YES, We Lose Some, We Win Some!

WHO believes in winning streaks?  OR even in losing streaks?  I believe both, dude.  WHY?  Because in the past, I've been through the ringer, going through losing streaks and YES, there were times I was on a roll, and those were the times I felt I did reach the summit of Mount Everest after that scary and steep climb. YES, We Lose Some, We Win Some!  BUT you might wonder, WHY would we waste our time for this thread on something that is just too obvious?  Simple dude.  Some of us tend to feel they have been pushed to the edges after a string of endless loses.  WHEREAS some of us thought we can get intoxicated as part of the seemingly endless celebrations of our string and streak of wins📗📙📘

Surely you'll agree with me if I categorically state that life is an amazing journey that is completely and thoroughly unpredictable too.  It takes us through some of the most extraordinary moments and experiences as well as sad and distressing ones.  Just WHEN you feel relaxed and complacent, all hell may break loose WHEN calamities do strike and hit us hard.  Sometimes, you would discover things by serendipity and at times you DON'T seem to find things even though these are right before your eyes.  You save the best for last and still do NOT end up using them for yourself.  You often achieve WHEN you never thought was humanly possible for you and at times success thoroughly evades you in spite of putting in all your sweat, time and dedication just to give your 'BEST SHOT'💥💥💥

YES, life can be anything BUT unpredictable.  Does it NOT show the duality of our experiences in life?  The more we try reading between the lines OR try taming it OR making it conform to your wishes, the more it seems intractable and less amenable to any such maneuvers.  YES, life is all about the UPs and DOWNs just like a roller coaster ride.  One moment you are at the pinnacle, the very next moment takes you to the nadir.  WHAT is certain though is that there is a regular transition between the favorable and unfavorable times, good and bad experiences, just like the changing seasons.  It goes on to prove that nothing last forever❗❗❗

Here's the thing.  The BAD moments come to an end with the onset of GOOD ones and similarly, the GOOD ones come to an end by the onset of the BAD ones.  The moment you become arrogant OR start taking things for granted, just then life dashes all your hopes and crashes your flight midday.  And at that moment, you are forced to believe in the existence of some higher power that controls our life as well as our identity, that WHICH is omnipresent and all powerful.  That WHICH transcends any physical form OR shape and lends support to the theory that all events and happenings in this universe are governed at someplace else that is much beyond our own revelation💚💜💛

Our takeaway:  This is WHY we wonder if life is akin to playing a game of cards, NOT all hands are equally good and worth playing.  At times, you wind up much early in the game WHILE at others you are tempted to play till the end.  At times, you do exceedingly well by winning handsomely and at others you lose miserably.  YES dude, WE LOSE SOME, WE WIN SOME✅✅✅

Calmness In Chaos

Calmness In Chaos

The presence of CHAOS in our lives can really turn our world upside down.  And I admit I faced CHAOTIC situations many times in the past BUT through the years, I've learned to embrace it as an opportunity for growth and learning.  CHAOS can be defined as a state of disorder and/or massive confusion.  Even in Greek mythology, CHAOS was thought of as the origin of everything.  In short, we got to figure out that Calmness In Chaos📗📙📘

WHAT this means is that change OR growth could NOT occur before there was CHAOS.  Over to the scientists, CHAOS is thought of as an unpredictable surprise, WHAT might happen during natural disasters like floods, hurricanes and tsunamis.  Obviously, there are different degrees of CHAOS and sometimes there's NO time to prepare BUT having a 'go to' tool kit is helpful.  As per experts, CHAOS is the opposite of restoration OR healing.  WHEN in the midst of CHAOS, we imagine that things CAN'T get much worse and we might even think they'll never get better💧💧💧

I realize that once in a while, those encountering CHAOS can see the positive aspects of the experience.  I had a friend WHO went through a very difficult divorce BUT through that ordeal, he kept reminding himself that 'FROM ALL BAD COMES GOOD'.  YES, WHEN we're confronted with life challenges that might result in CHAOS, it is important that we employ coping devices that can help us navigate through them so we can move from the darkness into the light💥💥💥

