How CONNECTED Are You?

How CONNECTED Are You?

Not to piggy-back with today's 'IN' thing but indeed, 'CONNECTION' has evolved to be the norm especially the past two years where we all got LOCKED OUT by this pandemic.  So, how CONNECTED are you?  Regardless if you're still a student, a worker, an entrepreneur or someone in a relationship now, to be CONNECTED is now the norm.  Ooooops, to be CONNECTED is NOT even an option for us to skip.

Oh yes, for those techie SMEs, anytime they hear CONNECTED, likely they will think of IOT [Internet of Things] but no sirrrrs, today's piece is NOT about IOT.  Instead, this is all about how are we really CONNECTED [are we?] in life but instead, we'd like to dissect as what are the consequences of being DISCONNECTED. If you're still in school, expect to struggle in your academic performance.

At the workplace, if you are DISCONNECTED,  not sure with your awareness and alignment with your organization's goals, mission and vision.  And in terms of delivery to clients, not sure if you are aligned with the quality aspects your clients demand and expect.  And if you're in a relationship, being DISCONNECTED does not augur well for your relationship because that will likely lead to gaps that may widen.

At the end of the day, what binds us in our endeavors are our being CONNECTED consistently.  Keyword here is CONSISTENCY because if we end up like a 'flash in the pan',  we are being deceptive to ourselves because sporadic flashes lend credence to doubts of your credibility in being CONNECTED.  BTW, lip service is equally self-defeating.  You can't cheat on yourself because in the end, you are pushing yourself deeper in that morass.

Ask me, what could be a game-changer or even a life-changer?  It is either being CONNECTED or DISCONNECTED because that separates the grain from the chaff.  So, there is no unwritten formula here.  Be genuine to your partners in school, at work, in your business or at the workplace and never waiver and weaken your resolve to be on the same page❗❗❗

Be QUICK to Listen, SLOW to Speak

Be QUICK to Listen, SLOW to Speak

Question:  Have you ever been advised to Be QUICK to Listen, SLOW to Speak ?  I guess, hardly and likely, nary at all.  I DON'T evem remember myself being advised on this at all.  Why?  Probably, it's because many of us are guilty of this [and I'd be the first one to admit that many times in the past, I was guilty of this too].  But then, it's never late for us to RIGHT THE WRONGS.

To take a leaf from james 1:19, Be QUICK to Listen, SLOW to Speak [AND... SLOW TO get angry]. And this truism can't be more valid.  Because, the truth of the matter is that more often than not, we have that propensity to SHOOT FROM THE HIP.  We even tend to speak way ahead of our vocals because instantaneously, we tend to pre-judge or prematurely reach to conclusion bereft of the validated facts and data that need to be pieced together to come up with the complete picture that is neither skewed nor distorted.  Let's look back into our lives and recall those repeated exceptions where we are that guilty akin to having blood in our hands.

At work, have we pre-judged some of our colleagues?  In our relationship with ur partner/spouse, HOW OFTEN were you QUICK to SPEAK yet SLOW to LISTEN? And guess what happened when we pre-judged our colleagues or even our partner/spouse?  And guess what happened next?  Did you SPEAK LOUDLY so cocksure of your raw and premature conclusions?

The mother of all ironies is that often times, communications is ongoing between two parties but what results next is still a gap, a disconnect.  Why?  More often, it is due to the fact that we are NOT actively listening.  We refuse to hear things we DON'T want to hear.  FILTERING intrudes as part of the variables in the equation.  End result?  Both the protagonists will declare "I DON'T UNDERSTAND YOU" and the gap that was originally a mile apart exacerbates to become a ten-mile disconnect, no thanks to one or two parties who either wholly or partially shut down his/her eardrums as part of FILTERING.

