When You FAIL Your Test

When You FAIL Your Test

We all went through the wringer a zillion times, from the most petty tests down to driving tests and over to the nerve-wrenching tests which could have hit us either within our relationships or at the workplace or if you are an entrepreneur, at your business.  So, the question is NOT When You FAILED Your Test but instead, how did you handle when you faced the most serious tests in life and YOU FAILED ?  It has been proven over and over again that the hardest part in life is not when we go through a serious, major or critical test but rather, how did we handle things in the aftermath after we have FAILED our test 

Oh, we all have our fair share of bad days and weeks when nothing just seems to go right.  We also have times when we fail to achieve something that we really wanted and find it hard to cope.  Having said this, some people seem much more able to pick themselves up and dust themselves down after these experiences than others.  Note however that these people are NOT 'better' in any way.  

They have simply developed some positive habits and skills that help them to overcome failure and turn it into a more positive experience.  In fact, they use failing as a way to learn and improve.  UNDERSTANDING FAILURE is key.  Even Rudyard Kipling was famously quoted: 'SUCCESS AND FAILURE ARE TWO SIDES OF THE SAME COIN.

Whatever happens, you have to PICK YOURSELF UP and MOVE ON.  If we go by sports competitions, when we fail in an event, especially a major event at that, the failure can be utterly devastating.  It creates a similar impact if that failure happens in the workplace when you were angling either for a pay rise or a promotion only to see a colleague leapfrog you, whew

In brief, how do we handle failure ?  RECOGNIZE it and ACCEPT your EMOTIONS.  Next, DON'T ever take it as PERSONAL.  Third, DON'T even think of what anyone else thinks.  Next, just take the RIGHT AMOUNT of RESPONSIBILITY.  And with that failure, use it as a reason to kick your butt, to motivate you.  Thing is, DON'T think of failure as a failure.  Instead, think of it as life's way of showing you that you need to improve.  In particular, ask yourself WHAT YOU COULD HAVE DONE DIFFERENTLY ✅✅✅

Why Does the Picture Get Blurred ?

 Why Does the Picture Get Blurred ?

Why Does the Picture Get Blurred ?  Surely, everyone has the answer for this.  Regardless of your phone, whether it is the high-end iPhone 13 or the lowest budget phone, the answer for this question is a no-brainer.  The answer is because the camera lens is not IN FOCUS and there is no other answer to it.  In short, this is a classic example of a CAUSE and EFFECT.  Where the camera is not FOCUSED, it gets BLURRED.

Last night, we were visiting our relatives and right next to our nephews, this was exactly what we harped over and over again.  We were encouraging them to improve on their FOCUS so that things don't get BLURRED.  With the blurred picture as a perfect analogy, in life, when our focus gets either degraded or totally compromised, our situation in life gets to be blurred.  How many times did we get to end up in a BLURRED situation ?  I've been into several BLURRED situations in the past, all because I lost my FOCUS.

Now let's dissect what causes us to lose our FOCUS ?  How often do you experience mixed feelings of uncertainty, anxiousness, unorganized thoughts and being overwhelmed right in the middle of doing a task that you need to do ?  To be honest, it's your lack of focus that's hindering you from experiencing this as you attempt to work hard like you usually do.  In real life, if you are at the workplace, that lack of focus can cause you a demotion in your job and worst, you can be given the pink slip.  Studies though show that it is us ourselves who create or really have a ton of reasons why one finds it hard to focus and why it worsens.  To rattle off the most obvious reasons and causes:  I FEEL SLEEPY.  I FEEL TIRED TODAY.  I FEEL DOWN.  I'M FEELING DOWN NOW.  MY ROOM LOOKS MESSY. 

Nonetheless, these reasons are often the excuses a lot of us make.  But little do they know that it just led towards their negative approach in life to the point where they don't want to stay focused at the things they need to be done.  What we need to realize is that our habit of doing unnecessary things instead of accomplishing important goals for the day is the main reason why we lack FOCUS in the first place.  Frankly, there is NO NEED for a prescription-like advice because what ails us is a very powerful disease in our lifestyle and it has got nothing to do with our brain's condition.

Now, who's to blame for all these ?  Apologies I'll point my fingers to technology all over again.  Because of technology, we learned that MULTI-TASKING is feasible and it really increases by notches our productivity.  But did we realize that as humans, we can just execute one task at a time.  Not two or three tasks.  So, if we do , NOT want the Picture Get Blurred, FOCUS please ❗❗❗ 

Why Settling for LESS is OK !