With the holidays now in our calendars, it might be a good time for us to consider HOW we'll deal with the onslaught of CHAOTIC times often associated with this time of the year.  Establishing a sense of controlled CALM should be an important priority in our daily life.  Some ways to bring CALM into our life would include activities such as yoga, meditation, exercising, communing with nature OR reading.  Personally, meditation and writing are my personal anti-CHAOTIC activities💦💦💦

Our takeaway:  There are many mantras we can craft and even printing positive mantras like MAY I BE PEACEFUL AND AT EASE, MAY I BE FILLED WITH LOVINGKINDNESS, etc, the bottom-line is to digest all these positivities and translate it into concrete action.  We DON'T want to double-speak, spewing KINDNESS but unkind in our deeds.  We DON'T want to proclaim CALMNESS WHEN in fact, even the slightest snafu will trigger us end up in 'panic mode'.  Dude, let's start CONTROLLING what we can CONTROL😃😃😃

Until The Wheels Come Off

The consequences of a wheel loss incident can be that catastrophic and will always lead to follow up investigations.  BUT Until The Wheels Come Off, it is NEVER time to panic in life.  In fact, NOT even WHEN the WHEELS COME OFF.  Before moving fast with our narrative, point here is that, while the sun is shining and dandy, let us reap all the benefits and fruits that would abound during those times.  We DON'T want to miss it📗📙📘

HOW time flies.  During our years in school, we [wrongly] thought that time fleets by as slow as the snail moves.  It's true we keep harping [till now] that we got to enjoy the MOMENT but hey dude, sometimes, our fault is that we tend to enjoy the MOMENT way too long, way too far, after that previous MOMENT is gone.  Sounds familiar?  WHEN we thought those WHEELS will never come off?  Remember even the most tightened bolts will suffer the brunt of its wear and tear💥💥💥

As we transition into the job market, many times we tend to end up into that same conundrum as we end up hopping from one stint to another.  A few years ago, I was coaching someone [to prepare him for a job interview] and WHEN I asked him a typical low-hanging question like HOW DO YOU SPEND YOUR TIME?  I almost fell off my chair WHEN he responded:  'SLEEPING'!@#$%?  Oops I told myself, has today's generation gone deep south this far, this bad???

Moving fast forward to realistic scenarios WHEN indeed the WHEELS COME OFF, the question is, HOW ready are we to cope and handle such unexpected twists in our life journey?  Sadly, from my tower WHERE I'm perched from atop, I'm saddened to witness [first hand] many of our Gen Z's NOT that ready, NOT that ripened to handle unexpected situation like WHEN THE WHEELS COME OFF in their own lives💧💧💧

Our takeaway:  As we have a light-years ahead for a head-start, there is NOT an iota of reason to exculpate us from an eventual guilt WHEN we are unable to handle things WHEN THE WHEELS COME OFF.  WHEN should we be readying up?  Only after we get bruised and scathed?  NOT the way to go dude as we have more than enough light-years to ready up ourselves WHEN THE WHEELS COME OFF😌😌😌

When Does TRANSFORMATION Kick-in?

 

All along, TRANSFORMATION has always been [wrongly] thought as the buzzword ONLY either in business OR at the workplace.  NO sirrrrrrrrrrrs.  It is as relevant as well in our daily life because we CAN'T compartmentalize life itself and bury it deep in each different silo.  To simplify this misconception about TRANSFORMATION, it can be spelled into C-H-A-N-G-E because, to piggy-back on an age-old cliche, CHANGE is the only permanent thing!!!

In the shortest words, everyone of us need to TRANSFORM [likely NOT just once OR twice in our life] BUT the bigger ASK is:  HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE TO TRANSFORM someone?  YES, that is a question that does spark a thousand thoughts.  Again, WHAT's quite seem to be daunting here is that TRANSFORMATION sounds something grandiose OR complex BUT IT'S NOT.  There are those small, tiny-whiny TRANSFORMATIONS that can take considerably less time than we [wrongly perceive]❎❎❎

