Going Against The Tide WHEN IT'S NOT POSSIBLE

Going Against The Tide WHEN IT'S NOT POSSIBLE

Many years ago, I was feeling frustrated WHEN several things in my life DIDN'T seem to be progressing based on my own expectations [and timelines], as I'd hoped.  And that made me feeling like I was getting nowhere.  Those were 'simple truths' BUT to me they were deeply profound that, even in those trying moments, I was unable to confirm OR deny.  Instead, I felt they just are, and they shake you to your deepest core.  At hindsight, they usually begin as tiny passing thoughts BUT that will grow over time into an undeniable screaming in your head.  Fact is, they just CAN'T be ignored BUT WHAT pushed me was Going Against The Tide WHEN IT'S NOT POSSIBLE📗📙📘

BUT from beneath, I heard myself screaming loud enough to myself, that WHAT I was doing was NOT working and that was the time to try something different, albeit with NO guarantees that another try, another attempt will work out.  BUT in the context of working out, as well as many things, it was quite 'spot on'.  Much as I was pushing myself hard, some things were NOT just working. In short, I was NOT producing the results I expected and I was looking for so I got stomped and confronted myself, right in my eyes, this question:  WHY DO I INSIST TO CONTINUE DOING THE SAME THINGS OVER AND OVER [when I've proven wrong, when I was proven to have failed]💧💧💧

Indeed, this is a limited sampling of the SIMPLE TRUTHS wherein, indeed they're that SIMPLE.  And sometimes they may seem obvious BUT sometimes, we do get so wrapped up in working on things [THAT ARE NOT WORKING] and till the end, we just CAN'T figure out the obvious solution.  Thing is, IF IT'S NOT WORKING, TRY SOMETHING DIFFERENT [even as this means us going against the tide WHEN it's NOT possible]💦💦💦

BUT WHAT seems to be our biggest problem that seems to exist incognito?  It's that we are inundated with a damn ridiculous amount of information on the web, from friends and family, even neighbors, and even kibitzers.  Add the news and the overflowing social media, you have a ballgame at hand.  We're told to lose weight, to shape up, to grow a business, to raise a child in a thousand different ways by a million different people.  WHEN this happens, we feel overwhelmed and even lose touch with reality❎❎❎

Our takeaway:  In practical terms, WHEN things are proven to be NOT working, NOT workable:  ACKNOWLEDGE that it's NOT working.  NO judgement.  NO negativity. It DOESN'T work for you and that's ok.  And STOP TRYING TO MAKE IT WORK.  Just stop forcing things out.  Instead, TRY SOMETHING DIFFERENT.  And I take a leaf from my personal experiences.  I refuse to pounce my head on a concrete wall because that wall WON'T break.  Figure things out, pick up the pieces, and if you need to reset and reboot, JUST DO IT dude❗❗❗

The MORE You Take, The LESS You Have

The MORE You Take, The LESS You Have

Many of us will remember our childhood days WHEN we were taught to be thrifty and save save save in our piggy bank?  Until we became so over-protective of our piggy bank to a point WHERE, if we had siblings or other relatives in the same home, we [unconsciously] started to develop that NOT so good mindset of being over-protective of our piggy bank to a point WHERE we became suspicious in case someone else is dipping his hands into your piggy bank.  BUT today, what do we know? The MORE You Take, The LESS You Have📗📙📘

NOT in bad faith, you would develop that greediness till you yourself will feel it disgusting to a point you will end up embarrassed. WHAT do we learn from this?  THAT it DOESN'T have to be something you take entirely BUT instead, it is the intention that you DON'T want to give to other people that actually leads you to become LESS.  Years back, I learned this WHEN I heard well known philanthropists forking out monies left and right💥💥💥

Simply put, WHEN you try to get MORE out of life to satisfy your wishes, wants and unsatiable desires, BUT later on, you will tend to lose sight of WHAT TRULY MATTERS.  And likely, you might even lose yourself in the process, losing that 'REAL YOU'.  In the end, instead of being happy, you end up longing and wishing that you should have focused on the more important things around you and NOT to grab everything that comes your way😖😖😖

