When It Does NOT Gain Traction

When It Does NOT Gain Traction

Many things in life do NOT gain traction right on the first try.  BTW, some could have tried things out for the umpteenth time all in vain.  So how?When It Does NOT Gain Traction, what do we do?  Give up instantly? Or retry till we drop dead?  No sirrrrs, either way, it does NOT work that way.  For obvious reasons, why give up INSTANTLY?  On the other hand, let us take the extreme scenario when and where someone just keeps retrying and retrying forever?

Now comes social media all over the place.  As a first-person account, I did bear witness to people who just never gave up after falling flat a hundred times.  No thanks to social media, someone can keep reaching out via FB, via twitter, name it.  Does that make sense when it does NOT gain Traction

So, what exactly is traction?  Why fuss much about it?  Simple.  Gaining or NOT gaining traction is your very bellwether.  It tells us if we started things on the right or wrong foot.  While it does not guarantee that you will succeed on that endeavor, it does give us the affirmation that you are on the right path, right track

No need to look far.  Those successful athletes finally made their mark after arduous tries and trials and they all went through a game plan that was formulated not for the short-term but even for the long-term.  But how and what made them decide to pursue that long-term game plan?  It is because, at its earliest stages, they confirmed gaining traction because they were slowly seeing the fruits of their hard work, albeit in small drips and drops.

Where and when you DON'T gain traction, what do you do?  Simple.  Go back to the drawing board.  Reset.  Reboot.  Revalidate because things are way off mark.  This holds water especially in relationships.  If you and your partner/spouse have been in 'turmoil' in extended periods, re-examine, reboot and restart the relationship❗❗❗

Tomorrow is Promised to No One

Tomorrow is Promised to No One

How often do we hear:  HOW ABOUT TOMORROW?  Whether it's a task to be performed, something to be processed, an output that needs to be generated, a discussion that needs to clear up the air, a conflict that needs to be resolved, a problem that needs to be fixed but hey, Tomorrow is Promised to No One.

But we can retort, why are we NOT entitled to tomorrow?  Well, you and I are entitled to tomorrow but what is NOT promised that when tomorrow comes, the task you put off will be done, the output you need to generate will churn out the report, the discussion will transpire, that conflict will be resolved, if at all and the lingering problem will be fixed.  As this poster goes, tomorrow is promised to no one.  Semantics-wise, yes tomorrow will come but your misplaced and unfounded expectations may not materialize, if at all.

Oh yes, I got an idea for today's piece when I recently watched an old movie by Clint Eastwood, and that one-liner did hit me beyond my lapels.  Why?  Because many of us [that includes me many times in the past] invested so much hope and expectations for tomorrow, missing out the fact that what matters most is today because this is the moment.  Why do many of us put off for tomorrow what can be done, fixed, resolved or accomplished today?  I know the answer.  We got so spoiled by Father Time, skewing and even distorting our understanding, this time around, [wrongly] thinking that anything you put off for tomorrow, you will be fine.  No Senor, not at all.  

So while promises abound everywhere, let's think about the cynics, the pessimist.  How often you come across someone who worries much about tomorrow?  Like WHAT IF there will be a thunderstorm.  Like WHAT IF there will be a traffic gridlock.  Like WHAT IF there is too much work tomorrow.  Like WHAT IF you feel lazy and not so energized come next day.  And that litany goes on like you are in the infinity pool.  But can we throw out of the window all those WHAT IF [although this is the truism if you are in Risk Management].

Indeed, quite often we are in a quandary because too much is at stake and YET, too much is tied up to tomorrow, a day that was never promised to us but we kept clinging to it.  How many debacles have we witnessed wherein we end up scratching our head because when indeed tomorrow did come, alas, what we thought was NOT there, what we expected was NOT there either and the 'HAPPY ENDING' we optimistically thought did not materialize at all.

