Doomscrolling, Anyone?

Doomscrolling, Anyone?

Before I get whacked for dousing cold water on AI, our thread today is more on How to increase your DOOMSCROLLING Awareness, that's the long and short of it.  Oh yes, everyone has done it.  We pick up our phone while in a perfectly good mood, only to be inundated with notifications and social media messages bringing you up to speed on the worst news and most infuriating hot takes that humanity can offer.  So, How's your DOOMSCROLLING Awareness???

Suddenly, you feel terrible BUT instead of putting down your phone, you dive in further, feeling that your anxiety seems to be building up with every swipe and tap.  This happens several times a day and YET, we all STILL constantly reach for our phones.  YES, the mind-boggling questions are:  WHY DO WE DO THIS & HOW CAN WE STOP IT?  For alignment, let's trace back how this DOOMSCROLLING jargon came about💧💧💧

While Mr Google says DOOMSCROLLING has been around since 2018, it started to steamroll in our lives when we got hit with that dreaded pandemic in 2020.  And to give credit to WHOM it is due, American investigative journalist Karen Ho built that DOOMSCROLLING bot on that site formerly known as Twitter and that bot would remind people to take care of themselves in the midst of the pandemic💥💥💥

BUT WHO realized that WHAT DOOMSCROLLING is doing is to rob us of our time, energy + focus WHEN there are much more important things to put focus on.  BUT rather fight DOOMSCROLLING and end up with a pyrrhic victory, let's equip ourselves with the 'BASICs' to spot and even break those NEGATIVE LOOPS [no thanks to DOOMSCROLLING].  Now let's admit it, most of us [and I'm one of the guilty ones], we have that tendency to seek out NEGATIVE news and social media algorithms even would boost it.  So, DOOMSCROLLING is really a habit that emerges in part because of the way the places we get information about the world are organized😕😕😕

Our takeaway:  The things you and me do interact with on services like Twitter, Tiktok and Instagram affect the kinds of information you are likely to show up more in your timeline.  And social networks DON'T have an 'END' as their algorithm will keep showing you NEW things as long as you keep on scrolling.  The perverse thing is that DOOMSCROLLING begins with good intentions.  You want to keep with the news BUT a combination of algorithms and human nature can make you so vulnerable to focus only on the horrible things [AS IF that's the entire story].  Let's be cautious with DOOMSCROLLING dude.  Do recognize your 'triggers' before you get 'hostaged' by social media❗❗❗

[ADVISORY ALERT] 'Chrome Update' Scam!

[ADVISORY ALERT] 'Chrome Update' Scam!

In toto, we are wholly pasting here the alert from Lifehacker.com [dated January 31, 2025]: @ https://lifehacker.com/tech/chrome-update-scam-wordpress-sites?utm_source=email&utm_medium=newsletter&utm_campaign=thedownload&zdee=gAAAAABl_RKRQ6UZytNNCbikeuTyJ5kxb3eILhy_zw1ERxD2HTRQBkA0bISJ31SxQ6TXEykbz_aFrxLTRG8PSKGQ8Fnr9ZEikw6ZT1oDZsGGdrWh3StAbO8%3D&lctg=45443382888[ADVISORY ALERT] 'Chrome Update' Scam!

Software updates are important and inevitable.  To expand features and patch existing security issues, you need to update your apps and machines. If you avoid updating, you might find certain programs, functions, or even websites stop working as they should.  However, if you visit a website, and you see a prompt to update Chrome in order to proceed, run away. In all likelihood, you just encountered a scam. Don't fall for it.

The scam in question is targeting WordPress websites—10,000 of them, in fact. That's according to c/side, a web security company, whose research uncovered the current attacks.

Here's what's going on: Hackers are hijacking sites that are running outdated versions of WordPress and plugins. (c/side hypothesizes attackers are exploiting a vulnerability in a particular WordPress plugin to execute their schemes.) Attackers are using two types of "popular" malware variants: AMOS (Atomic macOS Stealer), which goes after Apple devices, and SocGholish, which is designed for Windows devices.

When you visit one of these affected websites, hackers override the actual content of the site with a new, fake page.

