When Things Get Into the Mud

When Things Get Into the Mud

C'mon. At some point in the past, did we ever get stuck in the mud?  Surely I would guess. I can rattle down a long list of the most common scenarios in life wherein we really ended up getting stuck in the mud  Health issues.  Financial issues.   Work issues.  Business issues.  Even relationship issues.  At some point we were all into that right.  The $64 question is, how did we get to extricate ourselves out When Things Get Into the Mud ?

Oh, you might question me.  Why am I making a fuss out  of this?  Hello yolo.  Yesirrrrs,  Is there no URGENCY that is akin to an EMERGENCY?  I myself, I had one experience in the past where, literally, my car got stuck in the mud and the urgency was just there because had I decided to buy my own sweet time, my car would have gone deeper into the mud.  But if it pertains to other emergencies in life, urgency is not even debatable.

 Problem is, when we are stuck into the Mud, we end up committing silly mistakes.  COMPARING our suffering to others?  REPRESSING negative emotions?  BLAME someone else for your pain?  UNFORGIVING a person who caused you pain?  FAILING to understand that b.  Anything good in life requires some sort of risk or sacrifice.  No one makes through with NO SCARS.  

Without understanding that PAIN, no matter how deep, eventually passes.  Nothing lasts.  Promise, thing will eventually get better.  Unless you understand that at the bottom of every shithole there's buried gold.  Stop trying to climb out and start looking for it.  Now for the HARD WORK.  Come up with three 'life lessons' from your 'shitty situation'.  That is the 'UNFUN' stuff.  It's so much easier to hop online and blame someone and post angry comments.

And DON'T forget to tell yourself that it's actually good that this awful thing happened to you and that maybe you will be grateful for it one day.  Then, REALIZE that you're probably lying to yourself.  Sometimes things just SUCK.  BTW, refrain from STABBING somebody, including yourself.  UNDERSTAND that most things in life are both GOOD and BAD at the same time.  Take a moment to think about all the things in your life that are amazing.  If you can't think of any, THINK HARDER 📌📌📌

[SECURITY ADVISORY] Sharing if this may be relevant to our readership

[SECURITY ADVISORY] Sharing if this may be relevant to our readership

Duly acknowledging my bankers [Citibank and BDO], sharing the below INFOGRAPHICS if these information may be relevant for you please.  Otherwise, I have not much value-add except to share the below.

Power & Persuasion as Siamese Twins

Power & Persuasion as Siamese Twins

With too many things happening all over us, we tend to overlook the relevance of Power & Persuasion.  But with the myriad of movable parts in our equations in life, we can't deny it that Power & Persuasion are Siamese Twins.  Not really to mean that you are born or vested with power but we are positioning power here only as a variable of the equation.  You may be powerless now but who'll deny that we all hunger for power, whether that power means the power of influence.

Before anything else, we got to admit that your personality will impact your ability to succeed.  If you are outgoing, you will more easily able to reach out to others.  If you are PERSISTENT and PERSUASIVE, you will overcome short term obstacles. If you are curious, you will seek out new knowledge.  If you are happy, often you will make those around you happy and likely to find people interested in helping you.

And your persuasive power impacts your ability to convince others of the wisdom of what you believe.  Sometimes, this persuasive power is detrimental when you convince others to follow a path that was in fact unwise.  A person who has persuasive power is able to convince people to make wise decisions but also to convince people to make unwise decisions.  What this means, besides knowledge, it behooves that we acquire that wisdom to know when someone else would be better off seeking someone else's advice.  That wisdom is more rare tough but as a rough gem, you can take that challenge.

These traits, while providing a guide for us to understand our means to influence someone else or even an organization for that matter would also provide a guide for potential weaknesses within your system.  There is really no advantage to having decisions unduly influenced by those with persuasive power while ignoring ideas from those without much ability to persuade people.  What we really want is to follow what is the best course of action.