So what's the fix?  Let's have both our feet firmly on the ground.  Let us have a REALITY CHECK and as to how we are faring, let us run a PULSE CHECK to know where things are going right and where things are off track.  In our lives, when the locomotive is shaping up to be a train wreck, even before disaster strikes, there will be RED FLAGS that will pop up.  It's for you to recognize it and rectify asap.  Just constantly remember that TOMORROW IS PROMISED TO NO ONE❗❗❗

When All Hands Are On Deck

When All Hands Are On Deck

How often do we hear our leaders declare that All Hands Are On Deck?  Well, it does not happen everyday but when it does, what does it mean to us?  And obviously, the bigger question is:  WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?  But that is a question crafted for you and not for anyone else to answer.  What is at stake?  What do I gain?  What dividends will I reap?  And WHAT IF I don't lift my finger at all?

Definitely, there will be too many WHAT IFs
not because your mindset is synchronized either within your family or your organization but moreso because this equation contains one too many variables such that the results can swing as wild as the pendulum does and if you leave your own fate to that pendulum that swings, one too many WHAT IFs can lead to one too many UNKNOWNs in life.

So, when we hear marching orders like All Hands Are On Deck, what does this really mean?  Simply put, it means that either your family or organization has reached a point of reckoning where everyone needs to pitch in because not even fractions of the organization can take matters into its own hands.

Years back, my global boss sent his marching orders for us to fly to our Silicon Valley Headquarters because it was All Hands On Deck.  Long story short, two years later. our organization was part of a huge M & A [Merger and Acquisition] in the technology space and looking back, I realized flying all the way to the US was our RECKONING POINT.

What does this mean to us if at all?  Never miss that opportunity to be an integral part when All Hands Are On Deck because whether the boat sinks or survives, you will always be part of that success or undoing.  The worst thing to happen in life is when you skip and ignore things by looking the other way around.  IF that happens, that will be your UNDOING that will be most regrettable❗❗❗

How CONNECTED Are You?

How CONNECTED Are You?

Not to piggy-back with today's 'IN' thing but indeed, 'CONNECTION' has evolved to be the norm especially the past two years where we all got LOCKED OUT by this pandemic.  So, how CONNECTED are you?  Regardless if you're still a student, a worker, an entrepreneur or someone in a relationship now, to be CONNECTED is now the norm.  Ooooops, to be CONNECTED is NOT even an option for us to skip.

Oh yes, for those techie SMEs, anytime they hear CONNECTED, likely they will think of IOT [Internet of Things] but no sirrrrs, today's piece is NOT about IOT.  Instead, this is all about how are we really CONNECTED [are we?] in life but instead, we'd like to dissect as what are the consequences of being DISCONNECTED. If you're still in school, expect to struggle in your academic performance.

At the workplace, if you are DISCONNECTED,  not sure with your awareness and alignment with your organization's goals, mission and vision.  And in terms of delivery to clients, not sure if you are aligned with the quality aspects your clients demand and expect.  And if you're in a relationship, being DISCONNECTED does not augur well for your relationship because that will likely lead to gaps that may widen.

At the end of the day, what binds us in our endeavors are our being CONNECTED consistently.  Keyword here is CONSISTENCY because if we end up like a 'flash in the pan',  we are being deceptive to ourselves because sporadic flashes lend credence to doubts of your credibility in being CONNECTED.  BTW, lip service is equally self-defeating.  You can't cheat on yourself because in the end, you are pushing yourself deeper in that morass.

Ask me, what could be a game-changer or even a life-changer?  It is either being CONNECTED or DISCONNECTED because that separates the grain from the chaff.  So, there is no unwritten formula here.  Be genuine to your partners in school, at work, in your business or at the workplace and never waiver and weaken your resolve to be on the same page❗❗❗

Be QUICK to Listen, SLOW to Speak

Be QUICK to Listen, SLOW to Speak

Question:  Have you ever been advised to Be QUICK to Listen, SLOW to Speak ?  I guess, hardly and likely, nary at all.  I DON'T evem remember myself being advised on this at all.  Why?  Probably, it's because many of us are guilty of this [and I'd be the first one to admit that many times in the past, I was guilty of this too].  But then, it's never late for us to RIGHT THE WRONGS.

