Mixing Up ANXIETY Versus CURIOSITY

Mixing Up ANXIETY Versus CURIOSITY

Quite often, Mixing Up ANXIETY Versus CURIOSITY is concerning.  To align and ensure we DON'T get mixed up, allow me to quote the below definitions:  CURIOSITY is a non-judgmental inquisitiveness whereas ANXIETY is experienced as a threat of some kind [real OR imagined] versus CURIOSITY which can be just wondering about a non-emotional aspect of something.  So can ANXIETY and CURIOSITY happen at the same time?  As per experts, WHEN WE ARE IN THIS STRESSED STATE OR POTENTIALLY ANXIOUS STATE, THEN WE CANNOT BE CURIOUS AT THE SAME TIME📗📙📘

So, that's the stark contrast between ANXIETY versus CURIOSITY.  While ANXIETY can be driven as a habit by triggering worry as a mental behavior, despite that false sense of control, worrying ISN'T helpful whereas CURIOSITY is more rewarding for our brains.  Problem is, worrying comes easy to us.  We seem too quick and nimble in playing the mind's keys to compose our cacophonous masterpieces💴💷💵

In our moments of flow, we tend to become one with our ANXIOUS ruminations and in the end, lose track of reality.  We too are staggeringly creative.  Even when things are going well, we tend to agonize over imagined reversals of misfortunes.  Those lots of unnecessary WHAT IFs.  Banishing worry from our lives altogether may be a tall order.  BUT what is possible is to change our relation to it, hold our instruments with a tighter grip .  Here's the GOOD NEWS though.  Psychologists state that embracing CURIOSITY can even help to halt ANXIETY📌📌📌

So what does CURIOSITY really mean?  Researchers state that it is the desire to take in a new knowledge and experience.  It is that mindset that can STOP your ANXIOUS brain from thinking of every 'worst case scenario'.  Because whereas ANXIETY drives FEAR, CURIOSITY invites WONDER.  Studies show that when we seek new knowledge, scary feelings like uncertainty, SHRINK💎💎💎

So what's the experts' recommendation?  FOLLOW YOUR CURIOSITY.  As CURIORITY activates the same reward centers of our brain that light up when we learn something new or accomplish a goal, CURIOSITY also helps to temper DISTRESS and it makes us LESS DEFENSIVE and LESS REACTIVE to stress.  With all these benefits arising from our CURIOSITY not seemingly palpable, it takes a conscious effort for us to recognize the value and benefits of CURIORITY because it's about time we put to a stop the confusion caused when mixing up ANXIETY and CURIOSITY✅✅✅

Your HITS & MISSES In Life

Your HITS & MISSES In Life

How's your locomotive train going so far?  Have you counted Your HITS & MISSES yet?  If your response is NOT in the affirmative, that is a potential RED FLAG  because, by now, if you DON'T have your data for Your HITS & MISSES In Life, there is simply NO way to collect such data retroactively.  BUT again let's NOT cry on spilled milk.  If you haven't lifted your finger to Your HITS & MISSES In Life, Your HITS & MISSES In Life, as the WAZE Apps says, LET'S GO💵💴💷

Remember, the reason the AMAZING RACES were so successful for so many years across so many countries is because, the reality is that our life is akin to the AMAZING RACES no less. And as we progress in those vaunted AMAZING RACES, we will realize that we cannot be an expert in one skill and then everything will fall into place📗📙📘

So, you might challenge me, what's the beef about our HITS & MISSES In Life?  Point is, in life, whether it's our personal life OR at our work life OR at our business forays, our performance and even progress [or even NON-PROGRESS] need to be measured.  Can we imagine going through the motions of our daily life with NO metrics. NO measurements❓❓❓

So, you might challenge me, WHY do we need to know our HITS & MISSES In Life?  Our response is fairly straightforward here.  By being aware of our HITS & MISSES, we can pat our backs and beat our chests for all the HITS, so that should further boost our self-motivation, energizing and sustaining our successes.  For the our MISSES, that is part of our PULSE CHECK to know WHERE WE STAND and what's our progress [or even NON-PROGRESS till to date]✅✅✅

