DON'T Be An Ostrich Who Buries its Head in the Sand

 DON'T Be An Ostrich Who Buries its Head in the Sand

For a change, let's slightly veer towards the ostrich but not to dissect its anatomy but rather to wet our appetite to the fact that An Ostrich Buries its Head in the Sand.  So, who wants to be an Ostrich?  But not to be defensive, I'm quite sure not one of us would want to but what happens if we replicate that habit of the Ostrich Burying its Head in the Sand?  And before we castigate the poor Ostrich, why do they bury their head in the sand?  It's their habit when nesting or when they want to avoid or get threatened by predators.  

Oh Oh, not a valid reason for us humans to borrow, right?But are we aware that several times [and for some, probably many times] in our life, we are very much akin to the Ostrich that buries its head in the sand?  How many times we made fumbling acts and when we had to face the consequences, we were like the  Ostrich that buries its head in the sand?  Or when we were confronted to right the wrong but we turned a deaf ear and a blind eye?  Or when we know we erred but refused to accept and make a 'mea culpa'?

OR when you offended or hurt someone but to rub salt on the open wound, you DON'T only accept the mistake but worse you are NOT even remorseful.  OR when you have a real problem, a damn crisis on your hands but you refused to accept the fact that you're beset with that crisis. 

OR when all you need to look at things wide-eyed but you would rather look at the other direction?  OR when you are staring at potential red flags but you just shrugged it off?  OR when you owe your spouse/partner an explanation but with your bloated EGO & PRIDE all rolled into one, you end up so callous and insensitive because your selfishness prevails over you

So, what could be your end point here?  Not to be riding on the coattails of Nostradamus but it's likely that one day, you will find yourself walking right through the all-welcoming mouth of the unforgiving crocodile who'll just feast on you till it squeezes the very last drop and drip of blood from you.  So, please let us not be an Ostrich who buries its head in the sand📌📌📌

The Fish Rots From The Head Down

 The Fish Rots From The Head Down

Borrowing a French expression, "The Fish Rots From The Head Down" is something more than just another no-brainer because logic and rational do tell us that, that exactly what it really is.  But why are we spending time on this today?  It's because some of us tend to be off-track sometimes, thinking that to get rotten does NOT really start from the head down?  How often have we heard stories wherein a previously successful person suddenly went down on a tailspin because everything went up to his head until that head was outsized and too much for him to handle📌📌📌

Back into our lives, how relevant is this French expression that "The Fish Rots From The Head Down"?  Heard of stories back in school when we had a classmate who was the perennial #1 in class year-on-year until, one day, his scholastic standing just went down the drain as fast as that shooting star cruising down fast to Earth❓❓❓

And who's our worst enemy?  More often, our enemy is our very own self.  Think when our EGO grows beyond normal proportions such that most of the things we need to undertake are more influenced and dictated by our outsized EGO rather than rational thinking lording it over us.  And when our EGO takes over our own self, does this dovetail that "The Fish Rots From The Head Down"

By the time our workplace becomes our secondary home, we would have fully adjusted day-in day-out until such time you steadily go up the ranks, at least from a tenure perspective.  And this is when I could attest having witnessed "The Fish getting rotten From The Head Down" because often, our outgrown and outsized EGO would literally take over our self📌📌📌

So what's our cheat sheet to avert and disprove that "The Fish Rots From The Head Down"?  This poster says it all.  EGO, kill it.  LOVE, value it.  SMILE, keep it.  GOSSIP, ignore it.  SUCCESS, achieve it.  JEALOUSY, distance it.  KNOWLEDGE, acquire it.  CONFIDENCE, trust it.  In a nutshell, what this tells us that when you plunge into the waters, split and divide the waters the way the Red Sea's waters parted apart.  Most importantly, we need to disprove that "The Fish Rots From The Head Down"📕📗📘

A Shred of Truth OR A Grain of Truth

A Shred of Truth OR A Grain of Truth 

Tough times indeed.  And the mother of all ironies is that information and TRUTH for that matter is all over the place, some within reach although a lot more, you have to exert extra efforts to eke out the TRUTH you want to have.  And with the proliferation of mobile applications and a lot more on-the-fly tools and software, it is surprising that some of us still end up holding on to information that is either UNTRUE or UNVERIFIABLE.

