Our Roads Are ALWAYS 'Passable'

 

For many zillion times, I'd hear someone blurt like, I'M DONE, IT'S YOUR TURN or like, 'BEEN THERE, DONE THAT' or like 'I HAVE ENOUGH'.  Oh, really?  Should we stop our SELF-IMPROVEMENT initiatives for any of those reasons?  Probably, only someone WHO's seriously ill enough can say all these.  Otherwise, NOTHING and NOTHING should dissuade us from our SELF-IMPROVEMENT initiatives because yes,  Our Roads Are ALWAYS 'Passable', no road blockers along the way📗📙📘

Low confidence.  Self-doubt.  Seemingly unmotivated.  If so, MAYBE we are undervaluing our worth and limiting our success.  If this sounds familiar, there is NO better time for PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT [often a.k.a. SELF-IMPROVEMENT] than NOW.  Challenge here is that the coinage 'PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT sounds so mundane, it will hardly illicit even the tiniest reaction from most of us.  It's like a motherhood statement BUT in the simplest words, SELF-IMPROVEMENT is that act of improving oneself💚💛💜

Personally, SELF-IMPROVEMENT is a lifelong journey I have committed myself, all the way from my high school and university days although admittedly, during those early years, I was ALWAYS [as in ALWAYS] nervous to try new things.  Sometimes, even like I felt I needed to be someone WHO had to do everything right and please everyone.  I felt at times I COULDN'T be my true self❎❎❎

WHEN I reached college, I can wholeheartedly say that that was WHEN I became steadfast in my SELF-IMPROVEMENT process.  I tried new things, took new risks, and I'll humbly admit that I became a better version of myself [although I never ceased to remind myself that even my better version [at that time] was far way off from WHAT I want to be.  The thing is, I fully embraced that process from thereon😊😊😊

Our takeaway:  SELF-IMPROVEMENT is something that takes time.  I've witnessed [first hand] multiple 'spoilers' WHEREIN a person is like a 'perfectionist' to the extent that even WHEN he has progressed by inch, WHILE he does recognize that, he does it NEGATIVELY by telling himself 'NAH, THIS ISN'T ENOUGH, NOT I WANNA BE' but that's precisely the point here, SELF-IMPROVEMENT WASN'T concocted straight from that Big Bang Theory.  Let us NEVER loose sight of the fact that everything in our life is a work-in-progress [WIP] and yes, although many times, there are potholes and roadblocks, OUR ROADS ARE ALWAYS 'PASSABLE'.  Bring it on, dude❗❗❗

Are You One Of The EXHAUSTED Majority?

Are You One Of The EXHAUSTED Majority?

NOT being a health or medical SME, I prefer to buy their most common reason that many of us get seemingly exhausted in our daily lives either because of insufficient SLEEP or undue STRESS.  I'd like to take the best of both worlds and argue that if you have issues both with SLEEP and STRESS, that is the very best recipe ever for your EXHAUSTION to become a serious and chronic issue.  So, Are You One Of The EXHAUSTED Majority?  BUT the truth is, we all go through periods of low energy.  Even a week of feeling more tired than usual is NOT that uncommon to manifest.  Yet, most people can tell WHEN their fatigue feels like something more serious.  And IF that's the case OR your fatigue gets worse OR lasts longer than a week OR two, you've hit that wall of 'NO RETURN' WHERE the most responsible next move is for you to seek medical consultation📌📌📌

And if you're feeling overly tired OR feeling your reservoir of energy [and battery life] getting drained, you're NOT alone.  One too many of us, a plurality at the very least OR demographically, it can even be a majority.  If you have an underlying condition, then you should be the first one to figure it out if you need to dig deeper.  And quite often, medical experts tell us the least of worries will come up next if your issue seems NOT getting sufficient OR quality sleep because more often, that gets easier rectified😖😖😖

Things get murkier if you are probably having deficiencies of the basic nutrients.  Iron, Niacin, Riboflavin, Folate, Vitamins B12, C, D, name it all because that's the farthest I can go.  BUT the thing is, if you're experiencing that probable troubling fatigue, DON'T waste time to seek a medical consultation.  As they say, fatigue that's related to a deficiency in any of the nutrients could normalize once nutrient levels improve💥💥💥