When things get overblown beyond proportions, what's next?  It becomes a full-blown conflict when it all started off simply as a misunderstanding. If only we are QUICK to Listen and SLOW to Speak, a hell lot of conflicts all around us could have been averted in the first place.  In the end, this becomes an unnecessary problem, a problem of our own making.  If only we are QUICK to Listen, SLOW to Speak ✅✅✅

A Season Least Expected

A Season Least Expected

All year-round, we have lots of cyclical seasons.  There's summer, winter and even Christmas Season.  But who in the world ever thought that this highly digitized world will lead us to this banner page from my banker [Citi] that Any season can be a 'PHISING SEASON'.  Indeed, it's been a rowdy, rough and tumble world we live now.

Indeed, this 'PHISHING SEASON' is the mother of all seasons.  And to give credit where it is due, year-on-year, fraudsters are always [at the very least] a step ahead of any of the crack security specialists we have in the western world.  Not even the techie SMEs from Silicon Valley can match toe-to-toe with these fraudsters.  Talk about innovation, my hats off to these fraudsters [unfortunately].  Now, lifting this pic from my Citi alert wherein it tells us to ALWAYS look for that 'PADLOCK ICON' before ever ever clicking a new URL link.

And pasting again this Citi Alert, the "DO NOT" alerts are redundantly repeated, no thanks to our stubbornness to heed to alarming alerts.  BTW, why do we have stubborn folks who end up being preyed by fraudsters?

Yesirrrrreeee, we heard this a zillion times, that CURIOSITY KILLED THE CAT.  Unfortunately, some of us seemed to have become cat-cloned because no amount of ALERTS & WARNINGS have ever dissuaded us and tempered our MISPLACED CURIOSITY.  When an unknown mail sender sends a mail with a link that's enticing us to be rewarded with generous gifts and freebies, we just can't wait to click it right away.  When we receive an SMS alert that puts us in 'ALARM' mode, we react as if we're HELPLESS.

Final words to share.  If your digital or online account does NOT have the 'LOCK' option, go and find a financial services provider offering that 'LOCK' option.  Take it from me.  When I got hit with an attempted fraud [with a 'huge' purchase from Walmart, AZ], I decided that it was time to leverage on that 'LOCK' option because that's the only proactive measure to secure your digital accounts at your unguarded moments [which could be 99% of the time]❗❗❗

Any Warts in Your Game?

Any Warts in Your Game?

No sirrrrrrs, this piece is NOT about physical health and wellness. Not my turf.  Instead, this is all about us taking stock of things, being our own worst and toughest critic who won't mince words to call spade a spade.  Any Warts in Your Game?  I won't buy it if someone retorts that he's got no warts in his game because that is no less than baloney.  Not even the success stories of Bill Gates and Elon Musk gives them that mantle of invincibility.

Let's ask any Tom, Dick and Harry.  In unison, they will loudly proclaim that there is NO need to ask them for their CHINKS in their ARMOR because they know it and are aware of it, period.  But try pressing them to dissect more and they would push you backward and reinforce their OMERTA, that traditional oath to keep their lips sealed.  Too bad, this is part of our human nature.  Generally, we refused to acknowledge and accept the WARTS in our GAME.

When in truth and in fact, those WARTS in our GAME should NOT be dreaded or avoided at all.  For all we know, those are not chronic chinks but rather it could be skills that need to be honed and sharpened.  And what will it take for us to perfect such skills, this is the most open secret everyone is aware of.  It all boils down to LEARNING and PERFECTING it over and over again.

Frankly, the myth that we do NOT have WARTS in your GAME or CHINKS in our ARMOR [as the Roman gladiators boasted] can be traced back during the long reigns and rule of the revered Roman Empire.  From the emperor down to the last gladiator standing, they swore head over heels that they were all the near-perfect warriors who would survive each battle unscathed.