In the not so distant past, pollsters were revered like DEMIGODS.  In fact, any data they spew off from their media releases are [almost] always] tagged as gospel truth.  I just cannot recall where the credibility and veracity of any of the poll results were ever blemished with a tinge of doubt, moreso questioned.  But not these days though.

Throw in the numbers and what do we have is, voila, pandemonium no less.  But the grim and sadder part is not the complexity of the intertwined islands of information but rather how we, hapless people, are being hoodwinked and misled with half-truths and even 'UNTRUTHS' by the very vanguards of information, civil, federal and government officials [and sadly, politicians are NOT exempted from this sweeping swath.

Not to our least surprise, many of us end up being caught in the middle of all the tera data of information, of which a good chunk is rubbish no less.  So what's the fix?  Numero Uno, DONT accept all information hook, line and sinker, regardless if your very source is either your friend, your colleague or even your family members or relatives.

To be on the safe side of things, go only for either the SHRED or GRAIN of TRUTH and no less than that.  Worst thing is when you are either bamboozled, conned or deluded to embrace an information that is either UNTRUE or just a sheer concoction of the peddlers of misinformation.  We just DON'T want to end up on the receiving end other than the SHRED and GRAIN of TRUTH✅✅✅

'PEOPLE PLEASING' And How To Overcome it

'PEOPLE PLEASING' And How To Overcome It 

PLEASING is one of the most popular [and admittedly] overused word of intent ever in life.  From our early formative years, no less than our parents and teachers all immersed us with the age-old value of pleasing people, starting obviously with your family, your relatives, your friends till it gets an extended coverage to encompass friends and even friends of friends.  But how about PLEASING Customers as a best practice?

Being someone who PLEASES people sounds on the face of it, like a very good idea.  But it is a pattern of behavior riddled with problems as much for the perpetrator as for its audience.  The 'PEOPLE-PLEASER' is someone who might at times be oneself who feels they have no option but to mould themselves to the expectations of others. The irony here is that one could be harboring all manners of secret 

Putting it bluntly, we could say that the 'PEOPLE-PLEASER' is a liar.  It sounds brutal but the 'PEOPLE-PLEASER' may be lying for poignant reasons and NOT in order to gain an advantage but because they are terrified of the displeasure of others.  To understand the 'PEOPLE-PLEASER', we need to look at their past which almost invariably involves an early experience of being around people who may seem radically incapable of accepting and forgiving certain necessary facts.

If there is any exception where we will all welcome the 'PEOPLE-PLEASER' approach, it is for CUSTOMERS.  DON'T look far.  We can attest to how easy and quick [in two steps] one can cancel his NETFLIX subscription when he opts to, all thanks to NETFLIX for being focused to be the same reputed 'PEOPLE-PLEASER' to its customers.  But other than this exception, 'PEOPLE-PLEASER' has no place in our life.

So how do we fix this conundrum of being a 'PEOPLE-PLEASER'?  Simple and easy.  Be WHO YOU ARE.  Be WHAT YOU ARE.  Make your judgment calls on your very own volition.  NO ONE and NOTHING should push you to the corner simply to be a  'PEOPLE-PLEASER' because that doesn't make you and your life true and genuine enough.  Enough of being a 'PEOPLE-PLEASER'📌📌📌

For Every ACTION, There Is A REACTION

For Every ACTION, There Is A REACTION

Today's piece is NOT about Physics but allow me please to take the courtesy of revisiting one of Sir Isaac Newton's Laws of ACTION and REACTION wherein it states that For Every ACTION, There Is A REACTION.  Ok, enough, we won't get in a Physics thread as well but instead, look back into our lives and digest and absorb the truism of Newton's third law right into our life please.