Assuming we don't have that POWER yet, that is very fine but we should not default to miss that opportunity to develop our persuasive abilities because that will be the vehicle that will lead you through this mad rat race we're in.  And as your persuasion skills improves by notches, you will realize that in a subtle way, your SPHERE of INFLUENCE will exponentially grow ⏳⏳⏳

Have You Been a 'FIRE EXTINGUISHER' Before ?

Have You Been a 'FIRE EXTINGUISHER' Before ? 

We were NEVER born to be like either Superman, Wonder Woman or Captain America.  Leave them all to the world of FICTION.  But that does NOT mean that at some points in our life, we should have been like that fire extinguisher boxed in that "BREAK THE GLASS IN CASE OF EMERGENCY" boring corner.  Indeed a boring corner not until one day in an emergency, it becomes the most important thing to grab by any means and at all cost.  Quick question:  have you ever been like that 'FIRE EXTINGUISHER' at some points in your life ?  Just in case you haven't been into that circumstances, we would strongly encourage your 'READINESS' to embrace that 'OPPORTUNITY' if ever it arises.

Before going on with today's pitch for us to take on that 'FIRE EXTINGUISHER' role if needed, let's pose and run a memory recall if ever we did face any emergency, if at all ?  And if you may allow us to be speculative, I'm quite cockily confident that everyone of us did get into various emergencies in the past.

Back to the 'FIRE EXTINGUISHER' analogy, can we do a random sampling of the friends and relatives around you the past years and ask if at some point, you got involved in a role as a 'FIRE EXTINGUISHER' ?  To be a 'FIRE EXTINGUISHER', it need NOT be an emergency situation.  It could be someone who needed coaching in his studies and academics.  It could be someone fresh graduating from school and hitherto lost as to what path should he take right after leaving his school's portals.  It could be your relative you sulking after a breakup.  it could be an entrepreneur who went bankrupt.

So, how do we extricate oneself when we feel that only a 'FIRE EXTINGUISHER' will help us? First off, let's get into this realization.  When we make bad decisions repeatedly, life forces us into a crisis situation.  We are faced with a real life drama that pushes us to make decisions even in crisis mode.  Denial and procrastination DON'T become an option anymore but instead, how to get out of a crisis is something that we all need to know [as there is no other option].

And if you stomp me with a question as to which way will I feel better between overcoming a crisis or handholding someone and extricate him/her from a crisis, hands down I'll admit nothing beats that feeling of being a 'FIRE EXTINGUISHER' of someone when he/she was in dire need of that huge help.  What does become of you ?  In good faith, you even become a GAME CHANGER  📌📌📌

Put Your Own SPIN and Take on It

Put Your Own SPIN and Take on It

Oh, life CAN'T and SHOULDN'T be boring at all regardless of the prevailing circumstance.  And true to form, where we DON'T have to reinvent the wheel but that's NOT the end of the story.  Although it's true we DON'T have to reinvent the wheel, where possible, Put Your Own SPIN and Take on It on top of what you did NOT reinvent.  And that's not even an optional ADD-ON we are pushing for.

Let's talk about dancing.  Don't we have zillions of dances made popular all over the landscape.  Yet, why did TikTok become such a hit? Believe it or not, in 2021, TikTok 'dethroned' Google as the most popular domain.  A year earlier in 2020 Tiktok was ranked No. 7 while Google lorded it over the field.  Why did TikTok skyrocket globally? It's because it Put a SPIN on the dance itself.  The rest is history as the global community did embrace it witj aplomb, dislodging everyone else.

Let's take real-life scenarios.  If you're a student, are you contented just garnering high academic results?  Nope, that is NOT enough.  You gotta put your own SPIN and take on it so that in case of a tight race as the top of the graduating class, you could end at the top of the totem pole.  At your workplace, it is NOT enough that you do all the deliverables on time, on specs and within budget.  You gotta go the Xtra mile to put your own SPIN at work and take on it.  How can you stand out so that you can establish your own imprint in the workplace as someone who really stands out from the crowd?

