You Need To Get Into Every RABBIT HOLE

You Need To Get Into Every RABBIT HOLE

Today, our thread is NOT about rabbits but instead, we'd like to take a leaf from a rabbit's daily life where their world revolves around the rabbit hole.  But do you know that even before we were born on this Planet Earth, there was a pre-existing human problem awaiting us.  And that problem is WANTING LIFE TO BE EASY.  Unfortunately, that is both a combined fallacy and fiction because the hard truth is, throughout our lifetime, You Need To Get Into Every RABBIT HOLE not only to survive life but to bring you closer to the goals you set for you to achieve❗❗❗

This ISN'T intended to be a post in support of drudgery or making life difficult for yourself.  In the first place, we're all for doing things in the most straightforward and simplest way, however, believing that life should be inherently easy and straightforward is sometimes a 'FAST PASS' to dissatisfaction, anger and worst, depression.  Sometimes, things will come easily to you and it's important to enjoy the parts of your life that seem to slot into place💎💎💎

Having said this, when people assume that things should come easily and believe at some level that the core aspects of life such as relationships and work should generally be plain sailing, it often leads to feeling 'cheated'.  Also, it can feel as if there's something wrong with you if you find certain parts of life challenging while other people seem to sail through, finding things difficult can somehow become a fault or even a character defect⏳⏳⏳

So, here we go.  Like it or NOT, we got to live our life like a rabbit.  As with most beliefs in adulthood, they often stem from our childhood experiences.  Having a sheltered childhood that involved a lack of of exposure to difficulty and challenge often means that WHEN we face any level of ADVERSITY in adulthood it feels unfamiliar and intolerable.  On the other hand, having a childhood of emotional or practical hardship can leave us exhausted and may create a SENSE of WANTING to make it to the FINISH LINE📌📌📌

As we go up against ROADBLOCKS in adulthood, it can be easy to slip into wondering 'AM I THERE YET' as if you're waiting to enter the HARDSHIP FREE ZONE in life.  Of course, life isn't all bad and over time with the right combination of focus as well as HARD WORK, you will then hopefully experience life as being easier than it has felt in the past.  Much as we are NOT rabbits, the harsh reality is that we got to inculcate that 'rabbithole' mindset because that's what life is all about✅✅✅

Setting Boundaries

Setting Boundaries

These days, we all hear that we live in a borderless world, a global village and with virtuality lording it all over our daily lives.  What gets overlooked is if there is a need for us to be Setting Boundaries?  Our problem is, when we hear 'BOUNDARIES', we start to imagine walls that separate us from other people.  In a sense, that is true BUT 'BOUNDARIES' aren't necessarily a bad thing💎💎💎

'BOUNDARIES' are, in fact, they are an important ingredient in healthy, balanced relationships.  They are a crucial part of maintaining your identity, mental health and physical well-being as well.  ''BOUNDARIES'' can do include restrictions on physical actions, such as asking a partner NOT to look through your mobile phone or NOT to interrupt when you're working from home.  They can also be psychological such as asking your spouse/partner to accept that your goals and dreams may NOT always be the same as theirs📌📌📌

So why do we need healthy 'BOUNDARIES'?  First, experts advise that we should reduce'codependent' habits.  Heard of BFF's who were the closest ever such that every moment they are awake, they got to go to the same mall, go to the hair stylist at the same time, shop for wardrobe at the same time, etc.  And there's NOTHING wrong with that except that will lead to extreme 'codependent' habits⏳⏳⏳

Moreover, by setting 'BOUNDARIES', we set expectations when interacting with others.  And look and face the mirror.  DON'T you deserve a SENSE OF EMPOWERMENT and SELF-RESPECT?  Further, look at your need to ensure your physical and emotional comfort and at the same time, clarifying individual responsibilities in a relationship.  Bottom line, SEPARATE your wants, needs, thoughts from those of others✅✅✅

Without healthy 'BOUNDARIES', it's probable that your relationships may become toxic and unsatisfying and in the end, your well-being may suffer.  You might even feel taken advantage of, if a friend keeps asking for $$$$ or feel overwhelmed by STRESS if you feel the need to solve all of your partner's emotional problems.  Or if a parent  continually invades your PRIVACY, you may feel resentful.  Think about the need for SETTING BOUNDARIES❗❗❗