BTW, Karma is the very law of CAUSE and EFFECT.  Your action or way of thinking creates a CAUSE and in time will see and feel the EFFECTS it has in your life.  Your ACTS and THOUGHTS are entirely your responsibility, making your karma entirely your own.  Every one of your thoughts and actions will create an equal and opposite reaction, which is why it is IMPORTANT that you consider things before you COMMIT certain acts and before you wish certain things where for you or for others.

So, basically, WHAT GOES AROUND, COMES AROUND so at hindsight, DON'T send anything out that you would NOT like coming back to you.  Keeping your karma good will assure you a pleasant life. And those times you are short-changed, just retort "NO PROBLEM" when someone cuts in front of you in line.  Take that good karma.

You might wonder, what made this thread our piece today?  Credit it to the NETFLIX docu 'TINDER SWINDLER' I watched today wherein the bogus billionaire SIMON LEVIEV [BTW. he had too many aliases besides this one] threatened each of his victims with this ominous thread, that FOR EVERY ACTION, THERE IS A REACTION.  And this was proven to be 'spot on' in that NETFLIX documentary because his victims collaborated to an extent that he was eventually arrested and incarcerated [but DON'T LET YOUR GUARD DOWN because he served just a few months in prison and now he's back in TINDER].  Nevertheless, let's just get back with our own lives and subscribe to that proven mantra that indeed, FOR EVERY ACTION, THERE IS A REACTION📌📌📌
 

Friends REDEFINED

 Friends REDEFINED

Not so long ago, who were your FRIENDS?  Surely it's either of the following:  your classmate from way back, your neighbor, your former colleague, the friend of your sibling, the friend of your relative, your regular close contacts in your commercial initiatives, your real estate agent whom you have gotten close.  So, it was hard to fathom if you would have anyone else other than from within that circle whom you will consider as your 'BONAFIDE' friends as it has been traditionally defined across cultures, not until FACEBOOK came into our lives.  Then, FRIENDS got REDEFINED.

When Facebook was first introduced by Mark Zuckerberg way back 2004, it was initially for Harvard students only.  But in 2008, the floodgates suddenly swung wide open.  Anyone AS IN anyone can have that coveted FB account and start collecting FRIENDS from a hundred to thousands and even to millions for the social influencers. But this FB phenomenon just threw a 'MONKEY WRENCH' to our age-old tradition, understanding and even practice of what Friends are really are.  But FB just REDEFINED it, Suddenly, you can be a cave man, a recluse or an introvert but INSTANT FRIENDS can be INSTANT.

And not so long ago, even in the context of the American culture, Friends are indeed friends during the Friday BARBECUE gatherings and during 'Family Day' events.  So, the hardest question is, is there still a glimmer of hope for us to help FRIENDS REDEFINED?  Yesirrrrrrs we have a concrete chance to have these FRIENDS REDEFINED.  So how?

Simple.  Go back to your FB Friends LIST and 'SANITIZE' it pronto, 'CLEANSE' it right now.  How do you SANITIZE & CLEANSE it?  DELETE strangers.  DELETE even people you know but probably made a FRIEND REQUEST just to snoop into your FB.  DELETE those incognitos.  And do consider DELETING even legit FRIENDS but who seem to be on the 'OTHER SIDE of the FENCE', whew

Why don't we reminisce even our friendship with our pet dogs.  They may be animals but hey, friendship with our pet dogs is as genuine and as legitimate as it can get.  Let's NOT be so CAUGHT UP with the 'REAL NUMBERS' of your FB FRIENDS unless you can assure yourself that you have CLEANSED and SANITIZED your FB FRIENDS LIST so that you will be bereft, divested and devoid of BOGUS, PHONY  and SHAM friends.  You deserve LEGIT ones, no less✅✅✅

Too Little Too Late

 Too Little Too Late

Indeed, our lives remain colorful despite sometimes, things do become that boring.  But sometimes, either we are ahead of the pack and sometimes, we're doing some catch up.  Sometimes we exert lesser efforts but we're not in 'catch up' mode whereas sometimes we're in 'catch up' mode but our efforts are just right.  Things turn to bad and even worse when, without us realizing it, it is Too Little Too Late.  Imagine you are in a 'serious trouble' and you realized by then that you are in that Too Little Too Late situation.