BUT to set expectations, "EPIC TRANSFORMATIONS" really take more time.  Through the years, I did bear witness on first hand quite a zillion TRANSFORMATIONS that got initiated.  Simply put, there are two scenarios that trigger such and a big chunk of it is triggered OUT OF NECESSITY.  Practical and real life examples are inefficient processes, bungled processings, a process flaw OR error causing a process to bog down.  In our personal life, TRANSFORMATIONS arising out of need may be triggered by very common scenarios such as:

• A problem arises and TRANSFORMATION is the best option
• A situation is acceptable BUT it needs to be improved 
• A mindset that embodies proactiveness for TRANSFORMATION
• A TRANSFORMATION is mandated by the organization

If someone will pick my brain, I would NOT opt for the last trigger [as listed above] because taking action for compliance purposes DOESN'T sound good at all.  WHY initiate TRANSFORMATION simply because it is required?  WHY get into that TRANSFORMATION only because you are forced to?  A huge miss here is the need for us humans to initiate our own TRANSFORMATION anytime in life WHERE we need to change for the better💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  In the simplest terms, we have simplified TRANSFORMATION to instead call it as CONTINUOUS IMPROVEMENT.  WHICH meant that regardless if there are hiccups OR none at all, it makes sense to get this best practice embedded within ourselves because we CAN'T and SHOULDN'T be complacent with WHAT or WHO we are because there will always be rooms for improvement.  Can we have that TRANSFORMATION mindset embedded in our life, dude😃😃😃

Turning The Page[After The Dust Settles]

 

Sometimes life is all smooth sailing and other times, it can feel like we're navigating through thick mud.  During difficult times we might wonder, HOW DID WE END UP HERE?  WHY DOES IT ALL FEEL SO HARD?  WILL I EVER GET THAT BREAK?  Oh Oh, WHEN we end up in stuck places, it is indeed that challenging to know HOW to get back to calm waters.  It's hard to see HOW we will regain our sense that all is well📘📙📗

Indeed, our life's challenges feel hard and draining enough and in the end, we can feel stuck especially with no end in sight at all.  Getting to that other side in our personal life, professional life OR our overall sense of joy in life can somehow feel out of reach.  YES YES yow, I do get it, I've been there more than once in my life.  Catching that 'lucky break' can feel like a roller coaster of a waiting game.  Sort of waiting for something external to shift before we experience relief, and that only amplifies WHEN we're feeling stuck and worse, somewhat disempowered💥💥💥

Over time, after so many times of turbulence up and out there, I've learned if I still feel stuck in the mud after putting in my best [ever] efforts, it's a sign to turn the page and start fresh.  TURNING THE PAGE can be helpful with big obstacles in life and it can also bring relief to the small day to day jams we get caught up in.  Simply put, TURNING THE PAGE is surrendering to WHAT is hard.  Kind of saying "I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH THIS STORM I'M IN, SO I'M GOING TO TURN THE PAGE AND START FRESH✅✅✅

WHEN we have stayed and struggled in those agonies long enough, it is about saying ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.  THAT 'I can't change WHAT IS but I can see life before me with that new perspective.  THAT I can bring a new chapter, one that ISN'T bogged down by my current frame of reality.  SO HOW???

• START WITH WHERE YOU ARE - WHEN we feel stuck, starting with WHERE we are might seem like a lost cause because after all, we're stuck!  BUT starting with WHERE we are is really about presence and gratitude.  We can shelf the story about our current circumstances and instead bring to mind all the things we are grateful for.  TURNING THE PAGE ISN'T about ignoring OR denying truths BUT it's about choosing to NOT become swallowed by them❌❌❌
  

• SELF-REFLECTION - Our perception of our 'outer world' is a reflection of our inner world.  And WHEN we make a habit of checking in with ourselves on a daily basis, we can become familiar with that tapestry of our inner world.  Then, WHEN we feel like we are being swallowed by challenges in our external world, we can venture inward and see WHAT we might need shifting.  Our takeaway:  Our perspective creates our experience in life and our choice to adjust our perspective is our source of power.  And WHEN we witness our ability to shift perspective and TURN THE PAGE, we can build more faith in ourself.  TURNING THE PAGE should NOT be a tough call to make, dude😊😊😊

Is It That Hard To Follow Our Passion?

