Is SELF-CONTROL Good Or Bad?

Is SELF-CONTROL Good Or Bad?

For alignment, let's agree that SELF-CONTROL is that ability to control our feelings, emotions, and reactions.  Many people struggle with SELF-CONTROL.  For example, we need SELF-CONTROL when it comes to staying off social media while at work, sticking to a budget, regulating sugar intake. So, is SELF-CONTROL Good Or Bad?  Scientists continue to study the importance of SELF-CONTROL as a force we can tap into for a more successful , satisfying life.  So, can we further enhance this❓❓❓

Having said this, there is a NOT so raging debate going on whether SELF-CONTROL is GOOD or BAD?  Indeed, it is believed to be key to success in many aspects of life, whether that's getting a promotion at work, sticking to your workout regime or resisting that constant temptation of a sweet treat WHEN you're watching WHAT you eat.  BUT NOT to dampen our hopes on it, the 2018 theory of Professor Thomas Lynch says that high SELF-CONTROL may NOT always be a GOOD thing.  Worse, for some, it could be linked to certain mental health problems.  That Lynch Theory says that everyone of us leans more toward one of the two personality types, namely, UNDERCONTROL or OVER-CONTROL📗📙📘

That theory says further that the way we tend to lean depends on many factors, and that includes our genes, the behavior that people around reward and discourage, our life experiences, and the coping strategies we use in everyday life.  Importantly, being UNDERCONTROLLED or OVERCONTROLLED is neither GOOD or BAD.  While it makes us more likely to behave in a certain way, most of us are psychologically flexible and can adapt to the different situations we're put in.  So, regardless whether we're OVERCONTROLLED or UNDERCONTROLLED, this flexibility helps us deal with life's challenges and setbacks in a constructive way💧💧💧

BUT experts caution us that both UNDERCONTROL and OVERCONTROL can become problematic.  And this usually happens WHEN a combination of biological, social, and personal factors makes us much less flexible.  Most of us are probably more familiar with WHAT problematic UNDERCONTROL looks like.  People WHO are highly UNDERCONTROLLED may have few inhibitions and struggle to control their emotions.  Their behavior may become unpredictable as it is often dependent on the mood they're in.  This can NEGATIVELY affect their relationships, education, work, finances and even their health❎❎❎

WHAT's scary is PROBLEMATIC OVERCONTROL.  Unfortunately, OVERCONTROL isn't talked about as much.  This may be because OVERCONTROLLED traits, such as persistence, the ability to make plans and stick to them. , striving for perfection and being in CONTROL of emotions are often highly regarded in our society.  BUT when OVERCONTROL becomes an issue, it can be damaging in many areas of life.  Our takeaways?  Think of OVERCONTROL scenarios like overly limiting your sugar intake till your sugar-levels will dip way below of WHAT is required.  You'll be rushed to the E.R. surely [I went through that nightmare when it happened to a relative].  So, WHAT's our take?  Take a BALANCED approach in life, dude✅✅✅

Are We MAGNETIC Enough?

Are We MAGNETIC Enough?

Are We MAGNETIC Enough?  Easy question.  YES we are absolutely MAGNETIC, regardless whether we are on the correct OR wrong PATH in life.  And this is WHEN it becomes crucial and imperative that we need to be on the RIGHT PATH.  Back to being MAGNETIC, it is true that NOT everyone is born with a MAGNETIC personality because generally, that is an evolving process of becoming more MAGNETIC, influential and persuasive.  It is that ability to attract and control people's attention. MAGNETIC people have that certain charisma and presence that makes them stand out from the rest.  They are able to influence and persuade others with ease, sometimes effortlessly📗📙📘

To ease my selling of that MAGNETIC personality, let's walk down on its most obvious benefits.  One of the most obvious benefits of people with that MAGNETIC personality is that typically, they are more successful in both their professional and even personal lives.  And they are more likely to be promoted and achieve their goals.  They are also more likely to have fulfilling and satisfying relationships✅✅✅