Honestly, in life, we end up with so many 'Too Little Too Late' situations but it does NOT seem chronic because each exception seems unique to itself.  Like way back in school, you realized your academic grades were not so good and by the time you did a 'catch up', it was the fourth quarter, Too Little Too Late.  Or at the workplace, you have been flopping with various misses and miscues and by the time you did a 'catch up', it was Too Little Too Late because performance appraisal time was around the corner and how can you turn things around at that point in time.  Or when your relationship was floundering and by the time you did a 'catch up', your partner/spouse just walked out❓❓❓

Or at those points when you were simply adventurous and kept paddling your kayak farther and farther from the shore until you ended up in 'catch up' mode but by that time, it was Too Little Too Late.  We could rattle off a long list of travails and turmoil when we were, over and over, in 'catch up' but in the end, when it was Too Little Too Late, we failed to recoup and recover, whew

Often times, the single most impactful element that triggers us to get into a 'catch up' mode is our TIME MANAGEMENT, that's it.  Many of us just DIDN'T develop that rigid self-discipline of managing our TIME. TIME is often taken for granted because its neither bought nor billed to us.  We thought it does NOT affect us financially.  No $$$$$ at all.  But we miserably fail to realize that TIME is worth more than just sheer $$$$.

So, which path do you want to take?  That path to EXHAUSTION?  Or that path to that 'YAY' moment?  But did you know that the difference in terms of efforts between an EXHAUSTED person versus a 'YAY' person is not that of a HUGE DIVIDE?  But everything boils down to TIME MANAGEMENT, enough to tilt things when it becomes Too Little Too Late📗📕📘

Our Illusions in Life

 Our Illusions in Life

Yesirrrrs life is all real but did we realize that we are being swarmed with all shapes and forms of Illusions in Life?!@#$%&  and it's unavoidable that even all the kinds of fears and limits we struggle [and live] in life are more illusionary than real.  Trust me.  For the non-swimmers who till now have yet to acquire Swimming 101, all those fears are illusionary.  And the limits we thought in life, they are illusions no less

Everyday, we are exposed to a perpetual Illusion of what we think life should look like that is portrayed through social media feeds name it, Instagram amongst others.  And when you plug-in the add-ons like all the filters technology offers, what do we have?  PERFECT portraits, selfies with PERFECT backdrops and zoom virtual calls with scenic beaches as our virtual background.

Browse the digital magazines and people are dressed to the 9's.  Even those pestering adverts which litter our social feeds with things we think we want but DON'T have.  All of these layers upon layers of social programming in the matrix.  Not only that we all contribute, participate and add to the programming.  And this illusion creates a perpetual state of dissatisfaction that keeps us buying shit we DON'T need to impress people we DON'T like, whew.  Our default is to feed a voracious and insatiable appetite for more.  Buy, eat, download, and acquire more.  Truth is, illusion is an imagined reality and social construct.  But with enough consumption, it becomes quite easy for us to confuse this illusion with objective reality.  When we envy a life that someone has curated, edited and uploaded, we have bought into the illusion of what we think our lives should look like and overlook that what we're experiencing is a filtered reality.

The illusion of what your life should look like is the ultimate marketing tool and a form of propaganda.  For the longest time, we valued the notions of security and safety.  A good life meant a good job with a steady paycheck.  But when an entire generation watches the one that came before them lose their retirement funds, it's NOT surprising that they DON'T place much value to security.  Some have called millennials an entitled generation because they do things on their own.  But what's happening is NOT just entitlement but a significant cultural value shift.

