Breaking Bad Habits

Breaking Bad Habits

QUESTION: WHY is it so [damn] hard Breaking Bad Habits?  Simple logic tells us that if you know something is BAD for you, WHY CAN'T you just stop it?  A year-on-year survey says that approximately 70 percent of smokers say they would like to quit.  Drug and alcohol abusers struggle to give up addictions that hurt their bodies and tear apart families, friendships and even relationships.  And many of us have unhealthy excess weight that we could lose if only we would eat right and exercise more.  So, WHY DON'T we do it?  Everywhere, psychologists have been searching for answers and some researchers studied as to WHAT happens in our brains as habits form📗📙📘

And indeed, they found clues as to WHY BAD HABITS, once established, are so [damn] difficult to 'kick out'.  And according to these experts, understanding the 'biology' of HOW we develop routines that may be harmful to us and HOW to break those routines and embrace new ones, could help us change our lifestyles and adopt healthier behaviors💥💥💥

YES YES YES, HABITS can arise through repetition.  And this runs true way beyond humans.  DON'T look too far because even our pet animals around develop their own HABITS way after they have been trained, through repetition no less.  And indeed, most of our HABITS are a normal part of life and often helpful.  Waking up every morning, taking shower, combing your hair, brushing teeth, those are part of our core HABITS💦💦💦

We can even drive along familiar routes on 'mental auto-pilot' without really thinking about the directions.  So, WHEN behaviors do become automatic, it gives us that advantage because the brain does NOT have to use conscious thought to perform the activity.  This considerably frees up our brains for it to focus on different things instead.  BTW, HABITS can also develop when good or enjoyable events trigger the brain's 'reward' centers❗❗❗

Our takeaway:  If there is a culprit in all these HABITS, blame it to that chemical called DOPAMINE.  Because this explains WHY it is [damn] difficult and harder to break from pleasure-based HABITS. If you do something over and over again, and DOPAMINE is there WHEN you're doing it,and that strengthens the HABIT even more.  And WHEN you're NOT doing those things, DOPAMINE creates that 'craving' to do it again.  This explains WHY some people 'crave' for drugs even if that drug NO longer MAKES them feel particularly good once they take it.  In a sense, then, parts of our brains are working against us WHEN we attempt to overcome such BAD HABITS.  BUT the good news is that we humans have many more 'BRAIN REGIONS' to help us do WHAT's best for us.  After all, BREAKING BAD HABITs is not a tall order😃😃😃

NO Confidence? NO Problem!

NO Confidence?  NO Problem!

NO Confidence?  NO Problem!  Not too long ago, if you DON'T have that confidence within you, that's it, you're DONE, you're SCRATCHED, you're marked 'X'.  BUT that was the old school of thought.  Today, that DOESN'T hold water at all.  BUT let's align and accept on some GIVENs.  Building SELF-CONFIDENCE is NO mean feat.  It is NOT that easy OR simple.  Although some people appear to be so naturally CONFIDENT, most of us struggle with feeling CONFIDENT in our appearance, our abilities OR in any facet of our life📗📙📘

Regardless, it is essential to recognize WHEN and IF this situation is manifesting OR already happening because it has to be 'ACTIONED'.  Low CONFIDENCE can harm our happiness and well-being, one of those being a decrease in one's self-esteem.  Surprisingly, low SELF-CONFIDENCE could be manifesting even WHEN you feel like you CANNOT do the things you want OR need to do.  WHETHER you dream of travelling OR the world, achieving your dream career, finding a loving relationship OR going back to school💥💥💥

In any of these personal aspirations, LOW SELF-CONFIDENCE can get in the way of achieving these goals and aspirations.  If you frequently underestimate your ability to make your desires come true, that feeling of inadequacy likely stems from issues revolving around confidence.  Problem is, sometimes, these feelings manifest in ways that make us feel like NO matter how hard we try.  We will NEVER be good enough.  BUT there are some ways to counter any of these NEGATIVE feelings or manifestations.  Experts in psychology advise us of COGNITIVE BEHAVIORAL therapy which is a form of retraining our thoughts and replacing the NEGATIVE thoughts with POSITIVE ones💦💦💦