Oh yes, another obvious thing, MAGNETIC personalities generally seem more likeable and even attractive to others.  They are able to make a positive impression and build strong relationships.  They are also good at networking and making connections.  This can be beneficial in both their personal and even professional lives.  Oh yes, these MAGNETIC personalities are perceived to be more energetic and enthusiastic and are optimistic and have a positive outlook on life.  That energy becomes contagious and it inspires others to be more POSITIVE as well💧💧💧

People with MAGNETIC personalities are always perceived to have that STRONG presence and are able to capture people's attention.  They are interesting and engaging speakers as well.  They also have a lot of charisma.  This can be beneficial in both their personal and professional lives.  So, the question worth asking is, HOW can we develop that MAGNETIC personality❓❓❓

Our takeaways?  Primero, we need to know WHAT we want very clearly.  Feel your emotions.  Segundo, let us believe strongly that you can make your wishes come true.  That is more than just being POSITIVE.  WHICH means having a strong belief in your own worth and the endless possibilities around you.  I once read this comment:  THE UNIVERSE WORKS LIKE A RADIO.  WHEN you think POSITIVELY and CONFIDENTLY, you will attract GOOD THINGS into your life.  Yes, to be MAGNETIC helps✅✅✅

No Shortage of OVERTHINKING

No Shortage of OVER-THINKING

Seriously, OVERTHINKING is as common as the natural air we got. No Shortage of OVER-THINKING indeed.  There is simply NO shortage of situations for us to OVERTHINK in today's rat race-based world.  Sometimes, you might feel like you're the only one lying awake at night, dwelling on a decision you made earlier that day OR worrying about tomorrow's To-do List.  BUT, hey dude, you're NOT alone because as per researches, 73% of 25 to 35 years old and 52% of ages 45 to 55 all OVERTHINK📗📙📘

According to studies, in majority of cases studied, OVERTHINKING could manifest or surface out as RUMINATION, which often involves perseverating on events of the PAST and even the PRESENT with a NEGATIVE mindset.  WHETHER your tendency of overthinking takes you into the past or focuses on the future, experts counsel us that there are POSITIVE ways to reframe our thoughts with considerably LESS STRESS😑😑😑

BUT before this thread goes out of hand, experts assure us that OVERTHINKING by itself is NOT a mental illness at all!  Instead, it is associated with conditions including depression, anxiety, eating disorders and substance use disorders.  On the other hand, RUMINATION can be common in people WHO have chronic pain and chronic illness as well, taking the form of NEGATIVE thoughts about that pain and healing from it.  Sometimes, worry and RUMINATION may even trick our brain into associating itself with something beneficial💧💧💧

Experts advise us to watch out for these tell-tale signs:

• You fixate on NEGATIVE feedback
• You tend to bring up PAST FAILURES
• You're overly cautious to AVOID mistakes

We are further advised that since WORRYING can't really be avoided [because that is part of REALITY], consider to schedule a 'WORRY TIME'.  Instead of letting RUMINATION overrun your entire day, confine it to a manageable slot, like 15 to 30 minutes✅✅✅

Another hole in the ground we sometimes fell through is what experts call 'FUTURE TRIPPING' where we are preoccupied in anticipation of WHAT lies ahead.  Tell-tale signs?

• Exerting EXCESSIVE ENERGY to plan out
• Difficulty to celebrate small successes because you are so PREOCCUPIED with the future

Dude, there is NO shortage in OVERTHINKING but you got to halt and stop it, period❗❗❗

Let's BREAK AWAY From Our BAD HABITS

Let's BREAK AWAY From Our BAD HABITS

No sirrrrs, I DON'T come clean enough.  Because I had my fair share of BAD HABITS.  BUT who says that everything is cast in stone?  NOT true.  NOT at all.  So, Let's BREAK AWAY From Our BAD HABITS.  In our gruelling daily lives, how often we ask ourselves, WHERE did the hours go?  WHY did the tasks take that long?  WHY do we feel unfulfilled at the end of the day?  Could we find the common denominator for all those interrogatives?  Yesirrrrrs, you hit the nail on its head.  The common culprit are our time-wasting habits💎💎💎

