Is The Needle Tilting In Your Favor?

 

Much as digitalization is happening everywhere [YES, even in religious places of worship], if there is one domain digitalization will be hard pressed to crack is that need to WEIGH THE BALANCE between the PROs and CONs.  That's WHEN we are caught in the crossroads [especially those FORKED ones] WHERE we have NO recourse BUT to come up with a decision, one way OR the other.  Then that's the right time ripe for us to ask ourselves this $64 question:  Is The Needle Tilting In Your Favor?  Otherwise, you got to give it a pass📗📙📘

Verily true, there are two ways to go about life.  You can go and work forward towards achieving the future you envision for yourself OR you can spend your life seated under the immense sheets of skies waiting for it somehow come around you, in your favor, at your advantage without lifting a finger.  So, seriously, are you really waiting for the STARS TO ALIGN?  LIKE WHEN the NEEDLE IS TILTING IN YOUR FAVOR?  Oooops, WHATEVER your answer is to this question, that can be really crucial💚💛💜

To be frank, your answer to that frank question could be the difference between getting stalled OR stuck and 'stagnant' till you grow old versus OR you can end up wise enough, on track until you can affirm that you've carved your name for that success story.  Here's the catch though.  It's only YOU WHO can call the shots [NO proxies, NO reps]💧💧💧

Very obviously, once you perceive the needle to be tilting in your favor, that should tell you to 'hustle your way' after those goals and things you're aiming for, hustling to one day waking up being and becoming that person you really wanted to be.  BUT here's the catch though.  Life DOESN'T boil down as to HOW much you hustle as you're the only one capable of ALIGNING THE STARS and creating the future you deserve.  So, are you still waiting for the STARS TO ALIGN!@#$%?  IF you're simply acting and reacting to the world around you, you could be waiting for things out of your control❎❎❎

Our takeaway:  Very frankly, WAITING means you are WAITING for something that may NEVER come OR happen as you act and react with NO boundaries, WITHOUT purpose and WITHOUT protecting WHO you so wish you could be.  The most frustrating words I heard the past years:  MY TIME HAS YET TO COME or I'LL  WAIT FOR THAT POSITION TO BECOME VACANT.  IS THE NEEDLE TILTING IN YOUR FAVOR😡😡😡

No Less Than Her Parent Advised Her: DREAM LESS

 

A month ago in Channelnewsasia, 08.12.2025, Filipina F1 car racer driver BIANCA BUSTAMANTE was featured.  NOT because of anything else BUT it is her remarkable climb, clawing slowly up up and up until she can achieve each of her pre-set 'mini' success milestones.  Allow me to paste here EN TOTO the Channelnewsasia piece.  QUOTE  No one expected her to make it this far. Manila-born Bianca Bustamante opens up about breaking barriers as the first female in the McLaren Driver Development Programme and what it means to fly the Asian flag in international motor racing💥💥💥

It’s your typical Asian family origin story – parents want their kid to study hard, become a doctor and have a stable, high-paying career. Here’s the plot twist: Kid doesn’t believe in taking the conventional path but decides to believe in herself from the moment she sits in a go-kart at age three instead.  In 2024, that self-belief culminated in Bianca Bustamante making history as the first female driver ever selected for McLaren’s Driver Development Programme.  “No one expected me to make it this far; not a little girl from the Philippines who came from a very middle-class family,” Bustamante shared via video call from her home in the UK where she is now based.

Historically, the world of motor racing is notoriously known for being accessible only to those who come from prodigious privilege and the sort of pedigree afforded by favourable parentage. It takes a tremendous amount of investment to hone a child’s driving skill starting in karting. Add to that the necessary travels to competitions around the world in the hopes of them developing sufficient proficiency to even get a shot at the big leagues.