To take a leaf from james 1:19, Be QUICK to Listen, SLOW to Speak [AND... SLOW TO get angry]. And this truism can't be more valid.  Because, the truth of the matter is that more often than not, we have that propensity to SHOOT FROM THE HIP.  We even tend to speak way ahead of our vocals because instantaneously, we tend to pre-judge or prematurely reach to conclusion bereft of the validated facts and data that need to be pieced together to come up with the complete picture that is neither skewed nor distorted.  Let's look back into our lives and recall those repeated exceptions where we are that guilty akin to having blood in our hands.

At work, have we pre-judged some of our colleagues?  In our relationship with ur partner/spouse, HOW OFTEN were you QUICK to SPEAK yet SLOW to LISTEN? And guess what happened when we pre-judged our colleagues or even our partner/spouse?  And guess what happened next?  Did you SPEAK LOUDLY so cocksure of your raw and premature conclusions?

The mother of all ironies is that often times, communications is ongoing between two parties but what results next is still a gap, a disconnect.  Why?  More often, it is due to the fact that we are NOT actively listening.  We refuse to hear things we DON'T want to hear.  FILTERING intrudes as part of the variables in the equation.  End result?  Both the protagonists will declare "I DON'T UNDERSTAND YOU" and the gap that was originally a mile apart exacerbates to become a ten-mile disconnect, no thanks to one or two parties who either wholly or partially shut down his/her eardrums as part of FILTERING.

When things get overblown beyond proportions, what's next?  It becomes a full-blown conflict when it all started off simply as a misunderstanding. If only we are QUICK to Listen and SLOW to Speak, a hell lot of conflicts all around us could have been averted in the first place.  In the end, this becomes an unnecessary problem, a problem of our own making.  If only we are QUICK to Listen, SLOW to Speak ✅✅✅

A Season Least Expected

A Season Least Expected

All year-round, we have lots of cyclical seasons.  There's summer, winter and even Christmas Season.  But who in the world ever thought that this highly digitized world will lead us to this banner page from my banker [Citi] that Any season can be a 'PHISING SEASON'.  Indeed, it's been a rowdy, rough and tumble world we live now.

Indeed, this 'PHISHING SEASON' is the mother of all seasons.  And to give credit where it is due, year-on-year, fraudsters are always [at the very least] a step ahead of any of the crack security specialists we have in the western world.  Not even the techie SMEs from Silicon Valley can match toe-to-toe with these fraudsters.  Talk about innovation, my hats off to these fraudsters [unfortunately].  Now, lifting this pic from my Citi alert wherein it tells us to ALWAYS look for that 'PADLOCK ICON' before ever ever clicking a new URL link.

And pasting again this Citi Alert, the "DO NOT" alerts are redundantly repeated, no thanks to our stubbornness to heed to alarming alerts.  BTW, why do we have stubborn folks who end up being preyed by fraudsters?

Yesirrrrreeee, we heard this a zillion times, that CURIOSITY KILLED THE CAT.  Unfortunately, some of us seemed to have become cat-cloned because no amount of ALERTS & WARNINGS have ever dissuaded us and tempered our MISPLACED CURIOSITY.  When an unknown mail sender sends a mail with a link that's enticing us to be rewarded with generous gifts and freebies, we just can't wait to click it right away.  When we receive an SMS alert that puts us in 'ALARM' mode, we react as if we're HELPLESS.

Final words to share.  If your digital or online account does NOT have the 'LOCK' option, go and find a financial services provider offering that 'LOCK' option.  Take it from me.  When I got hit with an attempted fraud [with a 'huge' purchase from Walmart, AZ], I decided that it was time to leverage on that 'LOCK' option because that's the only proactive measure to secure your digital accounts at your unguarded moments [which could be 99% of the time]❗❗❗

Any Warts in Your Game?

Any Warts in Your Game?

