Perception Plays, Perception Matters

Perception Plays, Perception Matters

Across our lives, things happen for a reason and the results will lead to consequences and ramifications.  But this is not all about CAUSE and EFFECT.  Beyond it, Perception Plays, Perception Matters.  You could have outputted 9 but your boss takes it as 6.  And that half-truth may not be true at all but who cares, because when Perception Plays, Perception Matters.

Hey, you could see that glass as half-full but your customer tells you that it is half-empty.  And when there is a gap, a disconnect between two parties, only God knows what happens next.  So, where's the beef ?  You, we gotta ensure that perception is always aligned to the 'TRUE FACT'.  Anything that is a half-truth means it's NOT TRUE.  You could be a student in school, a worker in office, a business partner or a lifetime partner to your spouse.  The common denominator is for us to ensure that PERCEPTION = FACT.

BTW, you might wonder, where is PERCEPTION ARCHIVED ? Oh, perception is archived across any of our senses.  And when that perception is stored, erasing or correcting that perception will take at least twice the effort had we decided to endeavoring that that wrong perception should not happen in the first place.  As the old cliche goes, PREVENTION IS BETTER THAN CURING.  If we were students, I'll take an earnest effort that I be perceived by my professor as a serious student.  If I were a worker, I want that I am perceived by my boss that I am a focused worker with a sense of accountability.  If I have a business, I want to be perceived as customer-centric no less.

Who does not want to be perceived either as a conscientious student, a faithful spouse, a responsible worker or a customer-centric businessman ?  So, I hope we're all on the same page with regard perception but ooops that's only half of the story.  The other half of the story means we need to stand out for what we want to be perceived.  We need to walk the talk no less.

Bottom-line is this equation:  PERCEPTION = REALITY and no less than that.  While we keep preaching that we need to take efforts so that the perception about us remains good and positive enough, it takes 'TWO to TANGO'.  PERCEPTION will come into play if it is aligned with REALITY.  We can't allow gaps or disconnects please✅✅✅

Any Meat Left on the Bone ?

 Any Meat Left on the Bone ?

Oh yes, have we noticed sometimes with bones scattered all over the place ?  But the nagging question I always asked myself is why sometimes, I do see MEAT LEFT ON THE BONE.  And this happens very much in our real lives as well.  The biggest chunk of our strengths are deeply embedded within our bones, so let's ask if ANY MEAT is LEFT ON THE BONE yet.

BTW, all our resources in life are finite.  Even that water dripping from the faucet will eventually dry up.  What's regrettable, though, is that there are points in our life when we feel there is no MEAT LEFT on the BONE.  How many challenges did we face in our lifetime and how often did we ever give up too soon ?  Indeed that's regrettable because more often we were unable to ascertain that there was meat, scanty it may be, left on the bone because we could have gone farther.

One particular resource we often feel we've gone kaput is TIME. Often, we thought we ran out of time, thinking that the next thing we needed to do was to give up on what we were embarking, abandoning something which we started or just shunning off from the priorities we earlier set forth.  And indeed it is a HUGE WASTE if we [wrongly] thought that it's GAME OVER simply because you [wrongly] thought you RAN OUT of TIME.  But let's relook back if indeed we made the pinpoint assessment that we judiciously utilized every tick of the clock, with ZERO WASTAGE, if at all ?

Not to sugar-coat, all along, the meat I've been referring to are the tons of time we did not utilize optimally or worst, those fractions of time we have utterly wasted.  If we can go by the playbook in the basic management of time, there is a high likelihood that we will not end up with MEAT LEFT ON THE BONE scenarios.  This poster says it all:  WASTED TIME IS WORSE THAN WASTED MONEY.

At the end of the day, life is all balancing act.  No one size fits all.  You yourself will need to figure out how to optimally utilize your resources [and most especially TIME] so that you won't be questioned for throwing bones with meat therein.  The worst thing in life we would want to hear from you is that "I DON'T HAVE TIME" because that's the worst lame excuse we deserve to give❗❗❗

That Habit of Landing 'ON YOUR FEET'

That Habit of Landing 'ON YOUR FEET'

This is a given.  Not all the time are we expected to be just walking on the ground as in life, from time to time, we have to take risks.  On the other hand, we can't blame many of us who remain steadfast in refusing to take risks simply because they are not sure if once they jump to aim for that goal, will they be LANDING ON THEIR FEET back on the ground.  It's like a damn if you, damn if you don't.

