From ORDINARY To EXTRORDINARY

 

For the longest time, WHEN someone is tagged as 'ORDINARY', it somehow implies that he's languishing in the cellar, a cellar-dweller at that, sort of 'eating the dust' of the pacesetters, the leaders of the pack.  WHEREAS, the 'EXTRAORDINARY' ones seem to be atop and highly perched in their pedestals, seemingly elusive to catch and reach, and often given more awe and respect insofar as accomplishments and milestones are factored in.  YET, the truth of the matter is that all that separates ORDINARY from EXTRAORDINARY is that five-letter word spelled E-X-T-R-A📘📙📗

And if we have to quantify and differentiate thar ORDINARY versus EXTRAORDINARY, my very safe guess is that the gap between being ORDINARY versus EXTRAORDINARY is NOT huge enough, NOT even as wide as the English Channel and instead, enough for someone to uptick his efforts even for an EXTRA 1% more.  This differentiation between ORDINARY and EXTRAORDINARY  highlights the importance of going above and beyond WHAT is expected in oder to succeed in a specific endeavor.  WHAT it does suggest is that even a small amount of EXTRA effort, attention to detail OR even creativity can turn an ORDINARY experience OR outcome into something EXTRAORDINARY💢💢💢

Frankly, I've heard 'GOING ABOVE and BEYOND' a zillion times BUT WHAT this suggests is that we must be willing to do more than WHAT is expected of us.  We must go above and beyond WHAT is expected and/or needed from us.  Putting that EXTRA effort may mean 1% more than WHAT it should be BUT WHAT's another 1% or even 10%?  And obviously, within those upticks of EXTRAs, sometimes WHAT goes along with is our own appetite to take added OR EXTRA risks and maybe try new things.  YES, that would mean adding ounces of proactiveness, creativity & commitment as well💥💥💥

One obscured behavior WHICH I have witnessed multiple times is one's attention to details.  Doing and taking that little EXTRA often involves being meticulous and detail-oriented enough, taking the time to ensure that everything is done to the best of our ability.  That EXTRA attention to detail can make a hell of a difference in achieving your goal at that level of excellence [and NOT just for the heck of doing it].  In brief, this is akin to standing out even in the midst of a mamooth crowd out there💜💛💚

Our takeaway:  Going from ORDINARY to EXTRAORDINARY is no mean feat BUT if at all, it's all about cultivating the right mindset up front.  To be EXTRAORDINARY involves that need to hone that growth mindset , being open to new ideas and experiences, and embracing challenges and setbacks as opportunities for growth and learning.  YES, that requires us to be persistent and resilient all rolled into one😀😀😀

How's Our DIGITAL LIFE

 

HOW's YOUR DIGITAL LIFE?  OR, have you ever paused and given that question a chance to ponder on?  Quite a few times recently, folks did pose me that same question as they all shared one concern, and that is sorting out their own DIGITAL LIVES.  True, there's an avalanche of digital information coming our way and WHAT else do we feel except that feeling LIKE it's all piling up and LIKE it seems messy???

From overflowing mail inboxes and messaging apps, to dozens of browser tabs and endless files on your device, to tasks and information [WHICH we still insist to keep track].  Allow me to share my no-brainer steps taken to date to allow me to SIMPLIFY things [to the best I can within my modest means]:

KISS [Keep It Simple, S___] - Remember, it's hard to organize WHEN we have millions of things to organize.  BUT my basic ground rule is so basic:  SIMPLIFY before ORGANIZING.  For all those pendencies, give others a quick reply if you can do so in less than a minute💥💥💥

Next BEST PRACTICE I have is to 'SILO' all the various stuff, i.e. for the tons of emails, for those I tag as important, i archive them in their respective folders.  For those browser tabs, regardless of the browser you often use, I would then bookmark those open tabs and put them in folders and if the tabs are that important, I would take the time to find a place for them.  For those tons of notes and docs, my practical advice is NOT to go to that rabbithole of trying to find the perfect syste [because there is NEVER  a perfect one].  Regardless if you're using Google Docs, One Note, etc, I'd create folders/tags for the info and docs for them to be grouped.  Retrieving becomes a breeze then💚💛💜