Let's take the worst case scenario wherein we are totally unaware of our HITS & MISSES? That is a scary proposition, if I were to state my case in subtle terms.  And if you incurred tons and tons of misses, HOW, WHEN and WHAT will you need to work on, to rectify mistakes, to refine and re-tweak near-HITs and turn it to legitimate HITs?   Dude, if you haven't done this yet, track and monitor your HITS & MISSES starting now, pronto❗❗❗

We All Have The Same AIRTIME

We All Have The Same AIRTIME

Who says we were NOT born equal?  I can be the son of an ordinary John Doe and he/she could be the child of Elon Musk BUT I just DON'T care.  WHO cares anyway?  Contrary to some disconnect that keeps widening, We All Have The Same AIRTIME in life.  AIRTIME in terms of OPPORTUNITIES.  BTW, did you know that despite Elon Musk's position at the top of the totem pole, do you know that he NEVER finished his university schooling?  So, that's it, one's social status or standing is even irrelevant to talk about.  So, where do all these lead towards❓❓❓

When I was in High School, many of my classmates were exchanging notes with regard their upcoming plans for their target universities, of course, at our country's capital city.  WHEREAS, I myself, coming from a family upbringing peppered with financial struggles, I dipped inside my small piggy-bank then and bought a book about careers📗📙📘

Did my distressing situation ever deter me at that time?  No sirrrrrrs.  On the other hand, I was readying and warming up all my cylinders because I well knew it that I will NOT be plunging in a sprint BUT a marathon contest.  It will be a TEST of WILLS, enough for me to define the end point where I will end up❗❗❗

When my contemporaries and close friends at work departed one by one, migrating to the United States, to Down Under [in Australia and even in New Zealand], you might ask me, how was the pressure on me considering that I seem to be eating the dust as the rest of the pack have come and gone💎💎💎

Frankly, those comings and goings was to me, no more no less NEUTRAL things that were irrelevant to my own personal pursuits.  Being so focused with my pre-set goals, I plotted my own timelines which were so realistic to a 'T' such that I was utterly in TOTAL CONTROL of my own trajectory and even its timings.  Fast-forward, in due time that time, I eventually migrated to Singapore ON MY OWN TERMS as I always believe that WE ALL HAVE THE SAME AIRTIME✅✅✅

NO Energy, NO Problem

NO Energy, NO Problem

No sirrrrs, our thread today has got nothing to do with electrical OR battery sources but instead, this is all about our own ENERGY levels which, by analogy, we can compare to energy sources.  BUT surprisingly, when we say NO Energy, NO Problem, it's because there are either quick or DIY fixes which we can leverage on🔖🔖🔖

The most common ROOT CAUSE of low Energy levels is TIREDNESS.  Even before we end up rushing to consult the GP, a proven effective way to keep up your ENERGY through the day is to eat regular meals and healthy snacks every 3 to 4 hours rather than indulging in heavy meals [ooooops, apologies, I am putting up here a farcical facade that I'm an expert in this field, NO sirrrrs]💎💎💎

Next practical DIY is to GET MOVING.  We might feel that exercise is the last thing on our mind.  BUT in fact, regular exercise will make you feel less TIRED in the long run, so that should give you more Energy.  Even a single 15-minute walk can give you an energy boost and the benefits increase with more frequent physical activity.  So, let's try starting with a small amount of exercise.  Build it up gradually over weeks and months until you reach the recommended goal of 2 hours 30 minutes of moderate-intensity aerobic exercise such as cycling or even brisk walking💵💷💶

Next off, if relevant, LOSE WEIGHT to GAIN ENERGY.  In case your body is carrying excess weight, that can lead to exhaustion.  It also puts undue extra strain on your heart, which can make you tired.  LOSE WEIGHT and you'll feel much more energetic.  Apart from eating healthily, the best way to lose weight and keep it off is to be more active and pursue more exercise initiatives.  Next off, oh, this is a no-brainer.  SLEEP WELL.  Unfortunately, many people DON'T get the sleep they need to stay alert through the day.  Practical tips:  GO TO BED and GET UP in the morning at the same time everyday.  Avoid naps✅✅✅