If you're perplexed, we DON'T need to dig deep to figure out the most common culprits.  LIKE your endless scrolling. Raise your hand if you've ever stumbled down the 'infinite scroll rabbit hole' on social media.  We all know the recurring pattern.  You just wanted to check on a message for a while but it turns out it stretches to an hour of mindless swiping of countless checks here and there.  Oh Oh, TIME EVAPORATES, leaving you with a vague sense of unease and the nagging feeling you accomplished nothing.  BTW, DON'T be fooled by those well-curated 'endless feeds'.  And WHEN you haven't subscribed, you'll get prompted to FOLLOW and SUBSCRIBE📗📙📘

So, let's NOT feel or act surprised that social media is here to stay and everything about it is designed to be addictive, hijacking your attention and turning you into a passive consumer of content.  Think of it like a casino slot machine, dispensing DOPAMINE hits every few scroll, keeping you hooked just long enough for another click.  BUT hold on, ISN'T it that social media is damn great to be connected to?  Absolutely.  Of course.  It is a powerful tool for communications and our communities.  BUT just like that tempting delicious slice of cake, too much can be detrimental.  We WON'T eat an entire cake in one sitting, right?  WHY do we subject ourselves to an unlimited buffet of digital distractions❓❓❓

NOW, here's the harsh truth.  That infinite scroll is a silent productivity KILLER.  Psychologists concluded in their studies that constant distractions shatter our ability to focus, leaving us fragmented and incapable of deep thinking.  It's like trying to write a novel in a crowded coffee shop, that constant noise will drown out any meaningful thought.  So, how do we BREAK AWAY From Our BAD HABITS?  Easier said than that BUT start with, SETTING BOUNDARIES.  Treat social media like a delicious dessert, a small indulgence to be enjoyed in moderation💧💧💧

Fearing BOREDOM?  Embrace BOREDOM.  The fear of missing out [FOMO] is a powerful tool used to keep us glued to our screens.  BUT experts say that BOREDOM can be a breeding ground for creativity and critical thinking.  Our takeaway?  Let your mind wander, step away from the screen and see WHAT sparks of inspiration might ignite you.  Let's BREAK AWAY From Our BAD HABITS❎❎❎

Need To REBOOT?

Need To REBOOT?

Seriously, when do we REBOOT or RESET in our life?  Yes it is true, we all face FAILURE at one point OR another, whether it is in our home life, our work life  and in our daily personal lives.  And WHEN we experience a major FAILURE, finding a strength to move forward can be one of the most difficult parts of that process in life.  Now, of all stuffs in life, the most challenging thread we can pursue is discussing FAILURE because sometimes, OR likely most of the time, once we are hitting the floor, that path towards recovery may seem to be a very steep hill OR mountain to climb📗📙📘

So, let's play out real-life scenarios.  FAILURE hits us.  WHAT then?  WHAT now?  Psychologists advise that, first and foremost, let us LOOK BACK as to HOW YOU DID IT BEFORE.  Look back and remember a time when you were able to move past a significant challenge.  WHAT motivated you that time?  WHAT kept you going?  WHAT made you resilient?  WHAT learning from this past experience can you apply to this current situation❓❓❓

Moving on, let us OPENLY accept FAILURE as part of our learning process.  BTW, be forewarned that that learning process will last our lifetime.  With every FAILURE, there is always a window of opportunity to turn it around.  You must NOT miss that opportunity while wallowing in your grief [arising from a FAILURE].  Instead, get ready for the next upcoming opportunity by FOCUSING on establishing a plan to apply the LESSONS LEARNED.  And WHEN you get hit with FAILURE, remember that an action FAILED and it was NOT you FAILING📌📌📌

And before you end up sulking in a corner for that FAILURE, go FAST FORWARD and think about your future COMEBACK PLAN.  Looking back my life, when I now looked back, with clarity and certainty, I know WHEN I have been proud of my response and WHEN I wish I handled things differently.  So, these days when I get hit with a FAILURE, I would always look back and plot a COMEBACK PLAN💧💧💧