Concrete example is WHEN you feel like you should NOT go on a social outing because you will make things awkward, replace that thought with something along the lines of "I AM A VALUABLE AND INTERESTING PERSON AND MY FRIENDS ARE EXCITED FOR ME TO GO WITH THEM".  The idea is, the more we catch these thoughts and correct them, the more our mind will automatically gravitate toward them in the future.  And how's this.  HOW often you feel worried as to WHAT other people will think of you?  True, we CAN'T always please everyone all the time.  It is that implausible that you will go through life and NOT meet at least one person who does NOT get along with you, that scenario is beyond impossible❎❎❎

Our takeaway:  It is harmful to place our worth on WHAT other people think of us.  A sign of low CONFIDENCE is if you care more about WHAT outside people think of you than WHAT you care more about WHAT you know and think of yourself.  Sadly, this way of thinking can lead to other problems such as anxiety and the need to change yourself to suit different people's expectations.  WHAT we need to realize is that if you DON'T have CONFIDENCE, NO problem😁😁😁

[As Much As Possible] DON'T Use Mobile Phones For Major Purchases

[As Much As Possible] DON'T Use Mobile Phones For Major Purchases

I'm NOT a techie SME but we hope you DON'T take this sharing with a grain of salt.  If you've been spending time online, probably you have stumbled across comparisons of 'laptop purchases' versus 'phone purchases'.  BTW, there is NOTHING intrinsically wrong if you use your phone even for major online purchases [if that is your only option left?  LIKE being stranded in the middle of Maldives OR Seychelles BUT [As Much As Possible] DON'T Use Mobile Phones For Major Purchases📗📙📘

Again, UNLESS/EXCEPT if your phone is your online device in your everyday life and you need to initiate an online purchase of a new home appliance as you have just moved-in your new flat located at the fringes of the countryside and all you have is your phone for an online purchase?  Now, for some practical and solid reasons WHY you should favor the laptop over your phone for major online purchases:  For obvious reasons, the bigger screen makes it easier to flip between browser tabs to compare prices and so on💧💧💧

True if you've been using phones 99% for every single aspect in your life, you're most comfortable with phones BUT here's the undeniable thing:  You're NOT getting all the information on a single screen which you can see and get from a laptop OR desktop.  And for obvious reasons, WHEN making a major purchase, more information works to your advantage before you make an informed decision.  BTW, before retailers will whack me, one reason retailers would actually love it if we use our phones due to the term 'FRICTION'💥💥💥

To simply FRICTION, imagine all the Xtra steps and open windows that slow down your online purchase process and IF you've ever had your finger twitch at the wrong moment and you wound up buying the wrong seats for a Taylor Sift concert as an example, you would realize how important that FRICTION can be.  NOW, this gets interesting.  Another reason a laptop is a better choice for a major purchase is 'DRIP PRICING', remember that initial advertised price WHICH looks extremely attractive✅✅✅

Our takeaway:  Observe the DRIP DRIP DRIP pattern how the initially very low price slowly ramps up for every single ADD-ON, amenity OR adjustment adding to the cost [often BEHIND THE SCENES].  And yes, people tend to make the WORST spending decisions when dealing with DRIP pricing strategies.  Lastly, and this is a huge trap.  When we use our phone for purchases, we are also fighting against the ingrained way we tend to use phones because as we use phones more casually [versus laptops/desktops], we are prone to DISTRACTIONS.  That subtle difference may impact how well we FOCUS when making online purchases.  At the end of the day, it's your decision which device to opt for, as long as you end up with a correct, informed online purchase.  TO BE FOREWARNED IS TO BE FOREARMED❗❗❗

Containing Struggles In Life

Containing Struggles In Life

It is hard to accept and swallow BUT the fact is, STRUGGLING is an important phase of our lives.  Fact is, we need to face STRUGGLES to improve our love, ourselves and learn from it.  Without it, it is just an illusion of a comfort zone.  Most of us have experienced STRUGGLING in life OR maybe you are going through it right now.  BUT that is the least you should regret because psychologists say that is a 'GOOD PHASE' but it's true, it is NOT a comfortable phase to live in.  Yes we know it, WHEN we're STRUGGLING, we are trying to get out of that rut and make your life better BUT WHAT's the benefit of STRUGGLING in the first place?  Yes, STRUGGLES help us become aware of our own situation.  This is all about us  Containing Struggles In Life📗📙📘

