at all, thorough validation and assessment of the situation including the workarounds and alternatives to it.  Or have you heard of someone who's so gung-ho to initiate things but when impatience takes over himself, he's the first one to abandon things

Or things can boil down to your very own health.  Heard of narratives when he was manifesting various symptoms of a potential illness but simply ignore it all?  OR heard of one illness that doesn't seem to worsen but instead a new illness comes to manifest then another new illness pops up until one day, the doctor declares that there are multiple organ failures, whew💎💎💎

Not to scare you, we DON'T want your life journey to get stalled along the way when it could have been avoided.  Or worst, we DON'T want your life journey to end up in utter failure because that might imply you failed to detect far ahead down the road the Tell-tale signs of RED FLAGS✅✅✅  

Do The Things You Love

 Do The Things You Love

Question:  Why do we need to do the things we love?  Good question indeed.  And the answer to that perplexing question is a five-letter word spelled H-A-P-P-Y.  Indeed, this should NOT be a 'HARD SELL'.  Simply recall the zillion times in the past you ended up HAPPY.  And what could be the COMMON DENOMINATOR?  Despite the variety of things you did or acted on, the likely COMMON DENOMINATOR is always spelled H-A-P-P-Y⏳⏳⏳

Billionaire Warren Buffett once said that the key to your happiness is to "DO SOMETHING YOU ENJOY ALL YOUR LIFE".  On a work-related comment, he further said: "I URGE YOU TO WORK IN JOBS THAT YOU LOVE.  I THINK YOU ARE OUT OF YOUR MIND IF YOU KEEP TAKING JOBS THAT YOU DON'T LIKE BECAUSE YOU THINK IT WILL LOOK GOOD IN YOUR CV/RESUME".  It is true there are risks involved in chasing after that dream job.  Fact is, you just DON'T wake up one day and quit your job but when you do discover the work that will spring you out of bed every morning, it will be worth it📌📌📌

Who doesn't know the things he/she loves?  For a doting parent, spending time with one's kids can't be topped by anything else better.  Who doesn't love a good hobby?  They offer a break from the daily grind.  Opportunities to get together with friends.  Light at the end of the work shift schedule.  But did you know hobbies also have physical and mental health benefits?  And it doesn't matter whether your chosen pastime is intense or mellow💊💊💊

Yessssss, this poster seems closer to our hearts because most of us have day jobs.  Where NEGATIVE emotions creep within your work situation, DECOMPRESS!  Release the tension with calming and rhythmic thoughts.  Medical studies have proven that with lower STRESS LEVELS, a lower heart rate and a better mood is NOT far-fetched to happen close to the heels💎💎💎

TICK all the boxes but how?  Start off by challenging your mind, boosting your brain.  Expand your interests.  Engage in activities like music and arts as it's been proven that they reduce stress and even enhance confidence.  Keep things simple.  DO THE THINGS YOU LOVE [and not pursuing things rammed through your throat [because you can get choked]✅✅✅