I learned this WHEN I witnessed countless well-meaning people NOT only shelling out resources BUT spending their time and exerting efforts to help others.  And with technology in our very own finger tips, we have seen many SMEs and experts willfully sharing their expertise, and that's for the entire world.  Then I realized and learned that they DIDN'T become poorer OR less than before after receiving those 'values' 💦💦💦

Our takeaway:  To this day, I firmly believe that WHEN we give something, I did NEVER become less.  I can attest to how one feels when the past months, we cleared our condominium unit of all the appliances and furniture, giving them all, lock, stock and barrel to our trusted handyman [in exchange for nothing, nada, nichts].  WHAT did I get in return?  A LOT, as in A LOT.  I feel more grateful for sharing my blessings.  I feel more accomplished for uplifting someone's plight.  I feel many notches a much better person than I used to be😀😀😀

Words Can NEVER Be Louder Than Action

Words Can NEVER Be Louder Than Action

A decade or two ago, the loudest noises came from the media, both print and TV.  That brought about the media conglomerates like Time-Warner, Disney, Rupert Murdoch's News Corporation.  Until the likes Netflix, Comcast, etc took over.  BUT alas, let us NOT envy them because those conglomerates DON'T have a monopoly of the action and noise in the world today.  Instead, it is the fact that Words Can NEVER Be Louder Than Action.  WHAT is quite typical these days is WHEN a person says one thing BUT does another thing.  WHAT do we do then?  Experts advise us that weight should be given to the subsequent action.  And that is based on the assumption that the behavior more accurately reflects the person's motivations and goals.  In such situations, we discount words as kind of a 'lip service'.  YES, we are all too familiar with empty promises📗📙📘

And the quite risky assumption in all these is that we can count only on people WHO deliver through behavioral action.  However, this interpretation of inconsistency, between WHAT one says and WHAT one does, is based on a belief that there is a freedom of choice with respect to one's words and one's actions.  Various studies did cover a focus on situations WHERE people's behavior is constrained through NO fault of their own and compares WHEN they can OR cannot speak.  WHEN the system prevents the high power player from contributing behaviorally, yet enables communication, we find that words mitigate the impact of selfish behavior💦💦💦

Extensive researches have shown that despite the selfish behavior of those WHO are either superior OR with power, low power members contribute to the group as well.  And in those situations, given the situational constraint on behavior words speak louder than actions.  Unfortunately, there are many situations WHERE those WHO have power are NOT able to immediately help those in need of resources.  BUT just because as the 'power holder' is NOT helping at the moment, does NOT mean they will NOT help in the future.  They may then be constrained at the moment, for one reason OR another.  Power may be reflected by other circumstances by then.  Unfortunately, there are many real-life situations WHERE we will be challenged to interpret situations.  And WHAT they say can guide your attributions and shape how you feel and act💧💧💧

Thing is, the words we choose are important.  The way we say those words matters too.  Our words can absolutely influence other people.  BUT here we go again, ACTION SPEAKS LOUDER THAN WORDS.  We can tell people WHAT a good leader, manager, father OR mother OR friend OR colleague should be OR we could show people through our behaviors.  YES we can wax lyrical about WHAT a good artist should be OR we can show the world our expertise and capabilities.  And we can even argue about which direction is right OR how a process should work OR WHAT a good business should look like OR we could simply do the work and work it out, then show people💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  YES we could tell people WHAT behaviors we'd like for our culture OR we could be a role model and showcase ourself to people.  BUT at the end of the day, our ACTIONS [and that includes our behavior and emotions] always speak louder than our words.  And WHEN we say one thing BUT do something else, we send a clear message [and unfortunately, that may not sending a good message].   WHEN we ask people to behave in a POSITIVE way and we do the opposite, we send a message.  YES, people will resent hypocrisy.   Thing is, WORDS CAN NEVER BE LOUDER THAN ACTION❗❗❗

How Often You Ride The BANDWAGON?

How Often You Ride The BANDWAGON?

For alignment, let's do a lookup of BANDWAGON EFFECT which is defined as that psychological phenomenon in WHICH people do something primarily because other are doing it, regardless of their own beliefs, WHICH they may [sometimes] ignore OR override.  So, How Often You Ride The BANDWAGON which is sometimes tagged as that HERD MENTALITY for that tendency of people to align their beliefs and behaviors with others📗📙📘

Let's look back into our daily lives.  Have you gotten into a hobby just because it seemed like everyone else was doing it?  Even if it's something you're NOT naturally drawn to, the sudden popularity might leave you wondering WHAT all the hype is all about.  Everyone else is doing it, so it must be worth doing it too?  REALLY?  Not too fast, dude.  It can leave you feeling like if you DON'T at least give it a try, you'll end up missing out on some important, shared cultural phenomenon.  So, WHAT explains this???