Why Settling for LESS is OK !

Everywhere we hear 'DON'T SETTLE FOR LESS" but this is where I will play devil's advocate because that cliche does NOT hold water many times in our life because what matters is our realization that Settling for LESS is OK !  Too bad, our human frailties that veer towards being greedy more often leads us to a clouded judgment, ending up in a misjudgment.  Let's talk Why Settling for LESS is OK !

Couple of superficial reasons should nudge us that Settling for LESS is OK.  First off, 'LIVE WITHIN YOUR MEANS'.  It's nice to dream and keep up to the level of those Joneses but do face the mirror.  You just can't eat beyond what you can chew.  If you have to go home empty handed after going to the grocery, that's the harsh reality we have to face and accept.  But instead of it being a deterrent, it should ignite and motivation to work with double, triple or even ten times the effort level for you to reach that capability level that will then 'sync up' with the affordability.

Let's deep-dive into relationships.  At that point we are too idealistic, we knew the partner we wanted to be with, for the rest of our life.  At times, our vision for our partner-to be seems to be an epitome of the best attributes we dream of.  Hold back, though.   If you had the highest expectations of your future partner's traits and attributes, reassess yourself and challenge yourself if you possess such level of traits and attributes to begin with.  If you yourself will fall short of the criteria you pre-set for that future partner you have in your vision, RECALIBRATE your criteria and have yours aligned with it.

Truth is, we live a life that is multi-layered.  It is not even straightforward enough from end to end.  There are steep climbs and dangerous traps that will cause you to fall even fatally if you get off track.  Let's look at the work place.  Our clients demand too much.  So do our bosses.  On the other hand, here you are, a passive, laidback worker who never goes on full throttle but instead, someone satisfied enough as long as the engine starts and goes off.

Yesirrrs, that coveted trophy you have in your radar is not a long shot.  BUT it's NOT either a 'walk in the park',  You got to work for it, grind harder, kick your butt much harder than what is normal.  Remember, we should not lose sight of our constant goal, that is to turn things around for us to confidently claim why we won't  settle for LESS ❗❗❗

Celebrate Your SUMMITS [Then Seek New Ones]

Celebrate Your SUMMITS [Then Seek New Ones]

Yes, GO GO GO, let us celebrate your SUMMITS but then again, you gotta Seek New Ones].  Hold on, let's step back.  Let's align to agree as what SUMMITS are.  These are the peaks and pinnacle when we achieve the major success milestones in our journey.  Let me qualify, though, that SUMMITS do not refer to one-off small-small successes.  Instead, the SUMMITS we look for are the GAME-CHANGERS in our life journey.

Don't get me wrong though.  SMALL WINS MATTER.  BUT, we need to put this in the correct context simply because there are myriad of SMALL WINS but it behooves that we SEPARATE the CRUMBS from BREAD.  Having said this, a common human mistake is to lump all SMALL WINS even with the BIG WINS, and that's when the picture gets grossly distorted.

Why do we celebrate only after those BIG WINS ?  Reasons aplenty.  BIG WINS are those milestone achievements.  BIG WINS are embedded within the roadmap.  BIG WINS become proof that such success did come into fruition.  BIG WINS reflect back on the amount of effort and energy you exerted to achieve such success.  Many of us end up too mixed up even as we become too blurred ad unable to SEPARATE the CRUMBS from BREAD.  How many kampai's have we witnessed because the person is bound to his next milestone, only to fall flat along the way ?

So, what justifies us to celebrate our successes then ?  Developing one's SUCCESS MINDSET is needed because a large part of our success is about our state of mind so it is about having that SUCCESS MINDSET.  More than that, MOTIVATION is also closely inter-twined to our mindset because we are motivated by our successes.

FEELING GOOD should not be left out.  One of the best reasons to celebrate success is simply that it FEELS GOOD.  FEELING GOOD is what it's what it's all about.  We're driven to make changes in our lives because we want to feel better, be happier and FEEL GOOD.  And don't forget HAPPY CHEMICALS. because there's a reason why it FEELS GOOD when we CELEBRATE SUCCESS and it's to do with that chemicals in our brain.  And lastly, SHARE YOUR SUCCCESS.  Savor it together with whoever should be credited, be it your partner, your family, your mentor ❗❗❗

How Do You Stack Up TODAY versus YESTERDAY

How Do You Stack Up TODAY versus YESTERDAY

Will You Be Better TODAY Than YESTERDAY? Oh well, I am absolutely sure everyone wants to be better today than yesterday BUT here's the BUT.  Why is this a TALKING POINT now ?  It's because a plurality of us [if not a majority] are hardly leading a daily life where he is better off today than yesterday.  Instead, what happens most of the time, we have shortfallls, tasks not completed, targets not accomplished and even deliverables NOT DELIVERED.