Let's paint a typical scenario.  Most of the time, we just enjoy our lives without being present.  We just think that this day is just another ordinary and comfortable day WHILE life is NOT always like that.  STRUGGLING is giving you awareness that the situation you are in right now is NOT right OR uncomfortable.  It might give you a sign that you need to get out of this right now because it needs to be improved💢💢💢

WHAT we often lose sight is the reality that all these STRUGGLES are an important key as we are being built to become stronger [compared to WHAT we are and WHERE we stand at that point of the STRUGGLES].  BUT the problem is, many of us [and that includes me at some points in the past], we seem to have that [misguided] belief in us that we are STRONG ENOUGH BUT try to read the real score, we could be far off from it💦💦💦

WHY?  Generally, it is because we always end up the need to face the limits of our very own STRENGTH.  Sadly, sometimes we have that misguided belief in ourselves.  BUT hey dude, if there is any guarantee we are entitled in life, it is the fact that we, you, everyone else CAN'T avoid STRUGGLES.  This explains WHY it is imperative to know that STRUGGLING is a good thing in life because it might be a sign that you are being built to become stronger [than WHAT YOU ARE now]💥💥💥

Problem is, NOT many people can deal with their personal STRUGGLES and end up becoming even much worse than before.  Other than that, there are people WHO can deal with their struggles and find a happy life as an aftermath.  They would eventually succeed OR overcome their failures and STRUGGLES they face.  This is actually WHAT we all wanted, WHICH is a GOOD ENDING.  Having said that, the price of a GOOD ENDING is still quite a steep price NOT 'cheap' enough from any perspective.  BUT the thing is, we need to pay for that price, regardless if it is NOT that 'cheap'.   This explains WHY people need to consider CONTAINING STRUGGLES IN LIFE❗❗❗

Monk Mode, Anyone?

Monk Mode, Anyone?

First off, what is MONK MODE?  This gained its popularity on platforms like TikTok is, at its core, a productivity-hack inspired by Zen-like focus of monks.  This personal development trend took off on TikTok last year with #monkmode racking up more than 77 million views.  Monk Mode, Anyone? So, MONK MODE is all about embracing principles like mindfulness, minimalism, and purposeful work. The idea is to unplug from the usual chaos and focus on WHAT truly matters by giving yourself yourself permission to concentrate on a task at hand📗📙📘

It's true that we all live in an extremely hyper-connected world [and ironically, WHEN we get hit with an internet OR power outage, it's like the end-of-the world], so it's no longer surprising that we get constantly bombarded with distractions.  Can we imagine reading a book while in the middle of Japan's Shibuya Crossing?  OR New York's Time Square?  OR Jakarta's Monas roundabout?  No way, Jose❗❗❗

So, WHAT's this craze all about MONK MODE?  As this is entirely new to me, let me take a leaf from what I do read.  That MONK MODE offers a respite from all the chaos that keeps challenging us.  That MONK MODE gives us the ability to set aside time for deep work and reflection.  And WHILE many are using it to simply ignore distractions and embraced a focused work instead, others find it helpful to give up bad habits such as drinking alcohol, eating junk food, getting hooked with drugs OR even getting 'hostaged' by social media💥💥💥

And according to the strong advocates of MONK MODE, this is NOT just a productivity hack BUT instead, a lifestyle change [drastic as it may be] that encourages us to be more intentional with our time.  And to the advocates, MONK MODE is akin to putting our brain on a high-performance cleanse as it strips away all possible distractions even as it sharpens our focus and even boosts our self-confidence😀😀😀

Our takeaway:  Surely, just at that tipping point WHEN you stumbled across the word 'MONK' you might have blurted out like, "I'M NOT A BUDDHIST" but hey dude, this is NOT about religion or faith at all.  This is simply embracing the best of both worlds, adopting the best practices which, by coincidence, MONKs are most noted for.  So, let's take a pulse check.  MONK MODE, ANYONE???

WHY Texting Is NOT The Best Communications?

WHY Texting Is NOT The Best Communications?

