Our Life-long 'MERRY-GO-ROUND' Rides!

 

Can I make one small request for now:  That our last thread for this 2025 should be lighter and less serious please?  On that note, allow me to share EN TOTO the Quora.com post by Richard Strachan:  My flight was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant, who seemed to put everyone in a good mood as he served us food and drinks.  As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and told us that "Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he'll be landing the big scary plane shortly, so lovely people, if you could just put your trays up, that would be super."On his trip back up the aisle, he noticed this well-dressed and rather Arabic-looking woman hadn't moved a muscle. "Perhaps you didn't hear me over those big brute engines but I asked you to raise your trazy-poo, so the main man can pitty-pat us on the ground."She calmly turned her head and said, "In my country, I am called a Princess and I take orders from no one."  To which (I swear) the flight attendant replied, without missing a beat, "Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country I'm called a Queen, so I outrank you.  Tray-up, Bitch."💚💛💜

A small lesson here:  You can be the head of family in your household OR the CEO of your organization BUT out there, we have a level playing field.  We are all and will remain EQUALs in life.  No favorites.  No handicaps. Regardless as to WHERE we are in our social strata, that DOESN'T matter at all because WHAT matters most and WHAT sets each of us apart is HOW do we steer our lives, HOW do we navigate through the travails and turmoils, HOW do we keep [at the very least] our head above the waters and HOW we remain resilient everytime we end up off-track❌❌❌

YES dude, from another dimension, our LIFE remains akin to the circle.  NO matter WHAT beast you make of yourself OR HOW bright one side is, inevitablythe dark side comes again.  BUT the beauty of the circle is, ROUND WE GO.  Comparing ourselves to the golfers WHO get drenched by the scorching heat of the sun out in the golf course, we are all AT PAR, NO handicaps, NO deprivations, NO differentiations.  And YES, our life is a merry-go-round no less!  Enjoy the ride and get off as you please.  Out there in those merry-go-round amusement parks, we really DON'T understand human nature UNLESS and UNTIL you know WHY a child on a merry-go-round will wave at his parents every time around and WHY his parents will always wave back.   Those subtle realities in life😌😌😌

YES, those merry-go-round rides, I really loved it despite sometimes those spins made me nauseous and the somewhat 'bumpy' ride left me with a headache.  BUT there was always something magical about those roundabouts that seem to have given me [ALWAYS] that free reign to the imagination.  In retrospect, one could say they conjure up images that extend way beyond the playful to other realities in life.  The bright lights of life welcome us  to the playground of life and takes us to that spin over and over again.  YES, sometimes the spin is bumpy and at other times, smooth enough and as a bonus, it feels like the ride is filled with music.  And YES, we can react in a happy, sad, angry OR fearful manner BUT no matter our reaction, the ride, like life, continues until it's time to get off😡😡😡

Our takeaway:  To sound poetic, if I had my life to live over, I would probably start barefoot earlier in the spring and stay that way later in the fall.  And if I were a girl, I'll probably go for more dances and YES, I'd love to ride more merry-go-rounds and pick daisies randomly.  And going back to our shared Quora.com story about that flight attendant, I'll probably be more circumspect and tactful, without assuming that when I'm airborne, I'm the in-flight queen!@#$%^ HAPPY NEW YEAR folks💥💥💥

Hope Springs Eternal

 

HOPE SPRINGS ETERNAL.  Oooops, another boring cliche, if you may blurt out.  BUT with NEW YEAR 2026 just around the corner, it behooves that we reinvigor the genuine meaning of HOPE.  With 2026 looming within the coming 48 hours, it is plainly obvious WHY these coming days could lead us to be more convinced [more than ever] that with HOPE comes new beginnings to almost everyone of us.  For those WHO seem hesitant to embrace the coming NEW YEAR, it's perfectly fine because it's everyone's prerogative💜💛💚

As SPRING follows closely the very heels of HOPE, it is easy to see WHY these coming days would likely lead us to HOPE.  As the word SPRING says it all, it can mean to come forth with energy.  This reminds me of the NETFLIX movie HOPE SPRINGS ETERNAL WHEN a teen with terminal cancer miraculously finds herself in remission.  HOPE of course is the belief one holds WHEN going through difficult circumstances, sometimes HOPING against HOPE that things will simply get better.  YES, it is unique to our species because it requires words and thoughts to contemplate possible future events.  YES, through the years, there are countless moments WHEN everyone of us will be clutching the last straws of HOPE✅✅✅