No sirrrrrrs, this piece is NOT about physical health and wellness. Not my turf.  Instead, this is all about us taking stock of things, being our own worst and toughest critic who won't mince words to call spade a spade.  Any Warts in Your Game?  I won't buy it if someone retorts that he's got no warts in his game because that is no less than baloney.  Not even the success stories of Bill Gates and Elon Musk gives them that mantle of invincibility.

Let's ask any Tom, Dick and Harry.  In unison, they will loudly proclaim that there is NO need to ask them for their CHINKS in their ARMOR because they know it and are aware of it, period.  But try pressing them to dissect more and they would push you backward and reinforce their OMERTA, that traditional oath to keep their lips sealed.  Too bad, this is part of our human nature.  Generally, we refused to acknowledge and accept the WARTS in our GAME.

When in truth and in fact, those WARTS in our GAME should NOT be dreaded or avoided at all.  For all we know, those are not chronic chinks but rather it could be skills that need to be honed and sharpened.  And what will it take for us to perfect such skills, this is the most open secret everyone is aware of.  It all boils down to LEARNING and PERFECTING it over and over again.

Frankly, the myth that we do NOT have WARTS in your GAME or CHINKS in our ARMOR [as the Roman gladiators boasted] can be traced back during the long reigns and rule of the revered Roman Empire.  From the emperor down to the last gladiator standing, they swore head over heels that they were all the near-perfect warriors who would survive each battle unscathed.

Bottom line, much as our life is imperfect, we need to constantly endeavor to smoothen the corners and sharpen the edges even those tweaks will hardly move the needle.  As long as you acknowledge your WARTS in your GAME, that is consoling enough if you will append to it a remediation plan how to correct your wrongs and improve on your strengths✅✅✅

Where's the Inflection Point

Where's the Inflection Point

Here we go again.  Everyone agrees that life is never flat, not even like Planet Earth [as some wrongly hypothesized]. On the other hand, while everyone of us know fully well that indeed life is no less than a rough-and-tumble world, what befuddles us is that many of us are not lifting any finger at all on the premise that this is all part of life and there is nothing we can do.  But hey, I'll push hard on you to be incisive to figure out as to Where's the Inflection Point.

The huge challenge is that point when we hit the crossroads and our upcoming judgment call and decision could be a game-changer and even life-changing.  And here's our common pitfall. When we make decisions at an Inflection Point, such decision must be thoroughly assessed, including doing a thorough assessment of the risks because whether you go east-ward or west-ward, likely there is NO perfect option.  It all boils down on your judgment call.

The trickiest part is that at that Inflection Point, there is NO helpline, not even your close coterie, not even your cordon sanitaire, if you have one.  WHY?  Because when you get to that 'Y' road crossing, more often, the two options at hand are almost on the same footing , not offering you a runaway option but instead a close call.

Let's a sampling of nerve-wrenching Inflection Points.  If after you graduate from university, there's a Masteral scholarship offer from the U.S. Ivy League.  At the same time, here's a Fortune 500 dangling you a carrot, a job offer that's too good to refuse.  Your take?  It's your take.  In relationships, it's an altogether different ballgame.  On one hand, you want to pamper and spoil your partner by giving in to his/her whims.  Yet, from a practical standpoint, you would ask yourself:  Is it prudent?

There you go, folks.  We cannot look far ahead down the road beyond the Inflection Point that is staring right in our face.  Point is, whether you take the first option or the second option, DON'T feel bad.  Even assuming you end up picking the wrong option, it WON'T be cataclysmic but assuming your call was NOT the best but next time around, your better judgment is what you need to take you to the next level❗❗❗

No Time? Make Time!

No Time?  Make Time!

How many times in life did we blurt out that we have NO TIME?  Probably a zillion times, right? The truth is, that is mankind's most favorite and most overused excuse in life.  Whether it is for mundane things to meeting expectations of your friends to complying with workplace requirements to standing up to your responsibilities as a partner/spouse or worst, if your health seems to be failing, we are all guilty [OVER and OVER AGAIN] for finding a way out by claiming you have No Time?  

