Heavy Lifting In Life

Heavy Lifting In Life

So sorry folks if you mistook today's thread as being written by a gym buff because I'm not one. But instead, we'd like to delve more about our Heavy Lifting In Life.  While we all keep harping on our sense of responsibility in terms of taking care of our families and loved ones, what pops up as well is the frequency and extent of our Heavy Lifting In Life.  Are we single-handedly taking the Heavy Lifting In Life💊💊💊

The other day as we were on a short countryside holiday, I noticed a line of ants crossing the path in front of me.  Momentarily I paused and watched them all queueing in a single line.  Not aware where they were going or if they were walking with a purpose, I then noticed one carrying a leaf.  And then I noticed another.  And another again.  And those ants carrying leaves  seemed to be keeping up BUT the longer I watched, the more I noticed they were walking a little slower than the others📌📌📌

I DON'T know much about ants and I have NO idea how they decided which ants need to carry the leaves and which ants can continue walking unencumbered.  All I noticed was that some ants were walking peacefully while others were carrying a heavy burden.  And that reminded me about life itself.  Sometimes, we tend to walk peacefully but other times, Heavy Lifting In Life comes into play.  There are seasons in life where the path is easy and the burdens are light⏳⏳⏳

Indeed, during those times, health is good, $$$$$ is in the bank, relationships are healthy and our habits are serving us well.  But there are seasons in life where the burden is heavy.  For those with families, kids are making unwise choices, our relationships with our loved ones seem to be turning against us and bad news continues to mount with no end in sight.  Yet, when we look around, everyone else seem to be fine, unencumbered, enjoying their path through life and even celebrating their share of successes.  BUT we're stuck carrying that HEAVY LEAF.  We're trying our hardest to keep up BUT the burden seems heavy💎💎💎

Quo vadis?  Here's our challenge of a lifetime.  Those of us rushing swiftly from one end to another, unburdened, without that LEAF.  Take time to notice those with HEAVY BURDENS.  There is a temptation when our burden is light to NOT notice the HEAVY LIFTING being done by others.  That Heavy Lifting In Life✅✅✅

When Intentions Are NOT Enough

When GOOD Intentions Are NOT Enough

Does this sound familiar?  When we uttered YES  a zillion times when we were prodded to do or perform something.  Fast forward, how was it?  If I may guess, those zillion YES replies all got stalled.  So, what's our issue here?  It is WHEN GOOD INTENTIONS ARE NOT ENOUGH  that's becoming a challenge for us, even in the most sublime and seemingly mundane fashion.  But c'mon, we got to take this seriously⏳⏳⏳

Thing is, good intentions are just NOT enough.  We usually expect our gifts and help to strengthen our relationships with our recipients.  But that doesn't always happen.  Indeed, givers are sometimes taken aback when recipients respond negatively.  They often think of things like:  I WAS ONLY TRYING TO HELP or WHY DO THEY RESENT ME WHEN I'VE BEEN SO GOOD TO THEM'.  Back at work, have you ever worked so hard at something that the more you tried, the harder the task became and the further away your goal seemed to get?  In the shortest words, ONE STEP FORWARD, TWO STEPS BACKWARD.  Ironically, the same way that fear brings to pass what one is afraid of, likewise a forced intention makes impossible what one may forcibly wish for📌📌📌

Let's go back to our work scenarios.  Our jobs are always MORE THAN OUR JOBS.  They represent relationships between us and others within the workplace.  And that even extends to our customers.  All these relationships weave together through our work, they all have their meanings, both individually and collectively.  When we focus too intently on the outcome, these relationships may suffer💎💎💎

Meaning is then found in our awareness of the MOMENT and when we get too far from the MOMENT we start to lose our effectiveness.  Even when the stakes are high and our success is essential, , focusing on the results rather than the process can actually get in the way of a successful outcome.  We all know how it works.  The higher the expectations are, the more disconnected we are from the actual accomplishment of it and the less able we are to participate when it unfolds✅✅✅