I've known first hand people WHO were raised in destitute circumstances and yet, they never lost HOPE and that enabled them to withstand and at times overcome those humps on the road, grow as a person and at times, be the last man standing.  WHICH reminds me of physicians, WHEN handling patients with critical illness, without being deceptive, they would present encouraging possiblities even WHEN breaking a seemingly BAD NEWS to the patient💥💥💥

By its very nature, HOPE is always equated to optimism.  IF you are a chronic and perennial pessimist, that is pitiful IF NOT despicable because that can devoid and deprive one to find even the least glimmer of HOPE in the midst of those cloudy and sometimes stormy weather in life.  BUT let's be fair here.  The presence of HOPE is secular and universal and serves as a personal beacon muck akin to a lighthouse beckoning us during those periods of darkness that worsens WHEN stormy weather hits us all❌❌❌

Our takeaway:  Let's NOT sugarcoat here.  HOPE by itself provides us a haven from pessimism and fear.  More importantly, HOPE galvanizes our courage and mobilizes our energy and vitality.  YES, I can attest to it.  WHEN I had to weather the worst storms in my life from the distant past, HOPE did enhance my mood and even creative thinking.  Think about it, IF you're down in the pits and your mood is worst than worse, HOW in the world can you think clearly?  And by thinking clearly, that should pave the way for you to come up with informed decisions.  BIG thanks because HOPE SPRINGS ETERNAL.  Hoping the coming NEW YEAR will lead you and your loved ones to reap the FRUITS of MORE BLESSINGS you each deserve😗😗😗

SCAMS Statistics Remain Unabated!

 

Even as we are all caught up in the midst of all these frenzied activities as part of our 2025 year-ender, it is understandable if some of us are focused OR getting lured for opportunities to work overseas, e.g. in Singapore, Dubai, etc.  BUT alas, these are those times WHEN the predators are lurking around for potential preys, and YES, figuring out those determined ones innocently scouring the job market😡😡😡

And NOT surprisingly, from the latest statistics, a plurality @43% of scams have targeted adults, YES adults and NOT teens.  WHY?  Because almost all adults are the responsible ones earnestly looking for job OR business opportunities.  And NOT to douse cold water on the most optimistic job seekers, in the Asia Pacific [APAC] Region, Singapore is the #1 country where job scammers have been operating, albeit incognito💧💧💧

The mother of all ironies is that despite the very high awareness & vigilance of Singaporeans with regard scams, latest statistics show that 96% of Singaporeans are worried about financial security and economic uncertainty, fueling that surge in SCAMS as consumers take greater risks online💥💥💥

Connecting the dots, data-driven statistics show that nearly 8 out of 10 Singaporeans are actively seeking promotions and discounts due to the prevailing higher consumer prices.  This makes them PRIME TARGETS for SCAMMERS WHO would lure them no end with fraudulent discounts a.k.a. vouchers.  Latest researches show the relationship between financial security and prevalent SCAM tactics in any country and market.  Experts claim that emotions are powerful psychological tactic that SCAMMERS often capitalize on❎❎❎

Our takeaway:  As numbers DON'T lie, allow me to share the latest SCAM statistics [with NO intention to scare our readership]: For those affected by JOB SCAMS [in Singapore], 40% discovered it only after losing a significant amount of monies.  As a year-ender challenge, can we mount a COUNTER-OFFENSIVE to these scammers by improving our VIGILANCE in the light of these unabated SCAMS😡😡😡

FLIPPING A COIN for Decisions?