For your TO-DO tasks, seriously there is NO perfect system BUT my ground rule is fairly simple and that is, ALL tasks I need to take action on a given day must ALL be actioned.  And that's WHERE my TO-DO list can be a bit fluid and dynamic because priorities change.  Your top priority task yesterday can be relegated and pushed back because of a couple of hi-prio tasks come next day😡😡😡

Our takeaway:  NOT so long ago, WHEN Apple releases the latest iPhone, the high-end storage is 64gb.  Today, even a 1TB storage is pretty much normal.  WHAT this tells us is WHILE storage costs are becoming more affordable, that's the cadence-like strategy even from the OEM's because of the quantum leaps of digital information swarming all over us through the years.  So, HOW's YOUR DIGITAL LIFE???

When Is ENOUGH ENOUGH?

 

HOW often have you splurged on a new phone, a new wristwatch, OR maybe a special pair of shoes, and then, weeks later, it feels ordinary  OR worst, you're NOT even using it?  WHY this happens to almost anyone of us is something more puzzling than we could have thought of.  I myself I've been through a hell lots of frenzied UPs and DOWNs, especially those 'UPs' where we'll declare that we seem to be walking in 'Cloud 9'?  So, WHEN IS ENOUGH ENOUGH???

In Psychology, the experts have came up with the HEDONIC ADAPTATION theory, that psychological concept WHEREIN people tend to return to a stable baseline level of happiness after experiencing major positive OR negative life events.  And those rare phenomenons would explain WHY significant life changes [LIKE getting a job promotion, having your new spanking car OR even winning a major LOTTO purse name it], all of these will initially cause either a surge OR dip in our levels of happiness💥💥💥

And a consistent observation is that those surges OR dips would eventually fade over time [most of the time within the near term] and eventually we would adjust those new circumstances and return to our personal level aptly termed by experts as 'HAPPINESS SET POINT'.  Perplexing ASK to us is this:  WHY DO WE GET USED TO THE THINGS WE THOUGHT WOULD MAKE US HAPPY?  It might seem LIKE after getting WHAT you want, we reach into that so called 'adaptation-level' phenomenon, that term describing HOW we humans become insensitive to new stimuli and quickly readjust to an emotional baseline💚💛💜

WHICH simply explains as to WHY the stimulus needed to create an emotion needs to be more intense than the last/most previous stimulus in order for someone to feel its effect.  Imagine a kid WHO's craving for an ice cream and you surprise him with an extra scoop.  That will excite him at that point in time.  Come next time, try buying him the same ice cream with that same extra scoop, I'll bet that kid will NOT get excited anymore.  Instead, maybe you offer an extra toppings like 'cookies and cream' etc.  To piggy-back on the jargons in Psychology, hedonic consumption [that practice of people purchasing goods OR services for pleasure [once their basic needs get fulfilled] and hedonic value [WHICH refers to the personal value based on the pleasure derived from something that a person places on something😌😌😌

Our takeaway:  Various researchers have attempted to examine that hedonic treadmill phenomenon and have even attempted to determine HOW MUCH our happiness is really under our control.  And here comes the 50/40/10 RULE FOR HAPPINESS which tells us that a full 50% of our happiness set-point is due to genetics WHILE 10% is affected primarily by circumstances LIKE WHERE we were born and to WHOM.  That leaves 40% that is subject to our influence.  HOW much and HOW we sway and swing with that 40% variable becomes our call dude!!!

Is Reading Worth It?

 

Reading Worth It?  Good question BUT before we deep dive into that, allow me to share this memory recall.  Many times in my past flights, in fact 99.99% of my flights, once we're airborne, WHEN the plane is at its cruising altitude and WHEN the cabin lights have been turned off, and WHEN a majority of the passengers are either already deep asleep OR trying to catch a sleep, my seat [Oh yes, most of the time, I'm seated @Coach except for the few times WHEN I enjoyed my business trip entitlement] is often one of a literal handful with the pinlights turned ON.  Even as I'm oblivious of the othe handful of lighted seats, I'll admit that WHAT keeps my seat lighted all throughout my flights is all because of READING📗📙📘

BUT as I am NO expert to pitch and push everyone to spend more time READING [given their own priorities], allow me to share a research from the University of Sussex WHICH showed that by spending at least six minutes of READING, stress levels were reduced by 68 percent.  And the researchers added that READING works better and faster than other methods like listening to music OR taking a short walk💥💥💥