Is It That Hard To Follow Our Passion?

How many times have we been hearing 'FOLLOW YOUR PASSION'?  How many times we heard guest speakers say that in their graduation speeches?  And WHEN we plunge into the job market, how often do we come across that spiel in job ads?  Oh YES, we even say that to our own selves [silently most of the time though].  Even in all surveys, 90% of respondents listed 'PURSUING PASSION' as an important goal for their future.  BUT hold on, would you agree with me that many of us fail [sometimes] miserably to FOLLOW OUR PASSION.  Really?  Is It That Hard To Follow Our Passion

BUT here's a follow-through to those recent surveys.  Out of the 90% respondents WHO admitted FOLLOWING THEIR PASSION as being at the top of the totem pole, only a paltry 20% admitted that they are truly PASSIONATE.  And WHEN that result was dissected, it showed that many, if NOT most, of us DON'T know how to pursue our passion and thus we fail to do so.  How do we fix that kind of conundrum?  That's the question I got fixated for quite sometime back📌📌📌

Research on PASSION suggests that we need to understand that PASSION is NOT something one finds BUT rather, it is something to be developed.  And without leveraging on hyperbole, PASSION is something we need to embrace with NO preconditions, NO IFs, NO BUTs.  Once we do have this unconditional commitment to our own PASSION, we got to be wary that in our everyday life, it is challenging to pursue our PASSION for a big chunk of our lives💦💦💦

Oh YES, a common crack we often stumble is that common misperception we have about PASSION being a FIXED one.  You either have PASSION for something OR you DON'T.  The problem with that belief is that it is limiting, leading us to think of PASSION as something we discover OR happen upon.  As a result, we may try many different jobs looking for the 'right fit', the role that instantly flips the PASSION switch, and we may NOT take into account the fact that it often takes time to develop one's PASSION, whatever it may be❎❎❎

Our takeaway:  Allow me to share how I tackled this PASSION thing in the past.  I challenged my previous [wrong] assumption that PASSION has to be discovered.  Instead, I realized that PASSION has to be developed.  It is NEVER an overnight thing, NEVER a genie straight from the bottle.  So, IS IT HARD TO FOLLOW OUR PASSION???

Silent Walking, Anyone?

 

With the proliferation of smart gadgets and the endless creeping of technology into our lives, we CAN'T be blamed if we're constantly hogtied to technology itself.  First off, obviously in school or at work, we're wired and off hours, either going to the gym OR for a walk, HOW often do we see people SILENTLY WALKING devoid of any gadgets, ear pods OR ear phones?  Very really, if at all.  Blame it on Apple OR Samsung for even peddling the 'health buff' functionalities of their gadgets so that every metrics from steps to heartbeat etc are tracked📗📙📘

And WHILE I am NOT an expert in health OR fitness, it's kind of concerning WHEN, in the course of my walks, I would stumble across people with audio obviously enabled during their walks.  BUT for obvious reasons, as per this poster, it's NOT the best way to go.  Moreover, experts all sing in unison that SILENT WALKING, at its core, it is about "CLEARING ONE'S MIND" and going for a walk alone, free of distractions💥💥💥

In simple, layman's terms, we are egged to go for SILENT WALKING as it is one of the easy ways to disconnect ourselves from all the noise and chaos that is already part of our busy world.  Simply put, it is even the excellent way to connect to our "core selves".  And by removing distractions during that SILENT WALKING, it will enable us to become more aware of our inner and outer environment, and that includes NOT just hearing the chirping of the birds BUT appreciating it💚💛💜

Recent studies show results that rates of anxiety and depression have risen dramatically since the beginning of that recent Covid-19 Pandemic and increasing numbers are, in fact, seeking natural, integrative approaches to improve their mental health.  SO, probably, the $64 question is:  HOW do we do SILENT WALKING?  NOT to reinvent the wheel, experts advise us to walk in nearby, quite areas, hopefully somewhere in nature OR outdoors and it's also best to pick a time WHEN you know there will be minimal people OR activity around that area to distract you❎❎❎