Indeed, it is scary and quite intimidating if we paint scenarios that once we fail after taking a risk, we will FALL FLAT or worse, end up badly bruised, at least mentally and psychologically, if not mentally.  But as there are always no guarantees that you won't fall flat once you fail, it makes sense to be guided how can we take risks.

Not to sound killjoy, it pays we GATHER COURAGE when take the LEAPS of FAITH.    #1 DON'T UNDERESTIMATE YOURSELF.            #2 CAREFULLY ASSESS THE RISKS v BENEFITS #3 DECIDE BY YOURSELF TO TAKE RISKS       #4 BE REALISTIC, WHAT CAN WRONG AT ALL #5 LET GO OF WHAT OTHERS THINK, THAT'S IT #6 BE REALISTICALLY POSITIVE, NO MORE THAN what is realistic and feasible because you need to be honest and fair to yourself.

What else do we need ?  It is that BALANCING ACT, weighing the Pros and Cons, comparing the possible benefits [if you achieve it] versus the extent of risks you need to take.  You may want to bag a lucrative job earning $$$ but what are your chances ?  What happens if you fail? Ensure that when you fall back on the ground, you still LAND ON YOUR FEET.
 

Lest be optimistically misplaced, it pays that you always readied yourself with either a parachute or a life-saver when things end up in our failure.  Regardless, it pays that we develop that habit of always LANDING ON OUR FEET those times when we slip, when we fail❗❗❗

Hey, the Grass Keeps Growing Under Your Feet

Hey, the Grass Keeps Growing Under Our Feet

Hey, don't we realize it ?  That the GRASS KEEPS GROWING UNDER OUR FEET ?  Oh. does it matter ? Yesireeee it does matter and it matters a lot.  We don't need to look far.  Just stoop down to the grass knoll and you'll see that indeed, grass grows with no need of intervention and by the time  it grows and gathers like the wild bushes, how easy is it to traverse across the grounds ?  While we can't stop the grass to grow, at the very least, we gotta MAKE OUR MOVES, fast enough. 

Oh well, unless you belong to the tribal nomads out there in the deserts of the Arabian Peninsula, to us all, when the grass grows thick enough underneath our feet, it means, hardly has moved, hardly has changed.  In short, hardly would there be traces of real-life activities within that stretch.  In life, opportunities would spring out at various points to our surprise and after getting overwhelmed with it, what happens next ?  It takes eternity for us to make our move[s].  Besides being initially excited and ecstatic, once those feelings are gone, everything seems to die down as well.  But hey, we can't really prevent GRASS FROM GROWING UNDER OUR FEET.

Oh no, please no.  We can't be TURTLES.  See how far have these turtles traversed?  Obviously, not all decisions in life are that simple.  Would you enter into another relationship just after a breakup ?  Will you grab a job offer when you're happy in your current role ?  Will you risk your business by aggressively expanding because it seems that enticing ?

In the end, we tend to be like the girls who would like to feel the freshness of every morning by smelling the flowers and enjoying the scenery.  But hey, before you know it, it's scorching hot because it is almost 12 noon.  Sounds familiar ?  Dilly-dallying.  Analyzing and analyzing until you end up with analysis paralysis, whew ! Indeed for complex decisions, they weigh heavily because they can impact your life in many ways.

Our real problem [unknown to most of us] is that we have that tendency to think a certain way without even realizing it.  Let's have clear and concrete examples.  During this pandemic, your home internet seems to be damn slow more often YET till now, have you decided to switch internet provider ?  So how do we handle this ?  IDENTIFY YOUR PROBLEM or NEED then weigh your options.  Depending how you value it, that gets tied to your emotions and instincts but hey, the way to go is to look at things RATIONALLY.  Let us NOT ALLOW THE GRASS TO KEEP GROWING UNDER OUR FEET, dude✅✅✅

Don't Break Your Neck

Don't Break Your Neck

How often DO YOU BREAK YOUR NECK ? In our life, once you go over the huge expanse of the ocean, shark-infested waters are all over the place.  Having said this, we [including myself in the past] were always very vocal that we should be fearless when taking risks in life.  Born with a primal urge to test ourselves, wave our limbs around to see what they can do, peer over the ledge to the great wide beyond.  