Mental Mapping Of The Game

Mental Mapping Of The Game

Today's thread should NOT be intellectually top-heavy but we'd like to toss up Mental Mapping Of The Game because we got to embrace this in our daily life as much as it is being embraced in competitive sports.  To align, it is defined as a structured way to capture and organize ideas and information [which may seem nebulous, vague and ambiguous💊💊💊

In a not-so-simple daily life scenario, things could get pretty complex and murkier.  With 'MIND MAPS', it could lead us to a crystal clear understanding of that idea at the conceptual level till it is broken down into component parts.  That technique is used to develop new ideas or to break down and better understand the available information.  Whether we are developing new ideas OR organizing existing information, mental mapping a.k.a. MIND MAPS will help us see how information fits together.  MIND MAPS provide an expansive and flexible structure to support one's thinking.  Unlike other visual diagrams, a MIND MAPS is built around a single central topic.  All the information are then anchored to the same point by placing the main idea at the center💎💎💎

In the ongoing NBA Eastern Conference Finals between Boston Celtics and Miami Heat, no less than Boston Celtics Coach Jose Mazulla admitted that there has been a mental disconnect within his team.  What a frustration.  What a waste.  Considering that the Boston Celtics is one of the NBA's most talented roster that is so deep even in a 10-man rotation.  That's the TRUTH BOMB dropped by Coach Mazulla, the mental disconnect⏳⏳⏳

Sometimes, life really gets harder when mental burnout creeps in.  In the simplest terms, MENTAL EXHAUSTION is tough.  Everyone of us could have had this over and over in the past.  WHEN you feel tired and drained after intense physical activity.  WHEN your long periods of intense mental activity can wear you down📌📌📌

So, what are the tell-tale signs of mental exhaustion creeping in?

• Working/Studying long hours with few breaks
• Spending much time with overwhelming burdens
• Exerting so much mental energy thinking through problems, worries and stressful stuff

At the end of the day, let us practice that MENTAL MAPPING of the game we're in because the MENTAL component is at the core✅✅✅

Reading The 'FLIGHT OF THE BALL'

Reading The 'FLIGHT OF THE BALL'

No sirrrs, our thread today is NOT about sports, definitely neither basketball OR golf but their platforms are s analogous in life such that it led us to Reading The 'FLIGHT OF THE BALL'.  So, in life, when we need to be aware of that 'FLIGHT OF THE BALL', our objective is two-fold.  First, we got to know the trajectory and secondly, we need to estimate where that ball will likely drop or land💊💊💊

So, let's ignore golfers and basketball players.  Let's look into our lives as to how do we handle the movements of the ball we start hitting the start.  In the competitive world of sports, players spend 80% of their time organizing and planning their efforts.  Obviously, everyone has his/her own way to plot his/her efforts, lay out the goals, and finally execute the plan💎💎💎

Getting organized in the first place is typically the most challenging part because he start off with a 'misstep', there is a likelihood that you will be doomed to fail.  So, HOW and WHERE do we start.  Let's piggy-back on what they call TIME BOXING⏳⏳⏳

TIME BOXING is simply organizing your schedules and priorities.  And as you may tweak it AS YOU GO, be cautious of turning it upside down along the way.  You just need to COMMIT to it.  Adding breaks in intervals will help you focus on the task in front of you without distractions or interruptions.  That Xtra focus helps you to work more effectively while still allowing for rest to prevent you from getting burnt out📌📌📌

Now, here's the thing.  Once you see the ball's flight and trajectory, know WHEN TO GIVE UP.  We got to realize that we CAN'T WIN THEM ALL [and never expect to].  You can learn a lot from missing the mark but the important skill here is knowing WHEN TO THROW IN THE TOWEL.  You can exert a lot of time and energy that would be better spent doing something else.  Lesson here is that by READING THE FLIGHT OF THE BALL you can 'NIP THINGS IN THE BUD', pre-empt failure if it becomes imminent✅✅✅