To quote Victor Frankl, a well respected psychiatrist, "OUR GOOD INTENTIONS ACTUALLY BECOME THE CAUSE OF OUR FAILURE".  When a specific success is so fervently sought that we tend to overlook and neglect the relationships that are an integral part of the process, we lay the seeds for something to go wrong.  In the end, we seem to fly in the face of our own success. Really, When Intentions Are Not Enough❗❗❗

Your BELLS & WHISTLES

Your BELLS & WHISTLES

Please DON'T get me wrong here.  Your BELLS & WHISTLES are most welcome because that's part and parcel of life.  Boosting and enhacing our life and our relationships with our loved ones really need those BELLS & WHISTLES.  So, you might wonder:  So what gives? What is it that bothers us?  Hmmmmm, not that it's bothersome but in life, beside all those BELLS & WHISTLES, we need to make and shape things to be content-heavy and not that hollow that seemingly makes life alive via BELLS & WHISTLES.  We just DON'T want you to waste your life.  And while no one sets out to fritter away one's time, who knows💎💎💎

Let's do some basic number crunching.  As per studies, each of us has roughly 27,000 days to live, subtract a third or so of that for sleeping and another chunk for those early formative years which you DON'T remember and CAN'T just control, you're left with a pretty terrifying low number.  Oooooops i'm sorry, this is NOT to depress you.  But as the great philosophers have reminded us, remembering the SHORTNESS OF LIFE is what spurs us all to live authentically⏳⏳⏳

And frankly, when you are cognizant of the fact that time is short, trust me, you will value it appropriately.  And when you value time appropriately, you just DON'T want to waste it.  And if you have any sense at all of how precious life is, you will then tend to avoid obvious ways to fritter away your hours and years, just like many TV and movie binges.  But there are many ways to let life pass you by that are less easy to spot and therefore more dangerous.  So, HOW can we complement the BELLS & WHISTLES?  DON'T surround yourself with the 'WRONG PEOPLE'.  Just choose to spend your time with those where you will be productive and happy.  Be wary to end up with a recipe for wasted time📌📌📌

Obviously, there are many ways we can go wrong [like, God forbid, spending and wasting your energy dealing with manipulators and narcissists], whew.  BUT one of the most disastrous can also be the easiest to fall into because it's based on kindness and optimism, sticking with a relationship of any sort simply because you were thinking the other party will change✅✅✅

But again, that's another recipe for tons of wasted time.  In fact, studies have proven that RELATIONSHIPS REQUIRE MAINTENANCE' but again there's a difference between maintaining a good relationship and trying to force a bad once that doesn't make much sense to begin with.  When you're fundamentally incompatible with someone [whether that's in business or in romance], cut your losses or risk wasting too much of your limited time.  Always remember folks that we should not end up with a 'hollowed life' that goes with those BELLS & WHISTLES.  Our need is to have a substantive and meaningful life no less❗❗❗

What's Keeping You Awake [And Struggling To Sleep]?

What's Keeping You Awake [And Struggling To Sleep]?

NOT a RED FLAG that will burn and turn our house into ashes [NO please] but struggling to sleep at night is an issue impacting hundreds of millions of us.  BUT before we dive-in to look for the solution, let's throw upon us the most important question we need to address anyway, right now and it's What's Keeping You Awake [And Struggling To Sleep]💎💎💎

Well, no one amongst us likes to be interrupted during our sleep but alas, that isn't the biggest challenge we're facing because what's more prevalent is the struggle to really fall sleep.  And NOT to miss out the more important things, sleep helps our body heal, it gives us a mental break and it offers just one too many benefits, both mentally and physically.  If we need to make it safe out the door next day, obviously, we need a quality sleep NO less⏳⏳⏳

Now, if you're frequently dozing in and out of sleep, tossing and turning or worse, constantly checking the clock while attempting to sleep, that mere thought of hitting the hay may even spike your ANXIETY.  Now for the scary piece.  Heard of increasing ANXIETY and depression levels?  Worsening wait gain?  Increasing the risk of a heart attack or stroke?  And then your immune system seems to weaken?  Those are indeed TELL-TALE signs that your sleep disorder is taking its toll on your health📌📌📌

So, how do we go around all these?  #1, DON'T let your anxiety and depression go untreated.  Could there be anything more frustrating than finally settling in bed only to have your mind start racing with intrusive thoughts?  If you find yourself waking up frequently with worries or panicked feelings, you might be experiencing nigh time ANXIETY✅✅✅