This manipulated content purports to be an alert that you need to update your browser in order to visit this site, as the page uses "the new chromium engine." The hackers sprinkle in a few different elements on this page to sell the scam, including two different update options, a check box to sign up or automatic usage stats and crash reports, and links to Google's, Chrome's, and ChromeOS' Terms of Service. You'll also see a Chrome logo, different menu options, and a rendering of a Chrome window.

Our takeaway here:  Let's continue to sharpen our eyes in ensuring that an UPDATE prompt LEGITIMATELY comes from a LEGITIMATE source website owned by the LEGITIMATE software.  As I am a 'full-blown' end-user of Chrome, be literally WATCHFUL because there are tons and tons of Chrome ADD-INs.  Ensure that every ADD-IN is LEGITIMATELY sourced.  To be forewarned is to be forearmed❗❗❗

Why Do We Have 2 Ears & 1 Mouth?

Why Do We Have 2 Ears & 1 Mouth?

Epictetus, the Greek Philosopher [WHO is more famous for being a slave in Rome & got freed only after Nero's death] has always been well quoted Why Do We Have 2 Ears & 1 Mouth?  To quote him, we got those so that WE CAN LISTEN TWICE AS MUCH AS WE SPEAK. BUT the $64 question is:  Is that prevailing most of the time in our daily lives [and around us]???  I really seriously doubt it❗❗❗

And I vividly remember those same words from my grandma [during her waning years].  I even recall this frank [BUT alas, realistic] unsolicited advice:  STOP TELLING PEOPLE YOUR BUSINESS.  SOME PEOPLE TALK TO YOU SO THEY CAN TALK ABOUT YOU.  Sounds true?  Me thinks, there is more truth than fiction in that statement.  So, you might ask:  HOW CAN I STOP TELLING PEOPLE and WHEN SHOULD I KNOW I AM AN OVER-SHARER?  YES, there is that gray line.  WHAT we can do is to pay attention to small things, especially WHEN the exchange veers towards becoming one-sided.  Brevity-wise, think about your PRIVACY.  DON'T share it.  NOT to be cynical, an ill-intentioned one can use it against you❌❌❌

As we do have our strengths and weaknesses, WHERE possible, DON'T share your weakness [WHO knows it may be used against you in the future].  YESSSS, we are entitled to celebrate milestone successes and achievements BUT prior to that, DON'T share as to WHEN you'll start it.  That's just a NO-NO.  NOT even your future plans [UNLESS you are 1000000000% cocksure about its success]!@#$%?

YES, this reminds me of this scenario.  Have you ever been to the wilderness [that could be a hike] WHEN you just stopped and made a point to listen to the sounds of nature?  Less than a year ago, I was in those circumstances WHEN we went hiking at the remote Nunobiki Falls up there in Kobe, Japan.  That was quite an overdue realization for me but as the old cliche goes, BETTER LATE THAN NEVER✅✅✅

Our takeaway:  Let's give more credence [and importance] to LISTENING.  It can be just as rewarding and even hearing a different BUT valuable insight [and often, from a different perspective from yours] can lead you to gain a deeper understanding of things you may [still] be unaware of].  And if it's about feedbacking, it may trigger an idea OR initiative to improve things.  I recall WHEN I resided in Singapore for 8 years, even a tiny, nondescript shop will have a stack of FEEDBACK FORMS atop the nook of their sales counter [and I'll say that 90% of the time, I spent time sharing my feedback [BTW - in most cases, they were positive ones].  Regardless, by sharing that feedback, I am optimistic that our 2 ears and 1 mouth are used MORE proportionately😄😄😄

When The Going Gets Tough

When The Going Gets Tough

No sirrrs, I'm not pitching Billy Ocean's song lyrics When The Going Gets Tough, The Tough Gets Going.  Out of curiosity, I still did look up the meaning of these lyrics although it's pretty obvious.  BUT in real life, this tells us that WHEN the situation gets difficult, strong people can and MUST step up and handle the escalating situation.  True, there are times to step up and get through something difficult  BUT sometimes, pushing through may NOT be the best option📗📙📘