IF you've ever jumped on a trend, it's likely that you are manifesting either fear of missing out [FOMO], peer pressure, OR something else?   From a real-life perspective, that BANDWAGON effect is one reason WHY we often fall for short-lived trends.  It can affect our choices, in ways that can be both good and bad.  POSITIVE BANDWAGONs might inspire us to adopt healthy behaviors while NEGATIVE BANDWAGONs might lead us to try one questionable health advice OR spend money on things we DON'T need💧💧💧

Let's take a preview of the most common BANDWAGON effects happening across countries and cultures:

DIETs - WHEN everyone seems to adopt a specific diet, people are likely to try it themselves

FASHION - Fashion trends seem to be particularly vulnerable to the BANDWAGON EFFECT.  They also tend to be fleeting.  Just as one trend takes hold, others quickly become outdated and relegated to our closets💦💦💦

Our takeaway:  NEVER live your life by riding on the BANDWAGON [unless you are cocksure that that BANDWAGON is the best and most correct measure to go.  Looking back, I can humbly beat my chest and unequivocally affirm that NEVER I did ride on the BANDWAGON when life decisions had to be made.  If at all, it was during my teenage years WHEN I did succumb once or twice to that BANDWAGON.  Thereafter, I did bid adieu💥💥💥

Giving Up Something GOOD To Get Something GREAT

Giving Up Something GOOD To Get Something GREAT

Every calendar year, the NBA designates specific periods to open up the TRADE SEASON.  And for the non-hoopster, you might be wondering WHAT's the fuss?  This is all about Giving Up Something GOOD To Get Something GREAT.  In the NBA, the only constant is CHANGE and every time TRADE SEASON opens up, that's when the front office of the 30 teams would kickstart the 'horse trading' with the end view of Giving Up Something GOOD To Get Something GREAT📗📙📘

BTW, NBA teams WON'T be involved in trading players for lateral movement purposes.  And frankly, they WON'T trade a GOOD player for another GOOD player.  Instead, the bottom line is always to go from GOOD to GREAT.  NBA teams will go NOT just for a fish. They go WHALE-hunting, in fact/ Swinging over to our lives, the same mantra applies in our lives.  If you dwell in a U.S. mobile home, you WON'T dream moving to another mobile home.  If you're driving a 1.0 liter-powered car, you WON'T dream for car on the same league💧💧💧

If we have great personalities like Nelson Mandela, Steve Jobs and Oprah Winfrey, they were recognized as great ones NOT because they were hyped OR over-hyped.  It's because in their own right, they achieved things that were way beyond the realm of the good ones.  In fact, they are blue-chip BIG LEAGUE greats whose achievements should NOT even be debated on.  The question is, moving on to our lives, can we embrace that mantra of GIVING UP SOMETHING GOOD TO GET SOMETHING GREAT???

Throughout my lifetime, one of my favorite things to do is dream about the future.  It's exciting to think about the possibilities that it holds and WHAT new and exciting things we'll get to experience.  Having a dream helps you to create and set goals and having those goals help you to achieve them.  Imagine IF you are so capable and energized BUT you got zero goals?  So, you've got a great idea, create your goals especially if leads you to go from GOOD to GREAT no less💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  WHEN an idea pops-up, DON'T ignore it, DON'T miss it out.  At the very least, give it a thought like, WILL THAT MOVE ME FROM BEING GOOD TO BECOMING GREAT?  Weigh in things.  If it will probably come out as a lateral move, WHY do it in the first place?  OR if there are attendant risks that may even cause you a setback, WHY take that plunge if that is NOT a WIN-WIN proposition for you?  Dude, let us GIVE UP SOMETHING GOOD [only] TO GET SOMETHING GREAT, period❗❗❗