Next off, this is tough.  REDUCE STRESS.  Sadly, STRESS uses up a lot of energy.  try to introduce relaxing activities into your daily schedules.  Working out at the gym.  Yoga. Tai Chi.  Listening to music.  Bottom line is, WHATEVER RELAXES you will improve your Energy.  Now for a tougher call.  Cut out caffeine.  GP's all advise in unison that when we feel tired, we should cut off caffeine urgently, albeit gradually over a 3-week period.  No rocket science here but where you got NO Energy, NO Problem❗❗❗

What Is The BIGGEST Room

What Is The BIGGEST Room

What Is The BIGGEST Room?  It's neither your living room nor mine.  We're referring to ROOMS for IMPROVEMENTS in our life as the biggest room.  A bit of history here, this motivational quote came about way back 1862 and popped up again in 1911.  In short, for over a century, the biggest room in the world has remained the ROOM FOR IMPROVEMENT.  It doesn't matter WHO you are or your stage in your life⏳⏳⏳

If there is a BIG DON'T, it is NOT to compare yourself to others and become discouraged.  Just like you, they have ROOM FOR IMPROVEMENT.  Simply put, FOCUS ON YOURSELF.  Seek to make improvements in your life daily.  Realize that NO one ever reaches perfection.  Thing is, this notion of IMPROVEMENT sounds so simple and non-controversial BUT it is anything but that.  For IMPROVEMENT to be systemic and continuous requires fundamental change in the way people work together.  And the very first characteristic is the ability to fulfill one's unique potential.  The others are coping with the normal stress of daily living, working productively and participating meaningfully in the community💴💷💵

So, the bigger question is:  HOW DO WE FULFILL OUR UNIQUE POTENTIALS?  A given here is that each of us brings something to the table but the biggest opportunity arises when we identify our strong points and consolidate them while resolving the work on one's current WEAK POINTS and transform them into areas of strength💎💎💎

This realization, that we are NOT static beings and that every single day we wake up and draw breath is a fresh opportunity to do better and to strive continuously for SELF-IMPROVEMENT and SELF-ACTUALISATION.  All these are based on the factual premise that each and every one of us is unique and different from each other person.  This is evidenced by the fact that we all have unique fingerprints and DNA for instance📌📌📌

Let us be mindful though that NO two individuals, NOT even identical twins, will have the same 'fingerprints'.  Deriving from the above is the need to stay in our OWN LANE and live our own life without unfair comparisons to others because YOU are different.  While STAYING IN OUR LANE, it will be foolhardy for us to simply resign ourselves to our respective areas of STRENGTHS while neglecting our glaring WEAKNESSES.  That will lead us then to The BIGGEST Room✅✅✅

When Recovery Is A Bear

When Recovery Is A Bear

Anyday anytime anyone falters and falls.  Then we try to pick up the pieces, sometimes struggling despite that will be backed by waning power and energy.  BUT hey, that is a reality we all need to accept.  There is NO antidote or QUICK FIX for that.  At the very least, When Recovery Is A Bear, there are fundamental GIVENs that we need to accept and embrace.  Refusing and rejecting When Recovery Is A Bear is a trap we DON'T want to get caught💴💷💵

I remember myself going through surgical operation [very first time in my life] two years back and while everything was blurry, I can vividly remember I repeatedly recited some prayerful verses [over and over again].  At that point in time, I was unaware or clueless if recovery will be a bear for me.  Up until today, I managed to gather all my realizations if/when we end up When Recovery Is A Bear.  Topping the best practices is ACCEPTANCE.  Never regret OR be remorseful if you are in that situation because that's force majeure and in legal parlance, moot and academic📗📙📘

So, I believe I did the correct first step post-operation wherein I felt that inner GRATITUDE that brought me in that situation.  GRATEFUL that I did overcome the hump.  GRATEFUL that the medical procedure was the best FIX possible for me.  Thereafter, I ensured my support structure was SOLID AS A ROCK.  Being with POSITIVE PEOPLE puts forward at least one toe up front💎💎💎

Alas, we get hounded with so many 'horror' stories but very few crisis can beat the aftermath of disasters and traumatic events in our life.  The risk here is that following a traumatic event, by human nature, we tend to stunned, disoriented or even unable to integrate [or digest] distressing information✅✅✅

Fact is, our most common manifestation after a crisis would hit us is being anxious, nervous, overwhelmed or even grief-stricken.  So, all these boil down to COPING.  And with urgency, one has to ADJUST and ANTICIPATE that you will go through a difficult phase in life When Recovery Is A Bear❗❗❗