More studies supported that recent research as there are many reasons for the profound stress relieving effect of READING, amongst others:

• It allows our mind to concentrate on the words [and pull the reader away from anxious thoughts]
• It creates the effect of suspending reality wherein WHEN we read, it tends to alleviate tensions even deep in our heart and muscles

One of the most quotable quotes I always hear is 'AN APPLE A DAY KEEPS THE DOCTOR AWAY'.  Can I match that with this:  A BOOK A WEEK [or a month] CAN KEEP THE GRIM REAPER AT BAY.  NOT to appear as a bookworm OR even as one who's intellectually obsessed, I stumbled across a study way back almost a decade back [2016 in fact] WHICH found out that READING for at least 30 minutes a day extended the lifespan by an average of two years [for those respondent-readers]💚💛💜

Our takeaway:  Allow me to qualify that a no nonsense READING involves READING through serious content as opposed to browsing OR even skimming [because WHILE the latter is a form of READING, at times, the READING quality gets compromised [I'll tag it as LOST!!!]  because the key objective in skimming is to get the gist or the main idea of a content.  And obviously you could miss a word OR two WHICH could be tangible and material enough.  Dude, my simple ASK is this:  WOULD you be willing to shave off [INITIALLY] 10 to 15 minutes of your social media screen time and divert it to meaningful READING [YES, even e-Books is very much fine!!!]😀😀😀

It's All About Setting EXPECTATIONS

 

Multiple studies have shown that the most common cause of frustrations in life is that failure to meet the EXPECTATIONS.  WHETHER that's a possible job offer, a financial windfall, a gift OR bonus, frustration arises WHEN neither of these all will even come into fruition.  Last week I was exchanging notes with a senior boss from Sun Life of Canada and he admitted that's he's too frank to a fault because WHEN he wants to promote someone, he'll confide it to the person even if CAN'T guarantee that the promotion will be approved.  YES, it's ALL ABOUT SETTING EXPECTATIONS💚💛💜

I remember, @ our workplace, I really ensured that I would remain tight-lipped UNLESS and UNTIL I am cocksure that a specific outcome OR result will materialize, if at all.  WHERE there was a 1% probability of NOT happening, I am averse to falsely raising expectations because that's the worst FAUX PAS I can ever commit.  True, SETTING EXPECTATIONS is beneficial to our life BUT again, it has to be realistic.  POSITIVE self-talk, practising gratitude and letting go are just a few ways you can focus on improving one's life and well-being.  YES, SELF-EXPECTATIONS can provide clarity, direction and accountability and those EXPECTATIONS should be realistic and focus on one's long-term goals.  YES, it can be hard to navigate expectations BUT there's NO other way BUT worm our way through that jigzaw puzzle of a road maze that will continue to challenge us down the road💥💥💥

Thing is, the NOT so obvious downside of SELF-EXPECTATIONS is that they can lead to avoidance , confusion OR worst, even fear.  And without POSITIVE ways to set and maintain EXPECTATIONS, we may expect experience obstacles that may prevent us from accomplishing a pre-set goal.  And WHILE the EXPECTATIONS can be hard to manage at times, one can be set up for SUCCESS!!!

You might be curious, DID I WALK THE TALK?  YES dude, allow me to share my below 2-cents:

• Determine EXPECTATIONS early on
• Develop that 'LET GO' mindset
• Hone your POSITIVE 'self talk'
• Give yourself TIME [NOT constantly pressed]
• Focus on WHAT you accomplished
• YES, APPRECIATE what you have
• YES, develop that self-confidence

Our takeaway:  As EXPECTATIONS could be coming from all possible quarters, it is imperative that we are able to discern as to FROM WHERE that EXPECTATION is coming from.  If it is from your immediate family, that should carry the heaviest weight.  WHETHER their EXPECTATIONS are on-track OR NOT, you have to give it the importance for validation.  WHATEVER endeavor you're engaged now, IT'S ALL ABOUT SETTING EXPECTATIONS😁😁😁

Never Belittle Those TINY-WHINY-LITTLE Habits!