What Feeds Into Your Brain Goes Out

What Feeds Into Your Brain Goes Out

There's this boring riddle from the bake shop which tells and asks us, IF I PUT A PAN OF COOKIES IN THE OVEN TO BAKE,WHEN I PULL THE PAN, WILL I HAVE A CAKE?  Of course, absolutely NOT, that was so obvious.  What Feeds Into Your Brain Goes Out,  in fact.  And that is exactly true in our lives.  WHAT we put in will have a powerful effect on WHAT we believe and WHAT we do.  BUT dude, this is NOT all about controlling our mind.  Maybe we want to stop thinking about a recent foul-up at work.  OR we flopped in a missed major sales opportunity and we thought it's the end of things📙📘

BUT the thing is, unwanted thoughts can indeed cause plenty of frustration [and even stress, NOT to mention distress].  And you're NOT alone in wanting to make them go away.  It's just normal to have trouble convincing oneself to look up WHEN feeling downcast in the face of stress and other steep challenges.  BUT while actual mind control belongs in the realm of science fiction, we can work to change our mindset, right???

So, HOW can we move forward?  Psychologists tell us to identify our thoughts which we want to change in the first place.  It goes without saying that you have to figure out WHAT'S on your mind before you can even begin to control it.  And nearly everyone experiences discouraging thoughts OR even emotional setbacks from time to time.  That's just a given.  And if you're currently experiencing some of life's challenges, you might even find it even harder to maintain control over things that seem to be spiraling thoughts OR even clouding your mindset.  BUT experts do assure us that occasional 'INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS' are pretty normal, so that does NOT trigger the alarm bells [yet]💧💧💧

BUT before we feel so overwhelmed [and swamped over], experts do counsel us to accept even those unwanted thoughts because it is indeed human nature to flinch away from pain, so of course you would prefer to avoid thoughts that seem to [potentially] cause distress [and even stress].  YET let's face it, pushing away unwanted thoughts ISN'T the way to gain control because that's usually just makes them more intense instead.  So, WHAT's the antidote?  Experts advise us to accept those thoughts, and LET THEM IN, period.  Like, say you feel a little low because NOTHING in your life seems to be happening the way you planned despite all the hard work you poured💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  WHILE acceptance might involve telling yourself 'NOTHING SEEMS TO BE GOING RIGHT [and that's discouraging], there's only so much you can do to create that change for yourself BUT giving up entirely ISN'T the answer either because acceptance can even offer clues as to WHY specific thoughts keep rushing back OR coming up.  MAYBE, you keep thinking alongside your fears, worries, apprehensions and the like.  OR  you may be brimming with optimism.  WHERE you're pessimistic, that can push you down to your downfall.  WHERE you're optimistic, that will push your chances up.  YES dude, WHAT FEEDS INTO YOUR BRAIN GOES OUT❗❗❗

When Is MULTITASKING Effective?

When Is MULTITASKING Effective?

Everyone says [and I believe almost everyone of us do agree] that trying to do two things at once is usually a recipe for doing both things either badly OR wrongly.  WHY?  Because researches proved that we're slower and less accurate WHEN we try to juggle two things. Hence, the constant advice we've been receiving is to avoid MULTITASKING.  So, When Is MULTITASKING Effective???

BUT here we go, shifting gears to reverse [albeit conditionally].  BUT if giving up MULTITASKING ISN'T an option, psychologists recently offered a glimmer of hope that our ability to MULTITASK may depend on WHETHER we are trained to do the tasks separately OR simultaneously.  BUT again, that advice seems like a trap game unless we are more incisive.  So, recent researches tell us that indeed, some things just DON'T go according to plan [and there's nothing we can do about it].  We may even find that we need to double up our activities just to get it all done.  In that case, MULTITASKING may still seem feasible [and proven to work effectively] in either of the following scenarios💧💧💧

First scenario will be WHEN you're NOT working on something too complex and you can handle a brief and even minor interruption [like opening the door when the buzzer sounds while you're shaving OR grooming].