 

FLIPPING A COIN for decisions?  Better NOT, dude!!! And IF it's NOT FLIPPING COINS, some even would initiate KAMPAIs out of sheer braggadocio.  BUT that keeps my head spinning endlessly because I CAN'T see either the head OR tail of any decision-making that hinges on simply FLIPPING A COIN.  Of course, in many cases, people DON'T literally FLIP A COIN but instead, WHEN something is up there hanging in the air, they will simply shrug off their should and would then manifest their [default] surrender to WHATEVER IT IS📗📙📘

The mother of ironies is that many researches through the years show that we humans are vulnerable to FLIPPING COIN because it tends to make us happier, that circumstance of giving it over to chance.  Ever heard of that age-old saying: "WINNERS NEVER QUIT AND QUITTERS NEVER WIN"?  YES, pithy statements like that stick around because they seem to sound 'ABOUT RIGHT'.  And WHEN we decide on something, it is with the intention that this action will maximize our expected utility.  In the shortest words, we're going to get something good out of it.  So, IF we quit, we'll be worse off❎❎❎

Admittedly, life is rarely that straightforward.  Problem is, at times, we tend to over-simply situations that are complex enough.  Still, changing courses is really daunting.  And the more consequential the decision becomes especially if it's a needle mover OR even a game-changer OR even a life-changing one.  And YES, many of us are NO strangers to a never-ending list of PROs and CONs.  And one way out of this is FLIPPING A COIN?  Researches show that the impact of a COIN toss on major life decisions find that those WHO made change from their current status quo] based on the toss's advice were more satisfied with their decision 6 months later and overall happier than those WHO did NOT change course.  BUT if change will make us happier, WHY FLIP COIN???

Psychologists then did dig dipper here and they concluded that our 'self preservation' instinct makes us abundantly cautious WHEN venturing into the unknown.  We're always in that 'evidence collection' mode.  And WHEN we're somewhere at the margins and boundary between two options, something as subtle as a TOSS COIN can be enough to sway us in one common direction BUT that's NOT the case though💧💧💧

And the experts coined this as the power of "RANDOM DECISION AIDS' and according to science, it works?  SO HOW?  Firstly, COIN FLIPPING saves us and does extricate us OUT OF PARALYSIS BY ANALYSIS mode.  We then delay making important decisions because we feel data are deficient, that we CAN'T make an informed decision.  WHAT IF there's more illuminating information right around the corner, if we just wait a little longer?  YES, flipping a COIN OR ROLLING A DICE do bypass that perceived need for more information by giving us a somewhat clear-cut direction to make a decision.  So, are you FLIPPING A COIN for your next decision😡😡😡

Yes, Comparison Matters BUT.....

 

YES, comparison matters BUT the big and huge MISS is that the comparison is being done wrongly because what boils down is that those comparisons should be baselined to our own selves.  HOW were we yesterday.  HOW will we be today.  And HOW will we be by tomorrow?  BUT the thing is, human evolution has indeed left us with the need for social validation.  We humans tend to seek improving our status, WHICH is well reflected in our ego, reputation and even our place in the hierarchy.  Apparently, today's world amplifies that COMPARISON.  Social media and all kinds of metrics drag us into COMPARISONs📗📙📘

BUT WHAT happened to our internal comparisons?  Wanting to surpass others and be validated can motivate us to achieve greater things, reaching greater heights BUT problems arise WHEN we sacrifice our values just to outdo others.  And WHEN we prioritize the external over the internal, psychologists claim that at that point, we tend to lose the very essence and instead end up handing over control of our life to others [which is pitifully ironical].  BUT in reality, the greatest satisfaction WON'T come from outperforming our neighbor, our friend, our colleague BUT it is from outperforming our very own selves💧💧💧

Here's a very basic question to us all.  WHO defines our own success?  WHO lays down the parameters and metrices to measure WHETHER we're successful OR not?  WOULD we rather be the best person in the world BUT everyone think you're the worst?  OR will be rather that worst person BUT everyone thinks we're the best?  Billionaire investor Warren Buffett was well quoted WHEN he said:  IF YOU LIVE BY EXTERNAL COMPARISON, YOUR AMBITIONS WILL BE SOCIETY's.  IF YOU LIVE BY INTERNAL COMPARISON, YOU DECIDE WHAT SUCCESS MEANS [and NOT OTHERS]💥💥💥

Instead, Warren Buffett advises us to reorient our lives toward internal comparison.  That way, success WON'T depend on WHAT others think.  NOR will it change with trends.  NOR can it be bought with tons and tons of LIKES from your social media followers.  And WHEN we live based on internal comparison, our only 'mission' then is to be a better person today than yesterday and look forward to be better tomorrow than today!!!