NOW, here's the biggest bomb yet to be dropped.  STRESS is now the unquestioned #1 'KILLER' regardless of demographics OR location.  And while they say that some STRESS is normal, WHAT will guarantee us that so-called normal STRESS we're going through will not worsen to become a chronic STRESS?  And medical experts declare that in fact, chronic stress may even lead to stress-related exhaustion disorder💦💦💦

Our takeaway:  A proven life hack [under normal circumstances] is to eat often to beat tiredness.  And a good way to keep your energy through every 3 to 4 hours a day rather than having a large portion.  Most importantly, exhaustion does NOT mean the 'end of the world' but it could lead you to a new lease of life as long as you NIP IN THE BUD a brewing problem that may just worsen and way beyond for you to handle.  So, ARE YOU ONE OF THE EXHAUSTED ONES???

One Step At A Time, PLEASE?

One Step At A Time, PLEASE?

Very true, if we had our way, everything needs to move at the speed of light.  Oh Oh Oh, that wisdom of taking life ONE STEP AT A TIME often gets overlooked.  In the rush to achieve our goals and keep up with the frenetic pace of life, we might even find ourselves burning out and losing sight of WHAT truly matters.  After all, we have been trained to cherish being busy.  BUT as the song lyrics go, can we take One Step At A Time?  Quite confusing but recent studies show that slowing down and taking time for oneself facilitates a more fruitful experience of life📗📙📘

So, are we slowing down to speed up?  To emphasize the importance of embracing the journey and learning from every step and finding inspiration in the unexpected.  Looking back, however, WHILE sometimes we might feel the need to speed up and do everything at once due to that FEAR OF MISSING OUT and pressure from other people, we actually must cherish rest time and periods of being still.  To quote psychologists, for in those moments, 'MAGIC IS BORN'.  I remember this story retold a zillion times over and over again, that rare encounter between Chuck Norris and Bruce Lee, two legendary martial arts icons, with Norris telling Bruce Lee that he was moving too fast, that his whole timing is OFF and that he needs to slow down.  Apparently, that interaction did hold a profound meaning beyond the realm of combat as Norris recognized that in the pursuit of greatness, sometimes it's essential to take a step back💥💥💥

WHY is it sometimes we do need to take a step back in life?  Obviously, we need to reassess things.  For so many years in our workplace, our favorite verb was to CHECKPOINT.  And till to date, that has become a household name in all our calls.  And it's even 'music to the ears' of our clients.  WHY?  Simply put, by CHECKPOINTING, we do reassessments of that journey to date, WHERE we stand now, HOW things stand now and WHAT's in store for us over there in the horizons.  In short, life can't be akin to the F1 Race where the rule of the game is to speed up at break-neck pace.  Life is altogether different.  People that pressure others to speed up simply have something inherently wrong with them💧💧💧

In the wild goose chase in our daily life, we would hear INNER PEACE, CALM and a QUITE MIND as topping the high priorities of WHAT we want in life.  However, ever since I entered the workforce, I have always constantly observed that most things move at the pace of the particular industry you are in, NOT in the pace of one person.  And being raw straight out of university during those years, I was telling myself that I got only one option and that option was for me to adjust and to align to the realities❗❗❗

Our takeaway:  This is neither a choice nor an option.   By slowing down, we will allow ourselves the opportunity to reflect, learn, and adjust our course WHEN necessary.  This deliberate approach NOT only prevents burnout BUT also ensures that each step we will take is purposeful enough and more importantly, meaningful enough.  Taking life ONE STEP AT A TIME is about making deliberate and informed choices that contribute to our long-term success.  WHERE to, dude???

Being SOFT In A HARD World!

Being SOFT In A HARD World!

Not so long ago, we were born SOFT.  YESSSS, we were then squishy and very vulnerable [just like everyone else].  And YES, we are all deeply feeling beings.  And YES, many of us [and I was one of those in the past] just choose NOT to show it.  And admittedly, for a big chunk of my life in the past, I was a shade of that kind of person, afraid to be open afraid to be perceived as weak, much afraid to be the real me.  NOT to redirect our fingers to anyone else, the harsh truth is that from our very raw growing up years, [almost] all of us were taught to believe that SOFTNESS was a weakness, that your sensitivity will make you small.  Alas, over time, we end up hardened.  And as I self reflect, I thought the shell I formed around my heart would protect me from this messy world BUT all it really provided   me was a FALSE sense of safety and comfort that painfully prevented my growth.  Being SOFT In A HARD World!!!