Many years ago, my musician first cousin was so eager to teach me playing the guitar BUT after donkey failed attempts, I even 'donated' my guitar.  The thing is, the guitar required me to reach that complete musical sound BUT I just CAN'T.  HOW's that for a good excuse for NOT learning to play the guitar?  Was I too impatient OR perhaps more likely, I just DIDN'T have the drive to learn playing the guitar.  In the business world, however, WHEN difficulties arise, the decision is often made to tough it out WHEN something ISN'T working as planned.  And one of the most common justifications for this is, "WE'VE INVESTED TOO MUCH TO STOP, SO, ALTHOUGH WE KNOW THERE ARE BIG PROBLEMS, LET'S KEEP GOING".  After the dust settles, everyone is patting themselves on the back and calling themselves resilient, successful and even celebrating the outcome.  BUT at what cost???

Now, regardless WHETHER the GOING GETS TOUGH in our personal life or in our professional OR business life, WHEN difficulties start to feeling overwhelming, it's time to pause and ask if it makes sense to be the one singing "THE TOUGH GETS GOING".  Simply put, when the GOING GETS TOUGH, we only have these choices, namely:

• CHANGE something in the ongoing execution of the plan
• ACCEPT something as it is and see if you could move on
• JUST GIVE UP

This is WHEN mental toughness comes in, as that is paramount for achieving any lofty goal OR overcoming extreme hurdles.  Few great things in this world come without a little bit of adversity though.  And nothing amazing happens inside our comfort zones.  WHETHER we are talking about earning a promotion, nurturing a challenged marriage, mastering a sport, building up a startup business OR battling a serious illness, suffering will surface in various forms and shape.  That tells a mouthful  as to why the things we love and work hard are rewarding😌😌😌

Our takeaway:  The psychological traits of grit and RESILIENCE have been widely researched BUT it does still pose a challenge as it relates to how we actually develop mental toughness.  And this brings us back to RESILIENCE.  How do we build it?  Do some people have 'larger sums' in their RESILIENCE bank accounts than others?  Experts state that RESILIENCE is like any muscle.  With focus and determination, you can strengthen your mind to overcome any obstacle WHEN THE GOING GETS TOUGH❗❗❗

How Far Can You Go With 'GOOD INTENTIONS'?

How Far Can You Go With 'GOOD INTENTIONS'?

There's this old proverb which remains to be one of my top fave ones.  THE ROAD TO HELL IS PAVED WITH GOOD INTENTIONS.  So, WHAT are we really talking about WHEN we talk about our INTENTIONS?  Obviously, it refers to the reasons we do things.  Of course our meaning for taking an ACTION [and that's the INTENTION supposedly] and then the outcome of that ACTION, they DON'T always directly relate.   How Far Can You Go With 'GOOD INTENTIONS'?  And do we hear ourselves OR someone else ask, WHY DO I ALWAYS LET OTHERS DOWN DESPITE MY GOOD INTENTIONS?  Problem is, some of us DON'T naturally see the perspective of others OR easily understand those around us.  So, we impose our own views on the other person [WHICH is simply wrong]

The disconnect arises WHEN thinking through an action we are taking with an intent to help someone else, experts counsel us to ask ourselves:

• Have I considered the perspective of the person?
• Is this choice will help them?  Or is it for myself?
• Should I ask how to help instead of assuming?

So, good INTENTIONS for others are indeed good for us too, for obvious reasons.  If we have the good INTENTIONS for others, they are more likely to have good INTENTIONS to us as well💦💦💦

BUT various researches show that if we consciously decide to do things to be kind, we will feel better, regardless of HOW the other then treats us.  Just this afternoon, I was walking back to my parked car and I saw a long queue of cars obviously looking for parking space.  Although I was a few meters away from my car, I did wave to the driver of the car approaching, pointing to my car and he promptly enabled his HAZARD blinker.  With that almost effortless INTENTION, I felt good that I helped someone find his space to park his car.  And WHILE we might have NO trouble intending good things for others, it might be a different story WHEN it comes to ourselves.  We might say that we INTEND to be happy, have a job we like, and be in a loving relationship.  And we might consciously believe it.  So then, WHY do we feel miserable, keep taking jobs we hate, find ourselves endlessly attracted to destructive relationships?  Sounds familiar???