Bottom line, much as our life is imperfect, we need to constantly endeavor to smoothen the corners and sharpen the edges even those tweaks will hardly move the needle.  As long as you acknowledge your WARTS in your GAME, that is consoling enough if you will append to it a remediation plan how to correct your wrongs and improve on your strengths✅✅✅

Where's the Inflection Point

Where's the Inflection Point

Here we go again.  Everyone agrees that life is never flat, not even like Planet Earth [as some wrongly hypothesized]. On the other hand, while everyone of us know fully well that indeed life is no less than a rough-and-tumble world, what befuddles us is that many of us are not lifting any finger at all on the premise that this is all part of life and there is nothing we can do.  But hey, I'll push hard on you to be incisive to figure out as to Where's the Inflection Point.

The huge challenge is that point when we hit the crossroads and our upcoming judgment call and decision could be a game-changer and even life-changing.  And here's our common pitfall. When we make decisions at an Inflection Point, such decision must be thoroughly assessed, including doing a thorough assessment of the risks because whether you go east-ward or west-ward, likely there is NO perfect option.  It all boils down on your judgment call.

The trickiest part is that at that Inflection Point, there is NO helpline, not even your close coterie, not even your cordon sanitaire, if you have one.  WHY?  Because when you get to that 'Y' road crossing, more often, the two options at hand are almost on the same footing , not offering you a runaway option but instead a close call.

Let's a sampling of nerve-wrenching Inflection Points.  If after you graduate from university, there's a Masteral scholarship offer from the U.S. Ivy League.  At the same time, here's a Fortune 500 dangling you a carrot, a job offer that's too good to refuse.  Your take?  It's your take.  In relationships, it's an altogether different ballgame.  On one hand, you want to pamper and spoil your partner by giving in to his/her whims.  Yet, from a practical standpoint, you would ask yourself:  Is it prudent?

There you go, folks.  We cannot look far ahead down the road beyond the Inflection Point that is staring right in our face.  Point is, whether you take the first option or the second option, DON'T feel bad.  Even assuming you end up picking the wrong option, it WON'T be cataclysmic but assuming your call was NOT the best but next time around, your better judgment is what you need to take you to the next level❗❗❗

No Time? Make Time!

No Time?  Make Time!

How many times in life did we blurt out that we have NO TIME?  Probably a zillion times, right? The truth is, that is mankind's most favorite and most overused excuse in life.  Whether it is for mundane things to meeting expectations of your friends to complying with workplace requirements to standing up to your responsibilities as a partner/spouse or worst, if your health seems to be failing, we are all guilty [OVER and OVER AGAIN] for finding a way out by claiming you have No Time?  

But the mother of all questions is this:  Is having NO TIME a valid and credible reason?  Having NO TIME becomes valid if emergencies and/or sudden turn of events happen in our life.  When your bosom friend suddenly flies back to the country and at that time you were on a business trip, it is a no brainer that that reason is valid.  

But if every now and then, you are chasing time as if it is ticking just too fast or you seem to be at the tail-end of things, unable to 'DELIVER the DELIVERABLE', how can you buttress the fact that more often, having NO TIME is more of a ruse, an excuse, an alibi no less.  But you might get back to me scream, BUT THAT IS NOT A CRIME!  Of course it is not but when you condone your recurring NO TIME excuse, does it hold water?

Over this most recent weekend, myself and my wife were in a dilemma because we wanted to be in two places on the same day but the catch is that those two places are 101 miles apart [and that's not even a straight line to traverse].  Lo and behold, we managed to FIND TIME, TAKE the TIME and MAKE the TIME.  How?  We had to tweak things a bit without spoiling my family's holiday schedule and at the same, keeping up to our promise to travel [whatever it takes] to be with our daughter's favorite teacher.