YES, can we agree that it is an illusion to believe that hardening our hearts and hiding our softness from this messy world is productive enough?  WHEN we fear being vulnerable and we hide WHO we are, we only create more division.  Because deep down, let's admit, we are all SOFT.  We're all squishy.  We're all vulnerable.  And YET, we all desire to be seen.  BUT here's the mother of all ironies.  HOW can we be seen IF we aren't allowing ourselves to be seen?  NOW, to complicate the murky waters we're now threading, another hard truth is that it's already hard to be soft WHEN life itself is hard, right?  BUT our ability to stay soft in the hardness is WHAT makes us strong📘📙📗

Ironically, it is indeed scary to allow the pain to wash through us because WHEN we allow the pain to be felt, that's WHEN we break, that's WHEN the shell that's wrapped around us begin to thin until it gradually cracks out in the open.  So fine.  Someone will tell us, let it crack.  Let is break open and fall onto the ground into a million bits of pieces because WHEN we do, that's WHEN we become soft.  And here's the thing.  WHEN have we ever seen something that is soft so easy to break???

We've seen hundreds and maybe thousands of children WHO are, undoubtedly, soft BUT how often have we seen a majority of them easily breaking?  Now, let's call a spade a spade.  We were all born soft, that's just our natural way of being.  BUT staying soft in a hard world has now become a superpower.  Our softness makes us magnetic.  Our softness makes us human.  Our softness makes us seen.  And ISN'T it that's we all wanted all along, that is, to be seen???

Our takeaway:  This is WHEN I'd like to heed the advice of psychologists WHO declared that WHEN life gets hard and things go wrong, the most counterintuitive and seemingly impossible choice is to relax, to soften, and find ease with WHAT's happening.  HOW can we [and BTW, WHY should we, anyway] relax WHEN life feels seemingly out of control and NOT in a good way at that?  WHEN difficulty spikes, we end up fighting with it, brace against it.  Our resistance is our way of saying that we're NOT okay with reality, and instead, insisting that we can change it.  BUT unfortunately it DOESN'T work and it DOESN'T help.  Think about BEING SOFT IN A HARD WORLD!!!

Of Winners And Whiners

Of Winners And Whiners

Other than their closely similar sounds, WHAT differentiates the Winners And Whiners?  NOT to overwhelm you, dude, BUT the fact is, there is a mega ultra huge disconnect between WINNERS and WHINERS, too wide enough to be comparable to Pacific Ocean, it being the biggest ocean in the world.  BUT back to Winners And Whiners.  This is WHEN in the NBA world, men are separated from the boys and even men with less grit are ejected from a team of 'DAWGs'.  That explains why the vaunted 'MIAMI CULTURE' is both admired and hated in the NBA.  Admired because it has proven its grit since it joined the NBA. WHEREAS, it is hated by those who fail to keep up with the exacting and rigid expectations of the Miami Heat ballclub.  Going around the NBA landscape, most basketball gurus are in unison that only a select few are cut for that MIAMI HEAT CULTURE!!!

So, here's a frank question for you.  Are you a WHINER or a WINNER?  More than just a play of words here, that difference can mean either success OR stagnation [apologies for that quite frightening adjective].  So, here's another frank question.  WHY is it some people seem to be that constantly turbo-boosted ahead WHILE others are stagnant and remain in the same chair doing the same job for donkey years?  Can we draw a correlation here between the chronic complainers versus the perpetual doers?  YES, in the pursuit of success, it is essential to distinguish between behaviors that propel some people forward WHILE holding back some of us.  At this point, rather than we reinvent the wheel, let us pick on the brains of the experts in their fields and they are one in saying that the way to go is for us to differentiate the WINNERS versus the WHINERS📗📙📘

• WHINERS are into negativity, WHINERS remain positive.
• WHINERS focus on problems, WINNERS seek solutions.
• WHINERS blame others, WINNERS take the responsibility.
• WHINERS procrastinate, WINNERS take concrete actions.
• WHINERS seek validation WINNERS maintain confidence
• WHINERS resist change, WINNERS embrace innovations
• WHINERS get impacted by setbacks, WINNERS motivated
• WHINERS complain its not in in their control, WINNERS focus on WHAT they can influence the end-results.
• WHINERS give up when they 'hit the wall', WINNERS remain resilient and go on despite the rough patches along the road