 

These days, we are all enamored with either the BIGNESS or the 'BIG-TIMEness' of things in life.   BUT in today's fast-paced world we live in, it seems much easier to focus solely on the significant outcomes and milestones, results WHICH you can even showcase and shout to the whole world as an achievement.  Promotions, new car, new applicances, OH YES, even the latest iPhone17-18-19 name it.  BUT in reality and more quite often, it's those small-small seemingly insignificant actions that truly shape our lives and careers.  WHICH reminds me of this not-so-old quote:  HOW YOU DO ANYTHING IS HOW YOU DO EVERYTHING.  ,Never Belittle Those TINY-WHINY-LITTLE Habits💚💛💜

Despite our own vulnerabilities to tons and tons of illnesses and traps in life, paramount amongst all is our mental health because if it is NOT in a good place, WHO CAN't be feeling scary OR helpless?  Poor mental health can be brought on by a significant life event such as a loss, a breakup, OR even an unwanted OR unexpected changes in circumstances.  Other times, there may be NO obvious reason at all.  And WHEN that happens, indeed it can be hard to know HOW to make ourselves feel better, as we DON'T know WHAT could be causing the problem.  And WHEN we feel bad, we may even stop taking care of ourselves [ouch] and WHAT happens next, that leads to that dreaded vicious cycle that remains damn hard to break free from.  YESirrrrreee, making small life CHANGES can lead to a drastic [and positive] impact to our mental health [EVEN IF they appear insigificant at first]!!!

I heard this quite a few times.  WHEN we feel low, exercise might be the last thing on your mind.  And summoning our energy to move WHEN we feel depressed, OR CONVINCING yourself to go outside WHEN you feel anxious can be incredibly hard.  HOWEVER, experts tell us that exercise has been proven time and time again to be one of the most effective tools to improve our mental health💥💥💥

YES, many of us [and I'm one of them in the past] are guilty of being negative towards ourselves from time to time.  Oh Oh, NEGATIVE self-talk can really increase one's anxiety, depression and even lower our self-esteem.  Identifying WHEN we are being NEGATIVE to our own self and putting a more POSITIVE spin on things can indeed do wonders for our mental health.  Telling ourselves that we're feeling low will NEVER get better😌😌😌

Our takeaway:  Much as we have tons and tons of TINY-WHINY-LITTLE habits to consider, WHATEVER it is that may bring joy and happiness that would allow our mind to focus on something other than HOW we're feeling, YES go for it, DON'T ever have second-thoughts about it.  True it may be sometimes doubly hard to motivate our own selves to do things that would make us happy especially WHEN we tend to hit rock bottom.  BUT experts cousel us to try it, to do it because it can do wonders to our mental health.  In the shortest words possible, we are encouraged to really make time for ourselves and for the things we love.  Thing is, NEVER BELITTLE THOSE TINY-WHINY-LITTLE habits!!!

That Power Of Focus!

 

Have you ever sat down to work on something important and 15 to 20 minutes later, you're checking your phone?  OR rearranging your desk?  OR in that deep YouTube rabbit hole?  YES YES yowww, it happens to all of us, I was in that 'rabbit hole' many times in the past, all becauss FOCUS is damn slippery.  THAT POWER OF FOCUS.  we would normally start the day with the good intentions to finish off this task, to run that errand, to discuss with your spouse/partner your financial priorities and so on UNTIL distractions would steal our energy way before we even realize it, whew!@#$%?

If there's a recurring miss I would hear OR bear witness over and over again, it's the misconception that FOCUS is all about will power.  BUT it's NOT dude.  Instead, FOCUS is a skill, period.  And like any skill, you've got to hone it, make it sharp and later sharper as long as you consistently practice and execute it alongside a disciplined mindset.  NOW you might challenge me, questioning WHY I'm making a mountain out of a molehill WHEN it comes to FOCUS💥💥💥

The harsh reality in our global village is that we live in communities that train us to lose FOCUS.  In the bluntest terms, circumstances SET US UP to lose FOCUS.  Those smartphone notifications, endless scrolling, and a culture that rewards 'BUSYNESS" over 'PRODUCTIVITY" makes it almost impossible for us to deep-dive and get engrossed in a meaningful task OR work from end-to-end with hardly any distractions.  BUT looking back, I realized I did reap tons and tons of benefits arising out of being FOCUSED LIKE:

• LIKE that breakthrough idea that arose out of my stillness
• LIKE that project completion I made it by ignoring the world
• LIKE decisions I made WHEN I slowed down & had clarify

Truth is, our FOCUS-related problems are NOT that earth-shaking and it ISN'T because we lack ideas.  Instead, our legitimate problem is that we rarely protect our FOCUS long enough to bring them in life.  And frankly, much as we are aware HOW to avert OR pre-empt those distractions, we even become complicit [i'll call it GUILTY] to quickly succumb when distractions pop-up.  HOW can we fix things if we become a part of the problem INSTEAD being part of the solution???