On the other hand, if you're battling frequent daytime sleepiness, that could be NARCOLEPSY, that neurological disorder that robs you of regular sleep patterns at night.  Got to seek treatment for that.  And if it's all about your LIFESTYLE, it boils down to your choices when the sun or the moon is up.  Bottom line, fix your issue that KEEPS YOU AWAKE and STILL STRUGGLING to sleep [Ooooops, as a DISCLAIMER, if it's all about Netflix and/or Korean Movies. PLEASE DISREGARD this 'NOISE'].  Enjoy your binge-watch ❗❗❗

If You're Not On The Table, You're On The Menu

If You're Not On The Table, You're On The Menu

Good day sirrrrs, hoping everything is fine at your end.  Ooooooops no sirrrrs. our thread today has got nothing to do with culinary arts but it's all about life, those numerous situations where you're neither here nor there but essentially, what we like to underscore here is that If You're Not On The Table, You're On The Menu📌📌📌

Briefly. what this thread tells us is that, ideally in life, you need to be 'part of the equation'.  At home, either as an immediate family member, spouse/partner or even a child grown up enough, it pays that ypu're a part of general discussions, brainstorming and even planning an activity or family event.  WHY?  Because your inputs would matter and as such your voice need to be heard⏳⏳⏳

Whereas, many times in the past, I can attest to having witnessed frustrating instances when someone was just fine being at the fringes of things, letting everyone else brainstorm and he'll just ride on the bandwagon when it's time to.  WHAT does that make of him.  Bluntly, one becomes inutile, useless unless he's at a senile phase of his life💎💎💎

You can even initiate something so you become a part of the equation.  When I was still a Singaporean citizen, i made a conscious decision to VOLUNTEER as a Probation Officer at its Ministry of Community Development.  Once I get assigned cases, I was at the forefront of helping reform juvenile delinquents and that gave me a SENSE of FULFILLMENT even $$$$$ can't buy✅✅✅

What did I get out of VOLUNTEERISM?  You'll be surprised though with its enormous benefits.  Volunteering offers vital help to people in need.  The right VOLUNTEER match can help you connect with the community, learn new skills and even advance your career.  Most importantly, this tells us that while it's NOT the end of the world IF YOU'RE NOT ON THE TABLE,  there are multiple ways for you to be part of the equation and BE RELEVANT in life❗❗❗

Our Life Is A Container

Our Life Is A Container    

Recently, our thread was about opportunities compared to the immense sheets of the ocean.  BUT please DON'T misconstrue me that I'm implying that life itself is akin to an ocean.  No sirrrrrs.  On the other hand, Our Life Is A Container, no more, no less.  We DON'T even need to talk about the capacity or size of any or all of the containers because it's NOT about the capacity but rather, the fact that our life is within a container, there is one trap.  We must be constantly wary to avoid any contamination from within [the container]💊💊💊

One of the most unfortunate [but unseen] contaminations in life is FORGIVENESS.  To quote from www.invajy.com, "BY FORGIVING, YOU DON'T FORGIVE THE PERSON WHO DID SOMETHING WRONG BUT YOU FORGIVE YOURSELF".  Truth is, if/when someone offends you [and you DON'T forgive], that is akin to ruining your very own life.  You just can't take life too seriously.  People will hurt you and you will hurt others.  Holding on to grudges will only blind you from focusing on what is truly important⏳⏳⏳

WHEN you live in REGRETS, you're likely contaminating [and RUINING] your life.  Listen, your past CANNOT be changed.  Learn from it and move on.  Living in REGRETS only saps your positive ENERGY and distracts you from possibilities in life.  WHEN you start comparing yourself to others, you'll be 'contaminating' your container.  There is nothing as AWFUL as degrading as trying to compare yourself with others.  We are all unique, so why try to compare yourself with someone who is NOT you📌📌📌