Imagine where humans would have stalled out where we not naturally inclined to risk; if not for that first idiot baby who decided to stand up on two legs, we'd be scaly-bellied slug people still slithering safely along the ground.  Indeed, a life without risk is a strange thing to contemplate, in part because the risk-taker is such a culturally romantic figure.  it is this duality that makes risk so compelling and so necessary as risks can be a coiling on ourselves as much as it is a reaching out as we get to know ourselves AS LONG AS WE DON'T BREAK OUR NECK.  

Risk-taking is understood as an experience we value because of the positive experience of seeking a challenge and successfully mastering the challenge.  In contrast, risk taking as a means to an end is driven by a particular purpose.  The purpose can vary quite a bit and might be complex, reaching from aiming for material gain to developing a valued identity.  

At the end of the day, the recurring question staring in our face is how far and how often should we be taking risks in life ?  Hmmmm, a good decision comes from knowing yourself well.  When you KNOW YOUR LIMITS, then you DON'T NEED TO BREAK YOUR NECK. Sometimes, it's good to take a risk when it pushes you outside of your comfort zone and helps you achieve a healthy goal.  At other times, taking risks can have serious negative consequences on our health, on our relationships or even our business.  

Not to stomp our foot down for us to take risks, risks are fine per se but please put a cap to it.  KNOW YOUR LIMITS.  If the risk is too high and the probability of success is next to impossible, WHY BREAK YOUR NECK ?  The end does not justify the means but if you will make an override to this rule, better be cocksure that you won't BREAK YOUR NECK regardless of the plum down the road✅✅✅

Why Excuses Happen

 Why Excuses Happen

Apologies, I don't have the intention to strain your eyes with this tree of countless branches of EXCUSES but this is it in real life.  If need to rattle off all the possible EXCUSES we can cling to, it will be kilometric-long, one too many.  So, the question is, do EXCUSES deserve to be discussed, if at all ?  Absolutely please we have to.  Why ?  It's because EXCUSES are part of our real life but the way EXCUSES are stretched beyond what is reasonable, this deserves our time now to dissect as to how we can handle these EXCUSES dilemma which is dragging many of us down. Isn't it high time for us to have a realization on this ?

Let's figure out why we do make an excuse.  Write it down.  Part of what allows us to make so many EXCUSES is that we don't always realize how much we use them.  Think about your day and note five common reasons you didn't complete a task or reach a goal. When you do it, you might notice something like you can't work out today because you only had an hour, you didn't go grocery shopping because you didn't feel like it or you couldn't go grocery because you didn't feel like it or you couldn't clean your house yesterday because your sibling needed help with her homework.

We can probably identify our own specific types of EXCUSES after doing something similar for yourself.  By cutting down on common EXCUSES [like - I'm too busy, I don't have enough money, I deserve a break], we give ourselves permission to get things done.  

By setting new boundaries [like- I'll work out at 6pm, I get paid tomorrow, then I am allowed to go buy groceries, etc], we demonstrate our commitment to being successful.  Sometimes, all it takes is recognizing that, instead of being TOO TIRED to exercise, maybe you are just not in a hurry right now.  Recognizing these patterns in your behavior helps cut through the confusion and allows you to refocus your energy on getting things done right away.  In short, to stop making excuses take action, TAKE ACTION and it doesn't matter how small the action is.  

When you take that first brave step, that will help you to stop making excuses.  SMALL ACTION steps on a daily basis are an effective way to eliminate those excuses.  What else ?  SET GOALS.  Taking action is a gradual process.  In order to get rid of the vicious cycle of making excuses, set SMALL GOALS.  These goals will act like benchmarks that will give you the necessary push and motivation to keep going.  SMALL STEPS and SMALL REWARDS will add up to great results.  Even if the results are too small to be visible right now, your results will be visible over time.  Trust me❗❗❗

Is CONFIDENCE a HARD SELL ?

Is CONFIDENCE a HARD SELL ?

Is CONFIDENCE a HARD SELL ? Yesireee me thinks.  Over the years, I've met people up close enough to have a first-hand assessment of them.  Surprisingly, most of them are gifted, skilled, talented and just capable of etching one's name within his/her lifetime.  But to date, I would say less than ten percent of them really made it in life.