YES, even if we consciously INTEND good things for ourselves, it might be entirely a different story altogether WHEN it comes to our unconscious INTENTIONS.  There we might find we have WHAT are called by psychologists as 'limiting beliefs', even those unconscious assumptions we made as children we then mistake them as 'FACT'?  And then, we live our lives by, whew.  To truly have good INTENTIONS for ourselves, we need to look at WHAT beliefs are holding us back, process the experiences that gave us such NEGATIVE beliefs and commit to having better ones.  NOW, before you give up on yourself, the fact is it is NOT unusual to NOT meet all our INTENTIONS.  A study that has been repeated year on year has reconfirmed over and over again that at least, 20% of us NEVER get to keep with our respective NEW YEAR's resolutions, NEVER as in NEVER.  Sounds fiction but that's an undeniable statistic repeated year on year❎❎❎

Our takeaway:  Often times, it is a case of understanding WHAT a good goal is and HOW to implement it.  And this could mean learning the SMART model [i.e. Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and Timely].  It can also like engaging others to support our good INTENTIONS.  Recent studies show that when there is a follow through, it increases by at least 20% the probability of achieving the good INTENTIONS.  So, how far can you go with your good INTENTIONS dude???

Is Pain Embedded In Life?

Is Pain Embedded In Life?

True, NO ONE wants to suffer BUT let's face it, life is [generally] pegged to PAIN.  And we all hue to the general rule that people like to avoid hurt and PAIN as much as possible.  And as species, we humans always dream of a PAINLESS existence so much so we end up hearing scientists make a living trying to create it.  True, life has evolved.  People can choose PAIN-free labor when delivering a baby, and even remedies to cure back pain, body pains, name it.  Beyond medicine, however, Is Pain Embedded In Life???

Beyond medicine and Pharmacology, we also work hard to experience little PAIN even when a loss happens in our life.  BUT if people never experienced hurt, they WOULDN'T know WHAT it was in the first place.  And on the surface, that may seem like a blessing?  BUT c'mon, let's think for a moment.  IF we never encountered PAIN, then we WON'T know what PAIN is, right???

An analogy here is IF ever we step on an open nail.  Ouch, definitely our foot will experience PAIN and at that moment, we WON'T blurt as to how good OR nice our hands are.  BUT if we DIDN'T know PAIN, how can we appreciate as to WHAT peace is?  And if we're NOT aware that we got hurt, HOW would we know that we got to heal?  This scares BUT imagine only knowing that you reached an incurable stage of cancer WHEN there were NO obvious symptoms in its early stages???

And WHAT complicates things is that sometimes, WITHOUT feeling PAIN, people WON'T be aware of dangerous situations and WHAT they should do and what they should NOT do, for survival sake.  Thing is, the fact that life is PAIN in itself is ultimately a good thing for all of us.  Much as PAIN serves to protect us human beings from harmful actions, it's the same reason parents teach babies that fire equates to hotness and hotness equates to hurt.  So, should the baby still place its hands in a fire on a stove???

Our takeaway:  Let's agree on this. WHETHER it is a shattering PAIN, like the loss of a loved one OR even a debilitating accident, PAIN affects everyone differently BUT nevertheless, everyone is still affected.  BUT can we appreciate the importance of PAIN in our life?  As the old cliche goes, NO PAIN, NO HAPPINESS.  And you only know happiness WHEN you have known the PAINS in life.  And while the idea of constant happiness sounds nice, there is very little chance [if at all] that it would be.  Without the comparison to happiness, there's NO reason to be grateful for it.  That is to say, without ever knowing sadness OR pain, you would have NO reason to be grateful for happiness.  In reality and in fact, there is always something missing in life OR something unpleasant BUT it is through those realizations that you will know to be grateful WHEN you feel you have it all😊😊😊

Will We Regret [Later In Life] If We Were Either PASSIVE Or AGGRESSIVE?

Will We Regret [Later In Life] If We Were Either PASSIVE Or AGGRESSIVE?