Our takeaway:  The ramifications and consequences of our loss of FOCUS can't be understated, to rattle off its key impact areas:

• Ending up struggling to complete one's task
• Being prone to commit [avoidable] mistakes
• Ending up with LOW QUALITY kind of work
• That lack of energy would eventually lead one to tiredness & fatigue, a double-whammy at that!!!

Why Do We Procrastinate, SERIOUSLY!

 

Let's start off our light blog today with a giveaway question:  WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU DID PROCRASTINATE?  If I may guess, if it's NOT yesterday, it's last week OR within the last month?  YES, that's a blockbuster as we seem to keep breaking records in terms of PROCRASTINATION.  BUT before we whack ourselves, WHY DON'T we pause for a while and seriously ponder as to WHY DO WE PROCRASTINATE, SERIOUSLY???

NOT to defend the guilty parties [and that includes me a few times in the past], many PROCRASTINATORS know that that behavior [of PROCRASTINATING] really hurts them BUT they nevertheless keep doing it even though they want to stop.  There you go.  Many of us have that earnest desire to right the wrong BUT experts advise that before we take action, let's answer these perplexing questions:  WHY DO I PROCRASTINATE EVEN THOUGH I'M AWARE IT'S WRONG???

Experts tell us that answering these questions is a MUST-DO because in order for us to overcome PROCRASTINATION, it helps to understand WHAT causes it in the first place?  And the most common result of multiple studies tell us that we PROCRASTINATE because our DRIVE TO DELAY is irrationally stronger than that DRIVE TO ACT.  And this happens WHEN their self-control and motivation are weakened by issues LIKE exhaustion, and are opposed by issues LIKE fear.  YES, the DRIVE TO ACT represents HOW strongly we can push ourselves💙💛💚

Sometimes, a person's self-control can be influenced by HOW tired he is WHILE his motivation can be influenced by HOW long they will have to wait before they are rewarded for taking action.  And issues LIKE exhaustion and far-future outcomes can indeed interfere with our self-control and motivation and consequently reduce our own self-drive to act as can many other issues LIKE depression, ADHD, and even low self-efficacy.  And conversely, that DRIVE TO DELAY represents HOW strongly people feel pushed to avoid taking action at the moment✅✅✅

Our takeaway:  Much as PROCRASTINATION is NOT so-simple  to have a final fix, it makes sense we pin down the most common root causes LIKE:

• PRIORITIZATION of our short-term mood😡
• TASK AVERSIVENESS - because a task is boring
• ANXIETY & FEAR - afraid to be criticized???
• FEELING OVERWHELMED - that's all in the mind!
• PERFECTIONISM - that's bull____ !@#$%?
• LOW MOTIVATION - dude, got to arrest that skid!

Is Playing SAFE RISKIER Than Taking Risks?

 

For the longest time, we were taught and trained that we should always PLAY SAFE.  To further turn the waters murkier, we are reminded a zillion times of RISKS.  And a typical exclamatory statement is:  DON'T TAKE RISKs!  Seriously?  On the other hand, those living a free-wheeling life would blurt out:  NO RISK, NO GLORY.  You may then ask me, WHAT'S YOUR TAKE?  WHY is it when at times, PLAYING SAFE IS RISKIER THAN TAKING RISK?  This will be a wild and rowdy discussion BUT I like this thread then💚💛💜

WHILE I CAN'T claim to be an expert on this topic, I do have my fair share of experiences WHICH will guide me to share my 2-cents.  Firstly, if I look back, had I PLAYED SAFE, surely I am NOT as WHAT I am today.  NOT to blow my horn OR beat my chest, I can exclaim categorically that I would have tagged myself today as an utter failure IF I PLAYED SAFE all along through the years.  On the other hand, allow me to qualify that I am risk-averse, I took RISKS in a calculated approach and I DIDN'T take RISKS like when you go to the Las Vegas Casinos to splurge all your hard-earned monies😌😌😌