What throws a 'monkey wrench' to all our discussions is when someone believes that reality is an illusion we all agree on.  Oh to some extent, I agree with this.  If you ask me why most websites or creative projects are successes, my take is that it satisfies our need for our community our need to belong to something.  Lesson here is that illusions are littered all over in our life✅✅✅

The Spirit & Intent of a Law

The Spirit & Intent of a Law

This is NOT an advertorial of Singapore, the country where I resided for nine years and who I did embrace when i swore to take my allegiance to Singapore when I acquired the Singaporean citizenship. But instead, I want to trumphet Singapore's justice system because it gets accurately reflected in The Spirit & Intent of its laws.

What egged me to have Singapore's justice system as our talking point today was this news dispatch today October 26, 2022 from Channelnews Asia [please click for reference @ https://www.channelnewsasia.com/singapore/man-charged-failing-give-pet-cat-enough-food-and-water-resulting-its-death-3026256.  Heart warming and heartbreaking indeed when I saw the news dispatch 'MAN CHARGED FOR FAILING TO GIVE PET CAT ENOUGH FOOD AND WATER RESULTING IN ITS DEATH'.

Really spell-binding.  I realized that there is so much injustice in the Middle East and even in Ukraine and the Crimea and yet, here we are, witnessing Singapore's brand of justice which I am DREAMING [because I'm sure it will remain a PIPE DREAM] to be replicated across because of the very fair justice that is consistently imposed across, regardless of race [especially in a multi-cultural country like Singapore].  I just really envy Singapore Justice

But clearly, this is NO news to me because I bear witness with the Singapore brand of justice during my nine years residing in the city-state.  What is a cause of surprise for me is that, looking around the global villages, very few countries, if at all, have been able to replicate even a shadow of the Singapore brand of justice.  Not to water-down the justice systems in the U.S., North America and across EU and Australasia regions, it so happens that Singapore's Spirit & Intent of its Law is the one romping off as the 'runaway' model of justice system we hope gets replicated or modeled across.  MAJULAH SINGAPURA

You Could NOT Change What You Were BUT...

 You Could NOT Change What You Were BUT...

Very true indeed. You Could NOT Change What You Were BUT why is this our talking point today?  It's because many of us [even myself sometime in the distant past] thought that we could UNDO what just went through whether it was last week or yesterday.  There are just one too many things in life that we, you, can't just change, no matter how hard you try.  In fact, continuing to beat your head against the wall is NOT effective and worse, painful.  In fact, perseverance and tenacity are only good qualities when the objective you're working so hard to achieve is actually attainable.  There's just a lot in life you just can't change.  

But sometimes, we cannot be solely faulted for attempting in vain to change something in the past because of external factors but hey, you CAN'T please everyone.  Seriously, just STOP it.  Trying to make everyone happy is a thankless and soul-sucking endeavor that will only leave you drained and miserable.  Now, if you're holding a grudge on someone?  That is so futile unless what is you're really after is prolonging your own pain and unhappiness.  If that's what you're after?

Similarly, you CAN'T control what someone else thinks.  You can suggest, demand, implore or you can scream in at the top of your lungs but you CAN'T always change another person's mind.  You CAN'T make anyone like, love or forgive you.  You CAN'T win their respect if they're NOT willing to give it.  You just CAN'T.  And the NOT so difficult thing to do is that YESTERDAY IS OVER.  You just CAN'T get it back.

There are just NO UNDOs, NO REDOs.  Stop dwelling on the past.  You CAN'T change it.  The world around you, you CAN'T change it.  It's nice and inspirational and all to think one person could actually change the world but some things are just bigger than all of us.  You can definitely make a difference in the world around you.  Do keep watch that you're keeping your expectations of the impact you can actually have in check.

Sometimes, we would have LOST something in life.  That could either be material things or even losing someone in a relationship but there's just no way for you to recoup and replace something that is or was LOST because sometimes, the fact is, what's LOST is gone forever.  This is especially true of relationships which may be rekindled BUT trust me, it WON'T BE THE SAME again❗❗❗