At many points in our lives, rather than be passive OR aggressive, we tend to be 'PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE' but alas, many of us tend to be NOT aware of it.  Will We Regret [Later In Life] If We Were Either PASSIVE Or AGGRESSIVE?  BUT let's be mindful that things can be situational.  For instance, if you've had your car in to a repair shop several times for the same problem and they want to charge you for fixing it again, you can stamp your foot down by being verbally aggressive, that might accomplish your agenda📗📙📘

Conversely, if you are confronted with an irrational person, a self-protective PASSIVE response of walking away may be the best way to go.  And while I always pitched that communications styles we choose should be based n the outcome we want, when it comes to managing our life, the wild question is should be passive OR conservative by playing it safe and avoiding risks, where possible, because you're aiming for modest goals of just going through in life?  OR would you be aggressive enough by being adventurous and take on the risks with the expectation that you can win BIG and succeed BIG💧💧💧

If communication problems are interfering in your relationships, it might be a good idea to examine WHETHER you have PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE behavior.  By recognizing WHEN you have that PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE approach, you can opt to change your pattern and develop better relationships .  The thing is, we need to constantly review even our own behavior because there is NO ONE SIZE THAT FITS ALL💥💥💥

Experts claim that in their studies, the behavior of being PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE can either be 'self protective' in some way OR it is a learned behavior and it can occur because of either of the following considerations:

• Learned communication patterns - Unless we deliberately seek out new methods of communication, we tend to use the ones that we learned early in life

• Fear of rejection - Some people are afraid that if they are 'DIRECT', the other person may reject their request.  As such, the PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE behavior allows the person to deny responsibility if confronted 

Our takeaway:  WHETHER you would opt to be PASSIVE or AGGRESSIVE in achieving your goals in life, circumstances should dictate when you should be conservative to avoid taking risks OR decide to take on risks [without regrets]😌😌😌

How Non-Progression Can Be Progress?

How Non-Progression Can Be Progress?

How often would you hear your 'gym buff' friend say, 'I KEEP WORKING OUT, BUT I'M NOT SEEING PROGRESS'.  While others would seem to gripe like "I'VE BEEN GRINDING FOR DONKEY YEARS BUT NOTHING HAS CHANGED".  How Non-Progression Can Be Progress?  There is NO simple answer for this conundrum but the fact is, PROGRESSION is NEVER linear, NOT to anyone anytime📗📙📘

And there's a long list of reasons why sometimes, we seem to have stalled, with NO visible progression at all.  WHAT befuddles us sometimes is WHEN we start comparing our own situation with others.  You'll question WHY you and your buddy enrolled in the gym classes at the same time, with the same schedules, same frequency and here's your buddy now, showing off the results as to HOW fit he is💥💥💥

BUT hold on, before we end up in a fierce discourse, can we agree that different people have different progressions.  There is NO common timeline shareable across your coterie of friends, your colleagues or even within your family.  And even for those who seem to have stalled with NO progress at all, it will be grossly unfair to make a premature judgment call that someone has failed because he has NOT progressed.  Unknown to everyone else, maybe the person him/herself has a much bigger challenge at hand, a gargantuan issue that will take much more time and efforts for him to exert.  WHEREAS it could be a breeze for another colleague, even if they are in the same program💦💦💦

Trainings are classic stories because it is never easy and there could be tons of reasons WHY people quit the iron game.  Allow me to even say that if the training was easy [IF AT ALL], then everyone would be big, strong, ripped, name it.  BUT it's NOT and it will NOT be because it will be either hard or damn hard.  And I WOULDN'T have it any other way.  Any results you achieve, you have to earn that all by yourself.  NO one can do the work for you, and that's WHAT I have fully embraced as well.  Many times, I would hear that the average life span of a competitor in strenuous programs is about three years BUT again, strength sports may NOT be for everyone, in the first place😌😌😌

Our takeaway:  Regardless if we are talking about life goal plans or trainings, allow me to cull from the tips from experts:

• Stick to that program, even if you are stalled.
• If you can't stick to a schedule, do what's doable
• Taking breaks too long may further stall you.
• Where possible, avoid/minimize distractions

At the end of the day, even NON-PROGRESSION can be PROGRESS in itself ❗❗❗

Stop Trying Harder!!!

Stop Trying Harder!!!