Truth is, it's nice to be a good apple.  But if you're that apple in that crate, don't you want to stand out as the best apple out there ?  BTW, you don't need to be at the workplace to be able to PUT YOUR OWN SPIN ON IT.  Whatever it takes, figure out how you can end up as the best apple out there.  Just DON'T SETTLE for less.  NOT a second fiddle, where you can.

At the workplace, don't you want to etch your name as "Mr. QUALITY"  even if it means you are getting the ire of some colleagues when you end up catching QUALITY issues in their output.  When you develop that character and reputation to be detailed enough, leaving no stone unturned, that propels yourself to the next level.  And once you get this character-building mindset from within, you can push yourself to the next initiative and there is a likelihood that one foot of yours is already inside as you aim to succeed in your next endeavor 📌📌📌

When Changing Yourself is NOT Enough

When Changing Yourself is NOT Enough

Ooops this could be a controversial thread to touch but if it's worth it, why not?  Because CHANGE seems to be one of the most casual topics to discuss, let me convince you why this thread is worth it.  It's because many of us attempted and tried to CHANGE from the most petty to the most embedded CHANGE in our life.  End result?  Sixty percent of studies show that such CHANGES failed.  Why?  For various reasons, such CHANGES failed and when it failed, we need to realize what ails us When Changing Yourself is NOT Enough because we cannot leave things as it is when we can read the tea leaves all over the place.

In this challenging and nerve-wracking world, for exigency and for obvious reasons, we expect and need others to change but the caveat here is that for us to keep egging others to push with their own change, more often, there is an endemic need for us to change from within as well.  But diving into this ticklish issue, we need to drill and dice as to why we're facing that resistance to change, even from within ourselves.

Many of us dream to be like SUPERMAN but what have we done for us to deserve replicating that SUPERMAN dream?  So what causes us to resist change?  First off, when the reason for change is UNCLEAR [even to your own self].  Classic example are those who strongly believe the current way of doing things works well.  So you got flip that mindset before even dreaming about CHANGE.  Next, most of us FEAR the UNKNOWN and this is one of the most common reasons for resistance to CHANGE.  Then, that LACK of COMPETENCE creeps in.  With human nature, we seldom admit that if at all.  

Another stumbling block is being CONNECTED to the 'OLD WAYS'.  Being hostaged by old and hackneyed practices requires tremendous amount of effort to swing aroung even oneself.  And then comes LOW TRUST.  If and when you DON'T believe that you can competently manage a CHANGE, forget it.  You're TOAST.  Then that FAD mindset comes in when people think CHANGE is a FAD.  Then you'll have a problem at hand no less.  And how about when you reach that point of either saturation or exhaustion?  When we are overwhelmed by continuous CHANGE, we tend to go with the flow but within our heart, our motivation is LOW.

Yesirssssss IF YOU NEED to HELP YOURSELF, go HELP yourself   Overcome that resistance to change that can stem from perceptions that CHANGE is the last thing to do.  If you yourself feel that you will end up in a worse situation at the aftermath of a CHANGE, then it is highly unlikely that you can even get your own buy-in to CHANGE.  If you yourself is offering that hard core resistance to CHANGE, swing over to the BENEFITS and REWARDS of a CHANGE so you can see things crystal clear enough 📌📌📌

Haste Makes Waste, REALLY ?

Haste Makes Waste, REALLY ?

Haste Makes Waste, REALLY ?  Hoping that this won't be a hard sell, let me mention a research study from Vanderbilt University which study points everything to our brain.  To quote Professor Jeffrey Schall, our brain switches into a special mode when pushed to make rapid decisions.  The study says that if we can understand how our brain changes when we are pushed to respond faster, we have gone a long way to understand it.

