SINCERICIDE

SINCERICIDE

SINCERICIDE.  Yes Yes Yes. My reservoir of vocabulary increased by one today after stumbling across SINCERIDE which briefly, it's meaning is somewhere between AUTHENTICITY and SINCERITY.  Which is a tough call because personally, in real life, NOT everything you see or witness is AUTHENTHIC.  Neither are all people SINCERE.  This is NOT to bad-mouth but this is the stark TRUTH.  And the TRUTH is that there is a difference between telling the TRUTH and committing a SINCERICIDE.  Unfortunately in life, we DON'T always have this subtlety so WHEN we use the sword of TRUTH, we may possibly cause 'damage' [think about the offense of hurting someone [even if it was an unconscious one and NOT meant in bad faith]]📗📙📘

Honestly though, it is likely that everyone of us [and it includes moi] acted as SINCERICIDES on some occasions in the past [if NOT till now].  However, if saying the TRUTH so brazenly, hurting others, becomes our 'NORMAL' behavior, it would be good wondering WHY we have become that sort of 'KAMIKAZE OF TRUTH'.  And experts opine that on many occasions, this sort of suicidal attachment to TRUTH is the expression of something much deeper, WHICH may be the desire to 'punish' the other or even themselves💥💥💥

Psychologist further opine that SINCERICIDE is usually a person WHO believes he is being treated unfairly, OR feels he is NOT sufficiently valued OR being trampled.  And in these cases, it uses TRUTH as a 'legitimate' weapon to attack the world, which deeply disillusioned him.  Further studies show that there are those WHO might be called as 'BORN SINCERICIDES', those WHO think they are the only ones to be right and that their attachment to TRUTH allows them to pass on any type of social subtlety💦💦💦

And furthermore, these SINCERICIDES feel that the fact that it is a TRUTH that seems 'brighting like the sub' is a sufficient reason NOT to make unnecessary rides.  After all, these people are convinces that they are the only ones to be honest and that everyone else is lying, even just to 'adorn' the TRUTH and subtract part of its impact.  The disconnect here is that SINCERICIDES [wrongly] believe that they think that 'BEING HONEST' is equivalent to 'BEING GOOD', which is NOT❌❌❌

Our takeaway:  Let us NOT be one of those SINCERICIDES that being 'DIRECT', saying things as they are and not joking is an expression of consistency but actually seeing the damage they cause with their SINCERITY, their actions reveal a destructive intent, WHICH means they have a double moral since they do NOT act in accordance with WHAT they say to be.  The fact that a TRUTH is good for us does NOT mean that is good for the others as well, NO sirrrrrrrrs❗❗❗

YOLO, Life Is Too Short

YOLO, Life Is Too Short

True, we frequently hear all these and say these things that are supposed to be motivating and inspiring [OR at least make us feel better about the choices made in the quest for happiness] but if we dig deeper and take more than just a cursory look, they may be simply glib sound bites designed to take you away from the best parts of being alive.  Indeed, Life Is Too Short.  BUT life only feels short in retrospect, WHEN we look back and reminisce about the time that has passed.  Factually, it is a collection of moments.  How often have we noticed how frequently almost everyone utters the word 'YOLO', often to hype-up those "CAN'T MISS" opportunities.  'YOLO', the short for YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE and it's true if we think about it📗📙📘

Glancing at the above chart of 'FAMOUS DEATHs', NOT because dying makes us famous, The above chart is courtesy of 'waitbutwhy.com' and each of the dots represent ONE [1] week in our lifetime.  You can observe that most of the boxes are not fully filled.  Some of them have barely occupied even half of the little boxes on this table.  It implies that, WITHOUT THEM REALIZING IT, they had only a limited number of weeks in their lives.  In fact, NONE of them managed to fill all the tiny boxes and make it to age 90.  Sadly, they NEVER realized this.  And YES, that hit me like a truck running over me.  They, LIKE MOST OF US, often assume we have an abundance of time BUT the reality is that we NEVER truly know HOW much time we have OR HOW many little boxes are left💧💧💧