WHEN $$$$$$$ is raining, life is good but once we believe that $$$$$$ will make you happy, I'm afraid that MAY lead your life towards being ruined.  Money offers you freedom but there are many simple things in life that will make you happy and they DON'T require any money, seriously.  Draining your life and focusing all your attention on wealth can really make you distraught.  And when you're NOT grateful, you can be on the wrong path.  Gratitude means to appreciate the things you have.  If you are thankful, you will be at peace💎💎💎

In a nutshell, we want our lifetime journey to be free from any contamination, any negativity that will spread out within our container, our life.  BUT admittedly, this is easier said than done because our lifetime journey is one hell of a treacherous trek where our mettle will be tested.  But the best safeguards we can get embedded in our life is to safeguard our life from any that leans and leads towards negativities because at the end of the day, even your health will be at the receiving end.  So, let's live a life as bright as the sunlight and as green as the leaves in summer✅✅✅

Keep Digging Till You Get It

Keep Digging Till You Get It

Life never runs out of narratives how people rolled up their sleeves and toiled till his energy got drained.  To quote former Republican Congressman Newt Gingrich, "PERSEVERANCE IS THE HARD WORK YOU DO AFTER YOU GET TIRED OF DOING THE HARD WORK YOU ALREADY DID". So, we're taught from a young age that 'WE CAN DO ANYTHING THAT WE PUT OUR MINDS TO".  But hey, what about when your mind is working against you?  How do you keep going then?  Keep Digging Till You Get It📌📌📌

We all have days when we want to run away and relax at the beach.  BUT, unless you're actually going to drop everything and become a travel writer, it's probably NOT a realistic escape plan.  A better one is to lock at how you motivate yourself.  Sometimes, it's really easy to persevere.  However, motivation can all too easily slip away⏳⏳⏳

Oh, studies tell us that we should NOT blame our own selves for sometimes feeling like we want to run and hide.  You can be flying through a task only to get bogged down in the detail.  You may find it more difficult and more time-consuming than you anticipated.  OR, you might be good at coming up with new ideas but lose interest in the execution.  After the first wave of enthusiasm, doubts creep in and sometimes you might think "AM I REALLY UP TO THE TASK?"  Studies show that our motivation changes as we move towards our goal.  We're inspired by hope and positive outcomes at the beginning.  BUT, as we continue, we start to focus on responsibilities and the fear of negative outcomes.  And often, ir is often this FEAR that halts our progress💎💎💎

Indeed, it can become a demoralizing spiral.  You leave a trail of unfinished or poorly handled tasks in your wake.  And every morning you lie in bed, hitting snooze on your alarm, filled with the doom-laden sense that you'll never finish or succeed.  We may never know quite how much we could achieve if only we tried✅✅✅

And this leads us back to MOTIVATION because that's the only factor that will keep you digging till you get it.  In fact, MOTIVATION is often the result of an action [rather than the cause of it]  so we're really hoping that let you keep digging till you get it❗❗❗

When Your Strength Becomes Your Weakness

When Your Strength Becomes Your Weakness

Our strengths are often hard-earned [even if sometimes we refuse to admit it [all because of our misplaced ego].  BUT the truth is, they must be recognized, developed and then deployed in a precise manner to make them useful.  Regardless of the path you took to embrace your STRENGTHS, it really does take time and effort but the biggest 'TRAP' is When Your Strength Becomes Your Weakness💎💎💎

Note that your STRENGTHS may also be a big part of how others value your contributions.  However, your hard-earned strengths can become your weaknesses as well.  It is all too easy to slide into the habit of turning to personal STRENGTHS to solve every problem that comes along, regardless if it is the right tool for the job.  Example, decisive people often charge ahead to get to a solution BUT sometimes, a more measured approach best fits⏳⏳⏳

But hey, there are workaround to mitigate that risk of our strengths turning into our weakness.  First off, TAKE A MOMENT BEFORE TAKING ACTION.  That ability to make quick decisions and having a bias toward action are valuable STRENGTHS that can 'MOVE MOUNTAINS'.  Before making that BIG DECISION, take a moment to invite feedback and look into options📌📌📌

Next, ACKNOWLEDGE THE STRENGTH GAP.  Having a specific STRENGTH isn't a weakness per se.  BUT, it may imply that there are other STRENGTHS that you may be missing or something which you can improve on.  Example in the workplace, if the majority of your team excels in research, due diligence and fact gathering, there may be a STRENGTH  gap in something equally important, such as compelling and concise communications.  Identifying existing STRENGTH GAPS is a first step✅✅✅