Numerous behavioral and brain-mapping studies have supported that model which states that the brain uses the same basic model to make both deliberate and rapid decisions.  In order to shorten the decision-making time, our brain simply reduces the cumulative amount of neuronal activity it requires before making a decision.  Because the brain must make a snap decision based on less information than it uses for slower decisions, the likelihood that it will make mistakes increases.  Although it is easy to set up tests with human subjects that prompt them to switch between 

SPEEDY and ACCURATE decision-making, the method for measuring human brain activity do not have the required speed or resolution.  Scientists even developed a method for teaching monkeys to switch back and forth between FAST and ACCURATE decision-making in a task that involved picking out a target from an array of objects presented on a computer screen.  In one experimental condition, monkeys learned that only accurate responses would be rewarded.  In another condition, they learned that making some mistakes was acceptable as long as the decisions were fast.  In situations where we need to act fast, in order to act correctly, it's like being fast to hit the buzzer first.  But note that BUZZING and answering incorrectly is bad, but being slower than the other constant means you will never earn a reward.

That scenario departs from that standing theory that the brain uses the same process for all types of decisions.  To quote Professor Schall, that 'really flies in the face of what we thought we knew about decision-making.  Let's look at those game shows where the #1 criterion is to hit the buzzer first before giving the answer.  And although identical information is presented

to the brain, it gets analyzed differently under speed stress than under accuracy stress.  So why are we harping till now that Haste Makes Waste?  It is because when a mistake entails dire consequences but there are many situations in life when the cost of NOT acting is higher than making an ERROR in JUDGMENT.  With haste, the quality of decisions and outputs would end up compromised because our brains get more focused on SPEED at the expense of ACCURACY ❗❗❗

TRYING is NO Better than GETTING

TRYING is NO Better than GETTING

Who says and claims that TRYING is not that bad an effort ? Tell that to the marines because they will all dump that out the window.  In fact and in truth, TRYING is just the first step but the reason why it is NO Better than GETTING is because more often [and almost all studies have proven this correct] we would likely end up EMPTY HANDED when TRYING whereas when our mindset is focused towards GETTING something, the likelihood is that we will GET what we wanted to GET.  There's quite a circuitous explanation why indeed TRYING is NO Better than GETTING.

if you are an ardent believer that TRYING is really that acceptable, let us browse through this poster.  Do you want your pilot to TRY landing the plane?  Do you want your brain surgeon to TRY to be careful?  Do you want your wife to TRY to give birth to your baby?  

The famous American author Tony Robbins has gone to great lengths to explain why TRYING DOESN'T WORK.  Point is, when we say we are trying, we don't really have to do anything.  It also provides us with an EXCUSE for why we didn't accomplish the outcome we all wanted.  Where's the difference ?  It's either we do something or we don't do it.  Trying is really the same as NOT doing it.  It just makes it easier for us to let ourselves off the hook when we fail.

So what are we really TRYING?  TRYING to get in shape?  TRYING to improve a relationship?  TRYING to make more Sales Calls?  TRYING to improve your standing and credibility in the workplace?  Unfortunately, these 'TRYING' statements is like a parachute being readied so that when we fail, we can claim that we were TRYING?  So how?  DON'T ever use the word TRY.  While language is subtle, the words we use can program us to perform certain ways.  Using the wrong language can create an outcome we DON'T intend.  TRY is a worthless word that accomplishes nothing.  

Very true.  HARD WORK is NOT ENOUGH TO SURVIVE.  But that's a food for thought for now.  Meanwhile, DECIDE EITHER TO DO or NOT.  If you DON'T want to do something, fine.  DON'T do it.  but DON'T pretend that TRYING is the same as DOING or GETTING as they are completely different.  Lastly, COMMIT 100% to the OUTCOME you want.  Play FULL OUT.  DON'T quit.  DON'T settle for merely TRYING when you should be DOING and GETTING things done 📌📌📌

Circumstances DO NOT Make a Man, They Reveal Him

Circumstances DO NOT Make a Man, They Reveal Him

Optimists would claim that Circumstances Make a Man.  I beg to disagree because the circumstances itself DO NOT make a man. But instead, these circumstances will reveal that man.  Even the poet John Donne wrote that poem referring to mankind's intrinsically connected nature.  Despite his original intention, that poem also serves as an excellent illustration of man's dependency upon his culture to define him.  No man is an island unto himself and no man can be evaluated independent of the things which define his culture.  