You may disagree [BUT I'll staunchly argue on this], more often than NOT, our time is limited.  Yes, that's all we got, our lives are those little boxes that will run out eventually and we may NEVER know WHEN that will happen.  All we have is a limited amount of time.  And as a procrastinator [before], I found that conclusion incredibly unsettling.  Often, we assume that we have tomorrow, BUT we overlook its uncertainty💥💥💥

All these made me reflect back on my life because admittedly, I had some dreams that I've left unfulfilled [BUT hey, LIFE IS TOO SHORT].  About a list of things I've always wanted to do, BUT I've been hesitant to start them.  WHY?  Because, long time back, I did often succumb to procrastination.  And NOT just about dreams.  Sometimes it's the smallest tasks that should be done right away.  Something I believe many can relate to.  TRUE, we all have a bit of PROCRASTINATOR in us, and there's likely at least one thing we delay, even in our daily lives.  HOW often have we told ourselves "I'LL WORK ON THIS TOMORROW" only to open your laptop and end up just scratching the surface❌❌❌

Our takeaway:  Remember even those seemingly casual situations WHEN you wanted to clean up your room then you ended up scrolling on your phone, ending stuck and glued at that Kevin Hart compilation on YouTube.  Thing is, we often delay tasks by saying "I'M FEELING LAZY TODAY, I'LL DO IT TOMORROW" BUT.... are you aware of the possibility that TOMORROW MAY NEVER COME?  THAT it's an uncertain concept and even a minute from now, we CAN'T predict WHAT will happen next.  Indeed, YOLO, LIFE IS TOO SHORT😌😌😌

Oversharing Gone Overboard

Oversharing Gone Overboard 

Long time back, what is personal, it's private and what is public, it's there 'wide open'.  This is where even museums were popular before because that's where things publicly shared are officially out there for your naked eyes.  Fast forward today, the line between private and public information has never been more blurred, whether you blame it on social media, reality TV or is it all because of that Covid-19 pandemic that caused Oversharing Gone Overboard📗📙📘

Chances are high that at one point or another, you and me have been guilty of OVERSHARING which, in literary parlance, is described as 'exclusively talking about personal matters and neglecting to volley the conversation back and forth'.  How many posts do we witness whether in Facebook, Instagram or elsewhere?  Do your friends and even co-workers know every intimate detail about your last [previous] relationship!@#$%?

OR worse, does every conversation somehow turn into a personal monologue?  It's great to be authentic and personable BUT you might be going too far with HOW much information you unload on those around you?  BUT we might hear from many naysayers like, WHAT'S WRONG WITH OVERSHARING?  There are simple, logical and practical [call it 'common sense'] reasons WHY OVERSHARING is really a NO-NO❌❌❌

YOU could be putting yourself at risk [or worse] in danger by revealing too much to the wrong person.  YOU could be treating someone as your FRIEND now but WHO knows if NEXT month, NEXT year[s], he/she has turned into your ENEMY?  And WHEN that happens, WHAT happens to everything you 'trustingly' SHARED to him/her during those times WHEN you were 'chummy-chummy'?  YOU may even tend to alienate people WHO would feel uncomfortable with the amount of 'personal' information you are SHARING.  At worst, YOU could even be taken advantage WHEN recounting problems to people WHO DON'T have your best interest in mind😌😌😌

Our takeaway:  Dig up the most probable reasons you're OVER-SHARING.  Is it because of your FALSE sense of intimacy?  OR is it because you're finding solace in a stranger? In that case, that could be a case of MISPLACED trust.  OR is there a misguided attempt to kind of 'fast track' a relationship?  OR there are just poor [call it blurred] boundaries between you and that supposed TRUSTED one?  All these indeed point us to OVERSHARING GONE OVERBOARD❎❎❎

Would You Believe? There Are Problems With TIME MANAGEMENT?

Would You Believe?  There Are Problems With TIME MANAGEMENT?

Would You Believe? There are tons and tons of TIME MANAGEMENT best practices.  And YET,  as time flies, fleets and floats away WHEN we have so much to do, there are TIME MANAGEMENT Problems.  Unfortunately, TIME can be equated to money, although NOT the kind you can deposit at the bank.  But hell no, TIME is perishable.  You have to make the most of it while it lasts.  And that's WHAT TIME MANAGEMENT is all about, right?  Your ability to maximize every minute of your day.  So, Would You Believe?  There Are Problems With TIME MANAGEMENT!@#$%?