So what gives ?  Blame it on our preoccupation with what others think of us.  If before every move, we look around to find out who's lurking and seemingly watching us.  Then our woes begin at that point. What can we do ?                                                    #1 REPROGRAM YOURSELF.  Believe MORE in yourself.          #2 SET A GOAL.  Then see how confidence skyrockets.            #3 GET FIT. Feel good & you'll have less 'downtime'.                #4 PRACTICE GRATITUDE. Your confidence level rises            #5 STAND UP STRAIGHT. Power Pose increases confidence     #6 GET OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE. Self-jailing is a NO!  

 #7 EMBRACE SPONTANEITY. Don't limit our life on daily routine.  When we force ourselves to be spontaneous, we stretch ourselves.  We allow ourselves to be open to potential discomfort and the uncertainty of the unknown.  

Oh, it's fine to be looking at our shadows but make sure that your shadow includes that cape of superman and wonder woman. We need to build and nurture that aura coming from the cape to exude more confidence.  Think of that feeling of being above the rest, that of being atop the cream of the crop ?  Whereas without the cape, you may perceive yourself as less capable of everyone else and just unable to take the next step forward.

Semantics also mean a lot.  If 'i WISH' is your fav, trust me, you'll go as far as the wishing well, wishing and no more than that.  But once you translate that to 'I WILL', you bet, you will bear witness to an uptick in your confidence.  If only to accentuate the power of words, they really matter because while WISH makes you DREAM, WILL makes you ACT.  And BTW, CONFIDENCE-building does not need any $$$ to be dipped from your pocket.  You just gotta dip from deep within you but you gotta embrace with open arms for you to boost your CONFIDENCE.  If you resist boosting your confidence, WHAT TO DO ?

Now, for the math equation, our COFIDENCE FORMULA=[KNOW-HOW + REPETITIONS] x AWARENESS of IMPROVEMENT.  Note that your knowledge and skills are the basic ingredients to build up confidence but to improve it, you got to go to REPETITIONS over and over again.  All these are NON-NEGOTIABLES so that CONFIDENCE does not become a HARD-SELL✅✅✅

Don't Use a Lot Where a Little Will Do

Don't Use a Lot Where a Little Will Do

Oh I love this one-liner from Tiny Budhha:  Don't Use a Lot Where a Little Will Do.  Oh, does this matter a discussion?  Let's look around us, what's going on ?  A lot of time is spent mulling tons of hours through school academic projects.  And at work, what's the total turnaround/elapsed time to prepare a report ?  In business, how much effort was exerted to plan, plan and plan but when it's in full-blown operations, the owner is running his business in 'virtual' mode when in fact his presence is needed on site, up front.  And how about our relationships ?  How much time and effort [+ stress] are all spent to fix a strained relationship when in fact, all it would have taken will be for at least one of the two protagonists to just swallow up his pride and take a step to reach out in all humility.  Doesn't all these warrant us to really take stock of things and re-examine back to the drawing board ?
 

Guess what is the most precious resource we should be prudent and mindful ?  Yesir it's TIME.  Think about it and you don't have to look back a decade ago.  Just look back the past year we're all locked in this pandemic.  Let's ask ourselves, if the pandemic paralysis which started in March 2021 will restart all over again now, how will you spend the next eighteen months ? 

Oh I love this poster which says:  WASTE YOUR MONEY AND YOU HAVE ONLY WASTER MONEY.  WASTE YOUR TIME AND YOU HAVE LOST PART OF YOUR LIFE.  This is a mouthful even as it really hits the nail right on its head.  Whether it is in our relationships, in school, at work or in business, once you spend a lot more time WHERE A LITTLE WILL DO, there's just no way to recoup lost time.  Time spent is time gone and if such time was not spent judiciously, that chunk of time simply simply went down the drain, period.  Can you still recover ?  Yes you can attempt to recover but that chunk of time is gone.

Now, let me face the mirror and ask myself, how's my TIME MANAGEMENT ?  Surely it is never perfect because there were days in the past [like weekends] when you just wanted to rise up late after a whole week of work but if we focus on the weekdays, I can beat my chest then.  I am just time-focused from the time I set my alarm clock till I call it a day the next day.  I remember my boss at HSBC Singapore harping:  IF YOU DON'T HAVE TIME, MAKE TIME.