When we were children, we often felt confident.  We had that spark of innocence and joy, and we DIDN'T know WHAT it was to feel inadequate.  BUT as we grow up, our worlds get bigger and simply more complex.  As a result, we start to wonder IF we're good enough for this world.  We might even compare ourselves to others OR set unrealistic expectations for ourselves based on other people's standards.  This is particularly the case WHEN it comes to to perfectionism.  Listen dude.  Stop Trying Harder!!!

True, WHENEVER we want to do something, it has to be done just right, even if this means spending hours on end agonizing over WHAT simple word should go in a sentence OR WHICH outfit looks the best.  A common culprit for all these is our tendency to veer towards PERFECTIONISM.  And one of the best ways to stop BEING HARD on yourself is to understand the very roots of one's PERFECTIONISM.  For some, it might be that they NEVER got the support they needed growing up.  For others, it might be their FEAR OF FAILURE.  WHATEVER the reason is, understanding WHY you are so HARD ON YOURSELF is the very first step to overcoming it💧💧💧

Take some time for yourself to really think about WHAT your perfectionism means.  WHAT are you trying to achieve?  WHAT are you afraid of if you DON'T succeed?  WHAT would happen if you just accepted that you're NOT perfect and that's okay?  Once you are able to answer these questions, it will be easier to take the next step WHICH is, letting go of your PERFECTIONISM, if at all.  BUT experts tell us that in their researches, they have proven that there are also other ways you can stop BEING HARD ON YOURSELF if this DOESN'T work for you.  And topping the list is to FIND SUPPORT.  If you find that you're BEING HARD ON YOURSELF, it's time to stop💥💥💥

So WHAT's our next step?  It's to find someone you can talk about your struggles.  This could be a friend, a family member or even a co-worker WHOM you can trust and comfortable to talk to, with regard your struggles.  Talking to someone about the things that are troubling you will allow you to gain perspective on the situation.  The last thing you can [HARSHLY] do for yourself is to cloister and lock yourself on your own❌❌❌

Our takeaway:  Sometimes [and probably MANY TIMES], our situations in life are NOT as complex as they seem.  And frankly, sometimes [and probably MANY TIMES], we are guilty for making our situation complex and maybe miserable.  Please consider to also take time for yourself every day.  TURN OFF your mobile phone, put your smart device away, spend time alone.  Doing this will allow you to come back to the world feeling refreshed and ready to take on the next step❗❗❗

Restocking Your Pond

Restocking Your Pond

Our life runs through terrains with peaks and valleys.  And as you thread farther, it should be a no-brainer that our future is NEVER set in stone BUT we are all equipped at least with a pen and paper to write a good plan ahead.  To build up on your resources, establishing networks and even securing your property and life will always be part of your plan and budget.  Truth is, you CAN'T predict WHAT the next minute will bring forth.  BUT instead, let's consider Restocking Your Pond📗📙📘

Thus, it just makes sense for us to be preparing to face and be confronted with complicated future situations and even those unforeseen events as they come to save you from unnecessary headaches and even distress.  BUT alas, when the sun is shining and dandy, that's WHEN we forget that we got to be RESTOCKING OUR POND✅✅✅

Essentially, we got to have that ability to wield our own power to call the shots in our life.  You DON'T want to be sailing rudderless out in the high seas.  So, if ever you are RESTOCKING YOUR POND, at some point WHEN you want to call it quits, you will make that decision on the basis of that self assurance that you're ready for the next phase in your life because all along, you did the RESTOCKING of YOUR POND.  It's akin WHEN you go on a holiday away from work OR business, you do it without worrying about anything💥💥💥

Similarly, if something happens out of nowhere, you are ready to face even the unpredictable twists and turns in your life.  In short, planning for your future is more about creating and accomplishing your goals, getting your finances in order, and knowing WHAT to do the very next minute.  You want to wake up daily knowing WHERE to go and WHAT to do to stay in line with your plans and goals✅✅✅

Our takeaway:  True, many people do struggle many times in their life even as they endeavor to achieve their life goals.  Alas, WHEN they feel they have everything planned, a misfortune takes them back to square one.  Getting your life planned and everything organized gives you fulfillment, completeness and self-energization.  Dude, you DON'T want to RESTOCK YOUR POND when the downpours will trigger floods that will eventually sweep you away.  RESTOCK YOUR POND dude❗❗❗