In a nutshell, once we self-reflect, WHETHER deep inside we would realize that we are 'closet' WHINERS or perennial WINNERS, the distinction between them lies in attitudes, actions, and our responses to challenges we face in life.  By cultivating the traits of a WINNER, such as resilience, responsibility, and proactive problem-solving, YES let's celebrate because there is NO monopoly for the ability to unlock that potential💥💥💥

Our takeaway:   Despite all these delineations that are as clear as water, WHAT makes me sadder is that, through the years, I did interact with WHINERS but the sadder part is that they WON'T even admit and acknowledge that they are WHINERS.  And that's the biggest gaping hole you can get trapped, WHEN you yourself WON'T admit and acknowledge it.  For many Christians, before you go to the confessional to confess and seek forgiveness, there has to be an ACT OF CONTRITION, as otherwise, you cannot take the next step of rectifying and RIGHTING THE WRONGs dude😃😃😃

Relationships Top The Charts!

Relationships Top The Charts!

One huge disconnect through centuries is that we are into relationships because it's something we want to, whether it's a romantic. familial or traditional relationship, relationships we form with people are vital to our mental and emotional well-being and even our survival.  True, we humans have an inherent desire to be close to other people.  YES, Relationships Top The Charts!!!

Let's hear it from the experts who claim that social support is a very important part of being a human, and therefore, WHEN social relationships break down OR are damaged, it can have a big impact on our mental health and well-being.  And they add that it SHOULDN'T come down to just one relationship.  One psychologist declared that "IT'S IMPORTANT TO NOT FOCUS ON TRYING TO GET EVERYTHING YOU NEED FROM ONE RELATIONSHIP"📗📙📘

Instead, we are encouraged to focus on having a network of social support with a variety of different types of relationships to hold up our well-being and even quality of life.  And I agree that a positive relationship can be shared between any two people WHO support, encourage, and help each other physically as well as emotionally.  And here's WHEN thing can get tricky because 'healthy communications' can have a thousand versions.  Instead:

• Understand WHERE the other person is coming from.
• Be willing to hear someone even if you think it's untrue.
• Listen WITHOUT preparing your rebuttal OR response

Collating how I witnessed from my 'observation deck', let us consider the following proven good practices:

• LISTEN to each other WITHOUT pre-judgments
• REMEMBER relevant details about each other
• MAKE TIME for each other.  It's a MUST-DO
• Work COLLABORATIVELY [not individually]
• FOCUS on a mutually beneficial relationship 
• TRUST and RESPECT each other, period
• ENGAGE in healthy activities TOGETHER

Our takeaway here:  Pooling all our needs, wants and likes, NOTHING beats RELATIONSHIPS but if there is one thing often missed out is that, unlike the airborne flights, after building up and reinforcing the foundations of a RELATIONSHIP, you CAN'T leave it at that, to fly on auto-pilot mode because all these RELATIONSHIPS will remain in a work-in-progress mode [even at the peak of its strength]. Once you loose your guard, the very robust foundations can gradually waiver and weaken till it crumbles.  Yes dude, RELATIONSHIPS TOP THE CHARTS!!!

When Finding Peace Really Comes

When Finding Peace Really Comes

Very true, everyone of us would dream of FINDING PEACE.  No amount of SUCCESS [OR whatever trillions of wealth] can supplant OR replace genuine INNER PEACE.  Let's ask billionaires Jeff Bezos OR Bill Gates [whose net worth are $200 billion & $138 billion respectively].  We sincerely wish they have found their INNER PEACE even after their 'expensive' divorces from their 'EXes'.  That's When Finding Peace Really Comes becomes our talking point today📗📙📘

A bit nostalgic with this pic I grabbed because it looks similar to DARUANAK, a very small islet near my hometown.  Back to our talking point today though.  Studies tell us that mental strength and INNER PEACE go hand in hand.  Their research subjects showed that mentally strong people are confident that they can handle WHATEVER life throws their way.  That's NOT to say they DON'T feel pain OR that they DON'T get sad.  On the contrary, studies showed that their emotions do run on a DEEP LEVEL💦💦💦

So WHERE's the gap then? Experts tell us that for mentally strong people, they stay focused on managing their own thoughts, feeling and behaviors.  Years back WHEN I had to face one storm after a storm, I constantly reminded myself to keep the MAIN THING THE MAIN THING.  In brief, I had to be rock-focused on WHAT is the issue at hand.  WHERE I faced two storms in one go, CHOOSE YOUR BATTLES [because it is highly unlikely you can weather two storms in one go]!!!