So, HOW DO YOU STACK UP ?  It is a question we seem to constantly ask ourselves.  Our brains want to know how we are measuring up compared to everyone else.  People can spend their entire lives trying to determine where they stack on the proverbial totem pole of the human race but we would be disappointed to know that there is NO measurement against anyone else at all.  There was only the assessment of how their life measured up to their own persona potential.  When we compare ourselves to someone else, we will always have to rank ourselves as either superior or inferior to that other person and neither of those assessments will ever be factually accurate.  Admittedly, a person can be better than someone else at one particular task but that doesn't qualify them as superior.

Hmmm, in life, there is no 'superior' or 'inferior' and there is no measuring stick that ranks us in order of importance.  Everyone is exactly equal in importance to this world and it isn't possible from any one person to become more or less important than any other person.  So then, what do we aim for ?  How do we become better?  Or excellent?  Some ground rules.  LOOK AT YOURSELF, your TALENT and write them in a list.  And ask yourself how can you further enhance your capabilities ?

And let us not miss out to run a critical assessment of ourselves.  Make a list of the qualities we don't like about ourselves that we would like to change.  Example, are we impatient or judgmental or lazy ?  Write these qualities down and then set goals to help you change these into qualities you can be proud of.  Recognize that every day we are the results of every past.  WHATEVER WE WERE YESTERDAY IS WHAT WE ARE TODAY. So, if we are doing things today that will make us better tomorrow and we continue that pattern day after day, we are always going to be in the process of becoming a BETTER ME.

Here's the deal.  Coming to recognize every gift and talent we possess within us TAKES A LIFETIME.  Many of them surface during times of trial and difficult experience.  Many surface as we gain more wisdom.  Let's face it, we will likely never know everything we are truly capable of until life forces us to prove it to ourselves.  Our ULTIMATE GOAL IS TO BE BETTER TODAY THAN WE WERE YESTEDAY, so you would know HOW DO YOU STACK UP TODAY versus YESTERDAY 📌📌📌

Turning Things Around

Turning Things Around

Who has not been knocked off yet ?  Who has not stumbled down, sometimes with our face flat on the floor ?  Oh well, I can't remember the number of times I myself fell flat on my face.  And there were quite some points in my life when and where I felt i did hit rock bottom.  But alas, I'm still 'alive and kickin' so to speak.  Might wonder, did a miracle from heaven just went down to save me ?  Or was there something like Turning Things Around ?  Yesirrrrs, it was NOT a 'walk in the park'.  During those lowest points, imagine yourself being bludgeoned to near-death even as you reach out to cling to whatever thread or string because you had one foot down below already ?

Good grief.  As the old cliche goes, when you're down, there's NO OTHER WAY TO GO BUT UP.  Sharing here my real-life approach to ensure that Turning Things Around isn't just a slogan.  First and foremost, frustration kicks in, no doubt about it.  Fine, VENT YOUR FRUSTRATION.  While it is not health to nurse anger and keep it alive, nor is it healthy to keep all your frustration inside and just try to fake a smile, find a way to release that anger.  Talk it out.  Ventilate and let it out.    

Never forget that you're NOT alone.  Even if no one is nearby you having that same issue, rest assured there are many other people who are going through the pain you now have.  Recognizing that you're not the only one who has been knocked down can help you avoid seeing yourself as a helpless and hapless victim.  

Now, CONSIDER WHAT IS PRODUCTIVE.  Screaming and shouting won't drive your problems away, whether you're losing your cool or thinking about things with a calm, rational mindset.  Being calm will help you see what you need to do to get out of that current mess you're in.  Then FOCUS ON YOUR AUTONOMY.  No matter how your life's narrative unfolds, you always have a choice when it comes how you react.  You can face absolutely anything that happens to you if you make the choice not to let them destroy you and to find a way to make things better.