“It's a very expensive sport that's often reserved for people with money,” Bustamante acknowledged. “So for me to make a career for myself in racing and travel the world, no one expected that, not even my own family. To be honest, I was told by family members to dream less,” she confided with nary a trace of resentment or bitterness.  In fact, the only moment Bustamante’s equanimity wavers ever so slightly during our hour-long chat is when she recounts how her father had often juggled three jobs to support her racing career in the early days UNQUOTE💚💛💜

Our KEY takeaway here is that, regardless of all the MOTIVATIONS coming from all quarters, WHAT matters most is our MOTIVATIONS from within.  Even WHEN Bianca was advised [NO LESS by her mom] to 'DREAM LESS', she NEVER heeded that advice BUT instead, went for 'full throttle'.  As we speak now, Bianca is a legitimate member of the UK-based McLaren development team, inching her way UP UP and UP🏆🏆🏆

When The Walls Are Closing In...

 

How often do we feel THE WALLS ARE CLOSING IN?  NOT so often I guess.  That did happen to me quite a few times in the past, so you might ask, WHAT was it like?  My curt reply:  I ready to run for my life and into my bunker, whew!  If we all share something in recent memory, I guess that was recently WHEN we all got hit with the Covid-19 pandemic WHEN we felt like the walls of our own homes were closing in on us.  As for myself, WHEN that feeling hovered over me, I knew I wanted to extricate myself out of the situation.  BUT I asked myself, WHERE do I seek refuge?  Unlike Israel WHOSE physical infrastructures have robust bunkers, I DIDN'T had one📗📙📘

In a typical situation, WHEN we feel trapped OR confined indoors, a walk outside usually helps.  NOT only do we want fresh air BUT we tend to be looking at different things as well.  Like a CHANGE of SCENERY can help WHEN you feel like the walls are closing in.  This gets more relatable in relationships, be it at work, at home OR with your 'bonafide' friends [and NOT just Facebook friends😑😑😑].  In the real world, those WALLS are those lingering in our minds 

At the workplace, one typical scenario is WHEN one feels stuck OR stalled as he's NOT progressing up the ladder, one could feel the WALLS have closed in.  LIKE WHEN people find themselves in a quite restrictive relationship with someone WHO seems to be having a tight rein and controlling the other party, it may feel like the WALLS ARE CLOSING IN.  SO HOW?  In one word, EXTRICATE yourself out of that situation BUT unfortunately, EXTRICATING requires you to take a deep stock of things💥💥💥

In those scenarios, a 'CHANGE OF SCENERY' is NOT found outside in the woods.  Instead, the change of scenery could be a new job or getting out of a relationship [and YES, creating a new one as well].  A safe synonym is that of being CLAUSTROPHOBIC because that's WHEN we feel the walls closing in on us.  Worst thing is WHEN the walls of anxiety are CLOSING IN.  That is a tough one to cope with😕😕😕

Our takeaway:  Knock on wood, unless something springs out a very tragic turn of events, generally in life, those WALLS WON'T be instantly closing in on you, on us.  Way prior to that, we must be sharp and incisive enough to discern and detect tell-tale signs that the walls are slowly showing signs of a 'rickety' state.  In a worst case scenario, it is to our best interest that we should NOT be a step late by more than one [step] BEFORE THE WALLS ARE CLOSING IN❗❗❗

Do We Judge Others By Their ACTIONS But Ourselves By INTENTIONS?

 

In this rowdy world we co-exist, it seems that many of us [a majority in fact] is a judge by him/herself.  We tend to have this idea that some things are right and others are wrong.  That kind of BLACK or WHITE stuff, whew!  YES, this seems to form the basis as to WHY we consider ourselves as perfect beings in some circumstances.  In the process of being that way, we become JUDGMENTAL and only our worldviews are real  REALLY?  Do We REALLY Judge Others By Their ACTIONS But Ourselves By INTENTIONS???

In the face of man, no matter how noble our intentions are, if the consequences of our action are bad, trust me, we will be judged badly and harshly NO less.  Without tainting cultures, in Nigeria, if you help a hit and run victim on the highway, you are kind of risking that dreadful 'life sentence'  OR at least a life imprisonment if the subject victim eventually dies.  YES, sadly, that is one big problem that even in this 21st century, a country like Nigeria does still prosecute such act blindly WHEREAS in the First World where functional CCTV's are normal, people DON'T get prosecuted for such a noble act.  WHAT explains that huge disparity???