When we finally reached home Sunday evening, it was a miracle of sorts because 'INSPITE of WAZE' [yes that's true, the WAZE app was more of a challenge as it was pointing me to traverse across directions that would have thrown a monkey wrench to be at the place at the appointed time].  And I'd admit it was no mean feat because from the time our family had a 'quick' breakfast buffet then checking out from our hotel, I gave myself no more than three hours to be at the next destination [which place we were going for the very first time].  Lo and behold, we made it.  This latest feat we achieved just reinforces the fact that having NO TIME is the last excuse in life.  Hoping we can replicate this in our life over and over again, with no pressures to wilt⌛⌛⌛

Tidy Up OR The Mess Will Get Messier

Tidy Up OR The Mess Will Get Messier

Life is all a matter of choices and at any given time, we could end up with situations either in a mess or at the very least, not so tidy enough.  And that's fine as long as we have our buy-in that the next decision point is to Tidy Up OR The Mess Will Get Messier.  But a devil's advocate can argue, WHY NOT LET THE MESS DIE A NATURAL DEATH.  Good grief.  Too bad though, any mess in life never dies a natural death but instead, the ugly head of the snake might even spring out of it and before you know it, you have a situation that is not only unmanageable but worse, one that may be unresolvable.

Do an apples-to-apples comparison.  Isn't there a huge difference between a BEFORE and the AFTER if ever a mess did gets put back in order?  And take a contrarian view.  WHAT IF you didn't lift a finger?  Do you think the status quo would remain AS IS?  Oh, DON'T buy that fallacy at all.

So, what's really the QUICK FIX?  Dude, this is all a D-I-Y thing.  Clean up your own mess but how?  First off, atone to it, accept it, own it. From there, plot your action plan how to attack that mess.  And if we're referring to a messy relationship, that's a steep mountain to climb up and overcome.  Bottom line, is NEVER turn around and look the other way because you're DIGGING YOUR OWN GRAVE for that.  You got to pull the bull by its horn no less.

BTW, if children can clean-up their own mess, why can't we? Frankly though, taking the first step is the hardest part because you got to halt that momentum of your skid and turn it around in one hundred eighty degrees.  And that is huge turnaround!  So how?  Simplify a complex and tricky situation.  First things first.  Go for the low-hanging fruits.  Don't cherry pick though.  Take as you pick.  Take that need to fix a relationship, that could be akin to a TUG of WAR because likely, two protagonists will hold their ground and wpn't cede an inch, whatever happens.

And when protagonists reach an impasse, there will be NO QUARTERS given or taken.  Each one will dig up their heels in their respective trenches.  Oh, sorry about that.  That reminds me when I witnessed relationships eventually floundered because neither party would want to cede or give up an inch.  Why?  More often, the ugly head of PRIDE creeps in and everything just crumbles down.  So, let's put back SANITY in the rightful place and let us be fair and just if we have that good faith and resolve to really TIDY UP THINGS or the MESS GETS MESSIER❗❗❗

Seize the Moment [Carpe Diem]

Seize the Moment [Carpe Diem]

Throughout our lives, we all go through zillions of moments, peaks and valleys, troughs and and trenches but what most of us tend to miss is that opportunity to Seize the Moment a.k.a. Carpe Diem.  This may be quite convoluted because there are moments in our life which we'd rather forget and obliterate from our memories and that's understandable.  But how about all other moments which we could have Seized the Moment and end up on the uptick.

BTW, to Seize the Moment does NOT mean waiting for an opportunity and seize it.  More often, opportunities are NOT served on a silver platter.  More often, an opportunity is just showing a slight glimmer of light which could be a hundred miles down the road and it is for you to be incisive and so focused to go for it.

Picture yourself standing at the coast and with your naked eyes, you can see opportunities lurking out there in the waters.  Even assuming you want to go for it, you got two scenarios which is, either you standstill on the coast and wait for that opportunity [it could be a prized blue marlin] or you would just row your boat and zero-in within a perimeter area to Seize the Moment of angling that 'catch'.