Now here comes technology.  Do we realize why mail apps became that intelligent to tag those junk and spam mails ?  Plain and simple, it was meant for us NOT to waste our time on those junk and spam mails.  Again, it all boils down to TIME MANAGEMENT.  Moving forward, can we commit to ourselves that from this day onwards, you will utilize your time judiciously so that you DON'T USE A LOT WHERE A LITTLE WILL DO !  Can ❓❓❓

Try to Color Outside the Line

Try to Color Outside the Line

Ever thought to COLOR OUTSIDE THE LINE?  I guess majority of us won't even ponder to think about it.  I admit, I myself in the past, I was too technical and theoretical such that everything I did was confined within the boundaries, within the lines.  In the short-term, I didn't see anything wrong with me just COLORING WITHIN THE LINE.  i had the mindset of "why fix if it ain't broke". But again, everything was short-term.  But when I started hitting the wall, I came into this realization that I should TRY TO COLOR OUTSIDE THE LINE.  

But before figuring out HOW to color outside the line, we should challenge ourselves, WHY do we need to COLOR OUTSIDE THE LINE ?  

Question the STATUS QUO.  Imagine if everyone of us accepted things as they are?  There would be NO improvements or innovations then. And if we do view things as unchangeable, nothing will change for the better.  By thinking OUTSIDE THE BOX and questioning the STATUS QUO, this will allow you to KEEP GROWING and improving. 

Exactly, to COLOR OUTSIDE THE LINE is much akin to THINKING OUTSIDE THE BOX. Indeed, being inside the box causes things to be so constrained, such that the only option left is to really get out of the box and if you're into plans and actions, that means THINKING OUTSIDE THE BOX because that gives us the edge over everyone else because that highlights our role as a problem solver.  

Quite drastic measures that translates to THINKING OUTSIDE THE BOX includes:

#1 Study another industry, another field. #2 Retrain/Retool where you'll be better. #3 Consider working backwards.  Just like turning things upside down, working backwards breaks our brain's normal conception of casuality.  This is the key to backwards planning where you start with a goal and think back through the steps needed to reach it until you get to where you are right now.  

Perhaps one of the most profound effects of thinking outside the box is that it will help us to stay adaptable.  Our mind won't be cloned off to new ideas or solutions and therefore, that should position us in a much better spot to navigate through the ever changing landscape in our life.  If anyone else isn't sold to TRY TO COLOR OUTSIDE THE LINE or start THINKING OUTSIDE OF THE BOX, do give yourself a china man's chance for you to turnaround.  It's NEVER LATE to correct ourselves❗❗❗

Don't Lose That COMPASS in Life

Don't Lose That COMPASS in Life

Throughout these times, we kept harping that we should have a direction in life and that's a given.  What we missed out highlighting is that in going through our journey, there is one thing that is indispensable and that is the COMPASS.  Without it, we would likely get waylaid or lost along the way.  Why ?  There are multifarious reasons why our COMPASS becomes that handy.  Without sounding as a threat, a life with no COMPASS will be a life in peril and if I don't have to mince words, your life is doomed to fail with no COMPASS in life.

This poster may be one of the most exposed but I'd still piggy-back on this as this says it all.  It gives us the simplest equation, i.e. LIFE with COMPASS equates to DIRECTION whereas no COMPASS means NO DIRECTION. As a first-person account, I have witnessed lives with no direction at all.  Some were even well-bred, coming from decent middle-class families but as they [wrongly] thought that they didn't need any compass, their life just went berserk, nowhere to go.

Too bad, one too many things are intertwined in our life.  Your single misstep can cause you to get waylaid next.  Once you fumble once, you can stumble next.  Question is, why is it sometimes lightning seems to strike us non-stop?  Studies did show that a life that is direction-less is the most common culprit that causes a spate of failures and fallouts in life.  And this is where the COMPASS of our life kicks in again.

Question is, when can we discern that we seem not to have a COMPASS in life ?  These symptoms will lead us to that diagnosis:  LOST? CONFUSED? PERPLEXED?  DISORIENTED? Which symptoms are all self-explanatory.  Now, how can we get back on track ?  A few basic ground rules.  

#1-Grab a pen & paper. Write where you want to go

#2-Paint a scenario where money is not an object. So, envision yourself of the things you wanna do.

#3-Relook at those visualizations and revalidate it.

Unlocking the key for us is not a rocket science.  DISCOVER what energized you before.  DETECT what drained you.  Think 'SUPER SMALL'.  Good to think BIG but when you seem lost, move the goal post back to square one, at worst.  Look around.  You need a SUPPORT STRUCTURE, be it from your immediate family or trusted friends.  Just DON'T GIVE UP ON YOURSELF ❗❗❗