Second scenario will be WHEN one of the tasks is something you practically do on autopilot, like walking on a treadmill OR brushing your teeth

BUT experts qualify that beyond these two scenarios, MULTITASKING is [STILL] NOT recommended

Like if you're listening to an audiobook while you run OR calling [handsfree] your mom while you drive, then that's fine, as long as you've run OR driven so much that it's pretty much second nature. Still, anything that makes it complex, like unexpected road construction OR a stretch of street lights going out, can suddenly turn the task into an unfamiliar one, and that's WHEN MULTITASKING WON'T work as well💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  To the best of your ability, AVOID doing it altogether OR getting into MULTITASKING.  I remember learning about the POMODORO Technique in the past WHEREIN you set your timer for 25 minutes and focus on a single task until the timer rings.  WHEN your session ends, mark off that task as COMPLETED.  Then, enjoy a five-minute break.  After completing four tasks, take a longer, more restorative 15-30 minute break. In short, the best advice is still to avoid MULTITASKING whenever possible.  BUT for those WHO have to do it, consistent context matters.  BTW, let's count in MULTITASKING only on EXCEPTION BASIS, please❗❗❗

Why 'NO SHOWs' Are Penalized?

Why 'NO SHOWs' Are Penalized?

Good question. Why 'NO SHOWs' Are Penalized?  More often than NOT, if we're a NO SHOW in our confirmed flight, we would be penalized at the very least [the extent of which depends on our ticket's RESTRICTIONS].  BUT no sirrrrs, we'll NOT waste our thread today for a discourse about flight bookings.  Instead, we'd like to focus on those 'NO SHOWS' in life to which we are directly culpable and responsible in the first place📗📙📘

YESSSSSSS, it's damn true.  As this poster says, SOMETIMES ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS SHOW UP.  And that truism can't be debunked even in situations WHERE you were perceived to have a china man's chance to eke it out.  This is WHERE I appreciate the fortitude of Third World populations WHERE we will witness mile-long queues for water, food provisions, for financial assistance.  And in most cases, as long as you SHOW UP [even if that is a long-winded queue], there is a good chance that you will receive some 'manna from heaven', whatever it may be😊😊😊

Speaking broadly, SHOWING UP is how we present ourselves to the world.  Yes, it brings urgency to our lives.  And to quote psychologists' jargon, the two core components are knowing ourselves and engaging in conscious preparation rather than just assuming your best self OR expertise will shine through.  Supposedly, it should be the most straight-forward thing in the world, YET failing to truly SHOW UP is the root of WHY so many people DON'T get WHAT they want in life💧💧💧

In my life, I embraced this JSUP [JUST SHOW UP] mantra and WHILE I admit that sometimes I fell short of my goals and objectives, as long as I am able to justify that shortfall [to myself] , then I'm fine.  Over time, I admit that I made it as my discipline and my mission to get to the bottom of WHY people DON'T really SHOW UP because it's just despicable, besides regrettable for wasting an opportunity💦💦💦

Our takeaway:  Many things in life we CAN'T control BUT if there's one thing we can, it is SHOWING UP.  Every day.  Every moment WHICH you considered and planned.  That's about it. SHOWING UP ISN'T a silver bullet.  True, it is NOT an easy win. It is NOT a lifehack either.  And it is NEVER a shortcut.  BUT it's the only way of building up anything.  The harsh truth is that, more often than NOT, most of us are too focused on INSTANT wins.  INSTANT gratifications.  We're too focused on breaking out.  We expect every single piece of content we make to spread like wildfire [like in those unfortunate Australian bushfires] and we get discouraged WHEN that DOESN'T happen.  All these explain as to why 'NO SHOWS' are penalized💥💥💥

Everything Happens For A Reason [SERIOUSLY]

Everything Happens For A Reason [SERIOUSLY]

Everything Happens For A Reason [SERIOUSLY].  Is this worth our talking point today?  Absolutely dude.  True, failures and losses are inevitable.  No one wears teflon clothes to be immune and protected from such.  BUT trying to rationalize them can and should be the last thing that you should [EVER] do, if at all.  WHICH brings us back to that 'BUTTERFLY EFFECT' by American mathematician Edward Lorenz📗📙📘

There's this historical paradox in American history wherein history tells us that America won the revolutionary war because of a mistake by German Colonel Johann Roll [who was busy playing poker that time].  Apparently, WHEN he received George Washington's instructions to attack, he ignored it and instead continued playing poker.  Alas, America won and ironically, even Johann Roll was NEVER aware of the consequences of his INACTION [which changed history, whew]💦💦💦