In the judicial space, while I am NOT a lawyer, typically, a judge in a court of law will tend to focus more on the facts before him that provides supporting grounds to the case at hand instead of looking into the intentions of the accused.  WHILE I am NOT a constitutionalist, I would hear experts exclaim that "THIS OR THAT" was NOT what the law is all about because of its unstated intent and spirit behind the provisions of the law.  WHAT a paradox here, the law seems to sow confusion???

YES, it is also true that INTENTIONS may NOT be easily get perceived OR understood because we DON'T know WHAT the person was thinking before carrying that specific act.  HOWEVER, WHY do we want our personal INTENTIONS to be judged and NOT our actions?  ISN'T that quite an inconsistency that seems to throw that 'parity principle' out of the window???

Our takeaway:  We need to raise our consciousness by several notches [if NOT decibels] WHEN discerning WHAT is perceived versus WHAT is factual.  Is this HOW we are programmed from the beginning OR did our societal mores did influence our thought processes towards this direction?  Verily true, most of our behaviors [IF NOT ALL] are learnt from our respective societies.  It could be then somehow argued that society probably taught us to reason things that way.  So, DO WE JUDGE OTHERS BY THEIR ACTIONS BUT OURSELVES BY OUR INTENTIONS???

Get Off The Mat And Off To The Next Challenge

 

Back in our High School days, a common dilemma of us students was getting to school every morning with NO tardiness.  And I remember our High School teacher gave a sage advice which was:  WHEN YOU WAKE UP, RISE UP.  These days, we'll hear this more  Get Off The Mat And Off To The Next Challenge.  WHICH leads me to really ponder if WHAT matters most in our life is a CATALYST, something OR someone that causes change to occur and indeed, having that 'change agent' can be damn helpful💥💥💥

WHICH reminds me of 'CATALYST GOALS' in life.  HOW I did it [the damn hard way in the past], I did set goals, crystal clear and concrete enough.  And once I embedded my commitment to it, those pre-set goals became my very CATALYST to move forward.  I then realized that many times in the past, I've been tricking myself WHEN I did set my goals.  Instead of doing WHAT matters, I worked diligently through my to-do list, ensuring that I remained 'spot on'✅✅✅

BUT there were times WHEN sometimes, my legitimate goals were seemingly left out.  The culprit?  I realized I wasn't doing 'GOOD PLANNING' at all then.  I seemed to delay executing this OR that task so there were days, I did stare at my pre-set goal and was ready to push it and slide to another week WHEN it suddenly dawned on me that if I did roll up my sleeves and do WHAT I needed to do, I could have accomplished WHAT needs to be done.  WHAT's my lesson here?  If ONLY I had a TO-DO List those days.  That would have made me more diligent.  And verily true, working with 'CATALYST GOALS' would keep me motivated and differentiating my positive self versus someone WHO incessantly procrastinates.  Mother of all ironies during those difficult times WHEN I was doing a 'balancing act' of my multiple deliverables, I was unaware that I got trapped!!!

As I constantly struggled then with one too many stuff on my struggling pair of hands, often I would end up overwhelmed and, YES, burned out.  SO HOW did I extricate myself from the mud?  I asked myself these most basic confrontational questions:

• Does completing my goals push me nearer to my 'future self'?
• Can I avoid that trap as I do the balancing act handling one too many with my bare hands?
• Have I plotted initially small steps that will lead me to the eventual bigger steps?  OR am I [falsely] carrying that superman belief?

Our takeaway:  I remember this perennial reassurance in the past WHENEVER I fail.  My mentor kept reminding me that each time I fall flat on my face, I am an inch OR foot closer to my pre-set goals.  Fast-forward today, I would agree and disagree with my mentor because WHILE it's true that I can be an inch closer to my goals, the flip side of things can lead me to another setback WHERE I will be an inch or foot farther back from my goals.  This all boils down to one's gumptions to keep going, GET OFF THE MAT AND OFF TO THE NEXT CHALLENGE❗❗❗

Why The Plurality Remains As 'AVERAGE'?