To quote Oprah Winfrey, INNER PEACE is possible and BTW, she remind us that you DON'T need to meditate on a mountaintop OR break the bank for a wellness retreat in order to find it.  Carving out time to relax is wonderful BUT it's amid the frantic pace of everyday life WHEN we need serenity the most.  Let's take a realistic daily life scenario.  You're in a long queue in the pharmacy and the contents of your bag spill on the floor as your mobile phone rings with a frantic call from someone asking for HELP!@#$%?

Our takeaway:  Let's dice and drill things here.  First off, look around WITHIN YOU.  The people you surround yourself will affect the way you think, feel and behave.  NOT to scare you BUT engaging people who lie, gossip, bully OR cheat will take its toll on your well-being. Mentally strong people DON'T waste their energy trying to change toxic people.  Ooops, STOP excessive self-blame and START chasing happiness and continue to pursue for imperfection [even if we're imperfect].  THAT'S WHEN FINDING PEACE REALLY COMES😃😃😃

When Obsession Creeps...

When Obsession Creeps...

Per se, OBSESSIONS are recurrent ideas, thoughts, impulses OR images that are experienced as being intrusive and senseless BUT are recognized as the person's own thoughts.  Fortunately, I DON'T recall falling into that 'mouse trap' even in the past BUT in sharings by those WHO went through the gauntlet, they tell us that the experience itself is distressing and attempts to resist its content OR form are NOT successful.  To make matters worse, those compulsions include actions OR cognitions which include even counting OR praying even as they are referred more as rituals.  When Obsession Creeps, that's WHEN we got to take a stand📘📙📗

Before we get mixed up, people with and without obsessive compulsive disorder [OCD] can experience OBSESSIONS.  It's just that those with OCD tend to experience more distress, guilt, negative emotion, and interference in daily life compared to most of us.  WHAT's quite perplexing is what studies show that most people know their OBSESSIONS are excessive BUT feel unable to control them.  And because they are unwanted and disturbing, OBSESSIONS usually cause anxiety.  As many of us could have gone through the symptoms of OBSESSION, it may help to 'drill and dice' it💧💧💧

Hearing from the experts, OBSESSIONS typically fall along certain anxiety-inducing themes, such as fears of harm, sickness and, knock on wood, bad luck as well as things that are inappropriate OR wrong.  Oh oh, I remember one OBSESSION I had [probably till now] and that's perfectionism.  And as per studies, perfectionistic OBSESSIONS are overwhelmed by a fear of making mistakes, doing something wrong, OR leaving things out of place😌😌😌

Surprisingly, perfectionist OCD may involve:

• Order, symmetry and organization
• Neatness [ouch, I'm guilty of it]
• Following rules/routines [been there]
• Completing tasks perfectly [as always]

BUT contrary to popular belief, perfectionistic OBSESSIONS AREN'T always about organization, neatness because it could mean rigidly adhering to strict religious, ethical and/or moral beliefs💥💥💥

Our takeaway:  WHAT this all tells us is that consciously OR not, we all do manifest various behaviors of OBSESSION but WHAT matters most is that we need to ensure that those OBSESSIVE manifestations do not push us to the extremes to the extent that we get buried under the weight of all the unnecessary OR unwanted OBSESSIONS.  Let us be on the lookout WHEN OBSESSION creeps❗❗❗

Do We Have An ATTENTION DEFICIT Problem?

Do We Have An ATTENTION DEFICIT Problem?

It is NOT uncommon for us to see people working and grinding hard [yes, that includes even the ultra wealthy  business moguls and even Fortune 500 CEOs to juggle two OR three mobile phones even WHEN in a meeting.  YES, ATTENTION DEFICIT is a legitimate problem and researches show that it is now the silent killer that is the very root cause of a lot of misdecisions OR wrong decisions we make.  So, the question is:  Do We Have An ATTENTION DEFICIT Problem???