WHAT's the insight we can pick from here?  It's that REALITY just kicks in the same manner WHEN dominoes fall WHEREIN WHAT falls will touch another and everything falls from thereon.  WHAT does this tell us?  it's that our life is no less than an INTERCONNECTION between the past, present and future.  WHAT happens right now is absolutely influenced by the past.  Unfortunately, often we DON'T understand WHY until WHAT comes next.  BUT the past always has valuable lessons.  Heard of those touching stories WHERE a child is a woman's child from her second [and latest relationship].  So, we can imagine, if that mom did NOT break up with her 'exes' in the past, although that was sad and depressing, that latest child now [from her second relationship would NOT have been born]💧💧💧

So, indeed, everything has a reason behind it.  BUT it DOESN'T mean we can just let things happen.  Instead, we should give our best today as the reason WHY tomorrow should be better.  Makes sense, right?  The thing is, even those small, minute changes do matter.  Like, we can choose either to slack off OR do five push-ups every day.  Either of these options will impact that upcoming reality💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  True we have our respective destinies BUT everything has a REASON behind it.  YES, we got to embrace our current reality and DO YOUR BEST no less because our BEST DAYS AREN'T yet to come if we plan to make them so.  To quote American novelist Jay Asher:  IF A BUTTERFLY FLAPS ITS WINGS AT JUST THE RIGHT TIME IN JUST THE RIGHT PLACE, IT CAN CAUSE A HURRICANE THOUSANDS OF MILES AWAY.  IT'S ABOUT HOW A TINY CHANGE IN A BIG SYSTEM CAN AFFECT EVERYTHING.  Yes dude, EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON [Seriously]😊😊😊

Getting Started Is ALL WHAT IT TAKES!

Getting Started Is ALL WHAT IT TAKES!

All along, we always hear from both our ears is that SUCCESS is WHAT MATTERS.  And there's the catch.  WHAT is more often overlooked is that SUCCESS is NOT the end of things that MATTER most.  In fact, Getting Started Is ALL WHAT IT TAKES.  Problem is, the tough world we live in is becoming more and more obsessed with comparison and validation.  The style of thinking that is becoming dangerously common is "IF YOU CAN'T BE #1 OR #2, THEN YOU MIGHT AS WELL NOT PLAY AT ALL"📗📙📘

In the world of competitive sports, the success stories tell us that you DON'T need to be at that professional level to learn the most important lessons in your field.  Bluntly, you just need to 'BUST YOUR BUTT' regardless of the level you're playing at.  And frankly, it's that same way in the rest of life as well.  BTW, mastering your craft ISN'T nearly as important as pushing yourself every step of the way💥💥💥

WHAT gets overlooked [over and over again] is that it's much more important to START than to SUCCEED.  This is NOT to downplay to eventually SUCCEED in our journey.  BUT WHAT if the choice to be curious was all that was required to become smarter, stronger and more skilled, WHAT if the willingness to try something new [EVEN IF it felt uncomfortable, was all that it took to start the slow march towards 'greatness'?  Common questions we need to ask ourselves could be as follows:

• Are you willing to be vulnerable and put your skin in the game to kickstart your own plans?
• Are you eager enough to improve your work that you'll battle through the frustration of producing something mediocre?
• Are you curious enough to get in the gym even if you look silly?

Again, it all boils down to this.  WHETHER you'll end up being the best OR the worst, are you willing to START? And whenever I deep-dive into this thread, the more I believe that the willingness to start is the littlest thing in life that makes the biggest difference.  Frankly, let us jump straight into the fray, step into the field, stand up in a meeting [even if that's a crowded room meeting], raise your hand in class, get under the bar, walk up to the podium, ask the very first question.  Take that calculated risk, get started and contribute something.  To your team, to your family, to your job, to your community, WHETHER OR NOT you end up being #1 in the world is irrelevant❎❎❎

Our takeaway:  Let's call a spade a spade.  Life ISN'T a dress rehearsal.    Sometimes I do write about WHAT it means to live a healthy life.  And I CAN'T think of any skill more critical to the active pursuit of a healthy life than the willingness to START.  Everything that signifies a happy, healthy and fulfilled existence [e.g. strong relationships, valuable work, etc], it all requires a willingness to get started over and over again.  A blunt statement: Being the BEST ISN'T required to be happy OR fulfilled BUT being in the game is WHAT matters most ASAP😀😀😀