Next, just DON'T GET TOO COMFORTABLE as unless you make it a priority to recognize and work on your weaknesses, your STRENGTH may become a crutch.  In can BLIND you to other options and make you hesitant to appear vulnerable or to ask for help.  Getting out of your comfort zone can help keep your STRENGTH from becoming 'THE ONLY TOOL in your toolbox.  Avert your STRENGTH ending up as your WEAKNESS❗❗❗

How Are You Taking Those Punches

How Are You Taking Those Punches

Life is full of UPs and DOWNs.  One day you may feel like you have figured things out BUT in a moment's notice, you're suddenly thrown in a CURVE BALL.  BTW, you're NOT alone in these predicaments.  Everyone has to face their own set of challenges and learning how to overcome such challenges will help you stay centered and remain calm.  So, How Are You Taking Those Punches

But here's the tricky part.  Each of us got our own preferences how to face a challenge in life.  I can attest to this when I gave my unsolicited advice [and tons of HELP] for a family member but that's the farthest I can go.  He can ignore my piece of advice and that's about it.  But having said this, there are fundamental ways of facing our challenges in life⏳⏳⏳

Topping these best practices is to always MAKE A PLAN.  While you DON'T know what is going to happen in the future, you can always plan ahead.  Look at the patterns in your life and see the challenges you struggled most💎💎💎

Next, BE AWARE that YOU'RE NOT ALONE.  Every one of us has his 'LOW POINTS' and some may handle [or even HIDE] it better than others.  But the truth is, whatever you are going through, there are others who have been through it too.  Then, ASK FOR HELP.  There's no point to feel ashamed to ASK FOR HELP whether it's with your loved one , a mentor, a friend or worst, even a stranger.  Thereafter, FEEL YOUR FEELINGS✅✅✅

By masking your feelings, they are NOT going away.  Rather, feelings become TRAPPED ENERGY and can even have negative health consequences when they are ignored.  Take some time to feel what you feel.  This way, you may be able to see your situation in a new list.  HOW you're TAKING THOSE PUNCHES is what matters most in life❗❗❗

Smishing, Anyone?

Smishing, Anyone?

Oh, I was hesitant to have SMISHING as our thread for today because I thought we have had an information overflow already with regard all the FRAUDULENT tricks happening around us.  BUT, having received this latest alert from my banker that 70% of those who received fraudulent SMS get scammed ! And that from the total mobile users, 35% have received those fraudulent SM, whew❗❗❗

Oh, DON'T let the funny name confuse you because SMISHING is a major scam that could cost you BIG BUCKS.  While a text message or SMS may seem quite normal, it could be from someone with malicious intent, probably someone who wants to steal your IDENTIFY, your BANK ACCOUNT NUMBER, amongst others.  Even the cyber security company PROOFPOINT found that 74% of companies faced these texting attacks✅✅✅

But things DON'T stop there because scammers are sending SCAM TEXTS or SMS to fool us individuals with this this SMISHING.  Do take note SMISHING is different from PHISHING scams and other scams targeting iPhone security.  It can affect anyone who texts or send SMS regardless of smartphone model and fraudsters can claim they're from IRS [in the U.S.] or IRAS [in Singapore] or, hold your breath, from your bank📌📌📌

BTW, the text messages or SMS are, at the very least, shocking, scary.  Messages like:  "WE'VE NOTICED SUSPICIOUS or LOG-IN ATTEMPTS" or "THERE IS A PROBLEM WITH YOUR ACCOUNT or PAYMENT" or "YOU MUST CONFIRM YOUR PERSONAL INFORMATION" or "YOU'RE ELIGIBLE FOR A REFUND" or "YOU WON & YOU NEED TO CLAIM IT", amongst others, just one too many⏳⏳⏳

What does all these tell us? This is scary but I'd rather scare you to death rather you just 'DROP DEAD'.  The harsh reality is that fraudsters are light years ahead of even all the cyber security experts we have and they WON'T stop because of the allure of $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$