 

So, WHY is it a plurality [if NOT a majority] of us remain 'AVERAGE [despite all the breakthroughs, motivations and pushing from all sides]?  Studies showed that there are people WHO seem to be in the right place at the right [and sometimes perfect] time.  LIKE everything works out for them.  LIKE the right breaks, LIKE right opportunities popping up at the right timing, and they even call it those 'ideal moments'.  For some, they call it 'LUCK'📗📙📘📗📙📘

BUT WHAT if we would hear that that is NOT exactly true?  THAT, sometimes to get better results, we DON'T need more effort BUT maybe just a better strategy.  And a few tweaks in the way we think [and act] can even be a catalyst to 'skyrocket' our performance, WHICH is quite 'magical' to come into fruition.  Oh YES, we can stack the odds in our favor and it's NOT even magic.  Instead, it's all about statistics because the numbers will show.  And studies did show that many variables follow a normal distribution and most values do cluster around the middle.  WHILE the extreme cases are outliers📌📌📌

As statistics is beyond my domain, allow me to make reference to researches that consistently show that most cases are centered around the middle.  And the norm is somewhere in between, like average height, average intelligence, average consumption and so on.  We can then use this statistical distribution as an innate mental model to understand the world out there as we assume that most things lie in the middle.  And that's true in some cases💥💥💥

And that's WHEN we all go wrong.  WHICH reminds me of the Pareto Distribution because the normal distribution is quite easier to understand BUT we live in an increasingly complex world.  And in our very tight world, things DON'T always cluster in the middle BUT instead, very often, then tend to concentrate at the extremes.  If we're in a marketing job and will send out an email blast, you could send thousands of generic mails OR send personalized mails💧💧💧

Our takeaway:  Looking back, I can opine that most people only think in averages, metrics and volume.  BUT the real value is WHERE no one's looking, in that corner of the graph WHERE effort and outcome AREN'T proportional.  WHERE a small, smart move yields a massive result.  WHERE one tiny, well-placed action is worth 10, 100 or even 1,000 times more, and that's WHERE the right breaks, right contacts, and perfect opportunities happen at those ideal timings.  And from the outside world, that's WHAT it's dubbed as 'LUCK' but it's more than just the alignment of stars because it behooves that we should kick things for us to go beyond just being an AVERAGE😌😌😌

Nothing Is Hard In Life, SERIOUSLY

 

Is LIFE HARD?  To be on the safe side, I'lle exclaim it's NEITHER EASY NOR HARD.  What is EASY for one may be difficult to another one.  WHAT is a no-brainer with one may be a steep mountain slope to climb up.  In fact, many times I stumbled across two colleagues with very similar job roles.  YET, it was easy for one and HARD for the other one.  WHAT more WHEN we do a mapping of all these in our respective lives?  This probably explains WHY we're witnessing a constant cacophony of noise in this quite rowdy world.  So, WHO concurs that NOTHING IS HARD IN LIFE?  Seriously dude💚💛💜

In multifarious ways, I have been observing that some of us would think that something is more worthwhile if it is difficult to achieve [OR even strangely] if it is painful to achieve.  Additionally, if the 'norm' is to do one type of  thing and someone comes up with an easier thing that broadly achieves the same goals, people end up getting caught in the norm and will likely NOT leap to celebrate and change their lives, rather some may mock and criticize the person WHO has found an easier way and enjoin them to come back to the HARD way.  True, some things are HARD and painful BUT also have that tangible benefit, like working hard at a skill OR sport OR perhaps putting money in a high interest savings account BUT that level of difficulty OR pain involved in an endeavor does NOT automatically indicate its worthiness💧💧💧

These days, regardless WHERE you reside now, life can truly be overwhelming these days.  And IF you're feeling LIKE the challenges you're facing seem to be way too much for you to handle, you're certainly NOT alone.  In a recent United States survey, the majority of the respondents placed their stress levels between a 5 and a 10 on a scale of 1-10.  YES, everyone seems to be a bit stressed out for one reason OR another💥💥💥

And, according to researches, our individual stressors would likely NOT be related to current societal issues at all BUT ironically, they could be exacerbated by these societal issues.  YES, life is inevitably HARD at times and I agree, there are one too many UPs and DOWNs BUT if we're feeling like our life is consistently difficult, trust me, day-in day-out, you would feel that constant struggle if that pervades and prevails within you almost constantly.  You might even find yourself pondering WHY everything feels so hard on you?  Truth is, everyone's journey is different.  Just because your peers DON'T seem to be struggling right now, they may be facing challenges privately for all you know😡😡😡