Sadly, some people often feel robbed of it WHILE it still lasts.  Many people also feel impoverished WHEN it comes to TIME.  Ironically, many rich people feel this way too, that they have less TIME than they need.  TIME poverty OR feeling that we lack critical TIME is a sign of poor TIME MANAGEMENT and it can lead to unhappiness and productivity.  So, we got to stop wondering WHY TIME isn't as abundant as you want it to be.  Instead, let's hone our TIME MANAGEMENT skills, if we may please💧💧💧

Now, rather than we discuss the mechanics of all the tons of TIME MANAGEMENT best practices, the bottom line has always been HOW you waste your TIME and HOW to fix to be more productive.  And since we CAN'T discuss productivity without coming across TIME MANAGEMENT, it becomes a MUST within our sustainable productivity system and a mandatory tackle on your journey for self improvement.  Despite all these, HOW COME many of us still do it WRONG❎❎❎

It seems many of us still see TIME MANAGEMENT as a way of cramming up as many tasks as possible in the shortest amount of time.  They tend to see productivity as a quantitative success instead of a qualitative one.  And that is where it is fundamentally WRONG.  From a productivity perspective, you should analyze your goals, prioritize them based on your personal values and break it down into even the smallest steps that are more OR less valuable❗❗❗

Our takeaway:  IF you're using TIME MANAGEMENT to fit in as many tasks as possible, it probably means you DIDN'T prioritize your tasks and you DON'T know the value of each of them.  BUT there CAN'T be all that valuable.  So, you DON'T need to take them all in your TO-DO List.  Experts in TIME MANAGEMENT recommend that the 'WINNING SPLIT' should be something like 3 valuable tasks, 1 medium value task and 1 or 2 tasks that are NOT valuable BUT need to be done.  So, Would You Believe?  There Are Problems With TIME MANAGEMENT❓❓❓

WHAT IF Everyone Thinks You're Wrong BUT You're Right [Or Otherwise]?

WHAT IF Everyone Thinks You're Wrong BUT You're Right [Or Otherwise]?

WHAT IF Everyone Thinks You're Wrong BUT You're Right [Or Otherwise]?  We've all been in the circumstance WHERE we're having a conversation [OR sometimes, an argument] with someone and they're convinced you're wrong about something even though you know you're right.  WHETHER it's trivial facts OR serious issues, HOW you react to the accusation can turn the course of the whole conversation.  Of course sometimes we can fall into such infallibility battles even WHEN we're NOT arguing with a know-it-all.  We often slide into them and gradually, even with reasonable people💧💧💧

Sometimes, we do get exasperated with each other and even impatient to prove our point.  And to keep our boats afloat, we start rocking each other's boats.  Then, pretty soon the goal is sinking each other, proving once and for all that the other person is a complete nincompoop.  Psychologists have even coined the 'winner takes all, loser still pays' pattern.  Indeed, that goes a long way toward explaining WHY when we're in a hole we keep digging.  Experts confirm that those patterns show up even in wars, elections keeping up with the Joneses, gambling, investing and even informal arguments.  We invest then, having invested are unwilling to let go.  We're willing to pay almost anything to keep from losing but so are our competitors.  NO ONE willing to surrender❌❌❌

Experts have practical recommendations:

CHECK YOUR OWN ARGUMENTS FIRST - Just because you know you're right it DOESN'T mean getting into an actual argument is worth it.  As our forefathers shared their wisdom, CHOOSE YOUR BATTLES

DON'T BE EMOTIONALLY OVERWHELMED - WHEN you're opposed by someone, you tend to have an emotional response which is normal BUT experts advise it's best to keep calm💥💥💥

IT'S NOT ALWAYS NECESSARY TO CHANGE SOMEONE'S MIND - Sometimes it is just plain NOT worth it to try and change someone's mind.  UNLESS an issue is that serious enough, it's occasionally best to just agree to disagree and move on

SOME ISSUES ARE OBJECTIVE, SOME ARE SUBJECTIVE - With concrete issues, like the height of the tallest mountain], it's very possible you're right provided you have observable, objective and verifiable facts✅✅✅