Our takeaway:  One solid complement to Warren Buffett runs this way:  One of the defining characteristics of Buffett is that he lives by his OWN SCORECARD.  It's NOT just that he does the right thing BUT that he does WHAT is right for him.  Swinging back to our own lives, it should NOT be that huge of an ASK that we should stop comparing ourselves to others BUT instead, let's set the bar and raise the bar based on HOW we performed yesterday versus HOW we perform today versus HOW we will fare come next day?  Raise the bar, you can, but your thresholds should be baselined from your last performance.  NOT bad to tighten things if WHAT matters most is our own self-improvement💚💛💜

How's Our Distractions Going?

 

Have we ever wondered WHY quite a few times [OR maybe many times] we're either experiencing slippages in our tasks to be done OR we're simply left behind in terms of timelines.  LIKE what's needed last month was hardly completed a month after?  LIKE the report due for client submission yesterday will only be sent a day after?  LIKE  a basic need at home gets bought only today after a heated domestic altercation📗📙📘

YET, the mother of ironies is that with technology having creeped into our daily lives, notifications and reminders are all over the place.  In the past, you've got to be seated in your office to receive those notif's.  OR if you're a senior executive, your P.A. would have plastered multiple, overlapping colored post-it notes around your work desk.  These days, you can still be snoring in bed BUT notif's would have harangued you❎❎❎

Despite all those tools and aids, coupled with your random thoughts, it's NOT surprising these days to hear someone being overwhelmed [call it BURIED] with a backlog of chores as everything else seem to slip through the backstage.  BUT hold on. DON'T be so fast to be guilty to blame yourself.  Studies show that more often, it's NOT really our fault because apparently, our brains are wired to chase every little shiny thing that crosses its path.  Apparently, our brain does NOT have that filtering mode yet???

BUT alas, there are some low-hanging fruits we can leverage on, to name a few:

• Those HIDDEN TIME KILLERS - Experts say that it takes 23 minutes to regain focus after being distracted, whew.  Can you imagine you're performing one task estimated to take 20 mins and every few minutes, your attention gets caught by those endless smartphone
• Those NEGATIVE EMOTIONS - WHEN those 'NEGA' stuff take over you, IT'S OVER
• Splitting your focus - MULTI-TASKING often holds up our progress as you tend to do one too many tasks [like Superman]

Rightfully, distractions should be the least of our concerns BUT in reality, it's one of the worst 'wild cards' hitting our lives day-by-day.  WHY?  Because, firstly, many of us are NOT consciously aware that those distractions is more than just a menage to our lives.  Secondly, for those WHO do recognize it, they simply shrug off their shoulders as it DOESN'T seem to matter at all.  And for those WHO are both aware and conscious of its impact, some of us would hardly lift a finger to RIGHT THE WRONG, so to speak.  So dude, HOW'S OUR DISTRACTIONS GOING???

Not Too Late To 'RIGHT THE WRONGS'

 

Allow me to share herein EN TOTO [from Medium.com] datelined 08.31.2025.  90% OF MEN WASTE THEIR PRIME YEARS DOING THIS [hold your breath folks, although the following extracts are NOT my own words, I fully subscribe to it because it CAN'T be farther from harsh realities [WHICH I was guilty before too].  Your 20s and 30s are the most dangerous decades of your life.  Your life comfort comes from the possession you keep instead of the chances you take💚💛💜

Most men spend those years [in their 20s and 30s]:

• CHASING CHEAP THRILLS
• SETTLING FOR MEDIOCRITY
• THE INTERRUPTIONS IN THEIR LIVES START TO DOMINATE THEIR ENTIRE EXISTENCE

From any dimension, sounds like a wake-up call.

The activities of watching watcing NETFLIX, playing video games and scrolling through endless content DON'T provide relaxation BUT instead steal away your time.

• People spend an average 2.5 hours each day on social media platforms, which amounts to 38 days of LOST TIME annually
• Every hour wasted is an hour stolen from your future

From Medium.com, here's the recommended FIX:

• Set a 'DISTRACTION BUDGET' to control your daily mindless content viewing to 30mins
• Replace scrolling with a skill [e.g. 1 hour of coding instead of 1 hour of TikTok]
  

PARTYING EVERY WEEKEND.  Oooops, hanging out at bars ISN'T 'LIVING'.  It's burning your prime energy on empty calories and hangovers😡😡😡

The FIX from Medium.com:  Adopt the 50/30/20
Rule.  Simply put:

• 50% of weekends:  REST and PLAN
• 30% socialize with a purpose [with mentors]
• 20%  let loose [BUT set spending/drinking limits]

Admittedly, many years back in my 20s/30s, I was one of those GUILTY ones but thankfully, in time, I came back ON-TRACK.  YES due, it's NOT late to RIGHT THE WRONGS!!!