Our takeaway?  Experts strongly encourage us to use POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONs and they recommend that a first strategy is to 'short circuit' your NEGATIVE THOUGHTS by using POSITIVE SELF-AFFIRMATIONS.  Those POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS include any phrase that reminds you of WHO you are as a person and serve as an encouragement to stay resilient in the face of adversity.  Experts claim that SELF AFFIRMATIONS [like 'I AM ENOUGH' or 'I BELIEVE IN MY DREAMS'] serve to boost our confidence, broaden our perspective, decrease the impact of a potential NEGATIVE event will have on you and from a bigger perspective, it should promote our optimistic outlook❗❗❗

Beware: Latest AI Scams !

Beware:  Latest AI Scams !

AI [ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE] has come and it's everywhere!  More than that, it is reaching latest unprecedented heights, which, for lack of a better adjective, are terrifying updates [call it PROGRESS] of AI.  You might ask, what is there to be Beware about the latest AI scams !  The past months, I did hear about AI voice cloning and that caused me to fall off my chair but hold your breath for the latest AI scam📌📌📌

In today's Channelnewsasia commentary titled "A US $25 million Hong Kong deepfake scam shows new AI risks in video calls".  How did the scammers pull off this feat?  Oh Oh, these scammers used artificial intelligence to disguise themselves on a video conference and swipe US $25 million from a Hong Kong-based company.  So, the perplexing question is:  How is ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE going to the next level?  Let's take a step back.  When did this ZOOM calls got introduced into our lives?  Remember, ZOOM calls all started when we were all got locked down by Covid-19 pandemic❎❎❎

And to see that these AI SCAMS did not come from a BIG BANG thing, it modestly started when we heard about SCAMS, it was revolving around voice cloning.  So, at that point, we were alerted and oriented how to spot and detect phishing emails and resist the urge to click on some dodgy attachments.  Of course, despite all our awareness, hackers, fraudsters and scammers need just one person out of hundreds to inadvertently download a malware needed to 'tunnel' into a corporate network💎💎💎

Ironically, much as the quantum leaps in technology brought us forward way beyond the brick and mortar days, with ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE-powered video tools, they have broken ground and achieved breakthroughs [if we may ironically call it such] by moving into territories we all [wrongly] thought to be considered SAFE enough.  WHAT this tells us are the significant strides DEEPFAKE TECHNOLOGY has really developed, all within the past one year.  And while it seems to be more science fiction than anything else, these elaborate frauds are now relatively easy to set up.  Scary indeed💧💧💧

Our takeaway?  Let's NOT be complacent at all, just because maybe you've never been a scam victim [YET] because, knock on wood, all these deepfake scams will hit hard on us at those moments when we feel either relaxed or just so cockily confident.  How scary things can be?  Go to Google now and openly, it gives the step-by-step guide how to create a deepfake video.  Scary days indeed.  Let's be wary of all these😌😌😌

Go, DREAM BIG

Go, DREAM BIG

I've blurted on this many times and I WON'T get tired repeating a zillion times.  Go, DREAM BIG, no less than that.  WHY?  There could me mile-long reasons WHY but if I may simplify a complex situation.  Everything starts with one's DREAM.  HOW fiery are you.  HOW ambitious are you.  HOW aggressive are you.  HOW BIG is your DREAM?  Pardon me BUT for the next few minutes, we'll circle around to DREAM BIG📗📙📘

Indeed, DREAM BIG about what you want to achieve.  DREAM BIG about the life you want to lead and the difference you want to make.  DREAM BIG about the person you want to be.  DREAM BIG because you might surprise yourself.  DREAM BIG because until do, you'll have no idea WHAT you're capable of.  In brief, there's just NO excuse NOT to DREAM BIG.  If you are still NOT sold to DREAM BIG, let's spend a bit of time, hoping that everyone of us will get aligned that for us to reach the farthest we can go, DREAM BIG no less💎💎💎