A Samurai raised in Japan would not hold the same value as feudal Japan.  The circumstance surrounding a man's existence and placement in society are instrumental in defining him.  A person's value is ultimately dictated by their respective culture.  And that culture is ultimately a conglomeration of circumstances which have been grouped into the things that signify it.  If Bill Gates had been born two hundred years earlier on in a ranch in Texas, we would not remember him as such a great innovator because the skills he possessed wouldn't have made him a great man in a ranching society.

Ouch, this one-liner hurts but it's true.  When we get squeezed, the real YOU comes out.  When we feel the pressure, the true YOU surfaces.  So, we got to buckle down and really agree how should we handle pressure.  When this Covid pandemic broke out almost two years ago from today, we were all thrown off-guarded.  So, let's come down to brass tactics so we can have a good handle of PRESSURE.  First off, IDENTIFY YOUR TRIGGERS.  What causes you to get pressured ?  Is it when you see in your email inbox there is an email from your boss ?  Or is it when your cash flow starts to dry up ?

Those TRIGGERS could be issues that come out regularly. Or it could be one-off events like taking an exam or moving house.  Or it could be stressful events like serious problems in the workplace.  Next off, address some of the causes  Although there will probably lots of things in your life that you can't do anything about, there might be some practical ways you could do resolve or improve some of the issues that that are putting pressure on you.

To cap things all, this is non-negotiable.  We need to ACCEPT THE THINGS WE CANNOT CHANGE.  Oh well, it's never easy but accepting that there are some things happening to you that you probably can't do anything about will help you focus your time and energy more productively.  As an icing on the cake, let us endeavor to develop our RESILIENCE, which is not just your ability to bounce back but also your capacity to adapt in the face of challenging circumstances ⌛⏳⌛

We Do NOT Need a Recipe, Do We ?

We Do NOT Need a Recipe, Do We ?

We Do NOT Need a Recipe, Do We ?  From the time we popped out into this world, from our forefathers, grandparents down to our parents and relatives, recipes were tossed upon us.  Recipes for success, be it a successful career person, doctor or entrepreneur.  And no doubt those recipes for success were indeed a BIG HELP for us
 

But hold on, would we all agree that quite often, when a recipe becomes a BIG HIT, the next question we would hear is "WHO's THE CHEF", right ?  And why do we hear that, instead of us digging into the ingredients of the dishes ?  Simple.  In life, behind every success is a name, a person.  If there are still miracles in our worldly confines, let's set them apart because that's for the Vatican to validate during the sainthood process.  Otherwise, miracles are not part of success.

In essence, yes we all need a RECIPE for SUCCESS but let us get it embedded within us that the very first ingredient of our RECIPE for SUCCESS is us our very own self.  No amount of recipe can bring us forward than us being in the driver's seat.  It's us who will be steering our car along the road.  You could have gone through the best driving lessons and you could have logged 100,000 miles of driving.  But does that make you the driver guaranteed to reach the destination in true fashion ?  No sirrrrs.  You gotta grind damn hard for you to claim a piece of bragging rights and beat your chest when you finally hit pay dirt.

Surprisingly, many people find things challenging taking the first concrete step forward.  That becomes such a big hurdle for so many people but getting started is surprisingly simple, and that is, put one foot in front of the other and the next thing you know, you're moving and as we all know, a body in motion tends to stay in motion.

In a nutshell, often times we lose sight of the most basic ground rules towards that path to success.  Having your end goal CLEARLY DEFINED tops the list.  And while most of us get motivated at the start when EXCITEMENT hovers all over, CONSISTENCY will create the conviction. Goals ?  Set that bar higher than yesterday, than last year.  And DON'T DEVIATE and finally, start from where you are and build that foundation 📌📌📌