OBJECTIFY THE SITUATION.  Take a careful effort to extract your feelings from your view of the current circumstances as that will help you gain a much more objective perspective.  Remember the world isn't actually trying to hurt you and that in fact it can help you heal if you let it.  Then TAKE ACTION IMMEDIATELY and DON'T BE AFRAID TO ASK FOR HELP.  If you are putting up a wall for you to be Turning Things Around, then you're hitting the wall dude ❗❗❗

When You Get Hit with a BRICK on Your FACE

When You Get Hit with a BRICK on Your FACE

Where you ever got hit with a BRICK on your face in the past [not literally though] ? I am quite absolutely sure that regardless of the nature of that 'BRICK that hits your FACE, it would be disastrous and ruinous if not cataclysmic.  A major health issue.  Death in the family.  Major financial crisis.  A major setback in a business.  A relationship issue that may lead to a breakup.  A crisis at work that may lead you either for a disciplinary action or worse, you are given the pink slip.  Just one too many worst case scenarios we dread in life.

Now, to set expectations, we are NOT trying to be SUPERMAN when dealing with our problems.  In fact and in truth, we CANNOT solve our problems but the least we can do is be prepared to deal with the most manageable problems in life.  Here we go.  FINANCIALS.  That problem will never go away because we live in an uncertain world and a financial crisis may just happen at any time in our life.  FIX ?  Acknowledge and accept that crisis and prepare for a RECOVERY PLAN, that's it.

HEALTH.  Oh, this is not far-fetched to happen because our body system works round the clock [even when we're asleep] and worse, if you don't maintain healthy habits, health deterioration is not far to happen.  FIX ?  Besides immediate lifestyle changes, seek medical help ASAP, pronto.  BTW, just more than a month ago, I hit a health crisis but it has now been fixed.

RELATIONSHIP/FAMILY.  Hmmmm, nothing is sweeter than love and family but note it could be a source of PAIN for some because like it or note, we all have human IMPERFECTIONS in our relationships.  FIX ?

Ideally, the best thing to do is prevent those relationship problems from happening but when it does, FACE REALITY and take steps to address such problems because it won't just dissipate in thin air if you thought it will.

Yesirrrrrrs, we need a SECOND LIFE, if we may.  Regardless if the last straw, last thread is about to run kaput, we do NOT have a choice but to FIX and clean up the MESS we are in.  What's a given here is that when a BRICK hits our FACE, let us summon all the remaining energy we have in life because that's near the curtain call ✅✅✅

Can You be Back if You NEVER LEFT ?

Can You be Back if You NEVER LEFT ?

In our topsy-turvy world, it's not surprising if we ourselves sometimes are LOST, like when we can't even figure things out if we are HERE or THERE ? What causes all this bedlam and confusion to inhibit us from figuring out our whereabouts ?  As often times, that causes us to get confronted with the fact that HOW can you be back if you NEVER LEFT ?

Let's take a real life scenario most common to happen anyway.  Relationships flounder.  Hearts get hurt and later you would hear from the protagonist that he/she will pick up the pieces and continue to live a normal life thereon.  But many of us fail to realize that it is impossible to pick up the pieces if until that very moment, you still struggling from your crisis and unable to accept that what's over is over. So, how can you be back if you NEVER LEFT ?

Often, we know where we are and we know where we wanna go and be but have you not witnessed some who are very much aware of where they wanna go [e.g. they want to live a happy life with all his/her successes wrapped around him/her but in those moments when and where he/she has been able to achieve the successes he/she aimed for, that hollowed emptiness remains within himself.  Why oh why ?  Hmmm, we got to figure this out because otherwise, how can you be back if you NEVER LEFT in the first place ?

True, this poster is damn right, it could be REAL IF IT COMES BACK.  So, let's call a spade a spade.  If you committed a huge blunder in life, be man enough to own it.  If you caused a huge failure at work, be man enough to accept it but in the workplace, accepting it is NOT sufficient.  You got to proactive propose how to fix and volunteer a commitment that you will endeavor so that the same huge mistakes do not recur.  If you're an entrepreneur, if you ended up delivering a defective product or rendered a sloppy or lousy service, volunteer a post-mortem and to top it all. pledge to your stakeholders that that would not happen again.