Our takeaway:  Your relationship should dictate HOW you respond.  WHEN a friend OR  a family member says you're wrong about something you know HOW to temper your response because you've known them for a long time.  WHEN it's a stranger OR worse, a boss OR co-worker, it's important to weigh the usefulness of a response.  If your boss is vindictive, it's likely best to accept their wrongness and move on IF you want to keep your job [UNLESS their wrongness is a high risk and perilous to you OR even to your organization.  And IF you think you're CORRECT, make sure you're CORRECT.  It seems obvious to you that you're right BUT that DOESN'T mean you're NOT making assumptions.  And once you've decided it's actually worth reacting WHEN someone says you're wrong, it's time to formulate that response in a way that will actually get your point across❗❗❗

Multitasking, REALLY?

Multitasking, REALLY?

Today, the vast majority of us multitask while using our smartphones.  Checking our emails, surfing social media, texting, launching a long list of mobile apps, and then, you add in Netflix streaming at the background of the wall-mounted SmartTV, then you're grabbing some foodies while working OR while engaged in a conversation.  MULTITASKING has  become such a regular part of our lives that most of us that most of us believe we do it well.  Multi-tasking, REALLY❓❓❓

BUT here's a not so good news from neuro-scientists.  In their most recent studies, it found that people WHO were frequent media MULTITASKERS had reductions in their brains' grey matter, those areas related to cognitive control and the regulation of motivation and emotion.  They linked up their most recent study with a 2016 research WHICH found that chronic media MULTITASKERS manifested weakness in both their working memory [that ability to store relevant information while working on a task] and long-term memory [the ability to store and recall information over longer periods of time]💦💦💦

When the Covid-19 Pandemic broke out, there were studies covering people's MULTITASKING at home over a seven-day period and the common conclusion is that the more people MULTITASKED, the more likely they were to exhibit behavioral distractibility.  And the prevailing assumption is that by responding to so many distractions, one loses the ability to distinguish between important and unimportant interruptions💧💧💧

These days, WHAT's the common dilemma whether you are in Ankara [Turkey], Moscow [Russie], New Delhi or Mumbai [both in India], Jakarta [Indonesia] OR Manila [Philippines], MULTITASKING can make you walk into traffic.  Researchers compiled information of 1,400 pedestrians in New York City WHO were hit by a car, and discovered that 20 percent of teenagers reported being distracted by a mobile device WHEN they were stuck [as compared to 10% adults] in traffic💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  MULTITASKING hurts and impacts a lot.  Call it COLLATERAL DAMAGE.  A study in the classroom concluded that students WHO MULTITASKED scored lower in their exams.  From a health perspective, experts concluded that MULTITASKING can lead to falling and breaking bones.  A recent study of the elderly found that MULTITASKING was likely to affect women's gait, leading to a significantly greater number of falls and broken bones.  So, let's revisit the viability of MULTITASKING😕😕😕

When You Can't See The Forest

When You Can't See The Forest

This may NOT be happening 100% of the time BUT how often is it When You Can't See The Forest?  Should be QUITE OFTEN.  Thing is, in life, we're often upset by many annoyances and frustrations.  If only we can broaden our perspective to expand our mindfulness, strength and resilience.  Back to our lives, DIDN'T you observe how we're often bothered by many 'little things' and we end up NOT realizing their insignificance in the greater scheme of things.  Sadly, most of WHAT annoys us WON'T even be remembered hours or even weeks later.  Instead of dwelling on minor incidents and letting them ruin your day, consider the big picture and allow your broader, wiser perspective to shape your outlook.  So, WHY do we need to see the WHOLE FOREST?  The LARGER PERSPECTIVE?  The benefits are one too many and it's worth to take a sampling📗📙📘

These days, the velocity of CHANGE is moving at an increasing pace.  In fact, everyone of us would feel the immense pressures to deliver on our accountabilities while we continue to juggle the realities of today's world.  The problem is WHEN we constantly operate in this state, it can become too easy to lose sight of the BIG PICTURE.  Now, for a moment, let's consider the BIG PICTURE is a mountain top.  Picture yourself having hiked up to the top of the mountain and looking down at the valley below WHERE you live💎💎💎

While most of your time is spent in the valley living your everyday life, solving common problems and overcoming challenges, WHEN you do climb to the top of the mountain, you would then gain a new perspective.  From that perspective, you then can see things clearly that may have otherwise been so obvious.  Roads are NOT straight, homes and shops might NOT be ideally located.  Going to the top gives you that ability to observe and correct OR improve things that might otherwise be missed. So, the question to you will be, HOW can you be better💦💦💦

So, for us to see the BIG PICTURE, experts encourage us to ask these questions:

WHY are things occurring as they are?