WHY Texting Is NOT The Best Communications?  If there's one noise I've been very vociferous throughout the years is the fact that SMS stands for Short Messaging Service and YET hundreds of millions of people are using SMS for "LMS purposes" [for LONG MESSAGING purposes] which is way off track.  Through the years, I noticed on first hand basis that majority of people use SMS to discuss [OR even argue] unresolved issues NOT only within the workplace BUT even amongst relationships.  Can we believe that?  SMS is the channel to resolve 'unresolved' issues?  Of course I am impressed with people who have that digital dexterity to carry on a reasonably coherent text dialogue for longer than two minutes.  BUT, personal challenges aside, I strongly believe that texting via SMS is NOT the way to negotiate OR resolve issues📗📙📘

As texting via SMS seems to have evolved as the second nature to a generation reared on iPhones and smartphones, it is worth noting that human beings were designed and destined to connect with each other on mutifarious levels.  Interestingly, psychologists opine that 58 percent of communications is via body language, 35 percent through vocal tone, and emphasis and a mere 7 percent through the content of a message like SMS.  And we all agree [I am guessing] that good communications is the very cornerstone for relationships to endure over time.  So, WHY attempt to resolve a disagreement using only 7 percent of your full expression potential???

Let's have analogies here.  Would you run a marathon with 7 percent of your physical strength OR take an important test with 7 percent of your intelligence?  Would you host a holiday gathering with only 7 percent of your house cleaned?  BTW, that's already a generous 7 percent.  Consider all the annoying slips of the finger that can interfere with clearer communications.  WHEN the difference between "sad" OR "bad" and "glad" is an errant thumb, wobbly finger gymnastics can be that 'costly' and worse, confusing!!!

To be fair, let's hear from the iGen's and GenX's.  To them, typing a phone number into the seldom-used CALL APPs on the mobile phone is an anxiety-inducing task, let alone having to hold a conversation.  Instead, WHAT do we hear from these latest generations?

I HATE PHONE CALLS  BECAUSE IT MAKES ME FEEL MORE ANXIOUS

VIA SMS, AT LEAST I'M IN WRITING AND i HAVE TIME TO THINK ABOUT HOW TO REPLY AND WHAT TO SAY

EVEN IF I MAKE A PHONE CALL, I WILL STILL TAKE A POST-IT NOTE

Hey, WHY put oneself through such hassle when phone calls are simple DIAL-and-TALK affairs💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  Now, let's hear from their own perspective as to why they shy off from SMS.

• TO AVOID REVEALING VULNERABLE EMOTIONS.  NO ONE CAN HEAR YOUR TREMBLING VOICE IN A TEXT MESSAGE
• TO PROTECT ONESELF FROM HAVING TO HEAR ANOTHER PERSON'S STRAINED VOICE, E.G. ANGER, CRYING etc
• TO HAVE CONTROL OVER THE CONVERSATION, LIKE SETTING BOUNDARIES WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE

So, WHY can't we stop SMS as a default!@#$%?

Say Goodbye to BURNOUT!

Say Goodbye to BURNOUT!

NOT sure if BURNOUT is still part of today, no thanks to our iGen and GenZ generations because they are living their live around the clock, literally speaking.  NOT until one gets hit with BURNOUT.  And that is a consequence we will all face, like it or NOT.  BUT when can we Say Goodbye to BURNOUT?  YES dude, you can say adieu to BURNOUT now because that is myth proven to be hurdled and at best, even avert and avoid if we consciously embrace the need to pre-empt BURNOUT📙📗📘

Our human dilemma is that for the past century, people have talked a lot about anxiety, depression and burnout.  More accurately, these issues that have been affecting the human population since the beginning of time have gained more light as people removed the stigma about mental health issues and started talking about it😌😌😌

Admittedly, we've all [and that includes moi in the past] been struggling with this at one point OR another, whether it's obvious OR not, OR whether we want to admit it OR not.  Even to ourselves.  BUT there are little moments, here and there, WHERE we seem to be crippled with anxiety, fear, lack of stability OR simple mental exhaustion.  BURNOUT can happen to anyone routinely exposed to high levels of stress [and that's NOT limited even in a toxic workplace because there are equally toxic household environments that become the sort of breeding ground for the various levels of stress.  Problem is, it can cause symptoms of exhaustion, depression and isolation.  Yes, BURNOUT is a state of mental and physical exhaustion that can zap the joy out of you💦💦💦

Unfortunately, highly frequent exposure to stressful situations [even like caring for an ill family member, working long hours, or witnessing upsetting news related to either family life, health or safety can all lead to that stressful condition.  BURNOUT, however, ISN'T always easy to spot, that's the bigger challenge.  With that in mind, we need to be aware if we are potentially leading towards BURNOUT and be aware of its most common symptoms, at the very least💥💥💥