The Game Isn't Over Till It's Over

The Game Isn't Over Till It's Over

Good day folks.  For our thread today, what made me decide for this thread were the recent Games 1 & 2 of the ongoing NBA Eastern Conference Finals between Miami Heat and the Boston Celtics.  On both games, Boston was leading up to the final quarter until the whole world within the Boston Celtics collapsed and they lost.  Lesson is The Game Isn't Over Till It's Over❗❗❗

Clearly, we all deserve to either initiate or simply enjoy CELEBRATIONS.  Great leaders identify, measure, recognize and reward meaningful efforts and achievements, and celebrate often with the people involved.  Indeed, CELEBRATIONS help meet people's for inclusion, innovation, appreciation and even collaboration.  Clinical scientists say that our brains are designed to be 'SOCIAL', and the need for human contact is greater than the need for safety⏳⏳⏳

Even this news from the Daily Mail broadsheet way back December 2000 gave this headline-grabbing statement.  Not a premature CELEBRATION but instead, a premature assumption that was NOT founded on solid grounds.  Now let's listen to what neuroscience tells us that what impacts us can have that 'domino-effect' even on our healthy physical and emotional changes with those CELEBRATIONS.  What is lamentable is that we tend to be prone to celebrate prematurely.  And this is happening everyday across us📌📌📌

Heard of someone celebrating because he just signed off a job offer?  Not to clamp on what people deserve but my take is, for that scenario, I'd rather be more thankful and grateful rather than being CELEBRATORY. WHY?  Because frankly speaking, other than you signing that job offer, you have had no latest accomplishment to boot yet, at that✅✅✅

So, when do we deserve CELEBRATIONS?  WHEN we achieve a breakthrough.  WHEN we achieve something 'BIG' or 'MAJOR'  WHEN we secure a result that is unprecedented.  WHEN we reach a MILESTONE, examples of which are graduations, weddings, silver or golden anniversaries, promotion to a senior role in the organization, finally having your dream home, finally tying the knot with your 'dream girl'.  Other than this, let us NOT be like the Boston Celtics in Games 1 and 2 wherein even Coach Joe Mazulla claimed that they won 3 quarters.  BUT HEY, basketball is played in 4 quarters.  The Game Isn't Over Till It's Over❗❗❗

When MUCH Is Given, MUCH Is Required

When MUCH Is Given, MUCH Is Required

This one-liner may be ages old as the late famous American President John Kennedy was quoted "To whom MUCH Is Given, MUCH Is Required".  Indeed, this strikes at the very core of things that reverberate in our lives.  Either you are still a student in the school campus OR now wooing the 'dream girl' of your life OR you finally land a plum job OR finally hit 'pay dirt' in your first strike in your maiden foray as an entrepreneur💎💎💎

No sirrrs. while this one-liner is widely mentioned in some passages of the bible, I don't want to falsely come up with a farcical facade of a wisdom that clearly DIDN'T come from me.  Instead,  much as we are all entitled to ask and dream for the moon, if we did land that plum of a prize, that's when PAYBACK time kicks in, even if no one forewarned you on this📌📌📌

That historical admonition by President Kennedy many decades back speaks NOT only to those who benefited by material wealth OR comfort as he was addressing then those placed at the NEXUS OF OPPORTUNITIES, people who were now straddling along the corridors of power.  But hold on.  We DON'T need to go up to those lofty levels.  Instead, let us reflect as to what we wanted and what we asked in the past which we were given.  If indeed we were given, then To whom MUCH Is Given, MUCH Is Required 💊💊💊

I bear witness a few times in the past wherein I saw how some people [whom I know first hand] were angling for the best fruits up in the trees.  And they got it, harvested those premium fruits and enjoyed it.  But before you know it, they seem to have been so intoxicated with those small milestone successes when they totally blanked out, not realizing enough that To whom MUCH Is Given, MUCH Is Required❗❗❗