But the mother of all questions is this:  Is having NO TIME a valid and credible reason?  Having NO TIME becomes valid if emergencies and/or sudden turn of events happen in our life.  When your bosom friend suddenly flies back to the country and at that time you were on a business trip, it is a no brainer that that reason is valid.  

But if every now and then, you are chasing time as if it is ticking just too fast or you seem to be at the tail-end of things, unable to 'DELIVER the DELIVERABLE', how can you buttress the fact that more often, having NO TIME is more of a ruse, an excuse, an alibi no less.  But you might get back to me scream, BUT THAT IS NOT A CRIME!  Of course it is not but when you condone your recurring NO TIME excuse, does it hold water?

Over this most recent weekend, myself and my wife were in a dilemma because we wanted to be in two places on the same day but the catch is that those two places are 101 miles apart [and that's not even a straight line to traverse].  Lo and behold, we managed to FIND TIME, TAKE the TIME and MAKE the TIME.  How?  We had to tweak things a bit without spoiling my family's holiday schedule and at the same, keeping up to our promise to travel [whatever it takes] to be with our daughter's favorite teacher.

When we finally reached home Sunday evening, it was a miracle of sorts because 'INSPITE of WAZE' [yes that's true, the WAZE app was more of a challenge as it was pointing me to traverse across directions that would have thrown a monkey wrench to be at the place at the appointed time].  And I'd admit it was no mean feat because from the time our family had a 'quick' breakfast buffet then checking out from our hotel, I gave myself no more than three hours to be at the next destination [which place we were going for the very first time].  Lo and behold, we made it.  This latest feat we achieved just reinforces the fact that having NO TIME is the last excuse in life.  Hoping we can replicate this in our life over and over again, with no pressures to wilt⌛⌛⌛

Tidy Up OR The Mess Will Get Messier

Tidy Up OR The Mess Will Get Messier

Life is all a matter of choices and at any given time, we could end up with situations either in a mess or at the very least, not so tidy enough.  And that's fine as long as we have our buy-in that the next decision point is to Tidy Up OR The Mess Will Get Messier.  But a devil's advocate can argue, WHY NOT LET THE MESS DIE A NATURAL DEATH.  Good grief.  Too bad though, any mess in life never dies a natural death but instead, the ugly head of the snake might even spring out of it and before you know it, you have a situation that is not only unmanageable but worse, one that may be unresolvable.

Do an apples-to-apples comparison.  Isn't there a huge difference between a BEFORE and the AFTER if ever a mess did gets put back in order?  And take a contrarian view.  WHAT IF you didn't lift a finger?  Do you think the status quo would remain AS IS?  Oh, DON'T buy that fallacy at all.

So, what's really the QUICK FIX?  Dude, this is all a D-I-Y thing.  Clean up your own mess but how?  First off, atone to it, accept it, own it. From there, plot your action plan how to attack that mess.  And if we're referring to a messy relationship, that's a steep mountain to climb up and overcome.  Bottom line, is NEVER turn around and look the other way because you're DIGGING YOUR OWN GRAVE for that.  You got to pull the bull by its horn no less.

BTW, if children can clean-up their own mess, why can't we? Frankly though, taking the first step is the hardest part because you got to halt that momentum of your skid and turn it around in one hundred eighty degrees.  And that is huge turnaround!  So how?  Simplify a complex and tricky situation.  First things first.  Go for the low-hanging fruits.  Don't cherry pick though.  Take as you pick.  Take that need to fix a relationship, that could be akin to a TUG of WAR because likely, two protagonists will hold their ground and wpn't cede an inch, whatever happens.

And when protagonists reach an impasse, there will be NO QUARTERS given or taken.  Each one will dig up their heels in their respective trenches.  Oh, sorry about that.  That reminds me when I witnessed relationships eventually floundered because neither party would want to cede or give up an inch.  Why?  More often, the ugly head of PRIDE creeps in and everything just crumbles down.  So, let's put back SANITY in the rightful place and let us be fair and just if we have that good faith and resolve to really TIDY UP THINGS or the MESS GETS MESSIER❗❗❗