Sure NOT, You're GOING FOR ALL THE MARBLES?

 

Sure NOT, you're GOING FOR ALL THE MARBLES?  Thing is, in our daily lives, WHEN we're running in that kind of 'autopilot' mode, it's nothing less than going through the motions, often leading us to get emotionally unstuck.  YES absolutely true, everyone of us does feel stuck in life at some point [admittedly, I got stuck in life more than just once before].  MAYBE from an unstimulating job.  MAYBE from an unfulfilling relationship.  MAYBE call it indifference.  UNTIL you ask yourself, WILL I GO FOR ALL THE MARBLES???

BUT here's the glimmer of hope.  We can stop that kind of feeling stuck by figuring out WHY you're feeling that way in the first place, right?  And thereafter, initiate some tweaks here and there, initiate initial  minor changes to improve yourself either mentally, emotionally OR even physically.  BUT before we get embroiled with this STUCK stuff, WHY do we get stuck in life?  Frankly, difficult times OR life's challenges can have you feeling like you've lost your sense of direction.  From NOT getting enough rest to facing that unprecendented Covid-19 Pandemic, burnout can make us feel stuck and unsure WHERE to run.  And WHO can blame us WHEN at times, we momentarily stop and ask ourselves:  WILL I GO FOR ALL THE MARBLES?  There's a wild card uncorked by recent researches WHEN they came up with that 'self-sabotaging' behaviors'❌❌❌

WHETHER it's about our career, our business forays OR even our relationships, psychologists claim that we sometimes engage in that unexpected 'self-sabotaging' behavior WHERE we end up doubting our self-worth and even capabilities.  To compound matters, WHEN we live with mental conditions like depressions OR anxiety, they may add up to our feeling of being stuck😡😡😡

WHAT surprised me was this coined question from the experts:  WHAT'S YOUR WHY?  According to the experts, without forging our own path, we could likely end up going with life's current , WHICH may lead to us getting stuck.  Call it situations that seem to be way beyond our control [and often times, we have used this as a ruse [more than that an excuse] that the situation was BEYOND OUR CONTROL and therefore, there was almost nothing you can do then.  Seriously?  WHEN we should empower ourselves to pick up oyur oars and map out our path BACK TO GREEN😀😀😀

Our takeaway:  YES and YES.  WHEN we kind of feeling stuck, that tells us to GO FOR ALL THE MARBLES.  WHY?  That's a situation WHERE, whatever we do, we just got NOTHING TO LOSE.  You may be focusing on your day by day WHICH in some cases is a great way to manage stress and yet, perspective is WHAT may help us to choose that path back on track.  In our project management practice, we call it the BACK TO GREEN plan [if your project status is either in AMBER OR RED].  So, dude, if you're GOING FOR ALL THE MARBLES, you know WHEN to go all-out for it!!!

Kensho, Anyone?

 

This is very new, very foreign to me, NOT until recently WHEN I stumbled across KENSHO, that ZEN Practice of seeing your true nature.  Before we ask if this makes sense today, do you ever feel like you just need your world shaken up a bit?  YES, sometimes this can indicate you need some kind of realization OR enlightenment in your life.  MAYBE things have been kind of dull and mundane OR that you generally feel kind of stalled OR 'stuck'?  OR perhaps you've recently undergone a big life change, a sea change in life OR maybe you've been on your own personal journey for some time now📗📙📘

To take a lift from the pages of Buddhism [WITHOUT really espousing Buddhism as a religion BUT more as a philosophy], the first ZEN experience of enlightenment is called KENSHO, which in Nihonggo, literally translates to "SEEING NATURE".  NOW, here are motherhood questions I myself initially asked myself:  SO, WHAT DOES THIS EXACTLY MEAN?  AND HOW CAN WE OBTAIN IT?  Kensho experts tell us that we often view ourselves as "I" and as a being separate from everything else and that a KENSHO experience involves the realization that there is really no "I" BUT instead, that the process of thinking brings forth the idea OR illusion of "I" as it derives from our own perceptions, feelings and memories💥💥💥