Make It Look EASY [Even If It's NOT]

Make It Look EASY [Even If It's NOT]

Surely you had those insane moments when things were so hard simply because indeed they were damn hard.  BUT had you ever had those moments when you Make It Look EASY [Even If It's NOT]?  You might [wrongly] think now that it's a folly to Make It Look EASY [Even If It's NOT] but would you agree figuring things out that way will do wonders for you📌📌📌

No sirrrrs, I'm NOT soft-selling Meghan Trainor's billboard hit DONT I Make It Look EASY.  But think of performers, be they are athletes, dancers, musicians.  If they have a singular commonality, they all Make It Look EASY [Even If It's NOT].  Oh, even at the workplace, I can attest I had GREAT BOSSES.  I do salute them because they always seem to know what to do and they seem to do it with flair YET effortlessly.  To them, problem solving seemed easy.  They know how to handle dicey interpersonal issues, even those for clients📗📙📘

Now let's dissect these GREATS.  First off, no GREAT performer or GREAT boss got good all the time.  It really takes time to get comfortable with the BASICS of the work, the trade itself.  Then it takes time to DEVELOP the skills we need to Make It Look EASY [Even If It's NOT].  So, can we replicate their feat?  SURE why not.  First off, PLAN.  Make that conscious choice about WHAT you're going to work on and WHAT you're going to do👲👲👲

Then, ACT.  Endeavor to do it, attempt doing it.  Fact is, the first time you will attempt to do anything will be damn tough. It will NEVER go perfectly right the first time or even the second time.  As the old cliche goes, PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT. And keep remembering you're working on this because that is the best path towards perfecting that capability🔰🔰🔰

Word of caution though.  Although we are so focused with PERFECTION as part of our mantra, NEVER forget that PERFECTION can be light years away from where you stand now but as you develop that capability. Making It Look EASY [Even If It's NOT] will add unquantifiable dividends to your self-esteem and self-confidence even as the roads are rough and bumpy ahead✅✅✅

UNLEARNING Is A Must-Do In Life

UNLEARNING Is A Must-Do In Life

All along, we have been preaching and pushing for LEARNING, pitching that LEARNING IS A LIFELONG PROCESS.  Very true indeed.  BUT when did we realize that UNLEARNING Is A Must-Do In Life as well?  Oh, surely you have your fair share of people you admire for their respective SUCCESS STORIES, right?  Next thing, figure it out, WHAT do they have in common?  They doubled down on habits, behaviors and actions that made all the difference to their goals.  True, UNLEARNING has its negative connotations.  However, it DOESN'T mean you are NOT that smart or capable💊💊💊

UNLEARNING is letting go of OLD assumptions, beliefs, patterns, habits and thought patterns that NO longer serve you at all.  And rather than remaining stagnant in our OLD WAYS, why DON'T we invest our time in building new ones that are more aligned with WHO we want to be.  To quote Anthisthenes, the great Greek philosopher, 'THE MOST USEFUL PIECE OF LEARNING FOR THE USES OF LIFE IS TO UNLEARN WHAT IS UNTRUE"📗📙📘

In fact, I'm hoping I DON'T need to do a 'hard sell' to you my dear reader this 3 PHASES of LIFE because this encapsulises the LEARNING Cycle in our life.  UNLEARNING here means taking a NEW look at something and seeing differently [compared to how you see it in the past].  That becomes an essential process of developing a more profound wisdom and self-awareness.  And, when you beef it up with the 'right mindset', UNLEARNING can lead to much greater SUCCESS ahead in your life💵💴💷

Frankly, what exactly should we UNLEARN?  Primero.  That NEGATIVE SELF-TALK.  How we talk ourselves can significantly impact our confidence and self-esteem.  NEGATIVE SELF-TALK can hold us back.  Let us replace that NEGATIVE SELF-TALK  with positive affirmations to further build and boost our self-confidence.  Segundo.  COMPLACENCY.  It's easy to become complacent when things are going well.  However, being too comfortable can prevent us from taking risks and even pursuing opportunities.  Try to start challenging yourself and push yourself outside of your comfort zone📌📌📌