Before getting into proactiveness and subtle countermeasures to BURNOUT, let's be aware of these most obvious symptoms:  exhaustion, isolation, irritability, frequent illness, amongst others.  Our takeaway:  BURNOUT is NOT akin to a 'big bang' thing.  It will unravel in phases like DENIAL, WITHDRAWAL, BEHAVIORAL CHANGES, EMPTINESS and even DEPRESSION.  BUT by being incisive and sharp with these tell-tale signs, we can SAY GOODBYE TO BURNOUT❗❗❗

That Allure Of the New

That Allure Of the New

We all keep saying that life is too short, grudges are a waste of time, so laugh WHEN you can, apologize WHEN you must, and let go of WHAT CAN'T be changed, love WHAT you've got and always remember WHAT you have today.  Yet what's That ALLURE OF THE NEW?  Sometimes [OR probably many times] in our life, our human frailty is to be lured by the ALLURE OF THE NEW but WHAT explains that in the first place???

On the other hand, some say that life is like a flickering flame of candle.  WHEN the flame is snuffed out, the light is gone forever.  They believe that WHEN we breathe our last breath, we are totally extinguished, AS IF we had never been.  Hence, that pressing reason for us to CHERISH THE PRESENT rather than be lured by the ALLURE OF THE NEW.  Allow me to quote an unknown writer: 'I PASS THIS WORLD BUT ONLY ONCE, ANYTHING THAT I CAN DO, OR ANY KINDNESS THAT I CAN SHOW, LET ME DO IT NOW .  LET ME NOT DEFER IT FOR I SHALL NOT PASS THIS WAY AGAIN'💥💥💥

On the other hand, sometimes life's most meaningful moments grow even from the briefest of connections LIKE WHEN you go to a party and meet someone wearing your favorite band's t-shirt OR WHO laughs at the same jokes as you OR grabs that unpopular snack you alone [OR so you thought] love.  One small, shared interest could spark a conversation  and that conversation could progressively blossom.  WHAT this tells us is that NO matter WHAT we are in life, NO matter WHAT status we belong, NO matter WHAT circumstances we are confronted with, we should CHERISH THE PRESENT💦💦💦

Looking back, WHO else is to blame WHEN sometimes we tend to have some discontentment and are complaining, can we bear in mind that there are people in this very moment WHO are struggling for their survival, existence and worst, even their very last breathe [and that could be literally speaking].  IF only you were able to wake up [from your own deep slumber], WHY can't we be thankful for the life gifted upon us RIGHT NOW.  And as life changes constantly, actual life goes by so fleetingly quickly, we end up NOT noticing the changes that have been transpiring right in front us.  BTW, every minute of our life has an EXPIRATION DATE and that is 'NOW'.  Once a moment has passed, it is gone forever except in our memories.  Cherishing the present as they happen will NOT only help us feel thankful for life BUT also help us to have a more positive and happy outlook in life😃😃😃

Our takeaway:  At the end of our life, I am quite absolutely sure that we DON'T want to regret all the things we DIDN'T attempt OR recognize.  Nothing hurts OR stings worse than regret both of things we SHOULDN'T have done OR things we should have done BUT DIDN'T do.  THAT ALLURE OF THE NEW, can we relegate it in lieu of the present???

NO Talent? NO Problem!

NO Talent?  NO Problem!

Before anything else, our thread today does NOT intend to underestimate OR downplay the TALENTS we do have in life.  Because everyone of us have our own respective TALENTS and most of our respective TALENTS are unique enough.  And BTW, it's nothing to feel 'small' if you're NOT a rocket scientist.  And it's fine if your talent is making origami paper initiatives.  BUT just in case you DON'T really have any TALENT, then, NO Talent?  NO Problem!  WHY?  There are tons and tons of opportunities for you to showcase the BEST OF YOURSELF [even sans any TALENT you're sure NOT to have.  This is the huge miss of most people with NOT much TALENT.  Without any TALENT, they [wrongly] thought that their life is kaput, it's done???

Most of the time, you will hear from numerous mentors that you should come on time for the scheduled meetings.  I beg to disagree because through the years, my favorite one-liner to my team members is this:  WHEN YOU'RE ON TIME, YOU'RE LATE,  If you're ready to debate me on this, I'm more than willing to roll-up my sleeves and get into the fray.  WHY?  If you got a 900am meeting and you walk into the room at 900am, very likely, the host has started the meeting [SO, at that point, technically, YOU'RE LATE!@#$%?