Our takeaway:  My personal take here is that, without really downplaying the hardness of life as being faced by people WHO feel more challenged, I would encourage ourselves look at the positive side of things, weigh in both UPSIDEs and DOWNSIDEs while giving heavier weight to the POSITIVEs.  LIKE many years ago WHEN I got involved in a major car accident, I was thankful that that incident hit me that time because that time, I had 2 things in life WHICH you would badly need WHEN you're involved in a major accident.  It is the combination of TIME + MONIES.  Admittedly, that time, I had both as we just received our redundancy pay settlements WHEN US-headquartered Borden Chemical formally ended its commercial operations in my country then.  In short, NOTHING IS HARD IN LIFE, seriously [except you have to sweat it out dude]😡😡😡

STAYCATIONS Are Not That Bad After All

 

For the longest time, I used to frown on those STAYCATIONS with cynical snide remarks LIKE:  That's NOT the quality way!  WHY spend $$$$$ just within the city?  WHY settle for less WHEN we can have much better than that?  BUT alas, I'm now EATING MY WORDS because recently, we hied off for a short STAYCATION and invited along our family friend [Mom & daugther] and we realized that that was the best decision we made to date📘📙📗

Surely everyone will agree we all need that kind of collective vacation, some serious self-care.  Between work stress, family stress and health stress, WHERE does that lead us to?  Taking a multi-week vacation to a far-flung destination may NOT be in the cards anytime soon.  NOT to mention our 2-week Japan holiday, to me, it's NOT just 2-weeks because that was 'half a year' in the making.  I was crawling through sites finding good flight and hotel deals, and booking [initially] just to keep my options open💙💛💚

You might suspect me to be exagerrating that that Japan holiday was 'half a year' in the making?  Frankly, lemme share this.  I had less than 10 flight bookings then cancellations ONCE I found a much better offer.  With hotels, as we were staying across 5 cities in Japan, probably I aggregated around 50+/- hotel bookings [both direct hotel portal bookings, via Agoda and Booking.com as well].  With direct hotel bookings, even if I was interested for the first time with a particular hotel chain, I registered with their rewards programs with the hope that I can leverage on membership benefits.  So, that led me to finally book [with finality with NIKKO hotels].  With our flight bookings, I believe we got the best deal as I leveraged on that 'juicy offer from ANA Airlines for that 'free extra domestic flight', which to me, was HUGE in terms of $$$$$😁😁😁

Some insightful sharings here with regard our recent STAYCATION:

• We literally enjoyed every minute together with our family friends [yes we had 2 connected rooms].  Even our daughters [WHO were best friends] over-extended their swimming time such that by the time we had to go for dinner, all the restaurants in the nearby mall were closing.  So, we had to drive out and scour through [WHICH was a blessing in disguise as well, we ended up literally in a 'JOY RIDE']

Our takeaway:  WHILE there is NO guarantee that STAYCATIONs will surely be as enjoyble as WHEN you go on a cross-continent holiday, everything boils down to spending things in a QUALITY, both the time, $$$$$$$ and most importantly, LIVING THE MOMENT, enjoying the PRESENT.  And of course you have to be CREATIVE enough.  As we only have 24 hours in a day, would you believe, in our most recent STAYCATION, everyone [including my 78-year old father-in-law] hit the sack past 1am come next day?  Never belittle STAYCATIONS dude because STAYCATIONS ARE NOT BAD AFTER ALL😡😡😡

Carpe Diem a.k.a. Plucking The Day

 

These days, there is that lost in translation WHEN it's about CARPE DIEM is wrongly equated to SEIZING THE DAY. Although this is all semantics, there is a world of difference because scholars advise that it really means PLUCKING THE DAY.  Breaking it down further down to our layman's level, it's likened to gathering of the ripening fruits OR flowers.  Further down, it means enjoying a moment that is deeply rooted in the sensory experience of nature.  And WHILE this is one of the telling ways, it reveals as well that process of our hidden assumptions about WHAT we really value.  Indeed, gathering flowers as a metaphor for timely enjoyment is a far gentler and more sensual image than the rather forceful and sometime even violent concept of seizing the moment.  We can keep tweaking CARPE DIEM but it's still a welcome metaphor💚💛💜