Our takeaway:  To share my insights every since I embraced focused WALKING since January 2nd of 2024, I take preemptive measures like taking care of my bodily needs such as thirst OR hunger beforehand so that they DON'T become distractions.  And during those SILENT WALKS, I would focus on my thoughts, my feelings, my mind, then breathing and appreciating with gratitude WHEN the sun kisses my skin, turning those moments as the best times for my self-reflections.  For those living in the middle of highly urbanized areas, you can still engage in SILENT WALKING as the environment NEED NOT necessarily be silent BUT it's you WHO should be.  SILENT WALKING will lead you to more intangibles than tangible benefits BUT it sums up to a WIN-WIN proposition for you.  Try SILENT WALKING dude😍😍😍

See Through The Lens: KNOW YOUR STRENGTHS

See Through The Lens:  KNOW YOUR STRENGTHS

See Through The Lens:  KNOW YOUR STRENGTHS.  When I was still in school, I barely thought about OR talked about my STRENGTHS.  WHILE I vaguely knew I was good at certain things, I avoided exploring and articulating my strengths.  I then feared that I might sound like I was bragging OR somehow implying that I was better than others if I did.  Sadly, I let that fear get the best of me for the longest time.  It WASN'T until long after I had graduated from university that I learned that the ability to name, claim and aim your STRENGTHS is an essential skill to thrive in today's workforce.  You might ask me, could I have avoided committing those mistakes?  Certainly dude📗📙📘

For so many reasons, it is beneficial for us to be focusing on our own STRENGTHS now, rather than later.  First and foremost, knowing your STRENGTHS will help you identify opportunities that would be a good fit for you.  One of the best ways to determine the next steps in our life journey is to first understand WHO you are, WHICH then includes reflecting on your STRENGTHS.  The better you know your natural talents, the more you can draw from them to search for and identify opportunities that will give you the chance to do WHAT you do best everyday, so you can then turn your raw talents into matured STRENGTHS and live up to your potential💧💧💧

Over to the job market, learning HOW to showcase your STRENGTHS in a resume, cover letter or interview, you can demonstrate your value to recruiters and show them NOT only your fitness BUT your readiness to tackle on that job opportunity you're angling😗😗😗

Let's look at this WHAT IF.  WHAT IF you tend to be underrating yourself?  Psychologists covered this in their research and results show that this gives rise to two common distortions in one's behavior.  THAT's overdoing and underdoing.  In the past, I came across an executive WHO was worried he lacked authority [even though he was a naturally commanding person].  So, he poured it on and was perceived by his team members as one WHO seemed overpowering❌❌❌

Our takeaway:  Let us be aware and wary that there is a very thin demarcation line where we end up understating OR overstating our STRENGTHS.  Once you underrate yourself in a given aspect, you are likely creating a void caused by that underrating.  WHEREAS if you overdo things beyond your validated STRENGTH, you may likely flop.  SO HOW?  Be 'SPOT ON' to know your STRENGTHs❗❗❗

That GIGO Effect!

That GIGO Effect!

GARBAGE IN GARBAGE OUT.  This phrase originated in the computer world.  I remember sometime back, together with my DB Team, we spent sleepless nights [that's besides the long days] cleansing data WHICH were 'garbage' [and by the time we confirmed it was GARBAGE, it was too little too late].  All along in the technology space, when we kept harping on GARBAGE IN GARBAGE OUT, it was about That GIGO Effect📗📙📘

Swinging over to the fast lane, to our daily lives, are we witnessing GARBAGE IN GARBAGE OUT?  Those instances could be cranking up to zillion times I guess.  Starting from our school days, it's so obvious WHY our parents wanted all along to send us to the good and possibly best schools [of course, to schools their war chest can align.  Not schools in the Ivy League for most of us].  And WHY did our parents frown when sometimes we're friends to people NOT much to their liking💥💥💥

As we get into the groove towards adulthood, WHEN we have unshackled ourselves away from our parents, WHEN we're very much on our own, we would then realize the relevance of that very old but heavily quoted one-liner:  BIRDS OF THE SAME FEATHER FLOCK TOGETHER.  Before you know it, if you're a huge fun of clubbing, WHO else will you spend time with?  And if you're a smoker, do you expect to spend time with a bookworm😄😄😄

As you gradually build your habits and persona, before you know it, you would realize that YOU ARE WHAT YOU ARE, that WHATEVER you embraced would end up as a huge influence in your evolving persona, that your developing discipline is now becoming WHAT is you at the moment.  You might ask, can I undo things so that I DON'T end up with GARBAGE IN GARBAGE OUT???