BUT before we get mixed with ATTENTION DEFICIT, no sirrrrrs, we WON'T discuss either ADD [attention deficit disorder] or ADHD but we'd like to tackle WHAT our brains are doing WHEN we multitask, switching rapidly between tasks.  Neuroscientists claim that such constant switches taxes our brain one too many as it essentially tires it out and makes it less efficient.  Effectively, this affects our ability to focus our attention in general, even WHEN we are NOT multitasking😌😌😌

For alignment, multitasking essentially means that you are trying to perform two OR more tasks at the same time.  Many people mistakenly believe that multitasking reflects a high level of cognitive ability and think that you should multitask to maintain your brain health.  BUT here's a big BUT from experts.  Our brains are NOT and were NOT set up for multitasking at all.  Instead, our brain was designed to be a 'monotasker', that is, to focus on and complete one task at a time❗❗❗

The wide misconception prevailing for so long now is that our brain can multitask.  YES and NO.  It can because it CAN'T say NO.  BUT as neuroscientists claim, those constant brain switching essentially tires out our brain and in the end, it makes us less efficient.  I remember my first  stint in Singapore, I was about to be introduced for the first time to our client whose project I'll be managing.  I requested for a project briefing from the consulting director and I was advised I'll be briefed once we are on the road to the client's site.  Whoa, when finally we were on the road, the consulting director was rushing on a document in her laptop while verbally briefing me at a 'shinkanzen speed'.  I pulled the brakes and said, can we pause and focus before multitasking???

Our takeaway: multitasking has more short-term  effects than we thought.  One correlational study showed that individuals WHO are high media multitaskers have smaller brain volumes in an area of the brain known as 'cingulate cortex', which experts claim, are important for regulating emotions and behaviors.  However, it is unclear if multitasking causes permanent brain changes if people with smaller volumes in this brain region are more likely to be drawn to multitasking.  So, DO WE HAVE AN ATTENTION DEFICIT problem???

Remaining Calm When Triggered

Remaining Calm When Triggered

Staying CALM during challenging [and sometimes turbulent] times is easier said than done.  Whether you live in Europe, Americas, Middle East OR Asia [OR jokingly, even if you live in the high seas in the middle of South China Sea], there are numerous tense situations [call it turmoil to be blunt] BUT that's the least of our concerns because what matters most is our personal life.  So, WHEN you get into heated situations, How was it, Remaining Calm When Triggered?  If I may guess, a plurality of times, we were unable to retain our consistent CALMNESS, not to our fault BTW.  So, our thread today is how can we endeavor to Remain Calm When Triggered📗📙📘

Nowadays, simply tuning in to the daily news is likely to be stressful.  Add the stresses of our daily life, you will have at hand a hodge-podge of variables that can trigger you away from your CALMNESS anytime [especially at your most unguarded moments].  Coping with family issues like illness, caregiving OR [even, especially] financials, you may likely end up begin to greet each day with apprehension and worry.  In other words, you can end up anxious💧💧💧

Psychiatrists tell us that some degree of anxiety is pretty normal [and sometimes necessary, else it may falsely lead you to think that life is a bed of roses].  BUT when anxiety creeps in, it signals us that something is awry OR might need your attention.  However, you DON'T want the response to become exaggerated OR to dominate your life.  Good coping mechanisms for stress and anxiety can help us stay grounded [and hopefully healthy] even during the worst of turbulent times in life❎❎❎

Now, this gets interesting [however, convoluted].  NOT every anxiety should be passed on as an everyday anxiety. The flip side of everyday anxiety can lead you to worse situations you would have least expected. WHEN you get obsessed about finances to the point WHEN these thoughts would then interfere with your daily life. WHEN you end up with panic attacks WHERE you break out in a sweat, shake and end up with palpitations.  WHEN you're terrified of something that DOESN'T pose a threat to you, like that colored RED, and do everything you can to avoid it.  WHEN you avoid social situations out of fear that people will laugh at OR judge you😕😕😕

Our takeaway:  We may want to begin things by considering WHETHER our anxiety is normal OR whether we have an anxiety disorder which experts define as symptoms that have plagued you for the last recent months. And if your anxiety has interfered with your daily life for a while, we are counselled to consider any of these:

• TALK ABOUT IT-Explain your situation to family and friends
• TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF-Take healthy, tasty meals
• KEEP A LIST-Write down every worry or fear that creeps 
• USE CALMING TECHNIQUES-Get into mindfulness, relaxation or even download smartphone apps that will guide you Bottomline:  Let's REMAIN CALM [even WHEN TRIGGERED]