As this poster says it, TIME WAITS FOR NO ONE.  That's spot on simply because many of us tend to miss out the fact that we all live on BORROWED TIME.  We are NOT facing a BUFFET table of a dozen dishes for our picking in a leisurely pace.  So how do you extricate from that dilemma?  RACE AGAINST YOURSELF.  Set a benchmark and once you breach it, MOVE THE GOAL POST and keep RAISING THE BAR.  Then, you're now seizing the moment✅✅✅

Know the PRICE POINT

Know the PRICE POINT

Oh, today's piece is not a commercial doc.  You could be a student now or simply a partner of your spouse.  Nevertheless, you cannot be bailed out from Knowing your PRICE POINT because each of us does command a PRICE but the bigger question where all the interested parties will be likely begging to hear and know is that what is your PRICE POINT.  Unfortunately, everything has a PRICE POINT.

And the variable that is always pegged to one's PRICE POINT is your very own VALUE as a product.  So, where's the beef?  For you to have a good and reasonable PRICE POINT, your VALUE will need to be figured out.  And how will you be assessed?  Like it or not, you will BENCHMARKED with today's market.  How good are you in your craft, how efficient are you, how good is your quality, among others.

So, how do you fare now in the market?  Are you a blue chip the major employers will dangle a juicy job offer?  Or are you simply a part of the mainstream, that huge segment of 'MEDIANs' who can't be tagged either as LEADERS or LAGGARDS? If you are bunched in that pack, the upside is that you are NOT hugging the cellar.  But is that the spot you deserve to be, right now?

BTW, if there's one thing we CAN'T get away from?  It is the QUALITY aspect.  Whether we'll talk about relationships, about school life or work life or even an entrepreneur's world, QUALITY is the common denominator.  What's your QUALITY score as a partner/spouse?  As a worker?  As an entrepreneur? BTW, we can't understate that QUALITY score because that could be a GAME-CHANGER or worst, a DEAL-BREAKER.  If your QUALITY score is spotty at best, expect your price to be badly battered.

Yes folks, everything boils down to $$$$$ and cents.  And frankly, in life, you are only as good as your VALUE today as in RIGHT NOW.  if your value suffers a dip or it continues to go down south, the urgency to arrest that skid cannot be over-emphasized.  You would rather pour it out to rescue yourself now than much later when you plummet at a value that will be beyond recovery.  How many lives have we witnessed to have plummeted deep enough?  How to avert this?  Know thy PRICE POINT❗❗❗

Are You Cooked and Burned?

Are You Cooked and Burned?

Nope, today's thread is NOT about culinary arts.  But instead, we'd like to peek into our lives and ask ourselves if we are Cooked and Burned as we speak now?  Frankly in life, we do NOT expect to be that Cooked and Burned so soon in life because even our normal trajectories normally shapes up in a gradual, managed approach.  But if you got Cooked and Burned so soon in life, we got to figure out why this early, you really got Cooked and Burned because that's alarming  

So, what does being Cooked and Burned really mean?  Frankly, if you're in a workplace, that could imply that you're feeling BURNT OUT.  It's like your energy is spent, your drive is drained.  That's when you feel zapped.  But the bigger question stomping right in our face is as to what and why it took that fast for you get drained, spent and zapped?  Is/Was it your lifestyle?  Your discipline in life? Or how purposeful your life was?

If there's a word we need to attack now, it is 'BURNOUT' because whether you're still in the academe or now in the workplace, you might get caught with 'BURNOUT'  much sooner.  Why?  Could it be discontentment either with your academic nentors in school?  Or your bosses at the workplace?  Or it could be a rough-and-tumble relationship that has been rocking wildly till you got thrown off?

Either way, you got to arrest that 'DOWNHILL' trend in your life.  You just CAN'T leave it at that because we all know what and where will you end up.  If you're embroiled in a relationship that has been draining and taxing you 24x7, figure things out because you might have reached the tail-end of that saga.

At the very least, cry and scream for HELP.  Fine for you NOT to look for HELP if you DON'T need it.  But if there you are, limping down the rough roads, throw away that pride, dump away your ego and just go to your HELPLINE because for you to end up this early as Cooked and Burned is akin to the curtain call where you have reached your non-extendible DEAD END, whew✅✅✅