Regardless WHETHER we tweak CARPE DIEM either to the left OR right, we'll still find ourselves with the same questions LIKE  is your mind constantly racing?  Do you feel like you're always chasing after time OR wanting more and more?  YES, admittedly at times, I go through thoughts like all these BUT to arrest a potential skid, I am constantly working on finding that potential greater contentment and YES, that sometimes elusive calm.  And WHEN I feel unsettled, I would endeavor to take 1 to 2 minutes of my time to close my eyes.  And in that very brief pause, I do think about making the most of WHAT I have that very moment.  Call it 'plucking the day' OR whatever❎❎❎

Teddy Roosevelt, one of the more popular American Presidents was widely quoted "DO WHAT YOU CAN, WITH WHAT YOU HAVE, WHERE YOU ARE'.  This circles back to my thoughts before WHEN I wished I was born rich BUT after lots of soul-searching, I was [and still am] actually glad that I WASN'T born rich.  WHY?  Because those episodes in my life did teach me lessons I could have NOT learned elsewhere❌❌❌

Thing is, WHATEVER situation you are in now, there are a few essential things we need to consider even as we speak now:

• THAT happiness is a choice!
• THAT you DON'T need much to be happy
• THAT we be grateful for WHAT we have

Our takeaway:  Let's settle with this Mark Twain quote:  GIVE EVERY DAY THE CHANCE TO BECOME THE MOST BEAUTIFUL DAY OF YOUR LIFE.  I remember years back WHEN I got involved in a major car accident.  My constant reminder to myself WAS that I WAS grateful that that accident happened that very time WHEN I had all the time to spare and I had all the resources to tap.  In short, let's STOP thinking/saying LIKE  "IF I HAD THIS, I WOULD BE HAPPY". Enough of that crap dude😡😡😡

How's your EMOTIONAL TRIGGERS?

 

On any given day, you probably experience a range of emotions, name it, excitement, unease, frustration, joy,  disappointment.  Quite often, these often relate to specific events, such as talking specifics with a friend, meeting with your boss, or seeing and meeting the apple of your eyes?  NOT surprising, our human responses to these events can vary based on our frame of mind and the circumstances surrounding the situation.  YES, an emotional trigger is anything, include those experiences and memories. How's your EMOTIONAL TRIGGERS???

Health experts always tell us that EMOTIONAL TRIGGERS is a very key component of good EMOTIONAL health.  The harsh truth here is that EMOTIONAL TRIGGERS are indeed associated with post-traumatic stress disorder [PTSD].  The bigger picture of our life reflects a mile-long list of common situations that trigger intense emotions.  Rejection.  Betrayal.  Unjust treatment.  Challenged beliefs.  Helplessness.  Loss of control.  Being ignored.  Resistance to criticism.  Feeling unwanted.  Insecurity.  Even feeling smothered OR too needed!@#$%?

Back to the health experts, they counsel us to listen to our mind and body.  And a key step in learning to recognize your triggers involves paying attention WHEN situations generate a strong emotional response. BTW, it is an outlier if we will get into those EMOTIONAL pitfalls NOT until you yourself would experience those common manifestations like pounding heart, upset stomach, sweaty palms, name it💥💥💥

SO, WHAT NEXT?  We are always on the receiving end of this two-word advice: STEP BACK.  WHICH means, WHEN we detect OR start manifesting any of these, STEP BACK to take stock of things and consider WHAT just happened including the result OR response that it seemed to have activated.  Let's take a lift from movie-like settings like the wifey spent the whole day doing deep cleaning at home and even rearranging the living room.  WHEN hubby comes home, he is oblivious of everything and quickly settles on the sofa😕😕😕

Our takeaway:  I've seen it many times that we do STEP BACK after we OR someone has blown his/her top.  Problem is, they stop there instead of tracing the very root cause by following back and thinking back the situation that led you to feel WHAT you're currently feeling.  As the old cliche goes, IT TAKES 2 TO TANGO.  If we break that jinx, it may NOT have been such a gargantuan task, right?  So, HOW'S YOUR EMOTIONAL TRIGGERS❓❓❓