To borrow the exact words of KENSHO experts, it is defined as that 'ZEN EXPERIENCE OR ENLIGHTENMENT WHEN ONE'S OWN NATURE IS SEEN FOR WHAT  IT IS".  And we are told that once we've experienced it, we can further expand and grow upon it, leading to further enlightenment OR 'awakenings' so to speak.  I did exchange notes with those who practice Yoga and I heard many times that this experience usually arises after an intensive [and NOT a token one] meditation OR in the technical jargon of KENSHO experts, they coined it as "introspective practices".  However, some have said to have quick moments of realization leading to that enlightenment we hope no less💚💛💜

Despite all these coinages and jargons, let's dice and drill it into the simplest terms.  KENSHO can be best realized via its very three tenets and foundations namely:

• TEACHING - WHILE most of the teachings come from Buddhism, it is for us to practice and nurture it in our life journey
• PRACTICE - One of the most common practices on the path toward enlightenment OR KENSHO is meditation

Our takeaway:  Much as our communities are so deeply wired many levels deep, let us consider taking a pause, hitting the brakes and preferably lifting our car's handbrake if only we can find that time to take a deep breath, inch closer to nature, listen to the slightest ripples of peace and calmness as we search for that solitude and space to be with our own persona and find that most genuine enlightenment we deserve.  KENSHO anyone???

An Uphill Climb Can Lead To A Steep Descent

 

Nope sirrrrrs. I WON'T comment on that ill-fated Air India Flight from Ahmedabad to London where 241 out of 242 were killed.  BUT instead, let's take some time to look at our human inclinations of harnessing gravity for that speed and flow.  BUT again, conquering tough climbs takes more than just grit BUT the effort builds up the power needed even as it demands focus.  The biggest challenge we frequently face in life is HOW to stay safe [especially WHEN fatigue creeps in].  NOT known to many of us, the downside of UPHILL CLIMBS is that it can lead to a STEEP DESCENT, whoa💧💧💧

Unfortunately in our life, it takes  multiple [probably zillions] of rides that will constantly push us to our very limits so that's WHEN our endurance becomes the 'game changer' because the likelihood is we'll either succeed OR fail, depending as to HOW will the end result be.  And mastering those multiple rides that run through the most rugged terrain can be extremely challenging and anyone LESS prepared OR ill-trained to face those kinds of challenges will be having NO less than a doom-fated journey ahead.  True, every ride is a victory worth celebrating regardless WHETHER if it's a new path, a new distance, OR even just simply sticking AS PER PLAN💥💥💥

Very much akin to biking, building up that habit really takes time even as you gradually embed that level of discipline you need to ingraine deep within your own system.  And once you get acclimatize with the landscape, we are expected to have a better feel of the terrain, including its challenges and rewards, and even leading us to figure out the 'best lines' through those obstacles.  That concept of situational awareness, pattern recognition, decision-making and adaptability are the ingredients as we take that UPHILL CLIMB!!!

Without dampening our hopes, it is imperative that everyone is consciously aware of the pitfalls of that UPHILL CLIMB because in a worst case scenario, that may lead to a STEEP DESCENT.  Of course, I WON'T cite that ill-fated Air India flight from Ahmedabad to London as an example because that flight had hardly climbed up WHEN it suddenly went into a STEEP DESCENT, a tragedy that shatters logic and reason❎❎❎

Our takeaway:  Rather than having our spirits dampened by that threat of a STEEP DESCENT, psychologists have conceptualized that "UPHILL ADVANTAGE" which reminds us that even solo climbs [like those hikers to Mt Everest] can be transformative, ultimately making a person much stronger, a more capable leader once he reaches the crest.  True, he might be alone in that UPHILL CLIMB BUT the rewards will be unprecedented notwithstanding that very slim probability that IF and WHEN worse comes to worst, that UPHILL CLIMB can lead to a STEEP DESCENT.  BUT such is life.  LOW risk equates to LOW rewards while HIGH risk equates to HIGH rewards dude😌😌😌