WHAT is really necessary?

HOW do the various pieces fit into the grand scheme of things?

Still, the question bugging us is:  WHEN we get pulled in so many directions, with shifting priorities, and the never-ending pressure to produce the results💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  WHY should we aim for the BIG PICTURE instead of that narrowed view?

To ALLOW us to see opportunities to improve.

To ALLOW us to bring the BIG PICTURE view to be communicated across.

To REINFORCE the real reason for the activities you perform daily

Dude, moving forward, let us endeavor for the BIG PICTURE so we can holistically get the clearest picture possible😀😀😀

Don't Forget To Live

Don't Forget To Live

Don't Forget To Live.  Yes dude, many of us are guilty about being so engaged and focused making a living to the extent that we FORGET TO LIVE?  Or have we ever got so excited about what's to come in the future that we completely forgot to live in the present?  Oh, I was guilty of this in the past as well and I know for sure that many others either have dealt or are still dealing with this problem.  It's easy to forget about living life itself.  I remember when I was in High School, all I could think of was going to college and in turn, I admit I missed quick a chunk of my High School life.  Those are the days I'll never get back📗📙📘

Sure, many of us have the grandest visions about our future.  BUT here's the BUT.  BUT I didn't take the time to fully enjoy where I could have savored my moments.  During those times, I admit I DIDN'T take ownership but instead I was guilty for neglecting the present.  So why do we need to live life?  It's because the PRESENT is here to help develop and mold us into the individuals we need to become💦💦💦

Day by day, LIFE is fleeing from us.  It's NOT just youth that needs to be reminded of this.  We as adults and workers and entrepreneurs need the same reminder.  It is so easy to get caught up in the activities we're engaged that we completely forget to LIVE fully in the NOW.  Decades from now, you will look back thinking what a mistake it was to NOT be as PRESENT as you could have been📌📌📌

So, how is it WHEN sometimes, deep inside you feel like SOMETHING IS MISSING?  Oh Oh, maybe that's because we are living someone else's life?  Maybe we allowed other people to influence OR determine our choices OR worst, WHEN we are trying to please the expectations of others.  Social pressure is deceiving, we all become prey without even noticing it💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  Yes, sometimes we seem to have lost that passion.  Our FIX: Regain that passion for the life you want.  You need to recover the 'OWNERSHIP' of your choices.  True, expectations are hard to overcome.  So, WHY don't we sweep under the carpet that tendency to be pleasing others because that's like chasing a moving target.  In the end, people will even have multiple 'HOPES' for you.  So, let us agree that by trying to please everyone, we will likely end up pleasing no one [and that includes ourselves because by then you get frustrated of yourself]😌😌😌

Stating The Obvious [BUT UNSEEN]

Stating The Obvious [BUT UNSEEN]

Stating The Obvious [BUT UNSEEN] may seem the most boring stuff to discuss about BUT here's the thing, a lot of things that seem OBVIOUS are hardly seen, sometimes unseen OR there is just too little awareness that such thing ever exists, if at all.  So, this time around, we seem to be missing a huge chunk of stuff in life, all because we DON'T see the OBVIOUS📗📙📘

FIRST THINGS FIRST - Take hold of your morning right after you wake up.  Many of us end up wasting our day all because we DIDN'T take control of things right after we woke up.  Remember that FAUX PAS where you had to hit the snooze button???

PREPARE YOUR TASK LIST - If you DON'T have it, it is akin to departing from the port to cross from the Pacific to Atlantic Oceans BUT with no travel itinerary, no scheduled port of calls.  The worst casualty here will be your PRIORITY TASKS that will end up mixed up with all the other tasks including the non-sensical.  WHO wants to take a journey like this???