What is hardly publicized is that after you get your plum prize, it WON'T be long before the luster of that prize will be gone, evaporating in thin air.  Then you get into that same vicious cycle where you got to grind and kick your ass hard to get back on the road, regain that momentum and keep going all over again.  Here's a STERN warning though. After your first lapse, the margin for error is getting smaller.  To whom MUCH Is Given, MUCH Is Required✅✅✅

Do You Shrink In 'THOSE MOMENTS'

Do You Shrink In 'THOSE MOMENTS'

Oh Oh, today we WON'T attempt to be an SME in a field we are NOT [talking about health] but what does bother us from time to time is when we are confronted with:  Do You Shrink In 'THOSE MOMENTS'?  And THOSE MOMENTS refer are those many times we are in the midst of problems and challenges we're grappling⏳⏳⏳

Well, as stress is an integral part of our lives, we tend to shrug off our racing pulses and constant angst as nothing unusual.  But many researches show that even everyday stress can be leading to changes in our brain that makes us vulnerable to mental as well as social disorders ranging from depression to addiction and even behavioral conditions💎💎💎

On the other hand, studies conducted during the recent pandemic have led many experts to identify the benefits of ADVERSITY.  Apparently, seismic events of this nature challenge our faith and hope, even wanting to give up in some cases.  But then again, the recent pandemic was also a time for us to dig deeper into our inner resources and harness the ADVERSITY to fuel our resilience📌📌📌

Many people have attested that ADVERSITY catapulted them into life's deeper waters, forcing them to mine their inner resources, face the threat, and come out stronger on the other side.  Recovering alcoholics and drug addicts often report that hitting ROCK bottom is their greatest blessing because it did wake them up to a better life., one that is healthier and more satisfying.  In physical fitness circles, they call it that 'TREMOR OF TRUTH' when you test your BREAKING POINT❗❗❗

Studies have also shown that even social media has done more harm than good.  When we are stuck in the shallow of material gain [a new house, a glitzy car, exotic trips to Maldives and Bali], it can propel us into temporary highs that usually FLATTEN out after a very short time.  Seismic events, on the other hand, plunge us into an all-time low for a while.  So, why should you SHRINK IN THOSE MOMENTS✅✅✅

When The Fuse Gets Lighted

When The Fuse Gets Lighted

Allow me to introduce this as our thread today but rest assured, this is NOT about electricals or fuses BUT instead, we're referencing fuses insofar as to how it IGNITES our life.  So, When The Fuse Gets Lighted, we expect our engines to be firing in full throttle in all its cylinders.  Anyone who thinks we DON'T need a FUSE to IGNITE us, I beg to disagree because even in the field of Physics, you need that force that will create and lead to the inertia💎💎💎

Every life has a PURPOSE and in fact, many PURPOSES.  Every day, each of us is motivated to do many kinds of things.  BUT this is different than a life which is guided by a single PURPOSE.  Accumulating many different actions during the day ISN'T the same as knowing and achieving your vision.  And then, when a personal vision is found, the means to achieve it follows suit📌📌📌

Bottom line, a clear strong vision IGNITES your life PURPOSE.  There is inner motivation and outer reward.  This match between inner and outer is key when it comes to finding your life PURPOSE.  BUT, before any PURPOSE can be activated, a personal vision comes first.  The stronger your vision, the more inspired you will be.  Inspiration is the strongest motivator ever⏳⏳⏳

Bonus question to our readers:  WHY IS IT MANY of us get discouraged from pursuing their vision?  Simple answer here:  THEY LOOK TOO FAR AHEAD.  BUT hey, that is pure imagination, ISN'T it?  There was this world chess champion who was asked:  HOW MANY MOVES AHEAD HE CAN SEE.  He replied:  ONLY BUT BUT IT'S THE RIGHT ONE.  What insight can we pick up from that answer?  One move ahead is sufficient on the assumption you make the right move✅✅✅

What's our sage advice here?  Let us NOT be too tough on ourselves.  Let us give ourselves that 'ELBOW ROOM' to change tactics and commit mistakes BUT here's the catch though.  DON'T settle for a move that DOESN'T feel right.  A vision ISN'T about achieving a goal. It is more about expansion, evolution and inner fulfillment.  You CAN'T reach fulfillment if each step is discouraging, difficult or it becomes a struggle.  Keep in mind that every step should be one you want to take, NOT a step you feel you must take.  That's WHEN THE FUSE GETS IGNITED in your life❗❗❗