But hey, pardon my insistence and persistence because in real life, it is extremely tough for one to leave things back and restart on a clean slate.  Why ?  That's where the intangibles would factor in.  Sickness.  Chronic pain.  Depression.  Health issues.  Even the impact of this pandemic., Indeed, how can we be back if we NEVER LEFT ❓❓❓  

Are You DONE Today With What You Planned YESTERDAY

Are You DONE Today With What You Planned YESTERDAY

No sirrrrrs, we have not ran out of topics to discuss but instead, I thought this is one of those low-hanging fruits which most of us tend to ignore because it seems a non-issue.  NOT UNTIL we trip, we stumble, we skid, then we realized that today is another day and how time flies, yesterday is gone and there's no way we can flip the calendar.  So, don't get flustered when someone confronts us if Are You DONE Today With What You Planned YESTERDAY ?  Too bad, these exceptions don't get into our radar.  Probably [or likely because there is always a TOMORROW].

What could explain our lackadaisical and passive behavior when something slipped us ?  Well, this is a no-brainer.  It's simply because there's always a TOMORROW to come.  But are we not aware that supposedly, that come next day, there is a default set deliverables on our plate.  Regrettably, most of us [wrongly] believe that come next day, our plate defaults to EMPTY, whew.

More often, 98% of us all are NOT done yet when the day is over.  This is not a scare though.  Studies have shown that it's pretty acceptable why we can't hit a 100% completion rate when we call it a day.  WHY ?  Because a plan is a plan.  And as defined, plans may be executed to the letter but it doesn't guarantee that the results will end up 100% up to specs, up to expectations.  So where's the beef ?  That worry does not spring up yet come next day. We got to wait for a couple of days to pile up and before we know it, a week or more is over and all we can manage to do is to scratch our head.

No need to do the math.  Let's peruse over the common triggers of slippages in our daily deliverables.  #1 culprit is the fact that we didn't have a list of those deliverables and for the minority who do scribble that list, there is no priority at all.  What else do we expect but slip ups and overflows.  What else ?  More often it boils down to our time management.  Who amongst us allocate slices of his time ?

Oh, BTW, do we agree with this poster.  Me thinks YES.  We can practically do anything but the common storyline is that many are started but not all get completed.  Have we had that eagerness and excitement to start off  with a new task as the adrenalin rush becomes too difficult to stop, only to end up somewhere in a dirt road, finding us slumped when that euphoric feeling has significantly subsided ?  What's our very basic lesson here ?  It all boils down to PLANNING, PRIORITIES and a no-nonsense TIME MANAGEMENT.  Let's go dude ❗❗❗

Get the Most BANG For Your BUCK

Get the Most BANG For Your BUCK

Hmmm, when we're talking about $$$$, this should be quite interesting, right ?  What stuff deserves more of our time than $$$$.  And not to sound optimistic, I still feel we will all sing in unison that whatever it is, we need to Get the most BANG for our BUCK.  This should not even be argued or debated.

Nevertheless, let us dissect why this thread is worth our time.  Primus inter pares, first among equals, we all work hard for every buck we got, right ?  Because that's hard earned, straight from our sweat.  Even the regular habitues at the Las Vegas Strip work hard.  Truth is, they work probably ten times harder than our typical level of effort.  These guys at the Las Vegas Strip would even book their room at those hotels [like the MGM] because every 24 hours, they would just catch enough sleep then shower before rushing back to the casino floor.  But for 80% of the population who are part of the workforce, it's just damn imperative that we Get the most BANG for our BUCK.  

If we rattle off the ground rules, everything starts by weighing things out.  Do an apples to apples comparison [NOT a lemon to apple] so that your end-result will be closer to the accurate assessment when all the UPsides are mapped against all the DOWNsides.  To get the most BANG for our BUCK should be part of our mantra.

Even if we take a step back to our ancestors where commerce was pursued via barter, the rule of GIVE and TAKE was prevailing across all the players.  When and where you end up giving more and taking less, what do you do next ?  WALK AWAY, period.  Why struggle to come up with a decision when the GIVE versus TAKE is as clear as the sky and the ground ?  There's one catch though.  When you assess your possible UPside, it must NOT be grounded on sheer speculation because you will be raising the risks and stakes to your disadvantage.  Get the most BANG for our BUCK.  

Yesirrrreeee, this poster says SPEND SMART.  It's nothing less than that.  And if you ask how can we SPEND SMART, go back to your weighing scale, do the math, run the apples-to-apples comparison.  But here's a word of caution.  Please do not run that exercise if it's moot and academic.  If you have pretty decided on something, it means you are cutting corners and likely raising the risks that you will end up shortchanged when you don't Get the most BANG for our BUCK.  This may be a no-brainer but it still makes sense to wake us up Dude 📌📌📌