Thing is, WHEN the most risky thing to do is to PLAY SAFE, you've got to be bold and take some calculated risks.  Oh yes, the cost of living keeps going up north with spikes here and there, the value of my local currency remains volative, the situation in the Middle East between Israel and Iran is a powder keg that can ignite World War III and on that note, there is that constant threat of oil price increases💥💥💥

In the business landscape, we'll always hear 'LOW INVESTMENT, LOW RETURNs' BUT from an investor perspective, what matters is NOT the investment BUT the risks up front.  Are they risk averse OR will they throw and roll with the dice?  YES, a direct line can be drawn between RISKS and investing.  As a businessman/investor, it is your call and no one else's.  And that is NO different from the risks we face in life❎❎❎

Our takeaway:  I remember a colleague I once worked with.  He was sharp, well-spoken and absolutely dependable.  If you were his supervisor, you DIDN'T have to literally watch him 'over the shoulder' because he'll deliver the goods at the right time.  YET, after ten years in the company, he was still in that same role.  NO promotions, NO big projects, NO real recognition, WHILE others leapfrogged ahead.  WHY?  Is it because PLAYING SAFE IS RISKIER THAN TAKING RISKS?  That's very true, dude😡😡😡

The ALL-In ALL-Power of Words

 

Supposed, WORDS are WORDS and we should NOT even be bothered about it.  BUT seriously, the ALL-In ALL-POWER of WORDS is way too strong as it can be the catalyst for the best outcomes for both the POSITIVE and NEGATIVE words that get spewed out.  And admittedly, till to date, I always embrace that need to articulate the best possible POSITIVE words if I am genuinely happy with the service I received📗📙📘

Few days ago WHEN I was booking the rooms we needed @Conrad, the online bookings went through lightning quick BUT to my shock, the dates showed the current date [and NOT the dates we needed which was a week later].  Since both room bookings were completed via the 'advanced purchase' mode,  I was literally scampering that that error be rectified ASAP before my paid $$$$$ dissipated in thin air.  In a few minutes I was on the Conrad hotline, a call center agent attended to my urgent need for help BUT I observed that maybe I CAN'T feel that sense of urgency.  So, I hanged up the call and called the hotline again.  That time around, the call center agent did WHAT needed to be done, by cancelling the erroneous booking and initiating the new correct booking on my behalf.  Being satisfied, I asked for the name details of the agent whom I called a 'SUPERMAN' as I wanted to commend him✅✅✅

Enough of that hotel booking though.  A month back, I was at the local hospital fixing everything ob behalf my brother prior to his discharge.  And WHEN I was so impressed with the customer-centricity of one hospital staff, I intentionally went to the Customer Service Office [whose personnel reacted nervously WHEN I stepped in, thinking that I'll file a complaint] only to heave a sigh of relief WHEN I said I want to commend a specific hospital personnel that time😊😊😊

In short, we should NOT be stingy with WORDS WHEN it is to articulate our commendation and appreciation for someone BUT WHAT needs more caution is WHEN and IF we have that tendency for callousness with WORDS especially WHEN the receiving party of those WORDS DON'T really deserve its severity and harshness.  Moreover, WORDS are more often likened to those times way prior to the invention of computers and today's technology where tools and apps always offer that 'UNDO' function.  NOT in WORDS though because once it gets spewed, the impact will reverberate faster than you would even anticipate.  NO thanks to the power of WORDS❎❎❎

Our takeaway:  BTW, those impactful WORDS DON'T just happen verbally.  These days WHEN almost everyone has an email account, those emails have trapped and significantly cause damage to more relationships than ever, regardless if those are professional OR personal emails.  Sadly, many times I was seated at the 'front seat' witnessing harsh exchanges of words via email and I commiserate with both the offending party and the offended one because they both got trapped in those emails.  WHAT was lost between them is the consciousness and awareness HOW WORDS can get out-of-hand to even cause damage to both professional and personal relationships.  YES, that's all because of the ALL-in ALL-POWER of WORDS dude😡😡😡