#1 reason that should push us to DREAM BIG is that, let's agree, there's LESS COMPETITION out there.  Look no farther than Elon Musk.  How come he's been a successful trailblazer in his business initiatives?  Simple.  There is just NO LESS COMPETITION but frankly, there is really NO COMPETITION.  In fact, there are far fewer applications for the huge, life-changing roles, contracts and grants than there are for the smaller ones.  And frankly, it's LONELY UP THERE💧💧💧

Sadly, many people talk themselves OUT of aiming high.  They settle for LESS, make excuses and very rarely leave their comfort zone.  They believe that someone else will be better qualified so they DON'T submit an application.  Hey dude.  Submit an application.  Put your name in the hat, and make the case for WHY it should be YOU.  BACK YOURSELF and DREAM BIG.  No else dares❎❎❎

#2, in case you fall short of that BIG DREAM, trust me, falling just short will still be great.  Try to picture hearing the best news you could ever hear, whether it is for your life OR your career.  Then, imagine falling just short of that.  Still sounds good, right? So, the BIGGER your plan is, the higher is that probability that your results will still be somewhere UP THERE.  To borrow that old cliche, SHOOT FOR THE MOON.  IF YOU FAIL, YOU'LL STILL LAND ON THE STARS, dude✅✅✅

When To WORRY About WORRYING

When To WORRY About WORRYING

Supposedly, WORRYING is NOT worth our time OR even be our thread today.  Simply because everyone feels afraid OR worried at times, BUT if these feelings begin to literally TAKE OVER your life, then we have a problem.  THEN, it is worth reconsidering that we spend a bit of time on this thread: When To WORRY About WORRYING.  NOT to raise alarms, though, the first threshold we should be wary to breach is what experts call GENERALIZED ANXIETY DISORDER [GAD]💧💧💧

Problem is, we often endure the discomfort caused by GAD or we [wrongly] think that this is pretty normal.  In the end, this does NOT get flagged down as a problem.  BUT experts are warning us that if GAD is left alone to manifest, it may potentially lead to serious health problems [such as high blood pressure, depression and even addictive behavior like excessive drinking].  Admittedly, people with GAD will be unable to shake off that feeling that something BAD might happen and that they DON'T seem to be prepared .  They may even worry to excess about missing an appointment, losing a job, or having an accident📙📗📘

Surprisingly [and shockingly, some people even WORRY about WORRYING too much.  Now, before we miss out those tell-tale signs, allow me to share the below symptoms of GENERALIZED ANXIETY DISORDER:

• Persistent, excessive extended WORRY on several things
• Fatigue and difficulty sleeping OR restlessness
• Trouble concentrating on task at hand
• Muscle tension
• Irritability
• That feeling tense

So, WHAT should we do?  Experts advise that first things first, let us acknowledge when we SEEM to be manifesting any of these common symptoms.  And that's our dilemma.  Many of us understand WHAT's causing their FEAR + WORRY but DON'T often want to face it.  Experts forewarn as well that physical symptoms can come in different forms and shapes.  And that includes racing heart, dry mouth, upset stomach, muscle tension, sweating, trembling and even irritability💥💥💥

Our takeaway?  WHETHER your doctor will advise you for medical treatment OR therapy, the 'ball is on your court'.  NOT to bad mouth pharmacology but medicines will offer you much greater symptom relief over time BUT there are potentially intangible help in the form of avoiding tendencies to EXAGGERATE difficulties OR unnecessarily concocting pessimistic assumptions, which exacerbate one's condition.  This is WHEN we need to WORRY on WORRYING❎❎❎

How To Leverage On Your Weaknesses

How To Leverage On Your Weaknesses

Have you ever felt like the weight of the world rests on your shoulders?  I can sense it because I've BEEN THERE, HAD THAT.  So, in life, we are all exposed to to various trying moments.  Like when we had to endure a stressful job interview.  What that kind of experience tells us is to be strong and believe in ourselves.  So, How do we Leverage On Your Weaknesses📗📙📘

Going through the wringer, sometimes fumbling BUT quite often surviving [and sometimes barely], we would learn how powerful confidence can be.  It's the kind of stuff that will keep you going, no matter what happens.  So, how do we move from hereon?  First off, let us accept our VULNERABILITY.  We all have that raw and tender side, the one that whispers fears, doubts and longings.  And indeed it is tempting to keep it under lock and key, to build a fortress around our hearts and project an image of unyielding strength💎💎💎