UNLESS you are now enjoying your well-deserved retirement holidaying in the Mediterranean, we all need to take calculated RISKS in life.  It's as simple as crossing the street.  If you DON'T want to take the risk of [remotely BUT possibly] being run over when crossing, then DON'T get out of your home.  BUT where does that leave you???

ENDEAVOR TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE - If you want to wake up the next day, making that new day just similar the previous day, just another uneventful day, you're about to waste that new dawning day.  WHAT A WASTED DAY

AVOID INDECISIONS - As it is unavoidable to get into situations where some decisions are NOT that easy to be made, NEVER run away or AVOID those moments of INDECISION.  Conventional wisdom tells us that there is either a CORRECT decision versus a WRONG decision.  BUT do you know that the WORST WRONG decision is WHEN one is indecisive and either delays or avoids making a decision.  WHAT hurts most is that those INDECISIONS mean that you are losing by DEFAULT, even by NOT lifting your finger💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  Many things in life are SIMPLE ENOUGH.  Sadly, in many circumstances, it is us who make things complicated.  And the worst skewed thinking is that when you avoid difficult situations that need to be resolved, you are pushing yourself in a much deeper morass.  Allow me as well to quote EN TOTO these five SIMPLE RULES.  Nothing to elaborate OR window-dress in these most simple rules ever, which psychologists declare are directly beneficial to improve and even get that HAPPINESS embedded in our daily life.  Dude, this is STATING THE OBVIOUS [BUT UNSEEN though]💧💧💧

Fake Dopamine, Anyone?

Fake Dopamine, Anyone?

Guess WHAT is the 'celebrity'  among our brain chemicals?  You got it right, dude.  It's the DOPAMINE.  As it's called neurotransmitters, DOPAMINE is indeed involved in addiction BUT it isn't a 'pleasure chemical'.  In fact, experts confirm that it has lots of functions in our brain, being involved in everything from regulating movement to the control of attention.  And in greater part, its effects depend on WHICH of the brain's pathways it is operating in.  Problem is, WHENEVER we hear DOPAMINE, it's usually a vague reference to the role of DOPAMINE.  Researched and case studies in the Las Vegas environments have been good samples of FAKE DOPAMINE📗📙📘

Studies made on the Las Vegas roulette players have recorded as much activity in the 'accumbens' when punters lose money with a miserable 'NEAR MISS' as WHEN they have an enjoyable win.  In this case, DOPAMINE seems NOT to be signaling pleasure BUT instead indicating HOW close you got to the reward and thus, encouraging you to go for another attempt!@#$%?  And experts say that this works well WHEN success depends on skill BUT falsely compels us in games of chance. And this makes our head spin💧💧💧

It's true we all receive a hit of DOPAMINE each time we check social media posts or even our mobile phones.  BUT hey hey hey, hey, hey, 'overproduction' of this pleasure/reward chemical can lead to problems and 'DOPAMINE FASTING' or ignoring your phone is meant to reset your brain.  Do you feel like your brain is in need of a REBOOT?  If you say that in front of someone WHO is hip to the latest wellness trends, they might even suggest you go on a DOPAMINE FAST💥💥💥

BTW, even in the United States, on average, people spend 2 to 4 hours per day either tapping, typing and/or swiping on their devices So, that adds up to over 2,600 touches daily touches.  Problem is, most of us have become so intimately entwined with our digital lives such that we sometimes feel our phones vibrating in our pockets WHEN THEY ARE NOT EVEN THERE???

Our takeaway:  DON'T get me wrong, we need that DOPAMINE.  BUT the biggest BUT, we DON'T need the FAKE DOPAMINES.  Again, please DON'T get me wrong.  NOTHING wrong with social media BUT things get skewed WHEN/IF we cling [and frankly, MONITOR] our smart devices if there is a NEXT like, a NEXT emoji, a NEXT follower, a NEXT flattering comment.  NOT to scare everyone BUT recent studies show links between smartphone usage and increased levels of anxiety, depression, poor sleep quality and even increased risk of car accidents causing injuries and deaths.  WHY ARE SMARTPHONES SO HARD TO IGNORE!@#$%?