Take What Is Given

Take What Is Given

British Billionaire Richard Branson was once quoted:  BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES ARE LIKE BUSES, THERE'S ALWAYS ANOTHER ONE COMING.  And we can't argue with that because that's the obvious truth.  But the biggest question that befuddles me is WHY many of us tend to be scouring for any kind of opportunity when opportunities abound📌📌📌

But here's the thing.  No matter what you're after, you'll be presented with a number of challenges along the way.  So how do we prepare ourselves to seize the opportunity of a lifetime from the moment you recognize it?  Primero, develop a crystal clear vision of what you want to achieve. Let me share a bit about my past.  At one point when I was firm that I have saturated and exhausted the local career opportunities, i identified WHAT do I want, WHERE should I go and WHEN should be the timelines to achieve it💎💎💎

Fast-forward, what happened next.  I pegged my 'market search' to complete by November with the next goal that I must be short-listed for interviews by possible employers all within a span of one week because [with no scheduling overlaps] because I intended to buy my return ticket with a week's stay in that city state [yes, I'm referring to Singapore].  Final results:  I achieved all my goals within those timelines and before I flew back,  I already signed off on a tendered 'juicy' job offer⏳⏳⏳

From a scientific explanation, scientists explain that once you put your brain's "RETICULAR ACTIVATING SYSTEM' into function, that can become the difference between achieving your dreams OR simply living a life combined by both desperation + frustration.  Even physiologists have joined the fray, claiming that even your physiology will respond to an image it can visualize in your head as if it were reality❗❗❗

Swinging over to competitive sports, specifically in the NBA, crafty players play as they TAKE WHAT IS GIVEN.  Specifically, when are given the room to drive through the 'paint area', they will drive.  If they get 'double teamed', instantly they'll look for that teammate who's surely free and unguarded because of the 'double-teaming' on him.  All these translate exactly the same way in our daily life  TAKE WHAT IS GIVEN because that's your best card at that time✅✅✅

Delusions of Grandeur

Delusions of Grandeur 

No sirrrrrs, I won't veer into unknown territory.  Not even about Schizophrenia which indeed includes manifestations of delusions and hallucinations. To be aligned, let's agree on the definition of delusions which, per se, is defined as that "STRONGLY HELD BELIEFS THAT ARE NOT AMENABLE TO LOGIC OR PERSUASION AND THAT ARE OUT OF KEEPING WITH THEIR HOLDER'S BACKGROUND"📌📌📌

Frankly though, DELUSIONS are NOT necessarily false or fiction but instead, it is the process by which sometimes, they are arrived at is usually bizarre and illogical.  On the other hand, positive symptoms correspond to the general public's idea of "MADNESS".  The apprehension here is that those with DELUSIONS might evoke FEAR or ANXIETY with others⏳⏳⏳

Surely, everyone of us can bear witness to those DELUSIONS of GRANDEUR.  Like when I was in elementary and high school, I had a classmate who perennially had that DELUSION that he is 'tops' in our class.  When I finally got into the workplace environment, I had a colleague who, despite all the healthy discussions, always insisted he was right because everyone else is NOT, not until he get proven wrong💎💎💎

Lofty ambitions are NOT that bad.  In fact, they are laudable but what if such DELUSION becomes just sheer illogical and unfathomable?  If you're into a relationship, WHAT IF your DELUSION is that you are the superior one and your partner/spouse is the inferior one whose role in life is to simply kowtow to all your💊💊💊

Being overly ambitious is NEVER wrong at all but you got to ensure both your feet are still on the ground.  You got to close to REALITY, to what is FEASIBLE [versus a PIPE DREAM].  I can attest to having witnessed people with all the grandiose plans and lofty goals, which per se, were laudable but what's the probability of success from what I witnessed first hand?  A success rate of less than 1%, if at all.  Lesson for today:  LET US SET GOALS FEASIBLE & REASONABLE enough❗❗❗