BUT WHAT IF we are told that VULNERABILITY isn't a weakness after all?  That it is that kind of a superpower we often overlook?  Let's visualize that daring tightrope walker, suspended up high above the ground.  Their every step is a calculated risk, a delicate dance between control and surrender.  They could easily build a safety net and close themselves off from the possibility of a potential fall.  BUT, without that VULNERABILITY, that openness to the UNKNOWN, there wouldn't be the breathtaking beauty of their performance💧💧💧

I came across this anonymous one-liner which kind of hit me:  VULNERABILITY IS THE COURAGE TO BE YOU.    So, it is NOT about spilling your secrets to every passerby but it is about acknowledging your humanness, flaws and all.  It is about showing up authentically, even WHEN it feels scary and trusting that your story deserves to be heard.  VULNERABILITY is that fertile ground where our human creativity gets uncorked and unraveled.  It is that raw material that somehow sparks and ignites our inner self.  And WHEN we dare to be VULNERABLE, we open ourselves up to possibilities😀😀😀

Our takeaway?  Let's go back the last time you shared a deep fear OR insecurity with a trusted friend.  HOW was it?  Did you feel the 'wall crumble'?  Did you feel much closer and more understood OR did you retreat further into your emotional isolation?  Thing is, our VULNERABILITIES are NOT our character flaws.  Instead, they are the cracks and chinks in our armor that let the light in, the imperfections that make us uniquely beautiful.  Accepting them ISN'T a sign of weakness BTW.  Instead, it is an act of immense courage, a declaration that we choose to live authentically even WHEN its risky.  After all, this is HOW TO LEVERAGE ON YOUR WEAKNESS, dude✅✅✅

Is Lost Memory Recoverable?

Is Lost Memory Recoverable?

Is Lost Memory Recoverable?  Yesirrrrrrrrs, the good news is that, akin to the lost data happening in our laptops and gadgets, LOST MEMORY is not all given up as LOST, thanks to the numerous medical studies.  Ironically, sometimes MEMORY of certain experiences remain crystal clear for life, like the moment you said "I DO".  Of course, other significant memories from long ago can be harder to recall BUT they may still be with you📗📙📘

This is worth noting, if I may reference some of the medical studies.  Of the many memories you accumulate every day, only those marked as 'MEANINGFUL' are recorded in your brain's "long-term" files.  Experts claim that we have a system in our brains that tags MEMORY  that are important in some way so we'll remember them in the future.  Surprise-surprise.  There are two things that tag a memory as special💎💎💎

EMOTIONS top the list.  Like getting married is an example of highly emotional events.  Experts claim that in that circumstance, a whole host of brain chemicals become active as these memories are being 'RECORDED'.  Close to the heels are memories of personal significance like WHEN you remember WHAT you had for breakfast this morning and WHAT clothes you wore yesterday.  BUT if we were asked about those in a few days or a month ago, you'll have NO MEMORY  for them because they're NOT just that important to you📌📌📌

Here's the catch though.  While experts claim that we can retrieve some of the significant LOST memory, aging affects retrieval.  And sometimes, even special or important MEMORIES  are harder to remember.  WHEN memory goes 'downhill' after age 30, to borrow medical jargon, by the time we're in our 50s, the frontal lobes [which are in charge of searching for memories] DON'T work as well as they used to be.  And here's a medical explanation that runs parallel to technology.  'BY NOT REVISITING THE MEMORY, YOU'RE TELLING YOUR BRAIN ITS NOT IMPORTANT'💧💧💧

Our takeaway?  We need to 'JOG' our memory because when we're younger, an internal cue [just thinking of something] can help retrieve a memory BUT when we're older, we rely more on external cues to retrieve memories, like a sound OR an image.  To reactivate our old memory, we must think about the senses that were engaged as the MEMORY was being recorded.  So dude, all is NOT LOST, literally speaking😀😀😀