Let's share these no-frills stuff for you to even eventually 'rise up' even in the middle of a mammoth crowd, even if you got ZERO TALENT:

• YES, BE PUNCTUAL - As I espoused awhile ago, IF YOU COME ON TIME, YOU'RE LATE.  So?  You should walk-in or join the call approximately five minutes prior.
• BE AGILE, BE ADAPTABLE - The past twenty years, the workplace environment has turned upside down.  If you're a line manager, you are NOT expected to signoff approvals on your swivel chair all the time.  Be ready to adapt

• KNOW THE RULES, PLAY BY THE RULES - This is the least one can do, playing within the rules.  Breach it and you're  one foot down.
• BE READY FOR THE EXTRA MILE - Gone are the 8am to 5pm clockworks.  Given that many organizations are now operating by FOLLOWING THE SUN, be ready to take the EXTRA MILE even if that means burning the midnight oil or even waking up at the wee hours of the next morning😁😁😁
• 
  Our takeaway:  There are tons of INTANGIBLES that will equip yourself in life even if you think so that you got no TALENT at all.  Projecting that POSITIVITY through your attitude and mindset is a good start.  Attitude is one of those ephemeral qualities that people love, BUT usually CAN'T define.  In this case, attitude means POSITIVITY.  Giving a hundred HIGH FIVEs, hyping your teammates up, being the first to rush to the field WHEN someone else makes a big play.  Everyone loves that kind of teammate.  And be READY all the time.  It's all HANDS ON DECK, the NEXT MAN UP.  In the NBA, almost all players are damn good but for a 15-man team, easily half a dozen are warming the bench because of the rotations BUT they're always ready as the NEXT MAN UP.  NO TALENT?  NO PROBLEM!!!
  

Where Is The BEST FREE TIME?

Where Is The BEST FREE TIME?

Where Is The BEST FREE TIME? Is it the FREE TIME that just falls on your lap?  You'll be surprised a plurality, if NOT majority, will scream AYEs.  BUT let's be more incisive.  Is that really the best way for us to earn the FREE TIME we truly deserve?  C'mon dude.  We talk a lot about FREE TIME.  BUT WHAT we fail to to get is the thing that FREE TIME gets the right flavor WHEN it is earned.  THAT's WHEN we get to just enjoy the time📗📙📘

The thing is, you CAN'T just wake up in the morning and say you have so much FREE TIME.  Like you just DIDN'T do any work.  So, WHAT's the fuss for the FREE TIME?  You are unhappy because you are always happy???? That kind of baffles me.  You are getting food.  You are getting to sleep so much.  Your parents are giving you everything.  And life is just so okay.  Sadly, eventually you are the one WHO is the SADDEST👽👽👽

BUT hey, everything seems in place.  It's true we humans are the happiest WHEN we are building things.  Our lives.  Our business.  Our mind.  Our body.  Solving problems are at our core level, that's the naked truth we got to embrace.  It's time for us to take up some tough work ahead.  So, WHY DON'T we get busy and start having a packed up schedule.  FREE TIME is earned from a busy schedule and now, DON'T ever fall for the trap that FREE TIME comes anyway💥💥💥

To quote William Penn, the famous English writer, 'TIME IS WHAT WE WANT MOST BUT WHAT WE USE WORST'.  Thing is, you can find time in your day.  To be happy and productive, you need less time than you may think.  Getting enough FREE TIME in your day is possible if you control your time.  How much FREE TIME do you wish you had?  Your answer may surprise you, seriously.  Having too little FREE TIME is terrible for you and having too much FREE TIME is bad for you as well.  Let's find enough time and learn that 'sweet spot' of FREE TIME is critical❎❎❎

Our takeaway:  let's heed the advice of experts.

• DETERMINE YOUR NON-NEGOTIABLE - Once you identified the non-negotiables, you can make time for them.
• FIND OUT YOUR TIME WASTERS - It's as simple as going to your smartphone, see WHAT apps you used the most that day.  See your SCREEN TIME display.  WHAT apps are really wasting your time?

Bottomline, CREATE YOUR FREE TIME and DON'T wait for FREE TIME to fall on your lap😌😌😌