The old cliche tells us that as we mature in age, we eventually mature even as a person.  BUT have you heard one with low self-esteem during the university days and a decade after, that self-esteem has dipped farther?  OR that alcoholic during his teens and these years as a grandpa, he has evolved to be a 'hard core' alcoholic?  Indeed, UNLEARNING IS A MUST-DO in life❗❗❗

Some Stuff Just Won't FLY

Some Stuff Just Won't FLY

Years ago, I was attending a forum where Oracle's then CEO Larry Ellison keynoted the event and was sharing to the audience how he envisioned how things will be seamless when he arrives his home and leaves the next day [just like Siri, the iPhone's virtual assistant].  Eventually, the geeks and experts introduced us to the INTERNET of THINGS [IOT].   BUT hey, some stuff just won't FLY📗📙📘

Recently, someone quipped to me that if he knew he will sitting down in front his laptop for 10-12 hours a day, he would have NOT accepted that kind of job.  WAIT when pandemic struck.  He NOW realized that YES HE CAN.  Truth is, you could be an event organizer, a veterinarian, a handyman or even a housewife, you'll need a device, whether that's a laptop or a gadget.  So, WHO says that it's either your WAY or NO WAY? Again, some stuff just won't FLY💎💎💎

So, why do children love mascots to the extent they wanna hugggggggggg them FOREVER? It's because the kids cherish endless happiness and they thought that's what mascots really are.  BUT again, some stuff just won't FLY.  Now, let's swing to our own comfort zones wherein your wish is WHAT comes true to form, where your WANT is what's followed, where HOW you feel is WHAT matters.  BUT hey, that's a utopian state that remains fictional till today📌📌📌

Let's swing to our personal interactions with our buddies and close friends.  How familiar is this story wherein it used to be, they had weekly ZOOM calls with enabled cameras too till those weekly forays eroded to texting [sending SMS] and of late, "KEEP UP" and some exchanges of memes and other 'witty' things they share on-the-fly but did you hear that that at that point, there is less going in depth?   Again, some stuff just Won't FLY✅✅✅

OR you could be that ballerina/dancer who dutifully practices her trade but even in the aftermath of that pandemic, you would still observe that ballerina/dancer so dutiful in her practices but in the hollowed halls, she is with her mentor, dutifully watched virtually that is.  What's our takeaway today?  MAKE DO with WHAT we have because some stuff just won't FLY❗❗❗

How Are We As 'ACTORS IN LIFE'

How Are We As 'ACTORS IN LIFE'

Are we all aware that we are 'ACTORS IN LIFE'?  Honestly, I was NOT aware of this fact NOT until years passed when I came with this realization, THAT when I speak, I speak differently when I'm talking to my boss versus my client versus THAT typical restaurant waiter OR butler.  Oh yes, isn't that a very valid realization?  I admit I talk quite differently to each of those scenarios.  NOT to a fault and without bad faith, we tend to auto-tweak ourselves.  So, why DON'T we deep-dive as regards our human behaviors manifesting differently across different scenarios📗📙📘

Apparently, people change the way they speak based on the STATUS of the person wo whom they are talking.  So, have we ever wondered WHY people change the way they speak in certain situations?  Researches show that people tend to change the pitch of their voice depending on to WHOM they are talking and HOW dominant they feel in a particular context📌📌📌

Conclusively, studies show that individuals' vocal characteristics are altered in response to people of different social status.  Regardless of self-perceived social status, people tend to talk to those they consider high status individuals using a high pitch.  Without being gender biased, studies also show that for men, a deep, masculine voice sounds dominant especially in men, while the opposite is true of a higher pitched voice💵💴💷

If there is something common between genders, both alter their pitch in response to people they think are dominant and/or prestigious.  Another sharp observation is that for people who consider themselves to be dominant [those who use methods like coercion, manipulation or intimidation], they are LESS LIKELY to vary their pitch and will instead talk in a lower tone when talking to someone of a high social status❗❗❗

Our key takeaway today? For the minority WHO do not change HOW loud they are speaking [no matter WHO they are talking to], that likely means that they are more CALM and in CONTROL of a situation.  So let's rethink HOW we talk from the time we wake up till we hit the sack.  If only we As 'ACTORS IN LIFE', would be welcoming if we can further tweak our own selves✅✅✅