Our takeaway:  In life, we can likely avoid seeing OR having garbage as an output in our life.  BUT as the Singaporean would ask, SO HOW?  It all starts up front when data is being collected and before it gets churned out.  GO BACK TO BASICs.  Trace those 'bad stuff'  WHERE it is emanating, WHAT's causing OR triggering it.  And rectify that 'bad stuff' ASAP.  Avoid blurting excuses and alibis because by then, it might be TOO LITTLE TOO LATE❗❗❗

Control LESS, Move Forward MORE!

Control LESS, Move Forward MORE!

Has anyone been into that situation WHEREIN anything you touch seems to crumble?  YES, donkey years ago, I had given it my all, name it, late nights, relentless planning, endless cups of coffee.  YET, the more I tried to control myself during those times, the more I felt stalled and stagnant.  Control LESS, Move Forward MORE!  True, many of us [and that includes me sometime in the distant past] are OR were CONTROL FREAKS.  BUT NOT to defend the guilty, feeling the need to be in CONTROL is natural.  It is WHEN we try to CONTROL everything that we create unnecessary stress and anxiety that can hold us back.  It's important to realize that we can never control everything.  Trying to do that would lead us to many negative emotions WHEN things DON'T go exactly HOW we try to force them📘📙📗

BUT let's admit it, letting go of CONTROL ISN'T always that easy.  In fact, it's damn tough especially when we face uncertainties in life.  BUT let's get to the bottom of things, that letting go of CONTROL can actually help bring a greater sense of peace.  Add on to that, releasing the things you truly CAN'T CONTROL can give you more time and energy to focus on the things that you can.  My analogy here is in the corporate world.  WHY did BPO services sprout?  It's because companies want to focus and CONTROL operations of their core business💥💥💥

So, this question still bothers me.  WHY do we need the feel to CONTROL?  Thing is, the desire to be able to CONTROL our surroundings and circumstances is ingrained into our consciousness.  This is because the more we know about our world, the safer we feel.  On the other hand, the less we know, the more scared we feel.  The need to CONTROL is directly rooted in fear, specifically that FEAR of WHAT might happen outside our CONTROL.  Digging up for the possible root causes of this CONTROL freakiness, anxiety and past trauma are common causes.  People WHO experience anxiety often have a very difficult time tolerating uncertainty.  They may worry more about future events and ruminate over situations they cannot CONTROL💦💦💦

Psychologists even advise us that sheer attempts to CONTROL does negatively, affect our lives.  It may be natural to want to CONTROL things BUT that DOESN'T make it healthy.  In fact, their studies show that there are many ways in which trying to CONTROL everything could, in the end, backfire in the long run.  Their studies showed that people WHO try to CONTROL everything may even experience more stress and anxiety than those WHO DON'T.  People tend to feel more upset WHEN they feel like they cannot CONTROL the sources of stress in their life.  However, it is the perception of CONTROL that has a major effect on HOW people respond to aversive situations.  That becomes the acid test we need to hurdle😊😊😊

Our takeaway:  Let's put things this way.  Many times in our life, we end up dissatisfied because of our feeling for that need to CONTROL and NOT having it, we end up dissatisfied.  Perceived CONTROL can play an important role in overall happiness.  People WHO have high levels of perceived CONTROL can play an important role  in one's overall happiness.  Because there is NO way to CONTROL everything in life, caring too much about HOW things outside your CONTROL are going can lead to increased criticism about everything that happens.  After all, WHEN you DON'T CONTROL the outcomes you want to, it makes sense that you DON'T like them.  In turn, being more critical can make us more neurotic, leading us to that unending and spiraling cycle in WHICH we get progressively unhappier with our lives.  Can we CONTROL LESS, and MOVE FORWARD MORE❗❗❗